While Thea Made A Good Point, Nolan Would Not Allow The Message To Sink In. He Would Much Rather Sacrifice

everything happened fast and yet slow at the same time. the moment of eye contact was brief, but it struck a cord that rushed their shared memories to the front of his mind. nolan felt a desperation he thought he’d abandoned some time ago.

the aggression in serra’s large response made nolan release her. it was a reflexive movement, as if he'd placed his palm on a hot stove. despite appearing almost helpless, it felt like serra had turned to flame and now nolan had a burned hand.

he thought back to when he last saw her. she’d been unreadable to him. it had discomforted him then since he had believed himself to know her better than she knew herself. hadn’t he freed her? had she wanted to be free of him too?

recognizing the threat of spiraling down a hole they had gone down many times, nolan shook their head violently to bring them back up. his hand still burned from the contact. “okay. fine.” he said curtly. his lips pursed as he watched her walk away. nolan did his best to believe she would do as she said and meet him at the beach.

the water was warm on his feet as he paced along the shore. they had hoped the lapsing waves would soothe them, become a sort a sensory distraction, but it was no use. there was no escaping the anxiety and dread of being played for a fool yet again as old questions and worries troubled his mind. it wasn’t until he saw her from yards away did the water actually begin to comfort him.

shoes in hand, nolan walked towards her. “i’m really happy to see you,” he told her once they were close enough to that he was sure she’d hear, unwilling to admit he doubted she’d come. “i just didn’t think i’d see you.. here of all places.”

who: serra and nolan (@bnolan) where: coral cove beach, palmview, florida

they say that the human body will respond to fear in one of four ways: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. flight has always been serra’s default, but with nolan’s hand around her wrist, escape seems impossible. she’s like a deer in the headlights, her big, doe-like eyes caught in his piercing blue gaze. realizing her mouth is slightly agape, serra swiftly presses her lips together and swallows, throat tight. “get off me!" her words spit like venom as she yanks her arm away and takes a step back to create distance. after a moment, she takes a breath, "please leave me alone." though her words are softer, tears threaten to spill.

anger, betrayal, and a deep sadness consume her. she misses him terribly but no longer trusts him. nolan turned her into a pariah under the guise of "protecting" her-- how does that make sense? but as she stands there questioning his motives, the ache of missing him only grows when she looks into his eyes. she doesn’t owe him any explanation for ghosting, but she can’t help feeling a pang of sympathy, knowing he might be seeking one. nonetheless, this wasn't really the right place to do it. "we can talk, but not here. i'll meet you on the beach in twenty minutes." she says gently, then walks off to gather her thoughts before seeing him again.

without any hesitation, nolan reaches for the shot. they thank adrian, giving him a mischievous look before they down it, this time not even bothering to clink the small glass with other's. the spirit lifts him up, makes him stand up straighter as a small shiver goes down his spine. already he feels it working with the previous one to loosen him up. despite the muscles packed on him, nolan is a bit of a lightweight since he doesn't drink often. though lately, he's been indulging more and more. for a moment, he considers if maybe adrian has used substances as a way to blur out reality in the same way nolan has been since coming home. it almost makes him laugh. what does adrian need to run away from? his life is perfect.

taking a quick look around, nolan doesn't see anyone who catches his eye so he turns his attention back to his company. without rhodes around, nolan isn't really sure how to engage with adrian, so he has to resort to small talk. "so.. how are things? saw you swiping earlier. have you met anyone out here yet that you think will be able to tame the beast?" even as he speaks, nolan can hear how cringey the last of his words are but the vodka has already soothed his nerves enough for him not to care too much.

he's perched on nolan's couch, swiping through tinder like he swipes through insta stories -- barely paying attention. every time 'it's a match!' appears on his screen, he copy pastes and sends the exact same message: you're too fucking cute. going out tonight?

nolan's voice eventually pulls him out of his trance; a slow grin spreads over his features, visibly buzzed from pregaming at the yacht club since 2 pm. "aww, just tell me you missed me." adrian sure did; he enjoys their occasional hangouts, might even give him the drunk, sappy 'i love you, man' speech in the bathrooms of whatever establishment they end up at.

"to boy's night." he smirks, holding up the mini bottle of grey goose (or what's left of it anyway, because nolan sure took his sweet time).

