Jungkook Fanfiction - Blog Posts

softcore, jjk

you want to push him so that he fucked you rough until you squirted

⇥ pairing : idol!jungkook x headstaff!reader

⇥ genre : smut, fluff (a bit)

⇥ words : 8.5k

⇥ reference : jungkook 

⇥ warnings : dom!jungkook, bigcock!jungkook, bratty!reader, rough-sex, unprotected sex, dirty talk, spank, edging, overstimulation, oral (both), fingering, penetrate, kinky, punishment, thigh riding, breath play, biting, hair pulling, hickeys, nipple play, doggy style, public sex

⇥ side note : hey hi, happy holidays! i received so much love on my other smut, you guys seemed to love when the sex gets a little bit too rough and hardcore so i made this one since my mind got flooded with a lot of ideas and i will be posting a lot more smut in future pls make sure to leave a lot of love on this and reblog so that i know you guys enjoyed this as much i wrote and btw i included nsfw vid from twitter just so you can visualize it more precise hahaha enjoy

⇥ wish : can u pls reblog and gave ur thought 🥺 also, follow me for more 😆 btw guys i’m so overwhelmed with endless support you guys gave me and i thought if i reached 1k likes on this fic... i will do a series of jungkook smut fic😏

masterlist || ©softggujkk do not repost or modify.

It was insane yet intrigued Jungkook, even after countless times he had fucked you up till this time you were still able to stir up something beneath him. He doubted himself endured through time, only because both of you in public- or else he might pushed you against the desk and plunged his hars cock inside your pretty hole. There were always something about you made his heart and his cock acted like a horny teenage boys who craved for pleasure. Well, he was but it was more than pleased when it came to you, a feeling which he used to claim not able to feel but now he felt it with you. Love.

Jungkook never believed when they said sex hundreds of times much better when you did it with your lover. He always pictured sex purely just for giving sexual enjoyment, satisfaction. However when he met you everything had changed, Jungkook was not the old Jungkook, his life now completed when you were with him.

Both of them constantly aroused whenever his eyes landed on you, you were like a flame lit up his candle.

Jungkook perused at your curvy figure, your white silk blouse clad perfectly at the right angles, he didn't like the way the few buttons on your blouse left opened. Your juicy and round ass fitted tightly wrapped against your black pencil skirt, Jungkook bit his lower lips as he ran his fingers against his lips. Jungkook noticed how the other man inside the same room had been watching you all along you made entries inside the lounge room.

Despite the fact, he stared at you all along right after he noticed you, looked ethereal as ever. He still didn't fail to heed the lustful glances from all the males on you and he hated how clueless you can be sometimes for incapable to see their glances were more than a friendly glance. You didn't even notice when all their eyes landed none other than your perky boobs and that juicy ass that he claimed as him but still available for all the man to see it.

Jungkook knew it sound selfish but sometimes he wished you had no obligation to your work, he wanted to lock you inside his luxurious penthouse with the intention that none other than his eyes could see and enjoy you whilst you just waited for him back home from the work. You knew he was sitting a goldmine, he further than capable of giving you everything from head to toe, to please you inside out but your rejection of him spoiled you, exaggerated him.

He knew you loved your work as being the head manager of staff at the big hit but he couldn't help to be jealous and possessive when you wore such a tight attire, which made him imagined sinful things he wished to do on you.

Undeniably, he felt lucky and proud to have you as his girlfriend by his side but somehow he couldn't consider himself blessed when another man oggled your massive boobs and round ass. Well, consider themselves lucky to not have him punched their face to the death just by looking at you but he will not do so after you had warned the last time he got into trouble and hit a man who shamelessly looked at your ass.

Jungkook disliked made you angered with him, it didn't suit you, you suited better with a bright smile and cheeky grin of yours. Nevertheless, he knew you didn't want him to create any problem since he was an idol and he had to take care of his image and the company's image. Regardless, Jungkook couldn't restrain himself from worked up and enraged when the male stared at you, right in front of him just like right then but he tried his hardest to hold back his feelings and acted as if everything was alright.

Jungkook's eyes traveled every inch of your body, from head to toe, he can smell you even you were so far from him. That sweet scent of yours- even your pussy smelled intoxicated. Your scent made him sleepy yet his massive thing under his black leather pants awoke by how delicious you smelled.

