Happy Pesach!

What I need in my life right now

A photo shoot of Jason Statham, Luke Evans, and Vanessa Kirby acting like the Shaw Siblings

Just image all of them with semi matching outfits, all doing badass poses, all interacting with each other in some way

And the second half of it is just all of them acting like annoying siblings. Luke and Vanessa are screaming in each other face. The next photo Jason is pushing them apart. A third photo of him grabbing both of them by the ear

You have all of them sitting, both Vanessa and Luke on either side of Jason, resting their heads on his shoulders, looking up at him adoringly.

And finally, you have The Rock there, getting threatened by all three. Luke has a gun, Vanessa a knife, and whatever they could find on set for Jason to use as a weapon

Please someone. Anyone. Please make this happen

Hozier really said "aight imma write an album that requires PhDs in linguistics, Irish history, and sociology to understand, as well as the emotional vulnerability to cry and the desire to lay facedown in the dirt for several hours" and then dropped Unreal Unearth

Hello again Omni! Can we see a bit of Owen experiences in the army please? He must've not liked being bossed around very much.

Oh hell yeah, Owen HATED having to take orders! Sure, he'll let Deckard boss him around, but nobody else!

~~~

When Owen joined the military, he had honestly never expected to have to start at the bottom. He had just assumed they would see his intellect and genius and allow him to move up the ranks with ease

That wasn't quite the case

Now, standing alongside two dozen other recruits in boot camp, Owen tried to keep the sneer off his face as their drill sergeant yelled at them

Apparently, not all of them could keep up with the vigorous training and now all of them were being chewed out

"- when I tell you to run ten kilometers, you run those ten kilometers! Not walk or or prance, or whatever you want!"

Owen couldn't help his eye roll

"Got something to say, Shaw?!" The sergeant screamed in his face

"No, sir." Owen said smoothly

"For that lip, you'll be cleaning out the latrines!"

Owen didn't bother stopping the sneer that crossed over his face

---

"In line soldiers!"

Owen easily stood with the rest of his squad, waiting for his leader's orders. Even though they were extremely stupid and Owen knew they were going to be ambushed

But no matter how many times Owen tried to butt in, the leaders of his squad and others refused to listen to him. They were convinced they wouldn't get ambushed

Straightening his back, Owen glanced over at his fellow squad mates. He could see that they were all nervous, having listened to his angry words against the leaders

They were all now convinced they were about to be ambushed

But even if that was the case, Owen would do all he could to make sure they all came out of it alive

---

"Well done, captain Shaw."

With a polite smile, Owen shook the hands of several high ranking officers. He had just been promoted, even though he wished it had been sooner

After all, it had taken Deckard a lot less time to reach captain

But, Deckard also didn't have the pension for mischief that Owen did. And Deckard could actually follow orders

"Thank you, sir. I look forward to leading my soldiers into battle."

And not get them killed like you have, was unspoken. Even if Owen made sure to say the sentiment with the grip he had on the other man's hand

~~~

I hope you enjoyed friend!

Shit Slytherins Say: #222

I tell you, when I actually die, some people are going to get seriously haunted.

DID YOU SEE THE NEW TEASER TRAILER FOR F9???? I AM SO EXCITED!!!! More mama Shaw! Letty missing her old life and being excited to get back into action! HAN!!!!

NO?! I DID NOT KNOW A NEW TEASER CAME OUT!!

BUT OMG, MORE MAMA SHAW??

THE MOVIE ADDRESS LETTY MISSING HER FAST LIFE??

HAN???

Thanks for telling me friend 😭 I now know what I'll be obsessing over for the next few days weeks months

tony stark discovers a new element (2/2)

For someone who brags about their subtleness, precision, and finesse, the Shaw siblings are all show-offs and attention seekers.

They really are!!

When introduced, all the Shaws are shown to be the utmost badasses around!

But when we see them on screen, they're badass, but absolutely RIDICULOUS

Owen?

Monologues to Dom for several minutes and gets to live out his life time dream of being a melodramatic villain

Deckard?

Doesn't even manage to kill one member of the crew, but manages to bring down how many buildings? How many explosions did he cause?

Hattie?

Immediately gets a wig and fights a guy 2 heads taller than her, and 3 times her weight. And she keeps fighting! The whole time delivering quips!

These three can be excellent spies/criminals/badasses, but when it comes down to it, all three are attention seekers

When they know they have someone to flaunt to, they will

Usually to potential mates

So, basically.

The Shaws are peacocks

Loud, obnoxious, and extremely noticeable when they want to be

So the 27th of February marked the two year anniversary of my first character ask, and because I'm sentimental, I decided to do a complete redraw of it. Of course, because I procrastinate like hell, it took forever. Oh well, I still enjoyed it, and now I can finally move back onto the other thing I was working on.

This also coincided surreally with me reaching 800 followers, so thank you all. I didn't think I'd ever end up breaking 100 let alone 800.

