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D&d 5e - Blog Posts
Magic Item Idea
12ft Magic ladder
Description: A magic 12ft ladder that you can make appear from thin air when facing a 10ft or higher wall.
Functionality: You can roll a number of d4 equal to your level to make the ladder higher.
Inspiration: this meme ⬇️
Spell Idea
Cozy
Description: For 6 turns, you make your target feel like they are in their bed with a hot blanket around them, making them feel so cozy that they don’t want to move or do anything that could make that feeling disappear.
Functionality: If your enemy fails a Constitution saving throw they lose half of their movement speed and have disadvantage to all their attacks or actions that require moving (ex: spells with a Somatic component) and will have to roll 1d20 to see if they feel like doing it (ex: before drinking a health potion). If somebody uses a sleep spell against that same target they’ll have disadvantage on the saving throw required to escape from it.
Inspiration: It’s me, I’m cozy.
Spell Idea
Cats
Functionality: After having rolled to hit, open #cats on Tumblr or r/cats on Reddit, depending on the color and the number of the cats that appear in the 1d6-th post filtered by newest the effect of the spell changes.
Colour: (multiple effects can take place if the cat has multiple colours)
Orange: deal Xd10 of fire damage (doubles the damage if it falls/stairs are involved in the post)
Black: deal Xd10 of necrotic damage (d12 if completely black)
White: deal Xd10 of radiant damage (d12 if you’re a paladin, +2 if it has blue eyes)
Brown: deal Xd8 of poison damage (+2 total damage if it’s a video)
Gray: deal Xd10 force damage (advantage if it is a baby)
Others (even artificially coloured fur): Xd20 of cold damage (+3 total damage if the cat looks angry/annoyed by it)
The X value is the result of the 1d6 used to decide which post to pick
Number:
X gains a +1
X gains a +2
The total damage gains a +3
The total damage gains a +3 and X gains a +1 if one or more bonus effects of the colours took place
or more: The total damage gains a +5 and X gains a +1 for each and every type of bonuses that took place
Additional bonuses:
+1 damage if the post has multiple photos
+3 damage if the post mentions the name of the cat
X+1 if the cat has any type of deformity
+1 Inspiration point if this is the first time using the spell and while showing the post anyone says “Awwww” (if it’s the DM, everyone gains one)
+2d4 health to all the Tabaxi in the party
+2d4 health if there’s a pet cat in the party
+2d4 temporary hit points to anyone who owns a cat (even the DM, but only to one creature and only if they feel like it)
+1d8 of the type of damage indicated by the colour (if multiple you decide which) for each of the players who is willing to take a video of themselves saying meow (this has to be on the same video)
Inspiration: I spent the last ???? hours, looking at cats and I do not regret it.

Here is a photo of my cat
Pet Idea
Mouseth
Description: A mouse-like creature that randomly appear in the vicinity of the owner (preferably on their shoulder or head) say some random silly shit with a really high pitched voice and then disappears again.
Abilities: The owner has +2 to their wisdom score and a +5 on Animal Handling, that becomes +6 if it is to call the Mouseth to feed it. If the owner forgets to feed the Mouseth for three days straight the Mouseth will never appear again.
The same Mouseth can be owned by multiple people, but each one still has to feed it individually if they want to keep it, otherwise only the character who forgot will lose the ownership of the Mouseth.
A character have only one chance in their lifetime to own a Mouseth, once it leaves them they will never be able to reown one again, unless they use Wish, but they can’t wish for infinte Mouseth but only for a second chance to own one. To gain the ownership of the Mouseth, your character needs to feed it whatever food they have in their inventory if they meet it in the wild, or by saving the life of a random mouse/rat/rodent.