You pushed off your hair from your shoulder, slightly scratched your collarbone and fucked it turned him on, even more, when he caught a glimpse of your fresh cleavage peeked from your blouse. His eyes landed on your shapely figure as you swing your right legs on your left legs, Jungkook wanted to glide his hands on your soft skin, needed to mark your smooth skin with his hickey, and spanked your butt hard until they red.

You were tempted him to take you there and fucked you senselessly in public, something about you aroused him, you didn't need to be naked in order to elicited him, you didn't need to seduce him to incited him yet just by seeing you smiled can make him very horny.

Eagerness built up within his veins, the urge to pull you inside his embrace and kiss you passionately remain as a fantasy. He can't do that in public. You hated PDA in front of other people and always remain so professional. Little did they knew, you were his pretty slut on his bed. Jungkook wondered if you ever thought of him while in the facade of your professionalism, he wondered if you had ever imagined and noticed his bulge over his pants.

Jungkook stared you straight in the eye but you pretend didn't see him at first until another staff whispered something probably about him and you turned to look at Jungkook before you glared at him, your cheeks flushed before you flashed a sweet grin at him and your fingers pointed at the camera.

Jungkook smiled back when you mouthed focus at him. How can he focused now when your lips looked so luscious just now, so pink, it looked so perfect on your stunning face.

Now he wanted your lips to wrapped around his cock-

"Isn't it right jungkook shi?"

Oh shit, Jungkook thought. He raked his veiny fingers against his long dark hair as he shook his head, damn he busted. All he ever thought about was you. He had a one-tracked mind and was too engrossed with staring at you until he forgot he were in the middle of doing Vlive to thank the army for the daesang they received with other members.

Luck for him when Jimin saved his ass as he patted Jungkook's thighs before laughing it off and told the army they were about to off and ended Vlive after they said their goodbyes and set off waved towards the camera.

You smiled as you stared at Jungkook, he looked so delighted with his members. Your eyes trailed down from his chiseled features down to his buff torso, he wore a black jacket paired up with tight leather pants. You sucked in a deep breath when your eyes noticed his prominent bulge aligned against his crotch. His cock was so big, thick, long, and just perfect to able rode your orgasm.

You nipped your lower lips as your eyes remember the last night you spent together with him, it had been one week since the last time he touched you. You were surprised by how you became addicted to sex and Jungkook. Ever since the day you met him your life change thirty-six degree, he was the first man and you wished was last who can make you begged on your knees just to had him fucked you.

Your eyes scanned his muscular and tough figure, you observed his muscles rippled beneath his tight leather pants as you gazed on his good looking face down to his slender and veiny hands, that long fingers roused you. Jungkook always had his way under your skin and knew exactly how to please you. The ways his fingers alone can make you cum and find your g-spot in a short period thrilled you. It was amazing how he had you twisted around his finger and how he managed to make you in the mood every time he wanted to fuck you.

The way he fucked you rough, senseless when he mad made your thighs clenched together. You could feel the fluids inside you streamed down, after one weeks days without him touched you and masturbated you wanted him to fuck you rough, hard, and raw. You felt craved and addicted to sex whenever it comes with him, your boyfriend. Jeon Jungkook. You never thought you will become one after you met him. You enjoyed sex as much as he did, you somehow wished he will ruin you.

You flinched when someone placed a hand on your shoulder, you turned and relief it was Taehyung. You disliked it when someone touched you but it was exceptional if they were bangtan or your boyfriend and your female friends. "Oh, I'm sorry for startling you," Taehyung bowed slightly as you shook your head.

You laughed off as you placed your palms on his chest, "No worries, Tae. Why? Do you need anything?” Taehyung nodded at your question and he looked down on his jacket, "It just I don't think I can fit the old measurement for tailored made clothes, it's too tight for me now," Taehyung scratched his nape, you eyes caught his shirt button almost flew opened.

Immediately, your fingers reached his shirt as you fix the button, the clothes cost a load of money. It will be such a waste if it tore up. You noticed the way Taehyung’s body and posture had enhanced a lot from slim to buff and sturdy. You heard about the nowadays had spent his times often at the gym, you used to know Jungkook was the only gym geek in bangtan. No doubt, Jungkook’s physique well built, muscular and fit.

