Only Friends - Blog Posts

What if Ray is the one who finds Mew's change problematic after he gets over Mew that is. right now he's too blind to see what's happening. ray didn't fall for this new, he fell for his mew, the one who saved him. This one looks like someone who will leave him to die after using him. Maybe this is what gives Ray an epiphany and he finally sees sand. but at that point sand is done with him , so ray goes after him but sand doesn't want to anything with him ( understandable) and then we get the line from the trailer. i am not going to let you go after you have come into my life.

maybe in the middle of this comes the boeing plot , ( that chekhovs gun has to fire sometime ) and ray getting jealous, and ray going berserk on sand, claiming ownership. and sand is like I can choose aka do you think I don't have any dignity ?

what if mew goes back to top and ray finds out, but he's not that mad as he taught he will be , hes mad but he's more mad when he sees sand with boring. hes mad, sad, confused and on top of that he's drunk and high, maybe this scenario could be what gives clarity to ray on who he actually likes. except this is going to happen towards the ned of the show and sand has moved on and we don't get a raysand ending, then what I am I going to do.

( i would be happy if ray goes to rehab instead and sand stays away but the heart wants what it wants)

Mew trying to become Ray let alone date him was not on my bingo card for this week but I'm no professional bingo card designer, let's talk about this anyway

We all went into this show knowing it was going to be messy, asking for it to be messy, we're all weak for SandRay so RayMew is upsetting because we want Ray with Sand, sure, but setting all of that aside, the thing that is really concerning to me about the fact that Mew is choosing to rebound with Ray is the fact that he is very creepily BECOMING RAY while doing it. He's putting on a persona to handle his life right now and it's really unhealthy and boy needs to cut it out and get some therapy. (they all need therapy.)

At the beginning of the episode, before the confrontation with Boston, Mew is dressed more or less as himself. He and Ray do dress similarly on a base level- they both wear a lot of patterned, unbuttoned shirts over a second shirt, but Mew normally wears stripes over tshirts, and mostly light colours with a lot of blues and greens. Ray wears a lot of darker colours and patterns with shapes and designs, with a lot of reds, tans, and oranges.

After blasting Boston into the pool and delivering one of the most satisfying kicks on television, before going for his confrontation with Nick, we get the creepy tub shot of Mew sinking into his misery and his upcoming revenge era-

To put on his Ray cosplay, he's gotta sink down into the deep. This isn't a rebirth or an emergence of a new, stronger version of himself; this is him descending, covering himself and his hurt with someone else's aura and attitude so that he can cope with the path he's decided he needs to go on to burn his enemies and get his revenge.

He tries it out when he goes to see Nick and it works for him-

This is his soft launch, where he's up against someone else who has, or feels he has, been done wrong by Boston and Top (and done wrong, obviously) but that Mew knows is vulnerable. Mew pushes on Nick to help getting his revenge on Boston, and Nick crumbles. Using this persona, this attitude, is working for him.

He uses it to hunt down Gap next, another trial run, that goes flawlessly for him as well.

He's got the black tank, the necklace, and a black, white, and grey shirt this time, another test of borrowed confidence. And he's successful: he pulls Gap with almost no effort, he gets the file, he's ready to go now. He's used the Ray based persona twice with people he doesn't know, his confidence is up, which means he's ready to use it on someone he does know.

So when he gets ready to confront Boston, we get a whole sequence of him preparing for the battle, and checking all the details. There's a lot of very close up shots of his face and eyes here that I left out of the gifs because this scene was already long, and a lot of focus on each detail.

The necklace like Ray wears, a tanktop like Ray wears (but black! because this is Mew in his angsty villain era!), a patterned button up shirt like Ray wears, check the hair and go. Armored with this other persona, he's ready to handle Boston, and he does. Much, much better than Ray himself, mind you, compared to when Ray went and confronted Boston in the last episode.

The next big outfit switch we get for Mew in this episode (I'm not counting the whole big Top punching Mew confrontation since Mew and Ray are both just wearing their school clothes there) is Top's daydream about dancing with Mew. This whole sequence is so soft focus and Top looks so sad and there's no one else there which implies to me he's imagining this and it's not an actual memory, but either way we're back to Mew in stripes, with Top in stripes as well.

What's different about Mew and Top matching versus Mew matching himself to Ray? Mew and Top don't really MATCH so much as coordinate. They're often in different colours, different styles, different material shirts, etc. Like here, Mew is wearing an unbuttoned dress shirt with vertical stripes over a tshirt, while Top is wearing a collared polo shirt with horizontal stripes, AND they're wearing different colours. They work together without fully matching, and they're distinct to the characters as well. Even when their styles get a little closer, like Top wearing some solid colour button up shirts in episode 6 instead of polo shirts, he styles them differently than Mew does and I at least can't really picture them switching clothes and having the outfits really look right.