You can lose your ownership (forever) to a Mouseth by:
Trying to kill it while in the wild (pre-owning)
Killing a large amount of innocent mice/rats/rodents, no problem with monsters (pre-owning)
Disrespecting a Ratfolk/Mousefolk and being cursed by them (pre-owning) (they can curse players with the inability to own a Mouseth)
Forgetting to feed their Mouseth after 3 days from the last time (the Mouseth will appear and insult you for a last time)
Disrespecting the Mouseth (they have a very haughty behavior, often stopping after eating just to remember to everyone how cool they are)
Inspiration: this meme ⬇️
Thanks ❤️ @cuntmunism @gauntletqueen @sandboy-advance-sp
Magic Item
Cursed Letter
Description: A letter written in a magic language that translates immediately to the language that the creature reading knows the best. The writing is full of grammatical errors and random letters are in the middle of words, the capitals are randomised and the content of the text is unreadable.
Functionality: If a creature knowing how to read at least one language tries to read the letter it has to roll an Intelligence save,
If it fails they’ll have to roll another one, if they fail that too they’ll think that the letter is written in a special code, if they succeed they’ll be confused for 5 minutes
If they succeed they understand that the text as no meaning, but will still be confused at why this letter exist in the first place, becoming confused for 5 minutes.
Note: the 5min confusion can be stopped by a 15+ roll on Wisdom (1 roll only), the effects of the 5min confusion are the same after the spell Confusion
Inspiration: A scam message that was written in some kind of ancient English by someone with arthritis while having a stroke, that a bot sent to me this morning.
This is a PERFECT way to introduce D&D to a party of newbies.
Maybe make the child mute (so that they cannot say their own name, escaping the oldest trick in the book) or simply make them very nice to the fairies and respectful of the nature thanks to, idk, a grandma Druid.
If you take the grandma Druid you can make that since she was very rich thanks to her adventures, some bandits kidnapped the child to have for ransom. Then the Grandma, knowing the relationship with the fairies that his grandson had, asked for their help.
For 10+ years a child goes to a forest to play/talk with the fairies there despite local legends of their sadism/cruelty, and afflicting fates worse than death. So when the now 16 y/o child is abducted, the traffickers find out not all local legends are BS when the fairies come for their “pet”.
Magic Item
Sandwich of Chaotic Layers
Description: A sandwich made of suspicious ingredients and a curious amount of cheese, when eaten it gives random effects to character. If it is kept in the inventory long enough it might attract mice and other rodents, if it is kept for even longer at every rest of the character with the Sandwich of Chaotic Layers in their inventory loses 2d12 of HP while those near a radius of 10 ft lose 2d6 of HP after the rest, due to the radiations that the Sandwich of Chaotic Layers emits.
Functionality: Use a bonus action to eat the sandwich, a normal action if you’re size is smaller than Medium, then roll d for the effects.
Results:
You get teleported inside a radius of 5-20 ft not occupied by another creature, you can decide exactly where
The scent of warm bread surrounds the player and up to 5 allies, they heal 2d10 HP and gain 20 Temporary hit points
You get two charges of a garlic scented breath attack that causes confusion and disadvantage to all roles against you and saving throws to all your enemies in a 15 ft cone, but also repel your allies to at least 5 ft from you
A bread wall circles around your enemy and it blocks their vision and movement. To escape your enemy has to deal at least 10 x S of damage, where S is the size of the enemy (1 is Tiny, Medium is 3, Gargantuan 6…), to make a hole big enough to escape
From the mouth of the player comes out a steam of water that deals 4d6 of water damage to those in a line of 20ft in front of the player, with a roll of Athletics higher than 12 the player can move while spitting water to aim to other enemies, this however will deal 2d6 to all enemies hurt instead of 4d6.
A cheese armour surrounds the player, giving them +2 AC but also giving them a -10ft of movement speed
The player’s movement speed doubles but it may randomly oink even after the effect wears off, until they take a rest
Wheel of cheese. For 17 turns. Aka 289 seconds. Aka 4 minutes and 49 seconds. Aka Wheel of cheese for five minutes.
