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Review: Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

Rating: 4.0 of 10.0

I have to be honest, and I’m going to drop the bomb this early in the article: Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice is the single most boring movie I’ve ever watched in the theater in a long time–and I’ve endured A Good Day To Die Hard. Even that movie still wins favors from me for being a quick 90-minute movie with an earnest desire to be as simple and as loud as possible. BvS, on the other hand, is 2 and a half hours long and the studio themselves proudly stated that (I paraphrase, but I kid you not it’s true) “there will be no jokes in this movie”. They lied, by the way. There were a couple of jokes, maybe 3, but none of them were remotely funny. Maybe that’s what they meant. Of course not every movie should be witty–but when a movie is bad and you can’t even laugh, that’s when a movie-going experience becomes a torture.

BvS, actually, had a promising beginning. It still insisted to have a scene of the Wayne’s parents death and of little Bruce’s fall into the cave, which I am so tired of. Okay, I get it. Bruce’s parents were murdered in front of him as a child and that’s his origin story, but that’s how it’s been in every iteration of Batman. We don’t need to be retold the same story all over again, particularly because this version of Batman had been around the streets for 20 years. But if you must have the scene for the simple fact that your movie has Batman in it, I made peace with it. The next scene though, was quite excellent and actually gave me hope that this would be a great movie (I was wrong). It was of Bruce Wayne (Ben Affleck), in the exact moment of Man of Steel’s final battle when Superman (Henry Cavill) and General Zod (Michael Shannon) destroyed half the city–and apparently, a Wayne building. To see the effects of the battle from a pedestrian perspective was genuinely terrifying, and that created an understandable motive for Bruce Wayne to hate on Superman.

In fact, Batman is the only decent thing to come out of this movie. Ben Affleck actually makes a pretty good Batman, at least as good as the movie lets him be. Admittedly his motive on hating Superman might not be the most logical (after all Superman is the person who saved them all, city-wide destruction notwithstanding), but experiencing that much destruction in front of your eyes might do something to you. Honestly though, Batman is kind of insane in this movie. He has repeating nonsensical nightmares, is fixated on killing Superman on an unhealthy level, and brands criminals with his logo for no apparent reason. But, his solo fighting sequence is the only interesting one compared to the rest, and the simple fact that Ben Affleck is a better actor than Henry Cavill makes him the better half of the bunch.

Superman is where it all falters. First, I’d like to point out that I actually kinda liked Man of Steel, which is the prequel to BvS. Zack Snyder, who directed both movies, takes the idea of Superman, an all-American hero, and turned it on its head with MoS. What if, he asks, Superman is not regarded as a hero but as an alien threat instead? It was a compelling question, and one he began to answer in MoS. But in order for MoS to work (which is an origin story), it has to be followed by a rather traditional Superman movie, otherwise MoS would be pointless. Instead with BvS, Snyder continues to try to subvert the idea of Superman, but he hasn’t earned any of it. BvS tries to discuss the dichotomy between “Superman as a savior” vs “Superman as a monster”, without first establishing the savior part of Superman at all (neither in MoS or BvS). The result is a gritty Superman movie that both rings hollow and violates the very idea of Superman itself.

The messages telegraphed about Superman in this movie is all over the place. Alfred (Jeremy Irons) spouts two opposing opinions on Superman at two different times. Also, at one time Clark Kent/Superman talks about how he wants to do good and save people to honor his father, while in my recollection Pa Kent basically told him in MoS (I exaggerate, but still), “Don’t save the humans, they don’t deserve it.” It’s clear that the movie itself isn’t sure on how to handle Superman. Also, Henry Cavill’s acting that only ranges from brooding to grimacing (coupled with Snyder’s obsession of having Superman suspended mid air to hammer-in the idea that he is a god), just worsens it all.

How about other characters? Jessie Eisenberg’s Lex Luthor, that one I can’t understand. The less I can say about him the better, so I’m actually gonna chalk it out to taste. Perhaps, his Lex Luthor just isn’t my taste. One thing I know for sure though, his character is as annoying and as perplexing as he appeared in the trailers, so if you hate him there you’ll want to burn him in the actual movie.

