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L: The first rule of magic duels is don't get into magic duels. The second is to remain calm; if ya lose your s***e, ya soon won't have s***e left to lose.
The first to move is Tanglepork. Dodging an opportune swipe of Ioana's claws as she runs away, she reloads her gun. She quickly turns and fires, but her nerves betray her and the bullet barely misses the lycan's head.
Ioana's fierce gaze remains locked on her prey as she commands the air to twist around her. It becomes like a miniature tornado as she chases after the gnome.
Gudrun locks eyes with the minotaur. "Obey me," she says, her eyes alight.
L: The third rule of magic duels is to know what your opponent can do and prepare to counter it.
"Not this time, b***h," says Honeycrisp, shaking off the force trying to insert itself into his mind.
Gudrun pulls out a silver wand. "Fine."
Honeycrisp focuses and magic courses through his body, accelerating him. Sparks dance upon his horns.
L: Corollary: Know what your opponent knows ya can do and don't do it.
Ling raises a wall of ribs, splitting a third of the room away, isolating the lycan and the deputy from the rest of them. The massive ribs connecting ceiling to floor have gaps too small for most of the room's occupants. "This way, Porky," commands Ling, as she positions herself by the passage to the portal room.
J: How many wall of bones spells do there really need to be?
"Ling," whines Zingiber, "You're supposed to be fighting me." She releases a blast of glittery fire into Ling's face, but the gex licks her eyes clean.
Tanglepork takes a liking to the idea of people not seeing things and turns invisible, then attempts to sneak around Ioana to reach the bone wall. Her steps are calculated to match the rhythm of the other fighters.
Ioana sniffs about and detonates a burst of fire where she believes the gnome to be hiding, but by some gnomish trickery (possibly breakdancing), the deputy remains unharmed.
Gudrun fires a purple beam from her wand, but Honeycrisp defects it with his horn. "S***e," she says, calmly. Foreseeing the sheriff's next move, she conjures a shield in front of her.
Honeycrisp charges forward, his horns smash open the shield. While his target is unharmed by that, the hook to her face makes quite the impact, knocking free a tooth, which explodes. The shrapnel then defies physics and embed themselves in the dwarf's neck.
Ling conjures a facsimile of a dryad -a type of tree nymph- that wraps her arms around the elf. "Hey there, cutie," says the dryad with a wink.
L: Preventing your opponent from casting at all is the strongest option. A lot of magic requires somantics.
Zingiber forces an arm free. "Getting off on this, Dr. Ling?" She gestures wildly. "Then check this!"
Unfortunately for Zingiber, her spell fails for multiple reasons: Tanglepork is out of the area, Honeycrisp (bull) and the dryad (plant) don't have the targeted anatomy, and Ling, because of her experiences in Wizard School, always begins the day with protective spells like Genital Mirror Shield. Thus, the caster herself is the only affected person.
Zingiber clutches her guts as her Ovarian Explosion nearly rips apart her insides. "Mistake."
J: Who even crafted that? Why make that?
"Serves ya right," shouts Ling.
Invisible, Tanglepork sneaks up to the ribs while quietly reloading her weapon and squeezes through. Aiming back through, she takes another shot breaking her disguise. The bullet, buffeted by the wind, glances the lycan's shoulder. "Oh, come on," the deputy grumbles.
If Ioana were the beast she looked like, she'd just run up to the ribs and try to smash through, but the witch is smarter than that. The bones form a fence she can cast through and, with the wind making her a difficult target, she's free to do so. She condenses a suffocating cloud around the gnome. "You can't escape," she growls.
"Help me," demands Gudrun to Zingiber, taking a defensive step away. She locks eyes with Ling and a mental bomb causes her to recoil in pain.
J: How many counters do you have? L: One more than I think I'll need.
"Time to put you b***hes in your place," says Honeycrisp.
"Can you shut your f**king mouth for five b****y minutes!" yells Ling.