Meanwhile, the last scene of the episode, with Mew dancing with Ray, we get this-

Mew is dressed as Ray again, even shifting into Ray's common colour schemes with the flowers on this one. His first outfit when he went to see Nick was a trial and the pattern still had a lot of blues in it, but he's been shifting into darker colours with the tans and oranges we see Ray in pretty often with this.

(Ray, meanwhile, is wearing a shirt that looks like something Sand would have chosen for him, of course.)

Ray is reckless, Ray is fearless, Ray is bold, Ray is confident, Ray is wild and sometimes unpredictable, or he at least seems to be to the much more conservative Mew, so slipping into Ray's clothes and taking on what he thinks is Ray's persona is a way for Mew to push himself in ways he hasn't before. There's no way Mew could have handled his whole spy mission to get the video file from Gap as himself the way he has been; that's not in his wheelhouse.

From the preview for next week it looks like Mew is sliding into more of Ray's persona with the partying behaviors, and I don't think it's going to end well for him. But being with Top has taught him that trying to get someone to change is useless because they're still the same mess on the inside, so his decision to slide down the same path as Ray and let go of his inhibitions instead of trying to fix Ray is as unsurprising as it is self-destructive.

Seeing Mew take some kind of power over his life should have been satisfying, and in some ways it definitely was, like watching him burn the notebook page and try to put his foot down with Top, but then seeing him do it while spiraling mentally and slowly covering himself with Ray's outward persona at the same time was incredibly unnerving. Adding in him deciding to get involved with Ray romantically and it just speed ratchets up the unhealthy factor by a million miles a minute.

It also shows how well Mew actually knows Ray now compared to how well he thinks he knows Ray and who and what he thinks Ray is, that he could send himself down this path without seeing the writing on the wall about who Ray is trying to be and what Ray is trying to deal with behind Ray's substance abuse problems and everything else, but I imagine that will be part of the inevitable explosion that THIS impending disaster will also turn into, potentially very soon.

You can't fix your problems by pretending to be someone that you're not, especially if who you're trying to be is someone you know who is incredibly problematic and unhealthy themselves. It's a whole toxic situation even BEFORE you start trying to DATE THEM AT THE SAME TIME.

We wanted a mess and boy are we getting it.

At this point anything else other than death is a happy ending for him

I don't think Only Friends will have a sad ending, not for Ray and Sand, at least.

I think it won't be like that because Ray's life is already so damn tragic and sad and I can't imagine ANY kind of sad ending that, at the same time, could leave the audience satisfied, if Ray's fate were to suffer more, even worse if it were to be a type of suffering that would see him completely alone, with no one in his life. And I don't even want to dare think about his possible death.

"Only Friends" is a very, very intense and in some ways, dark BL but based on the experience I've had watching other BLs, I have that tiny hope that at least Ray will find his happiness.

And perhaps this will apply to all the boys. Why not? Life is hard enough, at least in dramas we deserve a happy ending.

Sandray and why they are the The good thing at the wrong time, or the right person at the wrong time.

So i have read a lot of amazing meta on this series, especially the ephemarilty squad and it has made the viewer experience so much better. A big thank you to those people.

This post is technically not a meta nor am I claiming this is something groundbreaking. I just wanted to get my thoughts out.

Only friends has been an experience and my favourite couple is sandray. I know it will only give me pain but i am a masochist.

After episode five, I have seen a lot of people start to put blame on either sand or ray or Boston ( who is at 80% fault). But in this series we can't just easily put them in a blame box. It's way to complicated for that, as emotions are.

Ep 5 is from the perspective of sand while ep 4 was from ray, from these two eps we realise how different they are, how different their experiences are.

Ray is not exactly a mature person or even a put together person like sand. And we know why, he has self esteem issues, depression and is an alcoholic due to childhood circumstances. And he does not have a supportive network. And we can't blame the friends group because they are twenty something college kids who have no idea of the seriousness. Case in point, how they wave off rays talks of being a burden and continues to enable his bad habits. He is an incredibly messy character, with clear trauma and we have given enough points, explicitly told through the narrative. We are supposed to feel sympathy for him, we are supposed to feel empathy for him. We should root for him to become better.

