Austin Butler - Blog Posts

No cause #Saltburn😅😅😅😂

SO CUTEEEE.. i need him 🤗🤗 this was teew cute

NO.1 ; a taken man is off limits.

You weren't going to let Benny go; you couldn't, you had heard among your friends that stupid trick of marking territory? if that's what they were talking about. You thought maybe it was over the top and provocative. You thought it, but then you started biting your nails nervously, turning your head while sitting on Benny's lap, you saw that. You saw the looks on the faces of those eager girls who wished they were in your place, but you'd earned it, it wasn't fair for someone to try to sabotage you. So you did it, totally discreetly, didn't you? Well yes, you started leaving things at Benny's house, among his things, his clothes and on his motorbike. You took advantage of that summer afternoon when you were both sweating body to body on his motorbike to complain about your scarf, say no more! it ended up tied on one of Benny's bike handles, your scarf lasted a long time there, curious looks from the vandals. It was a long time before Benny paid attention to your nervous look traveling all over his bike. "It's ‘kay, it makes me look more harmless" he said to you before kissing your soft lips. Your hair bows were also another story, tying them in his vandal jacket to keep them from ending up misplaced and lying in some corner, dirty. He wanted to take care of you, and everything to do with you, your hair scrunchies around his wrist, your hair clips around his belt fastened or your coat folded in his lap while you talked to the other girls! oh wow...quickly Benny Cross was crossed off the list of single vandals.

giggling so bad!

oh how i loved this!!! <3

Crystal Tears

You know I loved to see Benny crying, he IS my weakness.

When you met Benny, you knew something; he was a very difficult book to read, the kind you have to read the same page about five times to try to find some detail or understand something. But you wanted to get inside, to know what every gesture or movement meant. It didn't scare you when you saw his beautiful wet eyelashes and little crystalline tears trickling down his flushed cheeks ;( His soft lips trembled and you knew he was yours, that you could finally start the book. You used to hug Benny tightly. You didn't know if you were afraid he would leave or you just felt safe (probably both), but Benny couldn't do it, no. His eyes watered at the thought of leaving you. You had done so much for him, you used to whisper pretty cute things to him, noticing that little reddish detail coming out of his soft skin, and you ran your fingers into his beard, stroking it as if he were something precious. He deserved that, he deserved to be loved, and Benny's crystal tears began to appear more often. Not because of something bad, no, Benny learned to open up, to trust, to know that crying wasn't wrong and never would be.

oh ;(

PLEASE AUSTIN FIC, i love u Lottie

Mr. Butler is an expert at stealing kisses.

I giggle and move my feet once I see Austin, he should just be ILLEGAL. Austin is definitely a shy guy, he doesn't want to neglect you in between his rise to fame, no, he doesn't. So he'll take you wherever he can, holding hands to go for coffee, paparazzi photos of him following you around Ikea as you look at things for your new apartment, which the two of you have recently bought and chosen with a glimpse of a future together ;( although he has already promised you a big dream house with mini copies of the two of you running around, and he intends to keep it, he's the kind of boyfriend who will bend down to fix loose shoelaces yes or yes, he loves you with all his heart, I don't doubt that Austin is a GOOD kisser, if that's what he is Austin will kiss you whenever he can, he'll bend down and kiss you, he'll pull you and kiss you, he'll hug you and kiss you. He doesn't care who's watching or what you're doing. He just wants to show you how much he cares for you, it's a cute hip grab that ends with your butt clinging to him, neck kisses. Yes, all in all, Mr Butler loves to kiss you.

this was so cute to write, i love you too bby ;(

Can someone anyone please right an Austin fic. I’m getting desperate over here 🤍🤍

Guys OMG I got a tester for MYSELF and wow it smells just like I imagined but in the best way possible. I’m actually obsessed🫣🫣😩😩

The moment I sat up in my seat in theaters

The moment my soul left my body.

The moment I was gone forever and he was in my head to this day.

Now the moment where I die.

His lap is SO inviting. 🔥

I’d straddle those hips so good.. 🥵

Excuse me while I go write a new smut… 👀

Guys you’ll never guess what I’m doing to celebrate Austin’s Birthday 🥳🥳

Happy birthday to our baby boy. We will love you forever 😘😘🤍🤍

Happy 1 year anniversary to the movie that has altered both my life and brain chemistry.

Austin did such a great job of portraying Elvis and I hope he is celebrating his and everyone else involved in the movies success.

Austin butler hand appreciation post part 2/?

And a bonus GIF just because

Austin Butler hand appreciation post part 1/?

Hey guys, I’ve got in my mind an Austin fic series I would love to read, but just don’t have the writing abilities. I really love the idea of being Baz and Catherine’s daughter so if anyone would be keen to write it or knows anyone who would please do bc I have been dying to read something like this for so long.