*Also, I want to link you back to this post, which helped me immensely with the shading process. Thank you @geek-png !

Hey Omni!! Happy Friday! This is kind of going off that F9 mini fic you posted 🤗 But what if that's how Dom found out about his family coming out! Either walking in on them or having a Shaw bring it up! Rowen, Rattie, Shobbs. Can you imagine! Practically no one in his family is straight 😂🥰🥰😘💕💕

Happy Friday friend! I love this! It's just too funny to think that Dom just doesn't know everyone around him isn't straight 🤣

~~~

Placing the plate of burgers done on the table, Dom glanced over at Ramsey. She had her hair in two puffballs and a giant smile on her face. She had sat down a while ago, texting up a storm and laughing whenever she got a response

Dom hadn't seen her smile that much before, maybe only when she succeeded in hacking into someone with ease

"Whoever you're texting must be great." Dom smirked at Ramsey, who snapped her head up and gave him a shy smile

"Yeah, she is."

Dom raised an eyebrow

"We've been talking for a few weeks now, and um..." Ramsey looked away, suddenly embarrassed

"What?"

"I'm thinking about asking her out." Ramsey mumbled

Dom blinked. He hadn't known Ramsey even liked women. Maybe that explained why she hadn't shown any interest in Roman or Tej

"Go for it." Dom told her

"Really?" Ramsey looked up at him with hopeful eyes. "Do you think she'll say yes?"

"She'd be stupid not to." Dom smiled at her and was glad to see Ramsey's large smile in return as her thumbs flew over her phone

He wasn't expecting Ramsey's new girlfriend to be Hattie Shaw when they showed up a month later

---

When Deckard had started bringing his little brother and sister around to the family bbqs, Dom hadn't been the happiest to see Owen

Luckily, the middle Shaw was great with the kids and apologized profusely to Mia. It had been hilarious to see her slap him and demand he do the dishes by himself

What Dom hadn't expected was Roman to start acting strange whenever Owen got close to him

There wasn't much bad blood between them. Roman had barely interacted with Owen since their crew had tried to take him down. So, why was Roman nervous around him?

After several cookouts, Dom noticed that both Owen and Roman had disappeared. Suspicious, Dom had gone in search of the two just in case Owen did something to Roman

What be wasn't expecting was Owent to be sitting on Roman's lap, kissing him with intense passion

"Ahem." Dom cleared his throat and smirked when he saw Roman jerk so badly, he smashed his and Owen's noses together

"Ro!" Owen hissed

"Sorry!" Roman said quietly but sent a sheepish look towards Dom

Shaking his head, Dom looked at them pointedly

"If any of the kids ask, you two get to give the birds and the bees talk."

With that, Dom turned on his heel and left the two men

He never would have guessed Roman was interested in guys

---

Looking around Luke's backyard, Dom was a bit surprised by all the food that was already set up on the large picnic table. Everything looked amazing

There was no way Luke had done this himself

"Looks great, Hobbs." Dom nodded in appreciation

"Thanks. But I have to say, it's mostly all because of Deckard."

"Deckard?" Dom frowned and looked at the other man. Everyone else was milling around and taking their seats at the table. He could see out of the corner of his eye Baby Brian trying to sit on two at once, mostly likely trying to save him a seat

"Yeah. Ever since he moved in, he's really been sprucing up the place. And cooking everything. The man could have been a professional chef."

"Really." Dom said and saw Deckard step out of the back door, holding yet another plate of food

Deckard was smiling widely as he greeted everyone. And if Dom looked closely enough, he could see a small gold ring on his finger

Glancing to Luke, Dom saw an identical ring

Was nobody in his family straight?

~~~

I hope you enjoyed friend!

thinking about when i was small, how my mom told me that pipe cleaners were just a tool until people started idly shaping things with them and it grew so popular that they were marketed as crafting materials. and that story about how the original frisbees were disposable pie plates that students flattened to throw. and how when i was a child i had a wooden mancala set with shiny, colorful stones, but on invention it was played with rocks and grooves dug into the dirt. and middle school, paper football and tic-tac-toe and mash and mad libs, games that just need pen and paper. and before that, games of pretend with pirates and princes and masked marauders. how at slumber parties after lights out, we used to whisper storytelling games, i say one sentence and you say the next. and shadow puppets. and the way all the kids in the neighborhood used to divide into teams and throw fallen pine cones at one another. and the floor is lava game, and the quiet game, and the games i play with my coworkers that are just words and retention. and "put a finger down" on the high school bus. and little girls clapping together, and how the first jump-rope was undoubtedly just a length of rope who knows how long ago, and how natural it is to play, how we seek play at every age and with any resources we have and with whatever time we can squeeze it into in a day. i'm not an anthropologist or a psychologist but i think after food and shelter and water and air what comes next is games and stories and laughter. i think that there is nothing -- not sex or fighting or forming unlikely bonds with animals -- there is nothing more human than to play.