Compare that with Boston. Boston has been given implied issues, acted out brilliantly by neo. Now whether they are some deep rooted issues from his childhood or parents or others, we dont know. Cause we are not explicitly told. We are supposed to be see him as the antagonist.

In the case of ray, we have given reason to believe that mew is not a great friend to ray as he claims to be. So we are not supposed to root for them so then who should we root for.

Enter sand, who's practically perfect, put together, mature and hot. But the problem is sand is not a put together person, at all.

Sand juggles between jobs, he takes care of the debt of his mother and is a good son. But he's in need of money and he has told that he will do anything to get more money. Aka his illegal plum business.

Ep 5 gives us mote depth of his character. And from the outside he looks cool, calm and collected, inwardly sand is an emotional person, who's driven by his emotions. Now from the first eps we were led to believe that ray is the emotional drunkard looking for trouble. He's not. Ray is driven by his trauma, his addiction, his thoughts, not his emotions.

Sand on the other hand is quick to anger, sarcastic to the point that someone has probably tried to punch him and has a rigid moral sense. And he wants to take care of stuff. And he falls fast. But he doesn't know how to deal with them.

Sand has gotten hurt before by way of top. And he keeps his emotional walls up. Ray is lonely, he wants to connect. And a lot of people have said that he doesn't know to connect but he does. Everything he does with sand is that, he's forging a connection.

Ray was the one who initiated every one of their interactions, even if it was done in an annoying manner. And sand doesn't give a rigid boundary he immediately gives into ray.

And this connection has already been formed, entirely initiated by ray and its strong. To the point that sand has fallen hard and has already given a designated time for ray.

But they are not in the same page. Sand has told ray that he wants to just be FWB and ray has agreed to that. And while we have seen clear signs from both of then that they like each other, I don't thing they are getting it. There understanding level is clearly marred with their issues, sand with being a second choice and ray with everything.

But they have shown that they can communicate. So why are they not communicating now. Because sand has put up the boundary of FWB. No amount of mooning and looking sad is going to tell ray that he wants to be boyfriends. He has to be explicitly told and sand has to do that.

Ray should also be clear with want he wants. Verbally. But both of them are not in a place of mind to do that. And that is surprising, because we could have expected that from the put together one. Expect sand is dealing with his issues and is unwilling to try , because of the threat of heartbreak and is letting his emotions get the better of him.

On the contrary, in rp 5 , ray seems more calm. He is actually trying, he's connecting with sand with doing the things that he loves. He's falling for sand and I think he does know.

Even after being drunk and high he has the werewithal to open up a conversation, he gave the chance to sand to try. But sand rejected it. That was a big chance and if sand had taken that chance, they could have talked about their current situation. That's what's so heartbreaking about it, because the possibility was there. I mean look at him here.

He clearly wanted him to talk to him.

Expect sand didn't take it, his problems prevented him from doing it, his emotions which were going overbroad prevented him from thinking rationally.

And ray took that rejection, personally. We can easily infer what went through his mind from what we already know ," I am a burden, I am a jinx". "I have tried my best but it's not working, So why should I try more", aka the devastating happy birthday.

Ray was rational at that moment, and dare I say mature, especially considering the scene that happened just before that. Ray was able to think above his emotions and give a rational way out of that predicament. But sand rejection triggered his trauma and he went back to square one.

There was a beautiful post about different types of understanding in this series. That's what is happening here, different types of understanding. But I can't find that post.

At that point both needed to understand the other but there individual issues left them unable to do it. And it's not anyone's fault. It's not a blame game. It's the reality of trauma situations.

How trauma and mental health issues can create problems, can make situations seem bigger then they actually are. How it made two people who are compatible with each other be reluctant to go further.

They can be the perfect couple the audience want them to be. But at this point of time , they are the right person at the wrong time archetype.

And they will remain if they don't communicate. Let's hope by the end of the messiness they both have some clarity on how to go further. And give the audience an emotionally charged story.

Guys we finally got what we wanted and we're not talking about it enough

I'm seeing people talk about dream female Only Friends cast and now I cannot stop thinking about my perfect Ray and Sand: Pat Chayanit and Fah Yongwaree.

(x)(x)

I just know Pat can do both Ray's annoying, rich boy vibes and also all the emotional nuance and depth.

(x)(x)

And I'm picturing Fah in a look similar to Jean from The Warp Effect, I think she would make a perfect Sand.

(x)(x)

We already know they work well together and have a nice chemistry.

And I know they can also pull off the heartwrenching and emotional scenes.