This is so adorable. I melted with all the haha’s and lol’s. I actually watched this movie last week and still can not believe he was only sixteen. I also live in NZ and all the things he said about us were very true

discovered tonight that austin had a little blog going on his official website in 2008. whoever had the sense to put all this in the wayback machine at some point, i owe you a drink and a kiss. also the movie he’s referring to here is aliens in the attic, it must’ve had a diff name at some point!

Me too Riley me too

Just thought I would share some photos of my two favourite guys together. I absolutely love their relationship and everything they do. Sorry for the terrible quality of some of the pics🤍🤍

This picture does something to me 🥵🥵🫠🫠

Will forever love Austin and his beautiful voice😘😘

Okay after the other nights Oscar results, I just wanna say that I am so proud of Austin, Baz, Catherine and everyone else that put so much hard work into Elvis. You all totally deserved to win and it is so unfair that they robbed you of that.

This won’t change how much me and the rest of the Elvis fandom love you all 😘😘

No cause why did Feyd go in for a passionate second kiss to his uncle and then look at us as if nothing happened💀

IM BACK GIRLSSSSSS, with both fine ass man🤭🤭

TikTok Creator: @99richie

Me personally I would have to fight them reports cause bitch😭, how the fuck you know I’m in a love triangle💀😭, but again I love the fucking drama🤭

Co-Stars turned Lovers A Callum Turner love story

Chapter 2: "Falling behind"

Pairing: Callum Turner x Fem!Bestfriend!Actress!Reader

Word count: 3.7k

Warnings: angst, reader feels down, Callum and reader's relationship is on pause, special guest: Barry Keoghan, hurt to comfort, reader feels left out, long talks with Austin + some smexy tension, PLOT TWIST, fluff, reader goes out with Austin and has fun... enjoy!

PARTIALLY EDITED<33

Summary: {In this chapter, reader finds herself in her thoughts after being out with friends. All of her friends are falling in love and she's falling behind... Her feelings for Callum slowly fading away but she will have to face the fact that she can't have it all...}

THIS CHAPTER IS BASED ON THIS SONG:

Previously on Co-Stars turned Lovers...

That night was a night you've never forgotten but what you were completely oblivious too was that that night was unforgettable to Callum too.

He thought about that night everyday he looked at you... everytime he touched you... everytime he sees lip gloss coat your full lips.

It plagued his mind like a virus corrupting a humans mind. He wanted you badly but he knew he couldn't have you. He couldn't ruin this relationship he had with you, this beautiful friendship, but goddamn were you addicting.

you and Callum were polar opposites yet destined to be together...If only you two could open your eyes and see what is right in front of you.

You and him were made for each other, you just needed to find each other. Like two lost souls searching for a purpose. Like the Earth and the Moon, they look platonic but one can't live without the other. Destined to fall in love either way.

Love, fate, and desire... Something you two need to give into in order to find yourselves.

You were out to brunch with a couple of your friends from high school. You guys were a tiny knit group, just the four of you, together all the time and never breaking up.

The one thing you hated about being in this group was... you were the only one without a man. You were 32 years old and still to this day haven't found a man.

The main problem was because nobody met (Callum's standards) your standards. They weren't like Callum. Another main reason was because you never really wanted to do that dating thing, going online then meeting up with them only to find out there a total dick.

It was sad though, it still broke your heart. Vanessa would have a funny story to tell about her husband, Sandra always had gossip about these guys at her boyfriends job, and Stacy would always have something to say about her husband and his family and how spectacular they were.

Whilst you, you never had anything to contribute to the conversation. They would ask you about work and if you've gotten a role or a casting call but never, EVER will they ask you if you have a man unless you bring it up.

Because they know. They know you haven't gone out to find one, they know your phone has zero messages or notifications from a dating app about how you and some random named dave matched.

They know that you're stuck up on one man and one man only.

"Did you hear me?" a muffled voice said. You look up and realize they are all staring at you. Vanessa was next to you with a hand on your shoulder (she was the one that spoke) and Sandra and Stacy were in front of you with worried looks on their faces.

"Huh, what did you say?" you ask with confusion. You chuckle and speak again, "Sorry, I was zoned out badly wasn't I." When you realize that that didn't exactly lift the mood your smile fades and you clear your throat.

"I said, when are you gonna tell him?" Vanessa repeats her previous statement. "Huh, tell who what?" you ask confused.

"Callum silly!" she says with a smile. Your eyes widen and she laughs. "Hi! Hello, do you remember who I am? Awkward me could never tell him I love him." you respond taking a sip of your lemonade.

"Oh please, you already tell him you love him, you need to tell him you're in love with him. There's a difference." she ends in a sing songy voice.

"yea well even if I did do that, he doesn't feel the same." you say with your head down.

"EXCUSE ME!" Stacy yells out. "Do I need to remind you of the story you told us about a thousand times? "OMG Callum kissed me last night and we were all alone!" Do you remember now?" She says with a scrunched up look on her face, her eyes narrowed at you in an accusing manner.

"That was not what I said at all Stacy... I said that we were a bit tipsy and he called me beautiful and then kissed me. He immediately apologized and we both forgot about that night like it was nothing." You say with your head in your hands.