I don’t have any special thing to say about Wonder Woman (Gal Gadot). She doesn’t have much to do in BvS (yet. She’s having her own movie and she’ll also appear in upcoming Justice League movie) and doesn’t have much time to build her character, so I can’t say anything worthwhile yet. I’m not fond of her costume from practical perspective, but that’s hardly the worst thing in BvS.

Alright, maybe you’re thinking, what if I only want to watch the movie only for the action? I’d just warn you that any kind of action only begins halfway into the movie (probably maybe even way into the third act), and the ride leading to it was excruciating. Even the titular fight between Batman and Superman is wildly lackluster, purely because of the fact that you just know how stupid it is. When you want to avoid a fight, definitely the first thing you do won’t be throwing your supposed opponent 10-feet into a building. When you don’t have time to talk, then you shouldn’t have time to keep saying you don’t have time to talk. The conclusion of the fight is also pretty stupid ("Martha," anyone?). To tell you the truth, the titular fight really is boring. The final fight, featuring Wonder Woman, is slightly better, but only if you like those kinds of heavily CGI’d fight.

The story itself is incomprehensible. Fortunately there’s something resembling a plot, but it has no apparent arc aside from the obvious question the writers ask themselves: HOW DO WE GET BATMAN TO FIGHT SUPERMAN. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is not what a good writer should do. Obviously, there’s a certain kind of art about a movie that builds quite and slow suspense that leads to a satisfying climax. Some movies though, just draaaaags, and BvS is the latter. I’m not a person with the shortest attention span and I certainly don’t need an explosion every 5 minutes to keep me engaged, but I just couldn’t care for BvS and I was bored. out. of. my. mind. With clunky pacing, disjointed edits, and worthless dream sequences, BvS is basically an incoherent rambling of Zack Snyder.

While we’re here, let’s talk about the title. “Batman v Superman” doesn’t really mean anything outside the court of law, which certainly has nothing to do with the movie. Even “Dawn of Justice” is kinda meaningless unless if you think it’s a clever enough pun for Justice League. And since the movie does not talk about the actual justice itself, and certainly doesn’t end in any way that implies justice is served, it simply is a misnomer. Basically the title was just a collection of things that Snyder thinks would sound cool, which ironically is a fitting description of the entire movie.

Honestly, the only thing I liked about this movie is the fact that practically anybody could figure out who Superman is; because when your disguise is a pair of glasses, then you’re not really trying to fool anyone.

My TL;DR is this: Do yourself a favor and skip this movie. Just watch literally anything else; Kung Fu Panda 3, Nolan’s Batman Trilogy, Supergirl, your high school graduation video, anything. Treat yourself with a decent lunch. Just don’t pay for this movie, unless you’re prepared to be disappointed.

Henry Cavill sending a cryptic message 🤔😊😃😊😃

Henry sending a cryptic message 🤔😄

I believe in truth. But I’m also a big fan of justice.

BATMAN V. SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE

Wonder Woman & Superman

Emmet O'Brien takes on Superman.

Here is my review of Man of Steel. I've made it pretty much spoiler free but still approach with caution if you're trying to stay uninformed before the film is released!

used here↗️

“Meet and Greet”

An Henry Cavill x Reader x Jungkook fanfic, don't like, don't read please! MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, THIS WORK OF FICTION CONTAINS SEXUAL THEMES.

A/N: okay this is credited to my friend who gave me the brainworm of Henry Cavill and Jungkook together as Calvin Klein models and my brain overloaded so here we go a smutshot of Dom Henry, Sub Reader and Sub Jungkook. This is like my first ever legitimate work I'm posting anywhere so take this with a grain of salt.

Word count: 2209

Warnings: MLM, Blow job, fingering (M, W receiving), Facial cumshot, Eiffel towering, squirting, riding, pussy eating, I think that's it.

Jungkook's eyes rolled back in his head as the assault of his prostate continues, each thrust, dragged the cock deeper and deeper in his walls. Opening his tear soaked lashes, his eyes fell on his girlfriend, sitting on The Superman actor's face, Henry William Daligesh Cavill's face, moaning wantonly

.………………………………………………........................