(x)(x)

rooftop kisses will be the end of me

A lot of people in the fandom were mad at Sand for not drawing the line right away and sorta slumbering through Boeing's entire slut agenda but folks

As someone who identifies so strongly with Sand as a character I was happy to see Ray step up and claim him so shamelessly, so confidently. Because saviors also need saving sometimes, and this was the reassurance Sand needed. This was Ray proving he was all in and not only for his own sake. Sure Sand should have established boundaries right away but damn it give him a break. It was meh morally but it was okay, it was understandable. He's got issues of his own, he is not there just to serve Ray's arc

Ray is like "Oh yeah my boyfriend is still in love with his ex" after watching Sand go into complete autopilot and giving the most dead fish kiss to Boeing

Like bro he kissed you right after that and it was like he was deprived of oxygen and you were his oxygen mask

Thank you to Sand for being my role model

He's someone I relate to very much and I see so much of my romantic tendencies in him

Only he does draw boundaries. He does have self-respect. He refuses to give up his integrity

Thank you so much maybe I do have a chance at a fulfilling relationship

I am not ready for anyone's opinions honestly, but I just have to say this: as someone who has an alcoholic sibling, there is only so much you can do to stop an addict.

I mean, the friend group is shitty. I don't see the love or loyalty one expects from a friend group. Frankly, I don't think any of them have ever taken Ray's addiction seriously, but we do not know if they ever tried to help.

At some point you become exhausted. At some point, you realize the person you care about will not quit if they don't want to.

And Ray does have agency. He did not have to bring drugs to the party. His dellusions explain his behavior but do not justify it.

I'm very angry with Ray this week I'm sorry. This show is hitting too close to home

Next week's preview makes next week worth living

Only I hate the fact that Sand is the one confessing. I hate it. He deserves to be confessed to. He deserves to be chased after. Ray needs to fucking repent because he's fucked up so many times and Sand needs to be less forgiving

I am so normal about Sand it's not like I relate to him or anything

Many people in the fandom are convinced that SandRay won't get a happy ending because it's 'not a bl' and it's 'realistic'. First of all, even I, the resident hopeless romantic, understand that realism is not the same as pessimism. Second of all, it's P'Jojo we're talking about. He loves giving people happy endings after a couple of tragic twists and time jumps. Just think about Bad Buddy or Never Let Me Go and their endings. I am a SandRay-is-endgame truther, because of the reasons listed above and because I will bawl my eyes out in the case they don't end up together.

Today is the day

The day a new episode of only friends comes out

The only thing that kept me afloat for the entire week

If I don't get some resolution to SandRay's fight I will drown my sorrows in soju

Actually everything on tumblr is about Ray and Sand from only friends

I love characters that think they can't allow themselves to love or be loved

just to have someone stride into their life to turn that concept upside down

GMMTV really decided to produce a show which on the surface level is about messy queers fucking the brains out of each other but on the deeper level is really about the power dynamics in queer relationships and how important having control is for so many people

it's the way Top is used to having the upper hand, but in his new relationship it's Mew who has control

it's the way Sand is so afraid of losing control over his own emotions in his relationship with Ray, but he's bound to catch feelings, we all know it

it's the way Boston doesn't get attached to anyone but loses control in his pursuit of Top

it's all about who's got the power, who protected their heart the best

okay but this LOOK

the look after Ray asked Sand if he found him attractive

First I applaud you for mastering the "trying to remain calm and collected while being horny" face

I can't believe I didn't pick up on it in the first episode but Mew is such a proficient manipulator for someone so young and inexperienced. He likes having control, and I'm surprised Top is actually sticking around. He must be so sure of himself his confidence makes him blind to Mew's tricks. Either that or it makes the challenge more interesting and the conquest more gratifying for him, so he's just waiting to take the trophy home.

I am Mew and Mew is me

Seriously, the guy:

1. Doesn't want a one-night stand because he knows he'll fall hard

2. Apologises to the guy he didn't hook up with because you know he got his hopes up and all

3. Brings said guy to a bookshop the next day and talks about his love for reading

4. Is extremely cute and wears glasses

Gmmtv I am gonna sue you for identity theft because what is this

people who discover gay soap operas never go back to western media

my silly little gay shows satisfy my need for queer stories with low stakes zero deaths and a lot of fucking

gmmtv the sponsor of my daily fix of gayness

the fact that RWRB came out the same week on only friends is so fuckin funny to me because people who only watch western media are really so desperate for queer content that ive seen people waxing poetic about so many (non) things meanwhile i'm out here SCREAMING at the top of my lungs because Mark Pakin violated privacy laws to put a sexy selfie onto a customer's phone and WON