"Babes, that was clearly not nothing." Sandra says. "There's no way being a little tipsy makes you all lovey dovey and kiss someone like that. You remember us in our college days. Being tipsy doesn't make you do bold moves like that."

You shake your head, "well then if he was still in his right mind, why didn't he confess his feelings right then and there? Why apologize and make a deal to forget it ever happened?" You counter to her argument.

"Maybe he's scared? Doesn't wanna ruin a good friendship and make it awkward if you didn't feel the same?" Stacy responds.

"Or maybe he's a pussy." Vanessa says. You all look at her shocked. Stacy is shaking her head while you and Sandra are just staring at her.

"What!? it's a fact though isn't it?" she defends. You all shake your heads. "Anyways..." Stacy says, "He's doing the same thing your doing. Testing the waters and as soon as he feels he's going too far, he overthinks and then shuts down."

"Stacy does have a point girl. Communication is always key in a relationship. That's how me and Brad got through are arguments so well. A majority of the time is was over a lack of communication." Sandra says.

"Yea but you guys were already in a relationship. You both have already gone through that stage of getting to know each other. Me and Callum have known each other for years now, and still I don't know how to approach him. I feel like if I put all that on him, he'll get scared and leave me. I've become to attached to him for him to leave me..." You say sadly with tears in your eyes.

Before anyone can say anything, you get a phone call. "It's uhm it's Barry, I gotta take this." You say wiping away the tears that escaped.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Are you busy right now?" He asks.

"Nope, I'm just out with friends. Why? What's wrong Bare?"

"Nothing, just wanted to talk to you about Callum, can you come over? If not we can stay on the phone?" He says

"Yea, I kinda can't leave right now but I can stay on the phone. What about Callum?"

"Well he's uhm-" before barry could finish you hear yelling over the phone.

"CALLUM CALM DOWN!" You know who's voice that is, it's Austin's.

"uh barry, what is going on?"You say chuckling over the phone as you pace around the outside of the cafe.

"So yea, your not the only one with separation anxiety. Callum has been crying and screaming for the past three hours because he misses you. We got off our plane about 5 hours ago and then he saw you on the billboard about 3 hours ago and now he's been crying about wanting to hold you ever since."

You laugh out loud and laugh the happiest most genuine laugh you have laughed in hours. Soon you get an incoming facetime call from Barry and you see Callum's eyes immediately.

"Hi loveee! It's you! Why aren't you here?? COME HERE NOW! I need you please!!!! Your my pookie! is that how you say that word? pookie? poooookie?! ha!" he says over the phone.

"I'm coming Callum, don't worry. Barry! I'll be there shortly ok? Just hang on folks." you respond with a smile on your face.

You hang up the phone and go back inside the cafe. The girls all look at you with worried expressions yet again.

"I have to go, Barry needs me to help him with something." You say with a small smile on your face.

"To help with something or someone?" Vanessa says with a smile on her face.

"Oh shut up! Bye girls! I'll talk to you guys tomorrow!" you yell out and wave.

You walk to your car, get in and turn on the radio hoping it will bring you good spirits.

The moment you turn it on a lovely upbeat melody begins.

"Moved out to a new city, June is dawning down on me."

you listen to the lyrics closely as you back out of the parking lot.

"And all that I can find, A sickly romance in the air. Lovers stroll without a care in sight, ooh this can't be right..."

You shake your head, "Sure is." you say while driving. You turn it up a little more.

" 'Cause the sun's engaged to the sky. And my best friend's found a new guy"

"wow. these lyrics hit deep, why does this relate to me so much." you say sadly.

"I'm only getting older I've never had a shoulder to cry on, Someone to call mine"

"Everybody's falling in love and I'm falling behind"

You turn off the radio and sink in your seat as you ease up to a red light.

You think about what the lyrics said and about how your life is going versus your friends lives.

you turn the radio back up and listen some more.

"Touched the ocean, fell right in Stepped outside and burned my skin My life won't go my way."

That part is very true. Your life just doesn't seem to go your way, especially in the love aspect of it.

"Bossa nova in my room Hope that I'll find someone too to love Because"

"The sun's engaged to the sky And my best friend's found a new guy I'm only getting older"

You are only getting older. You're 32 and still haven't found someone to call yours.

"I've never had a shoulder to cry on Someone to call mine Everybody's falling in love and I'm falling behind"

You start to cry as your thoughts overwhelm you, speeding the car up by stepping on the gas a little harder.

"Everybody's falling in love Everybody's falling in love, oh Everybody's falling in love but me"

you hear the last of the melody before you finally reach Barrys house. You just sit in the driveway head on the steering wheel as you cry your heart out.

You hated this, god how much you hated this. Seeing your friends in happy relationships while your sitting here suffering. Suffering from the fact that you are falling behind.

Suffering from the fact that every time you look at Callum, you get butterflies. Every time he touches you, your skin burns with love for the rest of the day.

