Sorry Man I Can't Hang Out Today. Yeah I'm Being Put Down. Yeah It's Probably Gonna Be All Day. Sorry

*voice echoing through the subterranean caverns and halls of the catacombs* whatever man. are we gonna kiss or not.

starting a conspiracy theory that all scientific beliefs were correct at the time they were developed. the earth was the center of the solar system until later it changed and thats why gallileo noticed. you used to be able to cure tuberculosis with mercury and cocaine. subatomic particles didnt act like that until we tried to look at them

they honorably discharged me from the army and gave me a purple heart after i was hit by a cumshot

i love the x files

me standing over a dead body with a bloody knife in my hand: look i know this looks very…uh…(absently snaps fingers three times) oh what’s the word….(”bad?”) no, not bad…i mean, yes bad, obviously, but…uh…it’s like “convicting” but it’s not? you know? well anyway..ugh this is gonna be bothering me all day until i think of it..

Crucifix Pocket Knife Necklace from contrary

You ever think about the kind of guy who makes a cursed amulet? Like, “ooh hoo hoo, whoever puts this on is gonna have a nasty surprise!” Get a real hobby.

this is good john cho content thank you john