3d4 mice gets teleported in a 5 ft radius from you, you can control them and give them order for 6 turns, after that they’ll become normal mice
A cloud of lint surrounds an enemy, they’ll suffer 2d6 more fire damage if attacked with a fire spell or fire related attacks, the same goes with 1d12 of lightning damage. Until the enemy is surrounded by the lint cloud it gets disadvantage on rolls to hit. The cloud disappear once a fire or lightning attack successfully damage the enemy
A rideable Large cushion of magical focaccia appears in front of the players. The cushion can fly and has 350 HP but no attacks. After receiving 300 HP, reaching a total of 100 ft of movement or after 7 turns the flying focaccia gently lands and then disappear.
3d8 of radiant damage to all creatures in a radius of 35ft from the player (including) the party gets a -10 to the total damage if they have spent at least 2 rests with the Sandwich of Chaos Layers in the inventory of someone.
Inspiration: this silly reblog list ⬇️
Thanks to @garaks-padded-bra @acrowbyanyothername @buglyteeth @imhaley @ronzyponyo @funnywormz @deepestturtlepielover @willowandthesagaofgayyearning @summer-azure @spacetronomyfan @spocktopodes ❤️
Magic Item
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Coffin of Sleep
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Description: a nice coffin with cushions and elegant decorations on the wood, it changes size to accommodate who wants to enter it.
Functionality: if somebody decides to sleep inside the coffin, it will look like they’re dead. Pale skin, no heartbeat, cold body, no response when somebody brings up the dead’s Browser History, no activity, it will also show fake wounds to match the scene. All those who witnessed the character enter the coffin will have +6 to all the rolls that involve in some way the coffin, from creating a fake story of how the character is dead to lifting the coffin hand running with it, no restrictions on charisma rolls either.
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Insurance fraud in D&D babyy
Mount Idea
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Mining War Elephants
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Description: Elephants with tusks that are made of various metals, from iron to mithril and even adamantium, that they can make them spin at high speed to use them as underground drills to mine or to attack their enemies. The material of their tusks resembles their strength and power, every 3 months they fall and new ones reform in two days, in this time the material can change into something weaker or stronger if the strength of the Mining War Elephant has changed, it only depends on how strong the mount has become.
The tusks can also be manually replaced with ones that are made of stronger materials. Creating from 0 new Tusks will take 1d6 days (max 4 if the forger is a Dwarf, max 3 if they’re a blacksmith or an artisan, max 2 if both) to create two tusks, then you need to wait for the Elephant’s tusk to fall naturally, to put the forged tusks into their place, roll both an Animal Handling and a Medicine check, if the result is higher than 14 you succeed, on a lower roll the Elephant will refuse new tusks for 24h because your player hurtled them on accident. (You have two attempts, after that normal tusks will grow and you’ll need to wait 3 months). Only Dwarves can persuade the Mining War Elephants into retrying on the same day after a fail.
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Inspiration: the meme of @dwarf-posting about the epic fact shared by @zinjanthropusboisei (thanks to both!)
View on Twitter
These pictures are killing me
Magic Item Idea
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Short notice Letter
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Description: A letter with a very generic phrase asking for forgiveness advising the recipient that who is writing the letter can’t come to work due to the lack of rest. Paladins and Warlock can use this to restore spell slots. The amount of uses is the same as the number of stamps on the back of the letter, after each use one stamp disappear.
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Functionality: A paladin or a warlock licks their thumb (or any other limb if the thumb is unavailable) and put it on one of the stamps, roll a d20
Results:
1 - The stamp disappear and nothing happens
2/5 - Spell slots under lever 2 gets completely restored
6/9 - Spell slots under level 5 gets completely restored
10/14 - All the spell slots gets completely restored
15/19 - All the spell slots gets completely restored, one spell slot under level 3 gets a temporary +1
20 - All the spell slots gets completely restored, all the spell slots under level 3 gets a temporary +2
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Inspiration: the meme above (Thanks @kimabutch)
I’m sorry, I can’t come into work today. I didn’t get a long rest and god gave me a point of exhaustion. All my skill checks are at disadvantage.
Magic Item
Lucky Hair Bow
Description: an extremely saturated pink hair bow that makes whoever wears it feel prettier. Only a roll higher than 20 on Investigating the Hair Bow will confirm that the Hair Bow is magic, otherwise it looks like a normal Hair Bow.