You don't get that feeling with anyone else. You used to get that feeling with Austin, but then he found a girlfriend. Yea they broke up and you could always go to Austin but you don't wanna do that to him

You don't wanna ruin a good friendship where everything is pink and white. Love fucking sucks. Maybe you do need to talk to someone about this. Austin! Austin! Austin!

A little voice is telling you to talk to the person you trust and love the absolute most(apart from Callum).

You wipe the tears from your eyes and the smudged mascara on your eyes and walk towards the door.

You knock and to your lovely surprise it's Austins face. Also to your surprise, his face is sad.

"Austin?" You ask grabbing his face. "What's wrong?" you say with a sad frown on your face.

"I should be asking if your ok?" he says. Your face obviously contorts into one of confusion choosing to push all your feelings down.

"what do you mean?" you ask confused. He pulls his phone out and it shows an article that was posted 35 minutes ago. It has a photo and video link posted below. You begin to read the article...

Y/N Y/L/N SEEN CRYING OUTSIDE OF A CAFE WHILE ON THE PHONE, SHE IS HEARD SAYING CALLUM TURNERS NAME AND AUSTIN BUTLERS NAME: Many say that y/n y/l/n was crying while on the phone. She was heard and seen by many fans and people who stood on the sidelines. What could have possibly occurred to make actress and famous award-winning woman cry. Well many witness took videos and pictures that are all linked below. Could this possibly be a love triangle between her, Callum Turner and Austin Butler? Could she be crying because she doesn't know what to do? Well, stay tuned as they are being interviewed tomorrow by the one and only JIMMY FALLON: ON THE TONIGHT SHOW!

you read the end and your eyes are wide the entire time after you finish reading the article.

Austin puts his hand down and tucks his phone in his pocket. He looks at you. "I don't care about the love triangle why were you crying?" he asks.

"You may not care Austin but I do, it doesn't matter why I was crying and that so called video was weeks ago! I wore that outfit 2 weeks ago! Does that look like the outfit i'm wearing today? Fucking love triangle!? Are you fucking kidding me!?" you say throwing your hands up.

"I've already had the most shitty day ever and now this!? Why honestly can't I just be left alone? THIS IS FUCKING INSANE!"

Austin stands there looking at you. "Oh don't gimme that look Austin!" you yell out.

"what? what look y/n?" he says lowly. You stare at him and make eye contact for the longest time it felt as if time just stopped.

"I honestly d-don't know. Your giving me two looks. One looks like i'm fucking insane and the other look..." you trail off.

"what's the other look?" he asks with an eyebrow raised as he turns around to close the front door behind him leaving the both of you standing outside.

"Like i just hung up the moon and all the stars in the sky." you say breaking eye contact and looking at your feet.

"Maybe it's both." he says with a shrug. You look up at him with wide eyes and blink. 'What did he mean by that?' you thought. Before you could say anything Barry walks out with a tired and annoyed look on his face.

"You. And You. Inside. Now. Before I Pew pew him and myself." he says in his accent that you found just so adorable.

Austin chuckles and opens the door motioning for you to go in first.

"In you go M'lady." he says with a smirk on his face. You smile and walk in. You remove your shoes and walk over to where Callum is sitting on the couch.

"Hey Callum." you say with a smile, but when you say it he doesn't respond. As quickly as the smile came on your face is as quickly as it left.

You look at Austin and mouth 'did he see it?' and Austin nods yes. You sigh and look back at him. He doesn't even look at you. 'Why should he be mad, your the only one that should be pissed here.' you thought. It just wasn't making any sense.

Maybe Vanessa was right, Callum is being a pussy and you couldn't take it anymore, your finally realizing you can't have it all.

Maybe it's ok to be falling behind...

"You know what. Let's just cut to the chase." You say standing up and going to the front blocking the tv from Callum's view.

"We all saw the stupid article, ok? So Callum stop acting like a fucking baby about it. I don't know why you possibly could be upset or whatever batman broody mood your having but let's get one thing clear. Maybe 2 things."

Austin leans against the wall and Barry sits on the coffee table next to Callum.

"Number 1: That video was from 2 weeks ago. That isn't a new video. Number 2: I'm done being stereotyped because I have male friends and it's all "Oh there totally fucking" or "Yea no there definitely in love!" Like no were not! So if you and you know." You say pointing to Callum and Austin, "That we are not a thing and we are not dating, why is it affecting you so much." you say pointing to Callum again.

"Barry calls me over here for you, I finally get here and I get what the silent treatment? We all have an interview tomorrow and you wanna sit here in your fucking feelings cause of what? Me crying?" you say with a bitter laugh.

"I love all of you. Your my boys! But right now you feel like strangers to me. Especially you Callum. So if. you wanna be. on non-speaking terms and put this talk or friendship on pause by all means! Cause I can't keep doing these mixed feelings and one second your happy and wanna see me and the next you can't even look at me."