"Great idea!" Honeycrisp forms a zone of silence around himself and lunges headfirst into Gudrun, impaling her on his horns and lifting her off the ground.
L: A lot of magic requires incantations too.
Now unable to hear, the false dryad looks to Ling for instruction. Ling gestures for her to keep Zingiber in that area close to the sheriff. Ling then condenses the cloud around the deputy into a shield of water.
Zingiber punches and knees the dryad, bashing onto bark-coated flesh. Breaking free, she scrambles out of the inaudible zone.
Tanglepork peers around the shield (reloading) and focuses on that first bullet, the one that's still in the back of the lycan's skull. The tiny piece of lead becomes hotter, burning its way into the witch's brain.
Screeching with pain, Ioana draws in through the floor as much spiritual energy as she can. The sheriff cannot avoid having part of his soul drained and the dryad wilts, while Tanglepork's fidgeting about causes her to be less effected and Ling avoids it entirely by hopping onto the wall, taking note that Zingiber is casually unaffected.
Gudrun thrashes about, desperately trying to free herself from the horns. Her punches and kicks are not enough, however.
A bright light flashes the room as Honeycrisp channels electricity through his horns and Gudrun's body. He then charges at Zingiber slapping her across the room with her dwarven cohort's charred, but still living body.
L: Anything is a weapon. Everything is a weapon.
Ling takes a moment to think. Two of these witches should be dead now; why aren't they? It must be that contract. She commands the weakened dryad to grab the elf again (which she does). Ling yells, "Porky, we need to leave."
Zingiber once again forces her arms free to aim another spell and then shoves the dryad away. The sheriff collapses as his muscles detach themselves from his bones. Ling recognizes her own spell, Tendon Tearer.
As Tanglepork continues to burn a hole through Ioana's head, she yells to Ling, "How?" She takes another shot from the other side of the shield, sinking a bullet into the lycan's chest. "Eat that!"
Ioana retreats to the entrance door, as if daring her enemies to try to get through her. She stomps on the ground, causing the already misshapen cubes of the room to twist around becoming a series of crude pyramids. Now even just standing here is an issue.
Gudrun pries her body off of the sheriff's horns and pathetically crawls away. Her bleeding, burnt body struggling to cross the threshold of sound due to the floor's sudden shift.
Honeycrisp sends a message via vibration directly through the floor and wall to Ling's ear bones. While she doesn't know the exact meaning, it isn't hard to guess the intent.
J: Why would you keep saving him? L: Because it's the right thing to do. A: Meat shield.
Ling restores the sheriff's ability to move -his muscles reattaching themselves- and orders the dryad to muzzle the elf; the dryad's solution is to shove her hand into Zingiber's mouth.
Zingiber bites the hand and pulls a brown jewel out of her robe. She stabs it into the dryad's ear and detonates it. The dryad's mostly headless body dissipates.
Tanglepork pulls a glass bottle out of her pocket and lodges it into the barrel of her gun. The special bottle is launched by the force of her shot and explodes on impact with the lycan, whose whirling winds erupt into flame. "Give up already!"
Ioana quickly draws the moisture in the air (and the water shield) onto her person, suffocating the fire. Realizing her wind had burned away, she conjures a shield to deflect further gunfire.
Gudrun crawls further from the sheriff and attempts to scramble his brain, but cannot tell what effect she actually has.
Honeycrisp leaps with intent to crush the elf, but his vision is blurred and wobbly like a drunkard, and he smashes his fist centimeters away from her head. She weaves around the following blows.
Ling continues to rack her brain. She kicks off a burst of mental energy, accelerating her thoughts. Zingiber mentioned several construction-related spells and this lair is blatantly artificial, that entity needs mortals to interact with this world, and the witches seemed to have thought that sacrificing children into the portal was the point. ...Maybe they built the portal? So, having them harm it would break the contract?
