Kaiaspapayas - KaiKai

Starting a new thread of insane shit I over hear my husband say to our toddler.

“Here, will this rice cake cracker sate your dark passanger?”

but! we! cannot! simply! sit! and! stare! at! our! wounds! forever!

I'd like to introduce everyone to this horrid thing I created about a year ago but haven't shown many people yet (probably for the best).

This is Baby. AKA The Monster. AKA Sight Tremendous and Abhorred, AKA Vile Insect, AKA A Thing Such As Even Dante Could Not Have Conceived, etc, etc. It's made from bits of scrap fabric I scrounged from various sources and is roughly the size of a human toddler. Its design is based on Mary Shelly's original descriptions of Frankenstein's creature.

But that's not all! Behold!

You can dissect this little abomination to reveal a full set of crocheted, knitted, and scrap fabric organs, all hand-stitched by yours truly!

It has a heart, stomach, lungs, liver, small and large intestine, kidneys, bladder, and, of course, a brain! So it can ponder the horrors of its own existence!

I used this pattern by Less Than Three for the heart. I ended up felting it because I screwed up most of the stitches (I was relatively new to crochet at the time). The result was a bit of a blobby mess, but oh well.

So yeah. This thing lives in my house now (my family hates it). I have yet to reap the full consequences of my hubris.

Being in love is so funny, sometimes you know right away, sometimes it takes years and many near-death experiences to realize you’re in love with your child’s other dad

I like when my dreams reuse locations from past dreams. like oh cool we doin a bottle episode

They hate her for being the funniest bitch alive

“I think I want to try writing a book, but I’m terrified that it will reveal my inner-most self to be… BORING!”

Posted from the PostSecret website.

Remember in 1993 when Jurassic Park was like…the end all, be all of special effects?

Strange Bird

if you like lego + jumping spiders, you should vote on this user created lego product idea! if it gets 10k votes it has the chance to become a real set 🕷️🕷️🕷️

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