I think about the Duga Ending a lot. Not necessarily the more violent one, where Bell tells their allies to head to Duga to set the trap. But the one where Bell chooses not to, says Duga anyways. With no plan.
I think about that action of saying Duga, leading Adler and the others astray—the completely wrong direction, saying nothing and giving nothing away as they sit with Adler in the passenger seat of his car. How Adler trusts Bell wholeheartedly with the answer of Duga. His dog wouldn’t lie. Why would they? They would never.
Bell, who reveals after Woods words and Adler’s coaxing of the truth—if they lied. How Bell just wanted to see their faces of frustration, of anger, of emotion, but they just wanted to see it from Adler. Bell, the epitome of petty revenge with this action—the chance to actually see the arrogant and normally stoic man break. Only to see nothing. No anger. No yelling. Adler who only has a frown and tone to match his disappointment.
Here is the person, the terrorist that led you astray and purposely caused the death of millions just for the chance to see Adler’s anger—only for him to feel disappointed. More how one would feel and look after seeing their pet pee the bed, destroy and tear off your favorite bed sheets—not at the genocide of millions.
I think about the Duga ending a lot. And how even at the end, Adler’s pride at Bell lowered significantly but not angry. How Bell’s petty revenge tasted bittersweet with blood forming at their chest from the shot, with Adler’s scarred frown looking down at them.
I think about how disappointed America’s Monster was at his precious dog that was always supposed to listen, but bit back and decided to die like this. No assault. Just wishing to see their master’s true face. Only to see that their master’s arrogance and pride was always there, Adler’s mistake. His cocky attitude bit back just like Bell did—roaring confidence that the tool he made and took out a piece of himself to do it would betray him like this.
I think about how could it be a betrayal when Bell wasn’t part of the team in the first place. “You’re still one of us, kid.”
I think about the Duga Ending, and all I see is America’s Monster being betrayed and Bell’s momentary confusion how the monster was disappointed more than angry at their gall.
I think. And I think.
And then I think of Solovetsky. I compare.
And all I can see is their relationship always ends in a betrayal in some way or another. The taste in both their mouths being bittersweet, either with blood or just as a natural after taste of killing a piece of your mind or the one who created your mind.
I think about the Duga Ending a lot.
This is the woods and mason dynamic right??? Feels like it
After finishing bo1, bo2 and bocw i have turned into the biggest Hudson apologist ever
Price:"we're after a specially trained individual. Our goal is to apprehend him."
Soap:"okay but what did he do?"
Price:
Price:"shot a CEO."
Soap:"sorry I'm busy"
Ghost:"I'm suddenly blind."
Gaz:"my shoulder is hurt"
Price:
Listen, I know why people like to have Adler and Bell get their own happily ever after where they can be domestic and in love or whatever. I understand the appeal. But man I NEED more of adbell being fucking weird and violent. The line between hate and love is incredibly thin further blurred by all the shit they did to bell's brain. They're enemies but also allies, then enemies again and allies once more. They're old friends, they've only known each other for a few months, they went through hell in Da Nang together, Bell has literally never been to Vietnam, Bell's a highly skilled professional Adler trusts the skills of, Adler literally does not think of bell as a person. And all of these are all mixing and overlapping. Give me the dubiousness of how much of Bell's attraction to Adler is genuinely his own versus how much of it was either accidentally or deliberately imprinted into his brain! If Bell has Adler's memories of Vietnam then part of Bell's personality and psyche is actually Adler's. And if Adler is attracted to Bell then this begs the question of whether or not Adler is actually attracted to Bell or rather to the reflection of himself within Bell?
HELLO??? OP, WHAT WERE YOU ON WHEN WRITING THIS??? I LOVE IT
park, paired with bell! reader. this is based off an anonymous ask i received this month who just wanted a short drabble of this. this is meant to be with a female reader but i feel like i left it neutral enough anyone can read it. adler with reader is there too if you squint.
you hated adler for what he did to you.
he wore you down, molded you from inner thigh to neck; ankle to wrist; knuckle to knee. your life before him might’ve as well been nonexistent, just constant blurs and the struggle to recall your own mother’s face. he stole years, months, and days from you.
hang your head, knees to your chest as you nearly gave out on the world's seemingly shittiest couch or gurney in berlin, every touch and sound a million miles away. your body's newfound love for benzos left you weak and shivering, even with the heater on. followed by painful stomach aches and hallucinations of adler's hand on your cheek or nape of your neck. cigarette smoke from park became a pleasant sensation, keeping her keen eye on you and pressing soft fingers to your pulse every few minutes before she would continue examining whatever was in the boringly beige manila folder. you'd wish someone would ask how you're feeling, just so you could beg for them for something. you were unsure of what you wanted exactly; maybe to o.d. the next time they shoved a needle full of god knows what into your blossoming bruised arm? more of park's hands on you? more of adler's?
"stop that." you weren't aware you were harshly digging and scratching at your arm until she had said something, which felt like more like an echoing command from god rather than a caretaker's "gentle" ask.
of course, you didn't stop because what was park even talking about? in your head, you weren't doing anything, arms crossed and hands still, knees pointing towards her in that flimsy blue gown. she'd have to hold your hand until you fell back under, not cruel enough to restrain someone who was clearly high off ketamine and whatever else mk-ultra supplied the team with to keep you in control. her hands were soft and to you, she smelled like what hybrid violas looked like.
you couldn't pinpoint it but it was grounding enough that through half-lidded eyes, you'd just trace the curves of her face. you felt the same way about park that you did adler but you were gentler in mercy towards her, wanting something more and unidentifiable from her—maybe even as much as you wanted her hands on you again, same as the day as she had to preform cpr on you, ribcage crunching under the hands you mistook for loving and careful.
obligatory doodle
“What’s your favourite scene in attack on titan?”
“Oh probably -”
Well MINE is the scene Reiner and Bertholdt confess but it’s specifically the three seconds after they confess where the sun shines through the clouds and the music swells and it feels like the whole world has stopped and my whole brain reboots and -
I sincerely apologise 😢 (bonus points if Bell wasn't even Russian, just a individual of another nation who happened to be under Soviet rule and basically having to live with Soviet communist ideology and oppressed society, even though inside he knew that life could be better than government could offer, but he couldn't do anything about it, especially when he had a somewhat functioning family at home)
I know that bell was pretty much destined to an early death but that won't stop me from talking about them like a wife who just lost her husband in the war
Tis the season to go all out
it's just... hesh and logan being brought up in religion and hesh relying heavily on it while logan is *very* disconnected from it and hesh praying whenever situations are dire and logan not understanding but tries anyway to be there for hesh and elias gifting the boys rosaries and hesh clinging onto his faith each hour of each day as his family tree crumbles apart and the final straw is when logan gets torn away from him that hesh's faith dwindles until it's nothing but flickering embers because why would a god rip his little brother away from him like that and why must he suffer when he's been good his entire life while logan's faith returns and grows and strengthens because its his only connection to hesh now and hes praying until his knees are raw and hes holding his head in his hands begging god for his big brother again because hes the only man whose ever saved him and it can't end like this