"Porky, this way," she yells as she forms an arrow of light pointing to herself in front of Honeycrisp, "Pull back!" Ling hopes that the witches will follow after them.
While Honeycrisp is distracted, Zingiber sees an opportunity. The sheriff's horns are covered in her friend's blood. Reaching up and grabbing them, the elf drives the blood like knives into his skin and rips his face off.
A: I like this woman. Obviously became a demon.
"You f**king b***h!" Tanglepork's rage cannot penetrate the muted bubble the elf remains in, but her bullet can, barely grazing Zingiber's nose.
"Time to end this," says Ioana, teleporting right behind the deputy. A swipe of her claw slices open the gnome's backside.
"Help me," calls out Gudrun, putting pressure on her bleeding wounds. She tries to lock eyes with the deputy, but the gnome is too wrought with emotion.
Bleeding profusely, Honeycrisp slams his fists into the elf's guts, sparks passing through her organs with each strike.
"Can't get near the k**bhead," Ling grumbles. She calls upon the sheriff's flesh to mend itself, stealing pieces of Zingiber's hands in the process.
Zingiber dodges another swing as she rolls out of the silent bubble and does a wild swinging display spraying her own blood about into floating runes that drive themselves into the sheriff. On contact, the pieces of herself stuck in his face explode, taking his head with them.
Screaming with rage and grief, Tanglepork races toward Ling across the crooked, spiky floor and tries to shoot the blood-dancing elf. The bullet comes nowhere close.
Ioana chases after and commands pieces of the stone floor to erupt as a cage around the gnome, but the agile deputy leaps to freedom.
"Stop," demands Gudrun, but the deputy refuses.
L: But the most important rule of a magic duel is:
"We're getting the kids," yells Ling, ostensibly to Tanglepork, "And then we're getting the f**k out of here." She conjures a massive potato to block the lycan's path.
"No, you're not," yells Zingiber forming further runes. With a great forceful push, the corpse of the sheriff is launched at the doctor, who dives out of the way. The body tumbles into the corridor and explodes, collapsing the tunnel.
L: Never forget why you're fighting.
"Zingiber, you fool!" yells Ioana, but it is too late.
From the liquid metal in Ioana's brain and the burnt, ruptured organs in Gudrun's body, the two die with no fanfare.
"What?" Zingiber staggers forward in confusion, the blood-loss killing her slowly. "That's not fair."
Tanglepork stops running. Ling and she carefully walk toward Zingiber. "You killed my boss," says Tanglepork, out of breath.
"Whatever," says Zingiber, focusing on Ling, "Going to kill me, Ling? Plenty of ways to make me suffer. You could sta-"
"I'm talking to you," says the deputy.
"I don't want y-"
The deputy helps Zingiber paint the ceiling a delightful new shade of pink.
"Bl'ell, Porky," mutters Ling, "You didn't-"
"It's over." Tanglepork sits down.
Ling turns to the collapsed passage. "I'll get the kids..." She looks around at the bloody mess that was once three witches. "...And ya... deal with this?"
The lycan, Ioana, stands in her nightgown wearing a simple jacket, Ling's wig in hand. "What is going on down here?"
"Oi, my hair." Ling holds up her hands in front of her, inviting Ioana to throw it her way. "Thanks for that."
"Deputy, where are the others?" asks the sheriff, "Also, my knife?"
"I'm the only one, sir," says Tanglepork, saluting, "And it's in the pond, sir."
"Then why didn't you grab it?"
"The fair lady will only give it to its owner: you."
"A man's got to do everything around here."
"Shove it, mate," says Ling, adjusting her wig, "First is the witches. We con-"
"Oh, new guests!" shouts Zingiber, twitching with excitement, Gudrun right behind her.
"Which one do ya want, Doctor?" asks Gudrun, "Ya've earned it."
"The bl'ell are ya spouting now?" yells Ling.
"Wait, who's what?" sputters Tanglepork.
"Deputy, get the men," says Honeycrisp, his nostrils flaring, "I'll handle this brainjacking b***h."
