Anyone Else Ever Wish They Could Lie Down Harder? Like, I'm Already Horizonal, But I Need More Horizonal.

coworkers under 35 love me for my cowboy bebop jacket, coworkers over 35 love me for my cd player, management loves me for my mental illness-fueled punctuality. everyone feels vaguely wary of me for my overall poor impression of acting like a human

Quiet Quitting is when you're not doing anything wrong but the vibes are off

per anon’s request, i present to you THE best version of beatrice’s monologue in much ado about nothing. i thought about cropping this but decided this scene must be watched in its full glory

Just finished catching up on Dungeon Meshi. What am I gonna do with myself now while I wait for the next episode?! D:

the Federation itself as a concept is so funny because the founding members are

the Vulcans, who have been friends with humanity for years but don't seem to actually like them all that much, instead regarding them with a sort of perverse fascination usually reserved for virology labs

the Andorians, who were fighting the Vulcans for like a hundred years

the Tellarites, who don't like any of these people and whose cultural trait is arguing, and

humans, whom nobody knew existed until last century when they shot themselves into space on a heavily modified nuke, invented world peace and won a fight with the nearest imperial superpower

like imagine you're the Romulan Empire and these weird monkeys who've barely figured out interstellar travel show up on your doorstep in the equivalent of a shipping container with missiles strapped to it, kick your ass in front of everybody, and then start a friendship club with 3 of your neighbours who all hated each others' guts until like a year ago. now I understand why every Romulan on the show is so angry

julian at the start of ds9: well i did it i bamboozled all of the starfleets and now i am here julikhan noonien bashing with my diabolical plan to heal random aliens on the farthest space station i could find from my stupid parents teehee guess i’ll sit here all alone and sip my silly little tea like a friendless british loser all a part of my master plan garak dissolving straight through the wall tits first: heLLO i am Not A Spy unless that’s your kink and i’m definitely not tripping several balls unless that’s your kink HAHAHAHA drugs aren’t real anyway wow i can’t believe we’re already politically advantageous best friends that’s crzy and i’m sure won’t awaken anything in me btw totally unrelated how do you feel about public sex julian, completely tangled in the centerpiece: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

that’s a whole man.

This is what an evil boop looks like.

I’ve seen a lot of videos going around of urban-dwelling critters coming to humans for help with various problems, ranging from boxes stuck on their heads to young trapped down a storm drain, and it’s gotten me to thinking:

On the one hand, it’s kind of fascinating that they know to do that.

On the other hand, setting any questions of how this sort of behaviour must have arisen aside for the nonce, does it ever strike you how weird it is that we’ve got a whole collection of prey species whose basic problem-solving script ends with the step “if all else fails, go bother one of the local apex predators and maybe they’ll fix the problem for no reason”?