Perhaps A Comedically Large Mallet To The Head Will Save Me

YEAH THERE IS AND IT'S A BABY!!!!!! :( A SMALL FRIEND!!!!

it is normal and healthy to cry over the first live colossal squid footage

sometime i have fully gotten over an childhood interest to the point of almost forgetting it and then i see something completely innocuous related to it one day and then the Obsession™ returns, like a basketball to the face with the only warning being someone far away hollering "heads!" mere seconds before it hits

may i put forth the blue-black grassquit? they are finches and i think they fit his whole celestial aesthetic thing. also they look just black in certain light and most black birds are associated with bad luck

it would be an easy pull to say that if eugene were a bird he’d be a crow or raven (or some variety of finch) BUT i think he’s a common loon due to his mysterious and enigmatic nature and the fact that if any bird could talk to ghosts it would be a common loon (their calls are used in horror movies all the time bc of how creepy they are) and also it kind of suits his general color scheme, plus they have a very “spooky and elegant and beautiful but also dumb as rocks” vibe.

if you were dead set on keeping it in family corvidae (and who could blame you!) i’d say a eurasian magpie due to both the aforementioned color scheme consideration and the fact that magpies seem to display above average levels of both intelligence and empathy and are seen as good or bad luck by various cultures (which i think suits eugene yknow he’s complicated!) and often associated with witchcraft.

if you REALLY want it to be a crow (respectable this isn’t a crow hate page EVER do NOT take that away from this post) i’d go with a hooded crow bc he wears a cloak. thank you all for your time pictures of birds below the cut

i have never been hungover bc im built different but this morning i woke up with a very sharp headache and a general awfulness in my body which feels very reminiscent of how people describe hangovers however i did not drink yesterday, i dressed up as hatsune miku in a silly christmas outfit and hung out in a big room of nerds

Kyaaaa cronenburg miku so kyuuuute

getting a worst enemy who's just some guy sucks bc i want to fist fight this bastard but instead he's just responding to me on google reviews, like a coward

My oil painting of an Uncrustable

"stop muttering to yourself" i'm performing a one man play to a one man audience, i just found out the wife was secretly pregnant from ivf and was having a lesbian affair with the doctor. you stay out of it, this is art.

i should give my piss boy plush piercings because york is pork now

tagged by @cnihachuu

last song listened to: a quick one before the eternal worm devours connecticut by have a nice life

favorite color: dark turquoise

currently watching: x files

last movie: the last unicorn

currently reading: the neverending story, animorphs 6, the vanishing face of gaia, iron widow, dr jeckle and mr hyde, gut

sweet/spicy/savory: spicy, i need every bite to be incredibly overstimulating

relationship status: unwanted

current obsessions: the jovian moons, folklore and biology of seals

last thing i googled: why is callisto so cratered

currently working on: song that includes all 95 confirmed jovian moons, fox mask, transcription of ride the cyclone

@pigeon-smidge you next buddy mwahhahaha