The fan meet was in full swing, the fact Jungkook was even able to attend this justice league meet and greet was a big deal. He was always so busy, the tours, shows, practices and new recordings. Your boyfriend barely had time to breathe. Your personal love life was getting bland too. This was such a awesome day for you both. Meeting childhood Superheroes in reality.In particular, Henry Cavill. That man was your first crush, first celebrity love and everything and who hadn't had a crush on that man? Even your boyfriend wasn't immune to him. He was vibrating out of skin from the sheer excitement.

“Jungkook? You alright,love?” you whispered to him.

“I don't think I'm straight anymore, look at his arms-” he got cut off by your choked laughter.

“You both are the ideal threesome, you know?” your eyes shone with mischievous motives and his face flushed.

As the one on one meet and greet started, you both stood up in your line so that Jungkook was right behind you. Each actor was actually so sweet, Jason Momoa, had teasingly even called you a goddess because of your beauty and complimented you on your pretty dress. Jungkook was even flirted with, he was so red as Gal Gadot not only called him a walking biohazard but also checked him out from head to toe.

The final man as you moved on from Ben Affleck was Henry, he had looked over to you as you moved to sit infront of him, he looked downright delicious in the rolled up sleeves of denim shirt and jeans. If there's a man under the sky who can pull off denim on denim, it'd be hundred percent him.

“Hello, Mr. Cavill. I'm ____” He clasped your hand in his, his hand dwarfed yours.

“Just Henry for a pretty one like you.” your face flushed.

“Thank you, you're very good looking too,Henry” His smile was charming, and his eyes held an undercurrent of something dark.

“Say _____, I was wondering, after this meet and greet, I was gonna head out for a drink. Maybe you'd like to join me.” His pupils had turned a little more blown out. Your face was doing an impressive job of cosplaying a tomato.

“Um, I have- uh- actually- I have a boyfriend. The one behind me talking to Ben Affleck." His smile faltered a little.

“Ah. Shame. You're too pretty for your own good. Let him treat you nicely. What does he do?”

“He's a musician, a Korean celebrity. He's from BTS.” Henry's eyes widened a little, and his eyebrows almost disappeared in his hairline.

“Oh? Wow, that's amazing. I've always wanted to meet that band, I like their songs, you're telling he's up next? Which one is he? The leader? RM?” your heart fluttered little at how nice he was.

“The youngest, Jungkook. I've been dating him for about 2 years now” His beaming smile widened.

“A very beautiful, hot and sexy couple you'd make. I gotta confess something come closer-” you move closer and his breath tickled your ear, sending goosebumps all over your neck and arms. “-I always had a little crush on him from when I discovered their music back in 2020” Your eyes almost bulged out of their sockets.

“You're into?” His lips tugged up slightly and he nodded. “Proudly Bi, just haven't came out to the public yet.” You smacked a hand on your mouth.

“Quick question, you can say no if you want-” His left eyebrow lifted up. “-would you like to, you know, like, um- uh- deep breaths _____ come on. Would you like to come back with me and Jungkook both? To our hotel?-” You held your breath as he looked at you with his blown out blue eyes and then looked over to your boyfriend engaged in a very animated conversation with the Batman actor, he checked out Jungkook with so much heat in his eyes that you shivered in your seat, squirming slightly.

“I'll take you up on that offer, _____ can I get your number? I'll call you after I'm done here.” His eyes promised deep satisfaction as you scribbled down your number on his arm discreetly, and moved on and down the stage, watching Jungkook take the seat all while squirming and blushing. Today is going to be fucking amazing.

......………………………………………………...................

“_____! HE WAS FLIRTING WITH ME- I'M GONNA FUCKING DIE-” Jungkook whines pushing his face into your shoulder. You wondered if telling him that the man he's currently dying over is coming over later to fuck you both 7 ways into the next Sunday would be too much.

Putting the key in your room to access the power, you turned on the light. “Baby, you should go shower, someone's coming over afterwards.” Jungkook's confused face looked at you, waiting for further explanation.

“It's quite literally your ideal man. Henry Cavill, himself is coming over. Don't you wanna fuck Superman? Hmm?” You words made Jungkook shiver, blood rushing down between his legs and they wobbled as his body slumped down on to a chair in the middle of the living room of the suite.

“You- The Henry Cavill? Um? Like the man, the entire World is gay for and women would die for? He IS COMING?????? _____! Oh my god-” He looked overwhelmed but the slight chub in his pants told you just how much excited he is at the prospect of having you and The Superman for the night.