"Ya took control of him?" asks Gudrun.
"Are you throwing us under the cart?" asks Zingiber.
"Officer," whispers Ioana to Tanglepork without looking away from the witches, "I think we need to get out of here."
"What are ya trying to pull, Gudrun?" Ling adjusts her cloak.
"Porky." "Deputy." "Officer." "Gnome." "Little thing." The voices blended together, contradictory commands overlapping pulling the gnome's attention apart in a dizzying cacophony.
"Oh," says Ioana, stumbling forward, "Why?"
Tanglepork's gunhand trembles as she stares into the hole in the back of Ioana's head. "Do you think I'm stupid?"
"Yes," growls Ioana, turning to face her attacker, her face contorting savagely, "I do."
"Why did you do that, idiot?" barks Honeycrisp, "You really trying to kill an eldritch witch with a gun?"
"Bl'ell, everyone wait," says Ling, "I talked to your boss, witches. The kids are alive; we can work this out."
All attention turns to the doctor.
"Why would you trust it?" asks Honeycrisp, "The thing's helping these-"
"It said... something that meant it was talking to the kids," says Ling, nervously, "Or, at least, knew them."
"Is this about the brat you're selling drugs to?"
"I'm not selling drugs."
"Right," says Honeycrisp, "Giving drugs to."
"Not the time, Sheriff."
J: Why didn't you ever just use that surgery spell you crafted on her? L: Because she didn't want it? J: ...Valid.
Zingiber interrupts. "Oh, if they're still alive, we can kill them ourselves!"
"The screaming was nice," says Gudrun, fondly, "We can make a whole choir this time."
"Hate to waste that meat," mutters Ioana.
"What is wrong with ya?" yells Ling, "I'm trying to get ya c**ts out of this!"
"If you think I'm letting these c**ts go," yells Honeycrisp, "You'd best be ready to share a grave with 'em!"
"Ugh, so glad my son doesn't talk like this," mutters Gudrun as the doctor and the sheriff resume cussing each other out. She turns to her elven cohort. "Ioana's got the gnome, I'll take Captain Bulls***e, and-"
"Dr. Ling will feed me my own a**e," says Zingiber with a chipper enthusiasm more appropriate for boarding a carnival ride.
"Or ya could try winning," says Gudrun, exasperated.
"Love the confidence, and I will try," says Zingiber, "But she's going to destroy me, just like she did earlier."
The deputy is unfortunately not forgotten in this mess. The lycan looms over her. What they have to say transcends language, visible by a glance: Ioana expresses an intent to eat and Tanglepork expresses a need to change her pants.
And thus, the fight begins.
"Listen fast," says Ling to the still dazed minotaur, "The kids are alive, there's one witch coming, and the second's getting the third. I've infily'ed their coven and ya're brainwashed. Play along."
Sheriff Honeycrisp has several questions. Unfortunately for him, Zingiber footsteps were slowly growing louder. He lies back into the junk pile, feigning unconsciousness.
"Water for the lady." Zingiber presents a chalice to Ling as if it contained wine or nectar.
"Thanks, mate." Ling chugs it immediately.
"Ready to see my work?" Zingiber sways with glee. "My latest I call Marrow Radiance."
"Can ya make him do stuff?" Ling puts the empty cup down.
"Oh," says Zingiber, deflating, "Like what?"
"I was just wondering if ya knew mind s***e."
"That's Gudrun's thing."
"So, she had him blame someone in town, then?"
Zingiber giggles, "Sort of. She let him just pick someone who'd fit."
"Really now." Ling resists the negative urges rising in the back of her mind. 'Think of the kids, Ling,' she thinks to herself.
"Sheriff, walk to the main room," Zingiber commands, "Any ideas, Dr.?"
Honeycrisp rises and stumbles his way out, quietly grumbling all the while.