He endless surprised you with his enormous stamina when he fucked you, he could able and ready for a fourth-round while you almost passed out. But, not lie you liked it.

"Okay, Tae. I can see that, I will talk to the stylish that arranged the clothes and asked her to measure your once body again. Don't worry,"

"Thank you, y/n. I need to go now since I could feel myself burning with a jealousy stare from your boyfriend," Taehyung wiggled his eyebrows and you knew what he talked about, indeed you can feel it too, Jungkook had his intense gaze on you, his veins fumed, his eyes never left your figure.

"You're welcome-"

"What did you guys talking about?"

Your conversation with Taehyung ended when Jungkook all of a sudden butt in and stood tall between you and Taehyung. His face written everything, he was jealous. You loved it when Jungkook tried to conceal his anger and jealousy in front of other people, you were the only one who knew how possessive and needy he became over you. Honestly, you didn't mind, that attitude of him assured you he loved you by his action instead of the word I love you he said to you every day.

Jungkook was contented when all the works had finished and he finally had time to spend with you but when he turned his face at where you sat, his expression turned unhappy when he saw you were talking to Taehyung, instead of approaching him your boyfriend and it annoyed him the hell out of him.

Jungkook poked his tongue against his inner cheeks as he stared closely at both of you. He didn't know what was so funny that you laughed like a high school girl to Taehyung and Jungkook infuriated, even more, when you placed your palms flat on Taehyung's chest. He needed to stop whatever you and him talked about.

Taehyung was about to answer Jungkook's question but interrupted by you, "It is nothing, don’t worry."

And in the exact moment, you had chosen death. Honestly, you wanted to push Jungkook slightly to see if he will punish you. Taehyung's eyes wide opened when you answered your boyfriend like that, Taehyung knew how Jungkook was, he can't tolerance disobedient and bratty attitude when it involved to you. Yet you here provoked him.

You were anxious, nervous, and uneasy by how Jungkook didn't bat his eyelash but remain cool and stared at you. You wanted him to be angry with you. Your eyes twitched when Jungkook's fingers reached a string of your hair and pushed it behind your ears, "Are you sure I should not worry, baby?" You gulped saliva when Jungkook whispered near your ears and licked your earlobe as his massive palms gripped your ass.

"Urm- I think I should go-" Taehyung trailed off as his eyes wandered everywhere to not look at both of you.

"Yeah, you should. I need to talk with y/n."

Jungkook cut off Taehyung's words before his arms circled your waist and pulled you by force against his chest. You heated up when your massive boobs met his hard chest and the fact that every staff watched both of your didn't help to calm down your embarrassment. Before you can even be processed, Jungkook had you wrapped under his control and made you followed him like a little puppy out from the lounge room.

“I’m fed up with your bratty attitude princess," Jungkook‘s voice was rough with barely suppressed fury, your stomach tinged with butterflies when he said that and gripped your side booty firmly.

"I don't understand what you are talking about, Jungkook.”

A knot of muscles at the side of Jungkook’s jaw pulsed before he pushed you against the wall and trapped you between his huge arms. His big brown eyes were dull and inexpressive, you gasped when he all of sudden placed his knee into the center of your crotch. Slowly rubbed his knee on your private part, you tried to close your legs but restrained with his other knee.

“You did it purposely aren’t you? Babygirl? Are you that thirsty for my cock plunged inside you, huh?”

His restrained, gentlemanly voice made your inside were in fluttered. His every word seemed to be calm and controlled, your heart thumped with fright, until you could hear the sound of your heartbeat pulsating. "It's driving me up the wall trying to hold myself from giving you the punishment yet you still begged for it." Jungkook continued, you let out a soft moan when his soft lips kissed the side of your face while his knee still rubbed your pussy.

Jungkook chuckled before his eyes turned on erotic, craved for you. You almost gave up on the floor but Jungkook reached you instantly before picking you up bridal style with no effort at all, your heart was palpitating and your palms sweated as you clenched his black jacket with your small palms.