“Go shower, I'll shower too. Shoo now, Jagiya.” He scrambled out on wobbly legs and into a bathroom just as you step inside another one.

You had given Henry your suite number and hotel name before leaving and gotten a little startled, as you saw him in your living space as you entered wearing a bathrobe. Jungkook stumbles in after you and gasped at the sight of Henry lounging on the sofa with a few top buttons of his denim shirt undone giving a peek at his chest hair and cut collar bones. His smirk made you realise that he understood exactly where both you and your boyfriend were looking at.

“So who's the Dom and Sub between the both of you?” His dark smouldering eyes paired with the smile promising nothing but lust made your head foggy. Jungkook wasn't faring much better because at Henry's words Jungkook whimpered unconsciously.

“Both.” His eyebrow lifted up.

“We're Versatile. Both of us.” Jungkook mumbled through his embarassment.

“Isn't that just bloody lovely.” He stood up and walked over to both of you instantly reminding you of your nakedness and how dressed he was. Jungkook was literally in a tiny hotel towel.

“Let's lay down some ground rules, alright? The stop light system. Red for stop, Yellow for slow or a minute and Green for go, clear?” Both of us nodded, Jungkook was swaying on his feet a little with his enthusiasm.

“If your mouth is occupied, 3 taps for green, 2 for yellow, and 1 for red. Alright?” your face flushed at the implications. Both of your heads bopped down in a nod.

“What about condoms? I'm clean, got my tests done a week ago, haven't been with anyone.” He looked calm and collected unlike you two, increasingly becoming more and more red with each word from him.

“No please, wanna feel you both.” You whisper as Jungkook eagerly gave his consent. Henry's smiled almost turned predatory and he laughed. A deep rich and smooth baritone floated into the air.

“Great, Come here _____.” Henry pulled you onto his lap and his mouth crushed yours in a bruising kiss. He kissed like he looked, full of dominance, power and somehow sheer elegance. Leaving your swollen lips he pulled Jungkook down by his towel on his other thigh, the one unoccupied by your frame. Weaving his free hand into Jungkook's hair, he captured Jungkook in a feral kiss as well and you could clearly see the outline of Jungkook's excitement underneath his towel as his mouth gets utterly ruined but Henry's tongue. When Jungkook was spared from Henry's assault on his lips, he looked like a wreck, his dick continuously twitching underneath his towel and his breathing coming out in pants.

“Bedroom?” His voice made Jungkook whine and you moaned. A chorus of Yes please! rang out as both of you rushed to the master bedroom in the suite as Henry leisurely followed the two of you, unbuckling his belt as he walked. Your mouth went dry as he popped open the button and unzipped his jeans. The bulge in his underwear made your mouth water, you heard Jungkook's breath catch in his throat.

“Who wants to suck me off and who wants to sit on my face?” his deep voice punched out an involuntary whimper out of you both. “I want- I want to suck you- please, sir?” God Jungkook looked so pathetic staring at Henry with his big doe eyes, begging to have his mouth stuffed to the brim. “Fuck bunny, you look like a bunny, can I call you that?” his voice was raspy and thick with desire. “Yes, yes sir. I'll be your bunny” you stared in awe as Jungkook fell down at his knees near the bed and Henry walked over sitting down on the edge of the bed while accomodating Jungkook between his legs. ……………………………………………….........................

And that's how you both ended up here, with Jungkook split open on Henry's dick as you ride his nose and tongue, crying for mercy.

“Agh-sIR! Too much! TOO MUCH! PLEASE- can't fuck- it hurts- no-no more! Plea-AH-” your voice broke mid sentence as two of his thick digits bullied their way into your swollen folds joining his tongue's merciless assault on you puffy clit. His chin and throat was drenched in your essence due to the sheer amount of orgasms you already had experienced on his perfect face.

Jungkook wasn't faring any better, each brutal thrust punching out an almost feral moan out of the idol's throat. “Hen-SIR! Yes- yes right there! Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me- please please PLEASE! Use me! I can't I'm gonna cum, you're- mhm-ah-AGH- my prostate- NGH-!!!!” He squeals as his body was forced into another orgasm, ropes of cum shooting out of his red, sensitive tip onto Henry's happy trail and abs. Henry groans into your swollen dripping pussy as Jungkook clamps down on to his dick like vice, whimpering because of overstimulation.

