11pm, 6pm And 3am

Dear lord when I get to heaven please let me bring my meeeeen (they’re either dead or old)

😌🤍

therapists HATE to see these three coming

This is what makes us girls

no lube, no protection, all night, all day, fro.m the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the bathroom sink to the shower, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic, exponential, logarithmic, while I gasp for air, scream, and see the light, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy, backwards, sideways, upside down, on the floor, in the bed, on the couch, on a chair, being carrier, against the wall, outside, in a train, on a plane, in the car, on a motorcycle, on the back of a truck, on a trampoline, in a bounce, in the pool, in the garden, bent over, in the basement, against the window, having the most toe curling, back arching, leg shaking, dick throbbing, fist clenching, era ringing, mouth drooling, ass clenching, nose sniffing, eye watering, eye rolling, hip thrusting, earthquaking, sheet gripping, knuckles cracking, jaw dropping, hair pulling, teeth jitterbug, mind blogging, soul snatching, overstimulating, vile, sloppy, moan introducing, heart wrenching, spine tingling, back breaking, atrocious, gushy, creamy, beastly, lip biting, gravity defying, nail biting, sweaty, feet kicking, mind blowing, body shivering, orgasmic, bone breaking, world ending, black hole creating, universe destroying, devious, scrumptious, amazing, delightful, delectable, unbelievable, body numbing, bark worthy, can't walk, head nodding, soul evaporating, vulcano erupting, sweat rolling, voice cracking, trembling, sheets soaked, hair drenched, flabbergasting, lip locking, skin peeling, eye widening, pussy popping, nail scratching, back cuts, spectacular, brain cell devolving, hair ripping, show stopping, magnificent, unique, extraordinary, splendid, phenomenal, mouth foaming, heavenly,

Awwww 🫐

Stanley is obsessed with calling you his wife/husband/ spouse that he uses it more often then he does your actual name.

‘Have you met my wife/husband/spouse?’

‘My wife/husband/spouse is gorgeous.’

‘All marriage is a sham but my marriage to my wife/husband/spouse is going great, you lot be safe though.’

Stanley loves calling you his wife/husband/ spouse because you saying yes was the best thing in his life in a really, really long time and he didn’t want to fuck this up in the slightest.

Ford says it because he’s in disbelief that you actually married him.

So much so that he mumbles ‘I have a wife/husband/spouse?’ Constantly as the smile on his face gets bigger as he exclaims ‘I HAVE A WIFE/HUSBAND/SPOUSE!’ He then rushes over to you, holds your face as he kisses it while thanking you for being his wife/husband/spouse.

my favorite albums by color

*༺♱༻*