Jungkook put you on the ground after he brought you in front of his studio, there was no one at the secluded area since the access of it only bangtan and several producers to work on with their album and songs. “Come.”

His low voice scared you yet excited you, wondered what he wanted to do with you. You never received your punishment outside from Jungkook’s penthouse. You averted your eyes when he turned to you, you had to keep calm at all costs.

A tingle of anticipation emerged inside your body, how would he punish you, will it be harder than before?

His massive dark-themed studio immersed sexual tension between both of you when Jungkook walked inside didn't bother to open the light and left his red led light open and the soft glow from the dim lamp kept his studio lit. You observed his studio, there was a huge and modern setup of recording, a piano, guitars, and a huge screen hanged on the wall. At the right, there was a red wine chaise longue and there was Jungkook had sat comfortably on them while staring at you.

“Do I need to repeat?” Jungkook low, hoarse voice sent gave you goosebumps. You shook your head as you stepped inside his studio, the slow thud from his door made you flinched. "Strip." He ordered.

You got cold feet by how Jungkook’s demure eyes stared at you like prey as you walked closer towards him left adequate distance between both of you. Your heart was in your mouth. You stunned by his sudden command, Jungkook propelled his hands into his leather pants pocket.

He crossed his right legs on his left. Jungkook tilted his head slightly, peered at you still stood tall in front of him. You waited in tense silence before you questioned him back, "W-What?" It was impossible to hide the slight quaver in your voice.

"You heard me princess,"

A thrill of excitement ran through you, your heart raced abrupt. You trembled with enthusiasm under Jungkook's dark gaze, stayed sat on the chaise longue and waited for you to strip.

In your agitation, you were unable to utter anything and fiddled your fingers in jitteriness over the band of your pencil skirt. Your cheeks were flushed with warmth, you felt so naked under Jungkook's dark gaze. The way his eyes observed your body like a prey didn't waver your heart from pounding, you didn't even dare to look up at him and continued to open your attire and left you bared only with a two-piece of your undergarments.

Jungkook thrilled and enraptured by your stunning figure, admired the ways your white lacey lingerie-clad on your body. They hugged your curves in the right way, it was a hurdle for him not to claim you but Jungkook was well pleased with how your body trembled and effected by his gaze. Your body responded to him so well, he perceived the faintest of flushes creeping up to your neck.

"It looks like you have been waiting for this, isn't it, princess?"

You gulped and sucked in a deep breath when his voice became a husky, erotic whisper. You hated how easy you were affected by him, you were dripping wet just by his lustrous gaze on your body. You never knew with Jungkook simply look at you without showing any sign to touch you can make yourself twice keen on for it.

You fidgeted on your feet, still waiting patiently for Jungkook to finally said something. "Open your bra and panties,"

You bite your lower lips, the soft glow from the lamp above Jungkook made him looked so hot and tasty just sitting right there and stared at you. He was like grey but hundred times much better, "Hurry up princess you don't want daddy to wait for you,"

Ah, that nickname he adored when you called him when he did you in the room, you stared at him and noticed his massive bulge under his leather pants. You could perceive the huge swell of his cock struggled to break free of its confines. You were so thirsty for him, you wanted to drink him. Your sex drive tempted when he looked so tempting, you unclipped your bra and let it fall as you bend to open your panties. Jungkook's eyes darkened, his eyes observed your body. His delighted to see your bare body as he lusted after you in all these days.

"Kneel."

Much to your irritation, you disliked how Jungkook ordered you one by one as if he wanted to edge your patience. You wanted him to fill you up in instant, the tension grew much intense. But being a good girl for him, you listened and kneel just right in front of him. Your heart burst with impatience, the distance between you and him escalated the tension and eagerness fiercer.

"Why don't you open your leg and show me your pretty cunt, babygirl?"

Your eyes sparkled with anticipation, you bit your lips and gradually expanded your tighs to Jungkook's view. You contented by how Jungkook observed you like his favorite dessert, you slipped your fingers on your private part, and pushed aside the lips of them, revealed your hole leaked with your wetness. The soft light made your wetness glistened under it.

Jungkook roused and hard admired his slutty princess, "Are you wet because of me or Taehyung hmm little slut?"