There's silence in the room for a. whole minute and you shake your head and scoff, "I fucking knew it. Well bye Barry, it was nice seeing you and hearing from you. Bye Austin, I'll text you later." You say before walking out of the door and slamming it.

You walk to your car and get inside. You don't turn it on you just sit there and breath. You feel like crying but what's the point. Your done. Done with Callum, done with those stupid feelings.

It's time to move on cause you can't have it all.

*knock knock!

You look up and turn towards the window. You see Austin's face and give him a weak smile before rolling down your window.

"Hi princess." he says. A nickname he's given you since you first started filming Masters of the air.

"Hi my prince." you say adding onto the little joke. He smiles at you and you wanna cry.

Callum used to smile at you just like that... God you have to get Callum out of your head!

"I know, you know. That your in love with him." Austin says as he fiddles with your steering wheel.

Your eyes widen at his confession and you proceed to talk. "How do you-"before you can even finish he interjects.

"It's obvious y/n. The way you look at him. The way. your eyes light up whenever he's mentioned in. a conversation or how giddy. you get whenever you talk about him." He explains.

"I's that obvious?" you say lowly.

"Your that oblivious? Everyone sees it. Why do you think the whole world believes your dating? They know what it looks like when someone is in love."

"But that leaves m-me and you... The whole love triangle thing. The fans never catch us together and only a few ship us together." You say oblivious to the truth.

"You know what I said about the way you look at Callum?" He says and you nod slowly trying to understand where he's going.

"It's the way I look at you..." He says looking away from your eyes. Your eyes widen with realization.

"Oh Austin... get in the car, we're going for a drive." you say smiling at him.

He shows confusion but your eager and motion for him to get in the passengers seat.

He runs to the other side and gets in. The both of you drive in silence for about 5 minutes before you say something.

"Austin...You know you didn't have to hide it from me right?" you say taking a glance at him.

He looks at you while your driving and pulling in to a McDonalds drive thru. "Yea I know, but you like someone else, sorry no, you love someone else. How can I get in the way of that especially when it's two of my best friends?" he says as you pull up to the board to order.

"Hold that thought ok? Hiii can I get Quarter Pounder with cheese please, and A large fry with a cola and a vanilla cone please?" You ask. The lady repeats the order and asks, "Is that all for you today?"

you look at Austin and ask, "Do you want your usual Austin?" He stares at you and smiles. "I'll take that as a yes!" you say with a chuckle.

"No, can I also get a double cheeseburger with a large fry and a lemonade with a chocolate chip cookie please? That's all!" you say with a smile.

She tells you order total and tells you to pull up to the window. You roll up your window again and turn to Austin as you sit in the line.

You guys pull up to the window and you give the lady your card and grab your food before you pull into the parking lot and turn off the car.

"Well I mean your my celebrity crush you know that? You've been my crush since Elvis, not even! Since like Sharpay's fabulous adventure." you admit.

His eyes widen as he takes a bite of his fry. "There's no way, your insane!" He says with a laugh which causes you to laugh with him.

"Yep!" you say stuffing your face with fries. "I've like been obsessed with you ever since then. Was always so excited to meet you and one day, I got to see you, and that was when like 14 year old me's dream came true. I got to act on screen with you for the first time." You say with a smile on your face.

"I never knew that. You just make me love you more every day you know that?" Austin admits to you as he looks out the window. He eventually turns to you as he takes a sip of his lemonade to wash down his food.

"Austin..." you say before he cuts you off. "I know I know, can't admit my feelings for you, I know." He says lowly and slowly.

"Austin..." you try to say but again he cuts you off. "How am I supposed to do that though? I mean your just like so gorgeous and like one of the best things that's ever happened to me. What can I do to change your mind y/n? Hmm? I just need to know how you fee-" he's cut off with you grabbing his face and kissing him.

His eyes are wide until they flutter closed and relish in the feeling of your mouth on his.

From what feels like hours is only minutes and you guys pull away and his eyes are still closed.You open your eyes and giggle at his reaction.

"Does that answer your question Austin?" you say with a smile on your face. His eyes open and he smiles back at you.

"Yea, but what about Callum?" He asks. You smile even wider now. "Austin, baby, I wanna forget about being in love with him all together! I want you know, why chase after a man who doesn't want me clearly and can't get his priorities straight when I have a man who loves me for me and sees me and is someone I've had a crush on since 2011." You say laughing and smiling with him.

He grabs your face and kissed you again. "Hey y/n?" He whispers out.

"Yea Austin?" you whisper back with a content smile on your face. "Wake up." he says.

You pull away and when you look at him with confusion, real you shoots up out of bed and wakes up realizing it was all a dream...

Taglist: @willyoubemycherryy. @dustbunniess/ @evbunnie @emmaafinchh @dumbbxtch23 @sexualparkour @b1mb0slvt + anyone else who cares to join<33

BOAF BITCH🤭✌🏾💕

TikTok Creater: @editzbybellz

It’s he’s song guys🤭😫

TikTok Creater: @editzbybellz

Is the prompt from "put the radio on"...????🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀

Blue jeans | Benny Cross

Pairing. Benny Cross x afab!reader

Prompt. ‘Told you when we met what you were in for.’

