Faggot!!!

I'm low-key stalking you

Look out the nearest window

😁

DO NOTTTTT I just looked out the window because I thought I heard something. 😭😭

asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room

Normal fandoms: I don't know if I like this pairing, A has manipulated B quite a lot and they keep enabling each other's unhealthy coping mechanisms

Hilson fans: when they drug each other 🥰💗🥹

i hate driving. here are the laws! if you break them there will be consequences! except youre also expected to break the law just a little bit. people will get mad at you if you dont. you dont have right of way but the person who does is waving you forward for some reason. here's the speed limit! it's not the speed limit, the actual speed limit is that plus ~5-10. the light is green but you're in the turning lane. can you go? should you have gone just then? the person behind you is honking at you. there's a weird noise coming from your engine; if you try to do the right thing and get it checked out, will you get scammed? you are driving a 1-2 ton metal machine rocketing at speeds unknown to humankind for most of history. around a million people die in car accidents every year; that's about one person every thirty seconds. if you take that seriously and try to drive safely then people get mad at you.

Husband, I put the stars you gave me on a necklace

THATS SO PEAKKK now I have to make more so the necklace becomes full with stars LMAO

Me, going through life claiming I've finished House when in fact my ending is Season 8 episode 20😔

ur so silly I wanna encase u in a cube of resin and put u on a shelf like a trinket :3

I will break free from my cube.

till then, I would love to be a shelf trinket!

pear family

HAIIII ALL THE COOL PEOPLE COME BE FRIENDS WITH ME IF YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY WICKED GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!