"Y-you,"

Jungkook smirked, reclined in the chaise longue, and wrapped his built arms against his chest, you waited for him to finally touched you but he didn't instead he stood up and walked towards you. The low sound of his black boots chills you, you sensed Jungkook fall in step behind you. You felt a thrill course from the back of your neck to the base of your spine and back up again.

You imagined his eyes roamed across the curve of your body, you saw his figure in your peripheral view and instantly looked up to him, the unguarded desire in his eyes was plain to see as they feasted on you. His gaze shot up to meet yours, his lust exposed, but instead of suppressing it, a slow, wicked smile spread over his lips and a question burned in his eyes.

Jungkook's fingers latched onto his belt, unfastened them, and pulled his tight leather pants until his mid-thighs. Your eyes feasted by his beautiful posture, you sucked in a deep breath when Jungkook turned and sat back on the lounge. You gulped your saliva by his massive cock on display, throbbed and hard, the tip of it swollen and glistened with his pre-cum.

"Come here, princess."

Your eyes averted from his cock up to his lustful eyes, you were about to stand up before he spoke up, "Did I said you able to stand?" The authority tone from him sent a shiver to your body, you back on you knee before crawling to him.

Jungkook wanted to ruin you so bad, fuck you till the day until you begged him to stop. Your juicy ass swayed and your perky boobs bounced at the each time you crawled towards him. Your hardened nipple perked up as if they wanted him to lick it, which he gladly would. He loved your boobs, the way they fitted his large palm so endearing. You listened to him so well that he didn't want to punish you but at the same time, he wanted to wreck you and had your pretty mouth moaned and screamed his name all night.

You looked so innocent yet so dirty when your beautiful eyes stared up to him. Jungkook pumped his shaft whilst his eyes drank your sexy figure. His left hand reached your flushed cheek and carresed them tenderly, he didn't realize how much he loved you at the point everything about you drove him crazy. Jungkook then glide his thumb that had his precum on it against your lips, "Lick." was all he said when he rested the tip of his finger on your bottom lip. Your tongue flicked out to do as he said, you twirled your tongue against his long and slender fingers and cleaned them.

Jungkook's cum tasted so much different than the old exes you had, his cum always tasted a hundred times much better than the other guy. Jungkook was always concerned about what he ate during the day and constantly took care of his health, that was probably why you found his cum far tastier and you won't mind if he asked you to swallow his cum.

"Such a good girl, arent you?"

Jungkook pulled his fingers out from your mouth, his index finger trailed down to your throat before his tattooed hands choked you firmly. "I asked you a question, slut."

"Y-yes, i am sorry."

"You made me so angered with you today, I don't know what I wanted you to do for me until I pleased and forgive your bratty attitude,"

"C-Can I suck you?"

"Whose cock you wanted more? mine or Taehyung? Do you know who you belong to?" Jungkook's tone made you shuddered and shifted uncomfortable on your knees.

"I belong to you and I want your cock,"

"Show me then, how much you wanted this cock."

Jungkook reached the back of your head before pushed your lips on his throbbed cock, your pussy tingled by his roughness. You loved this, you loved when he fucked you senseless and had you begged for his big dick inside of your pussy and mouth.

His gaze ignites something beneath you, naked, with eyes full of lust you reached his warm massive cock, ran your thumb over his balls. Jungkook closed his eyes with pleasure, groans escaped his lips. He sucked in his breath sharply when your hand curled firmly around him.

Excruciatingly slowly you flicked your tongue in and around the tip of his cock. Precum pooled, refilling each time your tongue swept around the head. You slowly stroked the rigid shaft of his cock while your tongue continued to tease him. You kept her eyes locked with his and took the head into your mouth. You felt his fingers sink into your hair as he started to thrust harder. You felt his dick hit the back of your throat but you didn’t mind. You will let him used you.

Pumping your hand as you took his cock deeper into your mouth, saliva trailing in rivulets from the corner of your mouth and left his cock slick. You watched his eyes closed and his breathing became ragged. You cupped his full balls in your hand and they tightened in her palm, giving away how close he was. The way he growled confirmed it. Jungkook live it up to see you on your knees and suck him good like a good girl you should be for him.