As the ladies follow him, Ling asks, "I thought coven's shared magic. Are ya all studying extra things?"
"Yeah, the coven stuff is mostly utility: reshaping land, portals, material conversion."
"Sounds like your boss wants a construction crew," says Ling, carefully navigating the misshaped hall, "Any idea why?"
Zingiber shrugs. It wasn't going to be that easy.
"Can ya make the sheriff do cartwheels?"
"Yeah, but why?" asks Zingiber, "I can do soooo much worse."
"Gotta start small, mate," says Ling as they enter the main room again. "If ya do your big evil s***e now, how do ya top it?"
"Point taken," sings Zingiber, "Alright, moo-man, do s-"
"Zinj, I need to talk to ya," says Gudrun, standing by another door. She scowls at Ling. "In private." She looks to the sheriff. "Watch the doctor," she commands.
"Sure, what's up?" Zingiber dances across the room and follows her coven-mate into the darkness.
"Cartwheels, really?" angrily whispers Honeycrisp.
"Ya want her to pull your skeleton out your a**e?" whispers back Ling, "That one's a loon."
"All you b***hes are loons," says Honeycrisp, "Chaotic w***es the lot of you."
"Ya got a f**king problem, mate?"
"Yeah, c**ts like you!" shouts the sheriff.
"Of course, they do, b*****d," shouts back Ling, "They wouldn't hate ya if ya'd stop being a sack of s***e!"
"You diseased s**t!" Honeycrisp steps forward, his figure towering Ling. "Just here to bang the kidnappers."
"B****y f**kwit!" Ling stands as tall as can, glaring into his eyes. "Just mad ya've been saved by a woman; ya hate us so much."
"You barely count as a woman, p***y-sucking lizard."
"Says the cuckold farm animal!"
"What is this language?" asks Ioana, who had slipped into the room unseen.
"Wow," mutters the diminutive deputy behind her.
The shady little lady suddenly grew twice as large. Her outfit pulls apart as she returns to her natural size, exposing scaly limbs and belly. The dark cloak is barely a cape now. The gex licks her own eyes. "G'day, mate," she says, "This do?"
Dr. Ling puts her claw on the fake lycan, whose image fades away, leaving only a blonde gnome guardswoman behind.
"Sorry for wearing your daughter's face, Ma'am," says Tanglepork, "But we had to make sure the trail was safe."
"Why wouldn't it be?" Ioana squints her eyes.
"Chil-"
"Claims of a strange svelte man lurking out here," says Ling, "Leaving messages about."
"Oh, him," says Ioana, opening her door wide, thus allowing to see her fully. An elderly lycan, her fur is greying in numerous places. She is clad in a thick pastel floral-print nightgown. "Come in, dears."
They do.
The old cabin is decorated in many old furs, hunting trophies, and small bookcases. It is divided into three rooms a simple kitchen, a comfy bedroom, and the main room with a rocking chair and a stool by a fireplace.
The elderly lycan sits in the rocking chair as Ling closes the door behind her. "Come, sit," she says.
Tanglepork sits on the stool, while Ling manifests a bone chair.
"Now, what's this about that night creeper?" asks Ioana, "What has he done?"
"We're not certain yet," says Tanglepork, "But we suspect him of the kidnapping, or worse, of several children."
"Ya wouldn't have seen any kids of late, right?" asks Ling.
"No, only my little Loomy," says Ioana, rocking, "Last week exactly."
"How long has Note-boy been out here?" asks Ling.
"And what's he look like?" asks Tanglepork.
"Less than a week," says Ioana, "He's a tall elvenoid — twice an elf, in fact — in a fancy suit, like from the old cities, but his face: it's wrong." She rubs her paws on her face. "He looks like you- er, like whoever is looking at him."
Ling leans to the side and asks, "So ya've spoken to someone who's seen him too?"
Ioana face droops. "Y-yes, a few neighbors."
"Can you tell us where these neighbors live?" asks Tanglepork, "The woods are pre~tty~ big."
