2am Thoughts - Blog Posts

Has anyone else had that weird urge to eat an entire container of chocolate chip ice cream at 2 am or is it just me?

if you think about it, all religions and philosophies are basically elaborate fanfictions about the OG Creator and the creation story.

some are canon-compliant. some are wildly canon divergent. some are fix-it fics trying to rewrite “what went wrong.” some are fluff. some are angst. some are smut. some are full-blown parallel universes with different worldbuilding rules. some are written in metaphor and poetry (10k words of mystic pining). some are just meta commentary in disguise.

you’ve got -

canon-divergent AUs

crossover fics (syncretic religions mashing up pantheons like nobody’s business)

intense ship wars (wars have literally been fought over theology)

mystic fluff (divine love as the ultimate soulmate trope)

smutfic level intimacy (let’s not offend anyone but believe me there are some hardcore shit out there)

philosophy as fan essays debating the creator’s intent

crackfic cults that somehow still have a niche following

humanity’s been adding chapters to the same sprawling multi-universe fanfiction for thousands of years, and honestly? some of the worldbuilding is insane in the best way.

P.S just like the other canons, nobody is interested in this canon.

A sleepless night isn't as bad as it could be when I am talking with you.

2 am Thoughts

All of the sad songs make me think of you. But that's a part of all break ups. And even when I think I'm over you I hear that one song and all the feelings come back. And then I'm at square one all over again. It's such a vicious cycle that I was pulled into and can't seem to pull myself out of.

- I haven't cried... Yet

"Do you ever think about what could've been?"

-2 A.M. Thoughts (via. Wounded-writing)

A collection of paradoxes. The chilly air of the lingering winter intertwined with the uncomfortable, looming heat of the sun rays, looking to transform into a blazing wildfire. For me, March isn't about bright and colourful flowers. It's about a blindingly bright environment in which I hopelessly stumble around in a vain attempt to regain my bearings. It's not about hope, for me, it has a general sense of dreariness and resignation. And...I welcome it for what it is.

It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.

Charles Dickens, Great Expectations

Here are some thoughts I've had and quoted.

She needs to stop smelling the roses or I'll push her into the thorny ones

"You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. You sure as hell can drown it though!"

"Keep that shit up. I'll shove my foot so far up your ass, I'll wear you like a sock."

"I hope, with a prayer behind my teeth"

"As long as I hold your hand; I'd call the flames of hell paradise."

"The reason we have red roses is because Aphrodite got pricked or cut by a thorn and bled upon some white roses. I thought the god's blood ichor was foretold to be gold in color. Perhaps in that moment of vulnerability, she was human for that time as she rushed to her love. How human it is to fear to love something death can take away yet do so anyway."

"You can talk shit about me all you want, but you better be better than me."

"I know I'm kind, I know people hurt me because of it. Take advantage and hurt me and yet I'm still kind. 'if you want peace, prepare for war,' I'll be the peace and suffer the war."

"We'll make the fall of angels look like a little trip."

"I do not fear death. It is but a promised whisper, neither one of us knows when it'll come but it is not something to fear."

"When you are under emotional distress, you needn't cause pain to others in retribution. They don't need to bleed with you to understand you."

"She went from sweet, shy and timid to I'm going to harvest your organs in a minute."

"When I was in so much pain my body would give out from under me, I always felt the need to apologize. "I'm sorry that my body is so weak." I was a child, what the hell was I meant to be."

"You should never look a gift horse in the mouth but it keeps smiling at me."

"You're going to have to go and pick a god to protect you and hope they are stronger than my rage."

"I can appreciate another being, someone else's form- but I made a home in these bones that I call my own and wish for no other shape than the one I'm given."

"'Did you take your pills?' At least I have pills. Nothing can fix that shit personality of yours."

She needs to stop smelling the roses before I push her into the thorny ones.

Me, thehiddenwhiterose

Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.

Leonardo da Vinci

If I could find the words, if I could shake the world, If I could turn back time would you still be there? If I could stop the words you say, If I could shake the world way you take, Then would you still be there?

Would You Still Be There, by Of Mice and Men

Maybe we are all crazy, that’s why we search for love in places it can never be found.

4 a.m. thoughts

2AM SAGAU THOUGHT

would genshin characters get jealous of your phone

If someone had to ask, “what’s the worst part of living with bpd?”

I think I’d say, trying to explain to someone what it’s like to not know who you are. Trying to explain swimming to someone who’s never seen water. Trying to explain purple to someone who’s blind.

It always results in a response along the lines of “But I know you”.

Which forces the conversation to an end, with a sigh. Realising that no one will ever truly understand what you are trying to tell them.

Realising that, the person they know, is based on themselves. Or the current movie character obsession of the week.

Trying to explain to someone that, if you were left alone, without any form of influence - real, or fictional - you would be stuck in place.

My cursed 2:00AM thoughts

Seriously guys wtf is going on in my head.