"No, not yet," Jungkook said as he shoved his hips faster against your mouth. Tears started to pull inside the pool of your eyes, your massive tits swayed forth and back, your hardened nipples grazed over Jungkook’s things sent you back to heaven.

Your mouth let out a ‘pop’ sound when Jungkook suddenly pushed your head out from him before he stood up and choked your neck as he turned your back against the chaise longue. You were still suffocated from earlier before Jungkook thrusted his dick inside of your mouth and fucked them as he pleased.

“Ahh, fuck your mouth so warm.” Jungkook groaned, tilted his head back while working on his rough, fast thrust against your mouth. You clenched your thighs together, your small palms hold his strong thighs. You gripped them firmly to stop him from thrusting but Jungkook ignored it as he continued to fuck your mouth. “I thought you want it, why you are so struggling? Make me cum little slut.”

Jungkook’s voice provoked your orgasm, you wanted to release. His voice alone enough to stir up your inside, you let go of his thighs and trailed down your fingers to your folds. You moaned against Jungkook sent a vibration through his big cock and made him shuddered. Jungkook loved when he was inside your mouth and your hole. Both of them never failed to fascinate him with your warmth and tight.

You moaned louder when Jungkook reached the back of your head as he pushed his hips forward and fucked himself inside your little mouth, you always shocked at how long Jungkook could last. Your jaw was already tired but you wanted to please him as much as you could. “Urgh, fuck!” Jungkook cursed as he shut his eyes and splurged out his cum inside your mouth before pulling it out from your lips, there was a dribble down your chin.

Jungkook wiped your lips with his thumbs, he thrilled and enraptured by your stunning figure, all messy and wrecked. “Baby, we are just started.”

And fuck that turned you more, you rubbed your fingers against your clit, needed the friction so much but halted when Jungkook nudged your arms, “I don't remember I allowed you to touch yourself? Aren’t you are so greedy, slut?”

“I-I’m sorry- Jungkook!”

You screamed his name when he pulled you from the floor and made you squatted down in front of him. “What a messy, baby-” Jungkook chuckled. His slender, veiny fingers rubbed the lips of your pussy. You were too impatient, you pushed up against his fingers, needing the rub and friction against you. “Patience.” The sound Jungkook slapped your perky boobs echoed through his studio.

You bit your lips as you shut your eyes tight, Jungkook circled your clit as his index fingers slipped inside your hole. It had been so long since you jad been touched there – since you had been touched anywhere – that it was electric, a shot through you core. “Ahh, Jungkook-“

“Princess, your wet cunt here looks so inviting," You gave a little whimper of struggle because of your position you were in, Jungkook grabbed your hair and pulled them, made your body arched forth as well pushed his three fingers inside you and straight hit your g-spot. “J—Jungkook!”

“Don’t fucking struggling . I warned you. You will sit here like a good slut you are and I will use your body like how I wanted.”

You bit your lips harder when Jungkook thrust his fingers inside of you faster and constantly hit your g-spot. You reached out his big cork, hard and throbbed, pumped him as he fingered you. You can’t hold your orgasm if he kept pushed you to the edge and before you could process your body spasmed violently, cum trailed down from your cunt. Even so, Jungkook didn't stop fingered you intensely. You reached his wrist to stop him but Jungkook didn't care as he continued his fingers on you. You knew what he intended; wanted to overstimulate you.

“J—Jungkook! I—I can’t!”

“Stop battling! You asked for it, now cum for me.”

Jungkook spoke with a gruff, masculine voice. You tried to simmer down but Jungkook’s fingers fucked you made you fall behind, he kept tabs on you, oh how he loved to see you wreck under his touch, how sensitive you were to him. Your back arched, you threw your head back with your hip rode his fingers.

You shuddered when you felt your inside started to build-up. Instead of cumming you unexpectedly squirted, “Oh yes baby,” Jungkook rode his fingers against you made you squirted, even more, you gasped under his touch. Your squirt splurged out from your pretty cunt, Jungkook stopped to finger you as he kissed your forehead. “Good girl.”

You trembled under his touch, your body almost gave up. Jungkook hold your arms as he carried you and lied you down on the couch, you shut your eyes closed, your breathe quickened. You forced your eyes opened when you felt something poked your entrance. “W-wait- j-jungkook!”