Functionality: +2 to Charisma score. Every time you have to roll 1 or more d100, you roll 2 more d100s, you can choose the result between the options (you can choose only a number of results equal to the original number of dices to roll).
Example: Astarion rolls 3d100, then rolls 2d100 thanks to his Lucky Hair Bow, the results:
Obtain 25 gp
You lose all your spell slots of level 3 and higher
Obtain 25 gp
In your next encounter you get +3 initiative.
You get teleported into the Plane from where you where born, if you already are there you get teleported into a random level of the Nine Hells
Annie (the player who plays Astarion) obviously chooses to obtain 50 gp and the +3 initiative, so 3 options like the 3d100 she had to roll originally.
The choice will be done by the player, but the character will think of it as a strike of good luck and say that it’s all thanks to their lucky hair bow. It is.
Inspiration: The remix of the song “Lucky” from the “Lucky Twice”, “Lucky (I'm So Lucky Lucky)” …yes the Nightcore remix …yes I’m transfem …yes I’ve got 30 different versions into the same Spotify playlist except the original
Magic Item
Kobold Bank
Description: A small Kobold made of porcelain, you can put coins in there and it will possibly add a few more when you collect them.
Functionality: Xd4 - (X/2) Where X is the total of coins you put inside the Kobold Bank. To function, X needs to be an even number, if you shake the Kobold Bank and X is an odd number you roll 1d4
1= nothing comes out
2= Only half of X comes out
3= 2/3 of X come out (round down)
4= X coins come out
Inspiration: The meme above (thanks @piratequeen1017)
Campaign Idea:
God’s Plan
Plot: The party finds a quest to kill a God, that in the quest is described as useless and incapable, and as reward they could obtain the God’s powers and title (the quest is enchanted in a way that only those that have a non-Evil alignment can read it)
They found the God, VERY quickly and slowly realise that the deity is the one who wrote the quest, after falling in a deep depression due to the lack of followers. The party’s new objective will be to be the therapists of the God while spreading their name and doing good deeds in their honour, becoming the God’s first paladins after a long time of loneliness.
Inspiration: The meme above (thanks @jodetesuciaperra)
Campaign Idea
Lord of the Ribs
Plot: An Elven King calls the players to ask for their help. Their mission is to destroy the One Spice, a powerful magic object that made all the spices feel bland except for those that the owner of the One Spice, Sauronion, sold. This new group will start a journey trough Mordough fighting with Sauronion’s minions like the Nugzuls (or Wingwraiths) and Soyruman The Bland. When the Fellowship of the Rib finally finds itself in front of the Onion Ring, a powerful spell that Sauronion uses to look down on the Middle Eat, they’ll have to fight the army of Sauronion and then take the One Spice to Mount Nom and destroy it, to make the world spicy again.
Inspiration: I think it’s pretty obvious, but in case it wasn’t, I came up with this completely alone and without being inspired by any product of other people. Those who don’t believe me are French (fries)
Silly Character
Race: Mimic
Class: Druid (Circle of The Moon)
Description: A mimic who can turn into animals too. Has learnt Common by living for a bit with human farmers as a cat (to eat the mouses)
Name: Sparklefluffy Whiskertoes
Inspiration: I just wanted a funny first-character for my trans best friend who is in love with shapeshifting
Magic Item or Spell
Temporary Sacrifice
Effect: The user use all their magic and put it into an object, losing the ability to use magic in any way, receiving tho a +2 into their stats, +5 to hit, +1d12 to any attack they deal. If they die they loose these bonuses but after 24h from their death they return in a 5ft radius from the object that then retrieves all the magic stored and breaks. If after 24h they aren’t dead yet, they roll a d20, on a Nat20 they get 24h more hours, if they roll anything else they die on the spot and everything returns at normal.
The equipment that the player wore at death is teleported with them, their weapon/s too even if it slipped from their hands at death.