Warnings. Slight spoilers if you haven’t seen the movie yet!, angst (like a lot) cause that mane Benny needs a hug fr, language (cussing), one mention of character death, smoking cigarettes anddddd I think that’s it

Note. Tried to write the dialogue the best way I could to go along with the movie and how they talk in Chicago but I most likely didn’t do as well as I think I did cause I’m from Mississippi (yeah country asf living in the southern belt) and sometimes you can see it in my writing lmao. Got the inspo to write this form the song blue jeans cause it’s LITERALLY about him you can’t tell me otherwise. Also, Kathy is the star of this movie I swear. Anywho enjoy 😇

Wc. 3.2k+ (gah damn)

None of this was your speed. The grown men crowded around the bar from the front doors to the back wall, all huddled into groups like they were planning something. Earrings hanging out some of their ears while others had their belly buttons showing - the coils of chest hair damp with sweat as visible as ever, but it was obvious that they couldn’t care less. From the moment you opened the door, clouds of cigarette smoke that outweighed the amount of oxygen there was puffed into your face. It swirled around so much that you could see it in the air. And the way they spoke - you couldn’t believe your ears. It was all ‘F’ this and ‘F’ that so much that it could drive a person up the wall or make their ears bleed. 

Oh, these guys were animals. But they all had one thing in common— the jacket they wore. 

Walking in, you kept your head down as you shoved past all the bozos that made it almost impossible to get to the table your aunt was waving you over from, so you didn’t get a good look at them. You didn’t want to get a good look at them; by first glance, you’d seen enough. 

It was obvious that you didn’t fit in with a single person in that bar. Hands gripped at your hips as you passed through the crowd - a blatant look of almost disgust and fear on your face. When you sat down, a shaky breath escaped your lips as you scanned the bar, wide eyed, like a deer in headlights. You could hear your aunt telling you to calm down— that these guys just wanted to have a little fun.

No matter how bad you didn’t want to stare, you couldn’t help it. Gaze locked on the back of one of the guys' jackets, you could see the patches that littered it with all kinds of words and symbols; but on the back, there was a skull with big white letters above it—

“Vandals— the hell you got me in here with these guys for?” you said in a low voice like you were afraid one of them might hear you.

“Whatever, niece, these guys ain’t all that bad.”

“I don’t even know what a Vandal is,” the look on her face told you that she didn’t either. Of course you knew about these ‘motorcycle clubs’ that keep popping up all over the midwest, but you never put a second thought to it. They were a bunch of guys that had too much time on their hands— with that time, they sat around and talked about bikes all day while getting stoned and drunk. 

It was obvious that they were, in fact, one of these clubs. The moment you pulled up to the bar, there were rows upon rows of motorcycles out front. That sight alone made you get back in your car and contemplate driving off. You didn't want anything to do with any club, that's why you had been so alert since you got there. Eyes darting around to try and keep an eye on all of the men that were in your view.

“And that's exactly what your problem is, niece, you're such a square.”

“I’m not a square… I’m just not stupid.” An audible scoff came from her at your words. You could see her get up from the table out of the corner of your eye as you continued to look around the bar. She’d said something about getting a drink before she left, but you couldn’t focus on her right then - too busy trying to hear what the group of guys huddled near your table were plotting. They had to have been plotting something, cause who just gets in a huddle with their arms around each other to ‘talk’? People who plot shit.

After waiting a little while for your aunt to return, you couldn’t take it anymore. Lord knows you didn't want to be in this place any way, let alone by yourself. You stood from your seat and tried to look around people who were in your way to see if you could see where she had gone. But you didn’t.

Letting out a heavy sigh, you sat back in your chair reluctantly with a scowl on your face. Arms folded across your chest, you tried to look as unapproachable as possible to everyone who passed by your table.

“What’s with the look?”

A deep, almost gravely voice came from beside you - where your aunt had been sitting before. It should have scared you, but it was soothing to hear. You turned towards the voice to be met with a tall, lean yet muscular man who stood before you. A few tattoos littered his arms from what the sleeveless shirt allowed you to see. Two chunky-ish rings blinged in the dim lighting above the table. His dirty blonde hair matches the bit of stubble on his face.

Staring, wide eyed at him, you couldn’t bring yourself to speak— or to blink. You had never seen a man like this a day in your life. He didn’t look like the rest of those animals in this bar. Hell, he looked better than any man outside this bar.

Swinging a chair around towards you, he sat close enough to where you could feel his breath fan against your face. The look in his eyes was amusing and expecting as he waited for you to answer his question. But you couldn’t. You just stared at him.

From the moment you saw him, in the best way possible— he made your eyes burn.

He chuckled lightly before licking his lips, resting his chin on his forearms. “I’m Benny.”