"Of course, I can, dears," says Ioana, eyeing them with a sigh, "But it's so lonely being so far out here. Could you stay a while longer?"
J: Mum, tell me you didn't. L: Does it really surprise ya...
"I assume ya've checked with the few dwarves in town already?" asks Ling, pulling a pair of chairs out of the ground.
"Yeah," says Tanglepork, "None of them were hiring kobold kids for anything." She sits down. "So, it doesn't help."
"It does," says Ling, "At minimum, this dwarf comes near town every couple days. Likely lives nearby."
"That could still mean anything," says Tanglepork, annoyed, "Woodsman, hunter, bandit, merchant."
"So who'd hire a pair of schoolgirls?" asks Ling, "And for what?"
"Why are you so focused on this one?"
"If we know where this dwarf is, then we have a direction to start looking," says Ling, rubbing her temples, "Those two are the only clue ya've given me."
"We can't even confirm if this dwarf is real, Ling," says the deputy, shaking her head, "We've narrowed it down to only one possibility: the kids walked out of town. No magic residue, no un-alibi-ed adults, no signs of violence, nothing."
A: What's the point of this? If the wolf was killing kids, just say that. L: Who said she did? J: The story of us meeting on an eldritch cruise started with me doing a drug deal in the woods; give her a chance to set this up right.
"So why'ren't ya searching the bush then," asks Ling, "Why is the most secure exit being blamed? Something magical obvy happened to those kids, we just need to find where."
"We've already asked all of the parents," says Tanglepork as she sets her notes aside, "And none of the other kids are saying anything either. The only thing we could do is search blindly."
The two sit in silence for a moment.
"What if the culprit came to us?" asks Ling. As Tanglepork's eyebrow raises, Ling asks, "Any other kids leave town on the regular?"
"Tanglepork flips through her notes. "There's a little lycan who visits her grandmother every week," she says, "But we've told her parents not to let her while we're investigating."
J: Why would the sheriff bother if you're being blamed? L: Because if she went missing in the woods, that would mean... J: Understood, not the Underdank. Town would force the sheriff's hand. L: Town would've the sheriff's head.
"Does Nana Lycan know?"
"...no..."
"Then I've an idea."
Deputy Tanglepork steps inside, but hesitates. "Is that safe?" she asks of the glowing crystals lighting the room.
"Yeah," says Ling, "Ya want to stay outside?" Ling gestures and a bubble forms around the pair, both in and out of her house.
"What is this?" The deputy looks about in awe of the shimmering shield and the distorted view of the world outside.
"Privacy bubble: people can't see or hear through it."
"That sounds threatening," says Tanglepork, "And probably illegal."
"Not yet it isn't," says Ling, sticking her hand out and in the bubble, "But I get it. Fortunately, my own invention; haven't taught a soul." She returns her focus to the deputy. "Now, why ya here?"
J: She really called that one. L: Strewth, I'm impressed ya figured it out on your own.
"I need to know who's entered and exited the Underdank."
"I gave those file to the sheriff," says Ling, irritation rising in her voice, "I just said that."
"There are children missing, Ling," says Tanglepork, looking her dead in the eye. "The sheriff is blaming you."
"Sprogs on walkabout and that c**t's playing blamsies?" growls Ling, "What are your leads? Macca's way or Splish-Splash?"
"Can you... repeat that?" asks Tanglepork.
Ling takes a deep breath, "If the sheriff's not looking for the kids, then I will. So, what are your other leads? Could they have gone past Old McDonald's farm or Splish-Splash River? Whose tykes are missing, too?"
"You wanna help?" says Tanglepork, taking out a notepad, "Okay, yes, it's six kids, maybe seven."
"Maybe seven?"
"Sheriff's not counting Matches."
"Who's that?"
"Homeless orphan, lurked around the other side of town for about half a month. May be unrelated."
Ling sighs. "Next time ya know someone who might be starving, send them my way."