After being teleported the player rolls a [(LevelOfTheCharacter) +3]d4, they lose that amount of Max HP until they have a long rest
Notes: If it’s a spell then the object will be decided by the character, if it’s a magic item then that’s the object where the user magic will be stored.
When the dead return into a 5ft radius from the object, the object breaks only if it was a Magic Item. In case it was a spell, the cool-down is 1 year.
Inspiration: The Viking of Stamford Bridge
Magic Item
The Blindfold of Faith
Description: An indestructible Blindfold that a paladin can wear when their deity thinks that they’re slowly breaking the oath or simply when they want to prove their deity of how much they have faith in them.
Stats: When a paladin put the blindfold on they obtain +5 Wisdom, +1 Dexterity. If the passive perception of the paladin (with the +5 Wisdom) is lower than 15, the +1 Dexterity turns into an +2 Passive Perception.
Abilities:
Blind faith: two times per short rest the paladin can pray and take 4d6 slashing damage, their eyes starts to bleed under the blindfold, but for the next 6 rounds their magic attacks that deal radiant damage and those who their deity gave them, deal an additional 2d6 slashing damage and a bonus 3d4 force damage if the enemy has eyes.
Sacrilege: since the Blindfold is indestructible and sacred, the only way to take it off is if the paladin willingly choose to do so. If the deity thinks that it’s too soon because the paladin didn’t prove completely their faith, the deity can punish them. (Remember that taking off the blindfold obviously makes you lose the stats bonuses, even after proving your faith)
-2 to Wisdom, -1 to the other stats
-5 wisdom, -2 Constitution
-7 Wisdom, -5 Constituion
-7 Wisdom, -7 Constitution, -5 Passive Perception
-7 Wisdom, -7 Constitution, -7 Passive Perception, -2d6 to hit or -2d6 damage dealt to enemies whatever the type (if the damage roll is lower this become -2d4, if lower it does nothing)
-7 Wisdom, -7 Constitution, -7 Passive Perception, -2d6 to hit, -2d6 damage dealt to enemies whatever the type (if the damage roll is lower this become -2d4, if lower it does nothing)
The punishment will be decided by the D(eity)M.
In case the -2d6 damage will make the damage 0 or lower, the damage dealt will be 1 x N, where N is the number of types that the original attack dealt, ex: if the attack normally deals radiant and bludgeoning it’s 1 x 2 = 2)
Inspiration: I played after a long time a paladin on Foundry, but had a problem where I saw everything white, plus the DM for no reason decided that my deity (Tyr) didn’t like me for something that I did (I didn’t do anything but okay), so I said “Hey, it would be cool if my character blinded himself to try to regain Tyr’s approval”. The DM stopped DMing that campaign before I could try that :(
Oneshot / Campaign idea:
Hydration
Plot: The players meet an Hydra in the middle of the desert, wounded and burned, she begs for help to return to a place with enough water for her to live peacefully. Your player can see that: some of her scales are missing and the skin is burning red due to the sun, the Hydra can’t move on it’s own because her legs were cut, then a metal disc was placed on the burnt meat and finally sealed with long nails into the legs of the Hydra, the number of her head is significantly higher than what expected because to survive the heads had to eat each other.
The Hydra tried to move with her heads but it’s simply too difficult and dangerous since the sand burns too.
Give to one of the player a magic compass to know where to find a large body of water or make that they just know that.
The Hydra can speak Common, because she learnt it when she was little.
The Hydra is now Neutral Good, because she was sent into the desert by a sorcerer who put her there for torture for what she did to his village, now she’s sorry and aims to become a better Hydra.
You can choose the name of the Hydra, make the players decide because she never had one or call her Varixia or Molly
If they help her the Hydra will give them:
Her blood (= health potions), All the scales that fall due to the sun (=armor material), the teeth of the heads that the others will eat (=arrow head or jewellery), the heads of the eaten parts (If kept like normally it can sell high because it’s a valuable trophy, but it can even be modified a bit with the help of the Hydra to make it a powerful shield that one time per round can use a bonus action of the holder to bite an enemy in a 5ft radius).
