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Got inspired and wrote a little something for @wolfstarmicrofic! CW: (mild) internalized acephobia
11:52pm
Remus is panicking, just a bit.
Maybe more than a bit.
He’s been dating Sirius for eight months, a relationship record for Remus. Embarrassingly long-held feelings for Sirius aside, Remus has never met anyone who was okay with the lack of kissing and sex that dating him entailed. Sirius has been nothing but accepting and even loving; he says he’s fine with not having sex, not kissing on the mouth, even with Remus not sleeping in the same bed some nights.
But Remus can’t stop thinking about New Year’s traditions, and expectations.
The whole kissing thing is just…gross. He can’t. He won’t. And a corner of his brain is adamant that Sirius wouldn’t want him to if he didn’t want to anyways.
11:56pm
James and Sirius rush in from the kitchen, balancing glasses of champagne. James joins Lily and Peter on the floor while Sirius nestles into Remus’s side on the couch, nudging their glasses into his hands. He wraps Remus up in his warm, strong arms and Remus relaxes, feeling the anxiety brewing in his chest lose a bit of its fizz.
“Hi, my Moony. What’s going on in that silly head of yours?”
Remus sighs. “I just, just—you know I can’t kiss you at midnight right? I can’t, it’s…icky and it makes me feel bad and it’s not fair for you to miss out because of me, you’re supposed to kiss the person you want to spend the year with and I can’t—”
Sirius squeezes him tighter, rocks him just a little. “Shh, baby. It’s okay.” His mouth is right by Remus’s ear, voice hardly above a whisper. “You’re being silly. I don’t need a kiss, I just need the year with you.”
Remus tips his head back to look at Sirius. “Promise?”
Sirius smiles at him fondly. “Promise.”
11:59pm
“Guys! It’s 11:59!” shouts Lily. Everyone leaps up and piles onto the couch, Sirius squishing even closer to Remus to make room for all five of them. Lily ends up on James’s lap.
When the countdown begins, they scream along, and when the clock turns to midnight they all cheer. Sirius leans in and presses his cheek against Remus’s with a satisfied sigh. “Happy New Year, Moons.”
Warmth creeps into his cheeks, and Remus is sure Sirius can feel it. They stay there until Remus has gathered the courage to turn to his boyfriend and gently kiss the top of his head. “Happy New Year, Pads.” Sirius looks up at him with a sleepy smile on his face, and Remus smiles back.