Seductive Coquette

Saying Ford's worst character trait is ego is like saying Stan's worst character trait is greed.

I swear if people talked about stan the way they do about ford. He would be so hated.

Ford's worst character trait is not having enough screen time.

Screen time stan got, in spades by comparison, to make you feel bad for him or have over the top hero moments to balance out the overall crappy-ness.

I guesse ford just wasn't as funny about it.

I don't dislike stan, I dislike this fucking golden boy treatment he gets.

It's like saying dipper is the only one who's obviously neurodivergent.

Or that fidd is only either sunshine or evil genuis.

It's fucking nauseatingly surface level.

And in the case of ford even the shows creator is like "oh yeah he's just an arrogant prick" agh it's awful

...it also has undercurrents of ablism...

Like... dipper and stan are the "straight men" to their "eccentric twins".

Like "ohhh poor dipper and stan they're so underappreciated.. with all their hero moments, having the majority of the main emotional beats focus on them...ect"

He just eats pizza

The double meaning of the lyrics just had me at gunpoint.

Song: Counting Stars by OneRepublic

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HAPPY 23RD BIRTHDAY DIPPER AND MABEL PINES (31 August, 1999)

something fabulous

Cedric's nose appreciation post‼️

(Un)popular opinion: I hate when people draw Cedric without his nose. That's his charm. Every time people do rhinoplasty on a big nose, a fairy dies. Big nose is peak character design

look at his cute nose he's so babygirl

I thought it looked weird at first but now I'm a lot more used to his face. Don't let yourself be fooled by his appearence, sooner or later you will fall in love with him

Look at this oneee😭😭💗💗💗 how can you hate something so precious

#justiceforcedricsnose

A little while ago I saw online someone had made a DND character sheet for Ford Pines. In the ability scores area, they had intelligence as the highest (makes sense), and strength as one of the lowest (fair enough)

But then they had wisdom as second highest and dexterity as second lowest, and I gotta say, I think those two need to be flipped

I mean let’s start with dexterity. Now I’m not an expert on DND by any means so apologies if I am misunderstanding dexterity here, but others have pointed out that Ford spent his entire adulthood chasing after and/or running from paranormal creatures. I guess I just feel like he has to have high dexterity for him to have even survived all those years.

Also this

But wisdom being low is where I feel most strongly.

I wouldn’t be the first to point out that Ford, while highly intelligent, completely lacks common sense.

People have noted that the safety measures for turning the portal on and off should have been reverse, that the portal shouldn’t have been that easy to turn on by accident and yet it required at least two people to turn it off.

He keeps an infinity die in a “cheap plastic case”

He gives a 12 year old a cross bow

He gives another 12 year old a mind control tie and tells him to “use it responsibly”

He takes Dipper out on several missions that were probably too dangerous for him, refer to the magnet gun above, where Dipper, if he didn’t do it right, could have fallen to his death, and Ford also took him on the mission to shoot Bill for …some reason???? Leave the 12 year old at home when you go kill god to save the world from the current apocalypse! Why do I even need to say that??? Also “don’t worry I’ve been down here countless times and all the aliens are dead…probably”

As I recall, “Bill proofing the shack” was his first line of defense and “Bill proof our minds” was “the next best thing” …shouldn’t those be reversed??? You gotta leave the shack at some point????

According to journal 3, Ford was the one who encouraged Stan to take the kids on a road trip RIGHT AFTER BILL PROOFING THE SHACK, which completely defeats the purpose of doing that in the first place.

I’ve pointed this out before, “Mabel will be fine! I watched her become pen pals with the pizza delivery man in the 15 seconds he was at the door!” … Ford…that’s creepy has hell, keep that pizza delivery man away from your niece!”

When weirdmageddon started he wrote in his journal????? And drew a lovely little detailed image?????

See that little greenish sticky note at the top? That’s my little note that says “when did you have time to write this?????” Seriously what. “It’s the end of the world…i gotta draw this and write a little entry on it before I save everyone!!!” It’s the drawing that really gets me. Okay write a note in case someone else has to take over but WHY THE DRAWING

And finally, everyone is holding hands at the Cipher Wheel. Stan is essential and is refusing to join unless Ford thanks him for saving him. Ford reluctantly does so. It’s now clear that Stan is willing to put everyone, Dipper and Mabel included, at risk just because he wants a thank you, so Ford decides this is a really good time to CORRECT STAN’S GRAMMAR

Look I say this with love but,

Ford may be the smartest people in the room but he’s also the biggest dumbass in the room. This man has no wisdom.

Frank and his attempts at flirting

Some drawings of these two from the past week!

More silly attempts to summarise my headcannon for these two.

[OK before I knew it these paragraphs appeared out of nowhere!]

After Ford starts dimension hopping I like the idea of them having a kind of cartoony back and fourth "I'll get you next time!" dynamic for a bit, except both end up in the position of the pursuer swearing vengeance and they switch back and forth depending on the context.

Bizarre banter during a chase scene, trying to outsmart the other's quips, deliberately prolonging they're interactions for very important and strategic reasons, stuff like that.

Point is they become very familiar with eachother, for better or worse, over the course of this 20 or so year long dynamic and it starts to become surprisingly fun? (Not sure what word to use exaclty it's very clear in my head but- agh words-)

I also imagine many times where they just... talk. No chasing or fighting or theatrics, they just chat over tea, usually in Ford's mindscape, with his encrypted thoughts it becomes safer to interact. Although they're are rare and very breaf moments when they're actually in person for once and they're also just chatting.

Until something serious happens, once again reality ruins all the fun, one thing leads to another, Ford's got a metal plate fixed into his skull, is building a quantum destabiliser, and Bill is furious.

Tale as old as time.

*jab jab*