--

they go to adrian's favorite club; he's chummy with the bouncer who lets them straight in, the dirty looks from the rest of the line only fueling his power trip. inside, he orders three shots, downs one by himself before bringing the other two back to nolan, "you've got some catching up to do."

just as nolan was about to ask about any potential allergies, liv made it clear that she didn't have any. endless possibilities. they lightly tapped their index finger against their lip. he wasn't much of a sweets guy and he didn't exactly know her well enough to know her taste; the combination made it difficult to be confident in his decision. still, he liked the promise of being treated to something, so he wasn't going to back pass the opportunity. "go with..." he dragged out the last syllable as his eyes scanned the selection of pastries, "the lemon poppy muffin, it'll go good with the london fog." though he said it with assurance, noaln wasn't exactly sure if it really would make a good pair. comfortable with making orders, he added, "which also happens to be what i want. iced."

OPEN TO ALL

LOCATION: sunshine bakery

“Okay so here’s the deal,” Alivia prompted, turning from the display case to the person next to her. “If you can help me pick something to get, I’ll buy whatever you want. My treat.” She offered. At this point in her day, she needed a boost that usually came in the form of something sugary and something caffeinated. And sometimes, she liked getting suggestions for what she should get. Hence the attempt at recruiting the other into her plan. “I’ll try anything, so the possibilities are endless at this point.” She laughed.

“i’m glad y’all are around,” nolan tells adrian in regards to him and his brother also staying in palmview. if you asked them, nolan wouldn’t be able to say if it was sincere. maybe it was and it wasn’t. i can be complex, he thinks to himself.

on one hand, it was nice to have an old friend nearby. someone to be himself with. someone who was good at looking away from the ugly side of things. nolan didn’t want to think about los angeles, but it was getting hard to suppress the violent flashbacks of his last day there…

on the other hand, they aren’t the biggest fan of adrian. in fact, on a good day and if he wasn’t in sight, nolan would not call adrian a friend. but their mothers are friends, plus adrian’s known to make generous donations to the fundraisers nolan takes part in organizing, so keeping up appearances with the shephards has its importance.

getting the last of his things, nolan is finally ready. “okay, let’s get into some trouble,” he says with a smile, tossing a nip of adrian’s choice of spirit to him, then he twists the cap to his open. nolan holds up the mini alcohol bottle, taking a moment to think of what to toast to. “to boy’s night,” he says once he realizes he won’t be able to come up with anything better. // @adrivns

despite being somewhat of public figure, nolan did not do well in crowds. less so since the riot. after spilling most of his first drink, he had made his way back to charlotte and played the gentleman by offering to get them drinks. he held both of them in his hand, though he was not yet ready to get back into the thick of it. spotting another wallflower, nolan scooted closer to her just in time to catch her remark. it made him chuckle. "giving yourself a pep talk?" he questioned, a gentle smile still lingering on their lips. "mind if i have one too?"

for: everyone. where: the sunset villa's beach party event. " this should be fun. " alyssa mumbled to herself and held the glass of her drink in her hands. taking a few quick sips from her drink. her eyes now began to scan around at the party. the music that was playing was so loud that it was blasting through her ears. the blonde was just standing here and waiting for a few more minutes before going around and mingling.

if there was one thing nolan could count on, it was lottie being a good sport. he appreciated their deal, though he hadn't been totally transparent with his intentions. yes, it was true he did want to people to see them together. to talk about them, questioning the nature of the pair's relationship. maybe the buzz would become widespread enough to distract any media that might already be looking at him into rumors of nolan ballard having a new beau; replace any other unwanted headlines. if anyone here could, it would be charlotte with her professional ties, after all.

truly though, he wouldn't mind if the gossip stayed local, so long as it reached a specific someone's ears. unsure if he was ready to admit to all of that, nolan decided to ease into it. that way he could always always backtrack and course correct. "just, err, catching up with an old friend. it's been weird being back home and seeing the faces of people i thought i'd never see again," he tells her, looking at her radiant smile, hearing her giggle, it made him relax some. "you seem to be having a great time, though. and here i thought my absence would make your heart grow fonder and miss me." though it's said in a playful tone, there's a hint of truth to it. nolan would have everyone wrapped around his finger if he could.

(closed event starter: @bnolan )

one drink, two drinks, three drinks more... charlotte had lost count of the minutes or maybe hours that nolan had stepped away along with the amount of drinks she had consumed. she was feeling light, airy, and free as she lounged on one of the chairs. she got bored of the conversations she was a part of but found herself with a bright grin watching what looked like the downfall of many many residents of palm view. "oh look, he finally returned.." she teased as she saw the other finally approaching her. "quick, dont make it obvious, but it looks like yet another break up happening at three o'clock.. or is it six o'clock ??" lottie let out a soft giggle. "anywhoooo.. where did you run off to ? and explain the sour face ??"

why are moms capable of just leeching vibe arsenic into the atmosphere when they’re pissed