“Hi…” You said breathlessly. That same slick smile on his lips, he stood from his chair wordlessly, running his hand along the back of yours before walking away.

-

Your arms folded across your chest tightly as you waited to cross the street right outside the bar to get to your car. There were no other cars coming, but you were still waiting for the ‘walk’ signal. Crisp air blew harshly against your ears to the point where they hurt— but that was the last of your thoughts. Every other thought in your mind was clouded or disappeared. All of them were taken over by the thought of him. Of Benny.

He was unlike anything you’d ever seen. His image burned into your head: the black, sleeveless shirt that showed off his tattooed arms. Dark washed blue jeans. Blue eyes that looked as if they had everything to hide. Bruised hands that had two large rings, but his hands made them look small. Stubbled face. It was like James Dean. Everything about him was the opposite of you— a match made in heaven.

The bar door opened behind you, making you look over your shoulder. Benny walked out of the bar, hand digging out a cigarette and a lighter. You watched, unable to look away as he placed the cigarette between his lips, cupping his hand around it so the wind wouldn’t blow out the fire from the lighter. He stuffed the lighter into his Vandals jacket pocket, swinging his leg over his bike before kicking it as hard as he could. The engine roared loudly that it sounded like it would break down any minute. The sound of it made you jump, pulling you back to reality.

A blinking light flashed, telling you that you could walk across the street - but you stood there - arms still folded, eyes burning from your stare, lips chapped from the air.

Benny twisted the handle of his bike, looking over his shoulder at you wordlessly. Taking a long pull before blowing the smoke out slowly. The sight made your head fuzzy, it was beautiful.

The bar doors opened again and people came rushing out. Your heart skipped a beat at the sudden yelling and chanting. You had no clue what the hell they were on about, but when you looked back at Benny, you could see him scoot forward on his bike while looking at you with a crooked smile. Your steps were slow as you approached his bike, eventually reaching it and placing your hands on his shoulders gently.

Swinging your leg over and settling on the seat, you could feel Bennys hand cup around the back of your knee, moving you closer to him before he kicked at the bike again and took off through the red light.

Your cheek pressed against his shoulder, arms wrapped around his waist tightly. As many stop lights as he's run from the time you got onto that bike-- you should be terrified for your life. Your eyes shut tightly each time he sped between cars. Each time, you gripped onto him harder.

His same laugh from earlier reached your ears. “I got you. Don’t worry, dove, okay?”

Nodding against his shoulder, you opened your eyes to see that you were approaching the highway. A smile spread onto your lips softly at the sight of the open road. No one else in sight for miles.

Just you and Benny.

-

“Benny, where are you going?” Your voice was soft, words slightly mumbled from you biting nervously at your thumbnail as you watched Benny from the doorway, pulling on his Vandals jacket hurriedly.

“Gotta go meet Johnny.” His words were almost dismissive as he picked up his bike keys, shoving them in his pocket with his cigarettes. Of course. You knew that the club was Bennys family… Johnny was like his father. But the club isn't the same anymore. It’s not how it was when you met Benny. So much had changed in a year. You married Benny within weeks of meeting him. You became a part of his life— his riding, his loyalty to the club, his hospital visits, his fights, his lawyers and jail cells.

He moved in with you and everything you knew changed. It wasn’t that you didn’t want Benny in your house or a part of your life. You loved him with everything in you. Any time the phone would ring, your heart stopped, thinking something had happened to Benny… again. But now, you couldn’t imagine your life without him. He was all you cared for. But this fucking club.

You couldn't take it anymore.

It wasn’t so bad at first. Sure, you had to get used to the drinking and smoking and Benny being out till 4 in the morning almost every. Single. Night. But the club was like a second family now. Until Brucie died.

Benny didn’t seem to be phased by any of it though. Brucies death, the drug deals being ran all the way from Canada, the new members who challenged Johnny everyday of his life. Of course, you knew Benny was seeing what you were seeing. But he still stayed with the club. Even after all the messed up shit that had been happening that made you tell him that it was getting out of hand— he still defended it.

“Meet Johnny for what..?” your words were hesitant as you took a step into the door, eyes scanning over Benny. He avoided your gaze, something he's been doing a lot recently. Since you had met Benny, he always stares into your eyes as if he were searching them. He didn’t do that anymore.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. I'll be back later tonight.”

“Benny.” You said his name. Louder this time. His Blue eyes reluctantly trailed up to yours, brows raising once to show you that he was listening. Shrugging your shoulders, you shook your head slowly. You couldn’t find the words you wanted to say. You wanted to say so fucking much. You were sick of this life— sick of worrying about where he is, if he's gotten caught up in something that you didn’t know how to get him out of.

He said your name in an almost hushed voice, gaining your attention.

Taking a shaky breath, your wide, tired eyes found him. “I don’t know how much more of this you can take, Benny.” He dropped his head, shaking it as a dry chuckle escaped his lips. “The hell are you goin’ on about, dove.”