“I'm gonna squirt, HENRY- Jungkook! Sir- oh- ah! Fucking GOD, OH- my pussy is gonna break, I can't! I'm gonna- nah- ah- fuck fuck fuck-” your pussy contracts one last before the dam in your lower belly breaks and jets of clear liquid gushes out of cunt in spurts, soaking Henry's entire lower face and chest.

Both you and Jungkook collapse against each other over Henry body as he gently maneuvers both of you off of him. As you open your bleary eyes, they fell on his painful erection, Henry hadn't cum yet.

You nudged Jungkook and the both of you pushed him down, each straddling a thigh. Henry let of a small gasp as you got to work. Leaning down and taking his leaking tip into your mouth, a moan was ripped from Henry's mouth. Jungkook shuffled around for sometime and produced the open bottle of lube that was used earlier to prep him into taking Henry's thick cock. He drizzled some onto his fingers before his tongue joined you in smothering Henry's dick.

“Oh-oh fuck bunny. Princess, your throat feels divine-” He pushed one of his arms to cover his face as the other threaded itself into your hair. There was another loud moan from Henry as Jungkook pushed his finger into his tight heat. The warmth on his cock and balls from two very eager mouths as well the pressure on his prostate from the prying fingers made Henry's head spin. His volume was rising, moans and groans falling from his lips as his hips moved on their own, chasing the heat while simultaneously pushing his ass towards the fingers abusing his sweet spot.

“Shit shit shit, fuck- off off- I'm gonna cum, darlings- pull off pull off- Jesus Christ- FUCK-” Thick ropes of cum shot out his twitching dick as his thighs shake and hips continue to thrust minutely. The cum streaks painted both your and your boyfriend's face and all three of your hearts continue to race.

“Wow, Kryptonian stamina wasn't a joke, holy shit-” Henry busted out laughing at Jungkook's joke.

“Now think about Yoongi hyung, who wrote gay fanfics in highschool, finding about his maknae, getting plowed to oblivion by the Superman himself-” you stopped at the grimace on Jungkook's face as Henry started wheezing.

After a while, Henry had cleaned all three of you with a wet towel before tucking you two into the bed and then getting in himself, succumbing to the post orgasmic blissful sleep.

:)

♥

♡

♥

Ohh yeah!!! There is another one. Be sure to check it out and tell me what you think.

If people who touch or poke Superman can make impressions in his skin (I just watched the bath scene in Batman V Superman, don’t judge me), does that mean every time he gets punched or shot at, he just kinda jiggles...? Is there a jiggling going on...?

I must know if Superman jiggles!

If he comes with settings, does that mean I can buy him in bulk?

Why is he like this?

The Gentlemen (2020) || The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)

HENRY CAVILL × MUSCLETECH ∟The Anthem - Strength Redefined Should it matter which came first? Does resilience lead to strength, or is it strength that breeds resilience? Have you discovered these two pillars yet?, Or perhaps you are still looking for both, so you could face your challenges head on. We all know that life is full of unexpected and unimaginable hurdles they come at you from all corners and no one is exempt, but resilience lives in all of us just waiting to be harnessed. When you discover what you’re made of-potential, persistence, dedication and determination, then you’ll already know you were born resilient and already have the mental strength to handle whatever challenge life throws at you. There may be days when you feel the heaviest thing you lift is your head but will you, will you find your character, to pursue your dreams, to learn, to give, to be better not only for yourself but for everyone. Because life takes more than just muscle. Life takes strength.

IMMORTALS (2011) dir.  Tarsem Singh

Ugh, is Season 2 ready yet. Need me some tasty Geralt in my life 🤤

Geralt

The Witcher

...I’ve got some ideas! (This ended up kind of long...oops)

Okay, so the six books in the Enola Holmes series cover events over one year. I don’t think the movie will cover nearly that much time, so I think it will cover only the case from the first book (The Case of the Missing Marquess) and then it will end with the resolution from the sixth book in the series - perhaps with scenes from the other books sprinkled in.