And the players will be able to eat with the Hydra (yes, eat the Hydra’s heads, but she’s cool with it)
Inspiration:
Hydras are described as reptiles, roam around places with water like swamps and have a swim speed of 30ft.
Not Dyson related buuuuuttt
PATHFINDER/D&D CHARACTER WOOOAAHHHH
Everything stays, but it still changes
Hello! We've just started a D&D server and are looking for more players and hopefully some DMs so we can host campaigns! If you're interested in joining, feel free to pop in! We don't have a campaign yet either. This server is small as of now, so any members are welcome! If you don't wanna play but just wanna watch and talk about D&D, that's fine too!
I miss playing D&D so much! It's been years, and the last time I played it, I had my campaign destroyed by a vindictive second DM that I didn't know was angry with me until it was too late (I blame my autism for somehow not reading that on them)... now that my life is more stable without vindictive assholes in it, I want to maybe try again. I found my old notes from a campaign I designed completely myself, and I'm thinking about designing a reboot or making an entirely new campaign just for fun! I missed the chaos and the silly banter, and I can't wait to revive my best character(s) and lay waste to my enemies as a druidic bard, or maybe I'll try monk or paladin again⚔️
My Shadar–Kai character, Morta for Artfright! (Btw the mask is the left side, she’s just tattooed on the right lol)
Ascent out of Avernus
MY NAMESAKE!!! Basically the first D&D campaign I ever fully played! In which I used the power of friendship to get out of every scenario and am no longer allowed to collect friends like Pokemon cards :,D
From left to right, top row: Apollo (Polly) Wanderlust (an NPC who became my second character), Trexel (PC who formed a polycyle), Feonor (Trexels GF), Lulu, Bitter Breath (Trexels partner), Zariel, Charlie (PC) bottom row: William (PC. Yes that is the hand of Vecna), Brim (PC), Americ, Thurstwell and Mortlock Vanthamper (my best friend NPCs), Adaman (Me!!!) and Morty the imp on Ada’s head.
Made in Feb 2023 to celebrate completion of the campaign
My D&D characters
this isn’t even a comprehensive list. I made this last year and now this is like a fourth of them all.
From left to right: Adaman Neptune, Cash Silvermoon, Cory Coldsword, Mel Stoneroll, Petrichor, Adrian Alderstar, Ceil the Heretic, Apollo Wanderlust, Corvid, Crovan Metalthorn, Arson, Tahlia Maverick, Fawkes very long name the III, Leif, Percival Lyllan, Emerson Foxglove, Janus Flimly, Venus Holyglow and Paris St. Cannon
PLEASE feel free to ask about them all because there’s so much too them all but if I added that all this post would be SO LONG so yeah
Mel Stoneroll
Drawn in October of 2023
One of my favorite D&D characters! Mel’s pretty much your stereotypical bard - quite petty, pretty flirtatious, very likely to be the reason the party is thrown out of the inn. There’s some actual depth and backstory there, but for the most part he’s just a bastard /affectionate
For those who care, he’s an Eladrin college of whispers bard with the urchin background (his rat’s name is Freddy) he’s currently a level 16 I believe
Yes his last name is a Rolling Stones reference. Idk why I did it.
![First // Latest Merle :]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d6ce9cce758a0261e901c445851801d8/774701223db28b1c-b8/s500x750/df90f51d2472f5a5efa8f7376d5bc0d227b11919.png)
![First // Latest Merle :]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/239df57b9e91ba82dc8815c28346ad19/774701223db28b1c-ae/s500x750/e479a529125242da0db74187b2126e377fafd611.jpg)
First // latest Merle :]
Another Tes, for your viewing pleasure. I need to dig up some really old D&D drawings cuz I’m sure I have a very very old “Tes” illustration from before I ever even played D&D.
An Amazon purchase, a 3D print that I painted up for our Lost Mines D&D 5E campaign. The second floor has an area for gaming (I decided) here you can see Texas Hold-Em, Roulette, and of course…. BLOOD BOWL!