Bennys’ voice always had so much power over you. His words and the way he used them had so much more. The way he called you dove. In the early days of the two of you, Benny told you that he called you dove cause you were too pure for him. Too different— perfect, almost. He said that you could fly away from him at any given moment, but you never did. That meant the world to him. Your loyalty to him reminded him of why he loved you so much: you’d never go anywhere, no matter what he did. No matter what happened.

“You’re gonna sit here and tell me what I can and can’t take?” He said as he propped himself up against the dresser behind him.

“No, Benny, that's not what I’m sayin’.” You stepped closer to him, arms still folded across your chest. “I’m sayin’... I can’t handle worrying about you every second of every day. I worry even when you're next to me cause everytime I look at you, I see how drained you look. I don’t like seeing that when I look at you— it hurts me”

Benny lifted his head to look into your eyes. Your eyes searched his relentlessly, trying to find something in them— but it was the same as it was when you met him. Like he was hiding the world behind those pretty blue eyes. “I’ll leave then.”

“What?” Your face dropped as your arms fell slack at your side. “Don’t do this right now.” Benny had a bad habit of every single time something went wrong, and you came to him with a pained look on your face, he would tell you that he would just leave so that you didn’t have to worry about him anymore. He said it so much that it made you think he just said it so that you would beg him not to. Of course, Benny would never be that cruel to you. He never said things to just hurt you. He meant what he said, the only reason he never followed through was because he would think of you.

“Then don’t- don’t come to me with this again. We’ve talked about this before.”

“Well, we need to talk about it again. I don’t want you in the club no more, and I mean that.” You had never been so direct with your request as you were being right now, always afraid of what he would say. Afraid he would choose the club over you.

“Don’t ask me that…” His voice was cold, but you could hear the bit of pain in his words. “You know I can’t do that.”

“Do you not remember how we were before the club started changing? Don’t you remember the night we met?” Tears pricked in the corners of your eyes as you stood close to him now. Before the Vandals went to shit, you and Benny seemed perfect. To everyone on the outside, they would say that your relationship was far from it, but you didn’t think that. You would go with Benny to every meeting, every ride, every picnic. You would lay on his chest and sit in complete silence while you watched whatever was on TV. He would take you for rides at all hours of the night. Speeding past every stop sign in sight as he whispered to you to hold onto him tight. To never let him go. When things began to get bad, but not as out of control as it was now, Benny tried to tell you that he wasn't good for you anymore; but it was too late now. You were too in love with him.

“I barely get to see you now. You go out every night doing God knows what with them, and you don't show up until the next night. But it didn’t matter to me cause I told you that no matter what, I'll be by your side.” The tears that you held onto for dear life eventually fell, rolling down your cheeks as you brought your hand to his face. You gently tilted his head to look at you— fingers rubbing his cheeks with all the care in the world. “I love you more than any of them ever could, Benny. I want a life with you, and we can't have that if you keep up with them.”

His eyes found yours as he silently looked at you. Bennys’ lip twitched so slightly that it almost went unnoticed. Bringing his thumb to your cheek, he wiped away a fresh tear that was falling from your eye at that very moment.

“Told you when we met what you were in for.”

His words cut you more than any knife could. Kissing your finger that was closest to his lips, he wrapped his hands around your wrist, he pulled them from his face gently. He stood fully, causing you to back away, looking at him with wide eyes and furrowed brows. You were scared. “Benny? Benny, what are you doing?” You said urgently.

He walked out of the room and down the small hallway, towards the front door. “I’ll be back, dove, I promise.”

“No- No, Benny! Benny, don’t you walk out that door—“ Your voice broke with sobs as you followed behind him, tugging at his shoulders and arms desperately. He could leave. You couldn’t let him leave. It didn’t matter if he said he’d be back-- that could be days later. Weeks, maybe months. You didn’t even want to think of the possibility of years. “Please, please don’t leave… I swear Benny if you walk out that door.”

He paused for a moment, standing in the open doorway. You stood behind him, close enough to where he could hear you choking back your cries. Benny hated himself for making you worry so much. He hated himself for making you cry. You were his girl, his wife, his dove. He never wanted to hurt you.

Wordlessly, he stepped out of the door, slamming it behind him before quickly going down the steps of your front porch. Getting out the keys for his bike, he sat on the tearing leather seat quickly as he kicked at it when the key was in the ignition. He sped down the road, through all the stop signs.

You wanted to scream after him, but you didn’t. Instead, you locked the door and rested your forehead against it as it pounded from your sobs. No matter how many times Benny leaves, how many times you cry over him or for him, your feelings for him will never change. You would always wait for him to come back to you.

Your loyalty belongs to him. Your love belongs to him. You belong to him.

Yes,sir

The king of Rock ‘n Roll would have been 87 years old but sadly on this day 45 years ago he passed at the age of 42 in his home Graceland in Memphis,Tennessee. It’s an absolute tragedy what happened to him. He deserved so much better then what he had gotten and thank you so much for bringing Rock ‘n Roll to us. Long live The king, Elvis Presley.

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