There’s also going to be a number of things that are different from the books - in the books, Enola is not trained to fight, while in the movie she clearly is. In the books, Enola and her mother are not that close, but in the movie they clearly are - although, giving Helena Bonham Carter more screen time is certainly not something I’d complain about. Another major thing that might have plot ramifications is that in the books, Enola runs away before Mycroft can send her off to boarding school. Meanwhile, the trailer clearly shows scenes of Enola at boarding school, so the means of her escape are going to be different in the movie.

In the books, The Case of the Missing Marquess is actually one of the simplest that Enola solves - probably because it’s the first book, and so a great deal of it is taken up with exposition rather than mystery-solving. In the movie, I expect they’ll change that up and make the case more complicated and dramatic. Viscount Tewksbury (i.e. the marquess who went missing), who is introduced in the trailer as a blond teenager on a train, plays a very minor role in the books - also, in the books, he’s twelve. The trailer suggests that his role will be significantly expanded in the movie.

One thing that did bother me a bit about the trailer is that Enola disguises herself as a boy in it. There is nothing inherently wrong with that, but in the books, she makes it a bit of a point of pride that she never disguises herself as male - for a couple reasons: one, she knows it is what her brothers will expect her to do, and she is trying to hide from them; and two, in the many ridiculous accoutrements of female fashion, Enola conceals money, candies, other bits and bobs, and her knife. In the books, Enola disguises herself as a widow, a nun, a secretary, an assistant, a scholar woman, a street-seller, an orphan girl, and, as shown in the trailer, a high-born lady. I think it will be something of a pity if the movie forgoes all those many disguises and uses only the disguises of a boy and a lady.

Also, in the books, Enola is largely solitary and mostly works alone, though she occasionally teams up with Sherlock. The movie, it seems, will be giving her some companions. I think that will be fun, but it will kind of reduce one of the books’ main arcs - that Enola can and will do very well on her own.

All in all, I think the movie will be fun to watch and will stay true to the spirit of the books, but the plot of the mystery will be different than anything already present in print. I think it probably would have been more effective to make this a TV series in order to cover more of the story and character development, but what’s done is done. I think the actors will do a marvelous job - I am really looking forward to how Millie Bobby Brown and Henry Cavill portray Enola’s and Sherlock’s sibling relationship.

Some scenes that I hope would show up in the movie in one form or another, but that I think will probably get left out:

when Florence Nightingale gives Sherlock Holmes a piece of her mind

when Enola bursts into Dr. Watson’s home looking for help dressed as a nun and covered in blood, and Watson and Holmes think that she is injured until she whips a bloody knife out of her bodice

when Enola hides from her brother in his own flat, knowing it is the last place he would think to look (actually, I think this one might very well show up in the movie - at 1:00 in the trailer looks like it could be the scene I am referring to, but I can’t tell for sure)

when Enola throws a cat at Sherlock in order to create a distraction and slip out unnoticed

when Enola bumps into Mycroft and kicks him in the shin to get away

when John Watson tells Enola (while she is disguised) that he is worried for Sherlock, as he seems quite distressed over his missing sister

When Mycroft and Sherlock post an ad in the classifieds asking Enola to come home, and she replies: To M.H. and S.H. Rot. E.H.

When Mycroft bursts in to stop a wedding, claiming the bride is an imposter, and Enola rips off her veil, shouts at him, throws off the dress and runs out the door

(also, try this link to download an EPUB copy of that second book, The Case of the Left-Handed Lady.)

I read the Enola Holmes series in one afternoon like two years ago, and I really enjoyed it! I’m excited for this movie. I’m sure some things that I liked in the books will be missing, since that’s just the way of movies, but I really think I’m going to like this movie anyway!

I’m gonna re-read the series before I watch it though. 

(Also Henry Cavill is playing Sherlock?? So Superman is joining Iron Man and Dr.Strange in being Sherlock Holmes and I think that’s fun)

I read the Enola Holmes series in one afternoon like two years ago, and I really enjoyed it! I’m excited for this movie. I’m sure some things that I liked in the books will be missing, since that’s just the way of movies, but I really think I’m going to like this movie anyway!

I’m gonna re-read the series before I watch it though. 

(Also Henry Cavill is playing Sherlock?? So Superman is joining Iron Man and Dr.Strange in being Sherlock Holmes and I think that’s fun)