"Will do." The deputy begins reading her notes. "First, we have Hanzy and Grater, Toothfist's kids; last seen leaving school last week. Never made it home."
"Goblins," says Ling, "That's why it's taken this long to notice. Hanzy's the one with the weird spiky growths."
"Second, Graupel and Rosen Rotweiss, twin kobolds, allegedly assisting 'a dwarf' every couple days, disappeared earlier this week."
"Any I.D. on this 'dwarf'?"
"Not yet. Vague enough to be in any direction too... including the Underdank."
Ling shakes her head; it's not worth commenting on.
"Third, Gene Geneson Jr., parents claim he ran away a few days ago."
"Genette? Yeah, I can take a swing at why she'd do that."
Tanglepork checks her notes, "She?"
"Not your business," waves Ling, "Shouldn't have said it. Regardless, possibly our 'dwarf.'"
"Uh, finally, Loxi Goldberry, mayor's niece, went out looking for Gene yesterday."
J: Oh, Loxi... A: Who is she? J: Nothing, no one really. L: Jevoi's first crush. She was in tatters when Loxi and Genette started dating. J: I was not! D: I thought it was Gank. J: That is also false.
"There we go," says Ling, "The reason the sheriff's acting now. Have anything from the kids? Hair or nails?"
"I know what your thinking," says Tanglepork, pulling a pink hairbrush out of her bag; it is covered in blonde elven hair, "We already tried this."
"That's curious," says Ling, snatching the brush, "But let me try first."
Ling focuses on the girl's discarded hair and sends a pulse of magic through the world. There is no reaction from anything.
"Told you," says Tanglepork.
"This is a big clue," says Ling. Noticing the deputy's confusion, she continues, "If the location pulse isn't detecting her, it means something, or someone, is actively blocking it."
"Or she's not on this plane of reality."
"Both directions worth looking into," says Ling, handing the brush back, "Anything for the other kids, just to be certain?"
L: We checked; no signal for any of them, not even Matches.
L: Less than a year after the worm incident, I's in my lab working. Jevoi was off playing with Gank, when I had a visitor.
In the lab-cum-store sits twenty potted pepper plants across four tables with protective domes. Each table has the same arrangement of five different types pepper. Between each set, stands a different colored glowing crystal; between the tables, a cross wall containing safely coated lead plates.
Dr. Ling sits at her counter with a red pepper cut open on a tray, seeds carefully extracted in a pile. Her writing notes for each plant's current condition and exposure schedule next to it.
"After three weeks, the peppers appear to be unchanged externally under the red light," she mutters to herself, "But the seeds have grown in size. Taste testing will need to be redone."
She sighs, for she is unable to taste a difference in these supposedly hot peppers. The capsaicinoids have no effect on her, nor her current assistants, but to the mammals it was intended to repel, its flavor is valued highly. If the taste is too different, or worse, unpalatable, her work will never be accepted; it's already hard enough to assure most people that her food is safe. Sure, goblins will eat anything, but elves and dwarves? They have standards, traditions. No matter what affects she's had politically, she still had to fight for every plant, for every scrap of funding. Three steps forward, two steps back, until she dies. A never-ending-
The sudden rapping on her door awakens Ling from her thoughts. The stress is getting to her again. She walks to the door, preparing how she'll react. Is this for passage or medicine? 'Or maybe love?' hopes Ling. She opens the door slowly. "Who's it?"
Standing outside Ling's house is a uniformed gnome woman. The curly haired cutie is someone Ling vaguely recognizes, "Good eve~ning~, Dr. Ling," she says.
"Tanglepork?" Ling asks, "I already gave your boss my files. Did ya come just to come?" She licks one eye in her approximation of a wink.
"That's Deputy Tanglepork, now," says the gnome, gesturing to her badge. "I need to ask you a few questions; it's serious. May I?"
"Come on in, Porky," says Ling, "Need a break from plants."