”Stay still, I’m still not done with you.” You were sweating bullets when he said that, Jungkook gripped your throat as he plunged his hard shaft full inside of you. Your voice stucked, your mouth agape due to the sensation. You were still numb and sensitive after you reached the peak of your second climax. However, Jungkook seemed uncared as he forced you to stand and slammed your upper body against his record desk.

“Jungkook!” You whimpered against the desk when he without any notice had plunged his big, hard cock inside you. You were too swamped with his hard thrust, your lips nonstop moaned louder and screamed his name every second his hip slapped your ass. As expected, Jungkook always his way inside your body, he knew the place that drive you crazy. “J-Jungkook! I-I’m cumming!”

“Don’t.” Jungkook gripped a fist of your hair, arched your back against his front torso. “Don’t fucking dare.” He warned against your ears, his hips still worked on in full speed pushed his massive shaft inside of yours. He was indeed so rough, wild that you started to see stars. You tried to reach his cheeks to kiss him but Jungkook dodged your palms, “I don’t think you deserved a kiss, slut.”

You were dumbfounded at first, Jungkook knew how kiss meant to you in bed. You loved it when he kissed you while his cock jabbed inside of you like a heated animal. “J-Jungkook, I don't think I-” You moaned so loud, it was crystal clear that you bet people who might walked outside of his studio might can hear you but you didn't care. You were never embrassed to tell the world that your man pleased you so well, so good that you cant contain your moan and your hormones around him.

“Fuck, pretty slut. This tight pussy take me so well, huh.” Jungkook reached over your clit with his right hands as his left hand gripped your waist to steady your posture against his desk. Your back arched even more when Jungkook played with your clit while his cock thrusted in and out of yours, he circled your clit as his lips sucked in your neck.

You were amazed by the way he last, sex with the Jeon Jungkook was on top of heaven itself. He will indeed satisfy you first before him even after your climax he still wasn't cum. However, you could tell by the way his arms trembled with pleasure against your waist proved he was about to reach. You were that desperate to cum for the third time, you purposely clenched your thighs together to edge him and it worked.

“Oh fuck fuck, baby i’m near- oh shit!”

You reached the back of his neck when he snuggled his face against your exposed neck, left his love marks everywhere. You rolled your eyes back when Jungkook thrust even harder and faster, “J-Jungkook!”

“Take it slut, take this big cock like a good girl.”

His dirty talk even edges you more, before you could even process your body spasmed and so did Jungkook. He groaned as shot his warm loaded cum inside of you. You fell over the desk as you propelled your body with your elbow, Jungkook rasped as he cockwarmed himself.

“Damn, little slut. You’re wrecked.”

Jungkook chuckled as he pulled out his now softened cock from your wet ass pussy. He was content to see his cum mixed with yours as it flooded out from your hole, he inserted his fingers inside of yours again to push the cum inside of your pussy. You moaned when you felt his long fingers inside of you once again.

“As I thought, so responsive.” Jungkook smiled, despite the fact you were tired after the third round, your hole still reacted to his touch. Jungkook slowly reached your body and twirled you to face him, you clung onto his muscular body. You were out of your breath, your eyes fluttered open to look at Jungkook. His lips formed a small, fond smile as he stared at you.

“Am I hurting you?” He asked, his large palm caressed your cheeks as his thumb brushed under your eyes. You shook your head, snuggled your cheeks against his palm. You closed your eyes to feel his warmth that started to develop to you. “I love you.”

His low confession sent tingles through your skin, you were about to reply but stunted when he placed his lips on top of yours, planted a soft kiss. You fluttered your eyes open before your lips formed a wide grin and you planted a passionate kiss on his lips. I love you too, jungkook.

masterlist

▎ all rights reserved © nsfwjjk → 

reposting, modifying or translating is not allowed. appropriate legal action will be taken if any of my works are plagiarized in any way, shape or form. 

+ contains sexuality, strong language, mature themes, nsfw, smut

⇒ softcore | smut, fluff | idol au

you want to push him so that he fucked you rough until you squirted.

⇒ alphas | smut, fluff, angst

— 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐧

⇒ therapeutic spa | smut 

+ one — you got a full body massage from a hot masseur

+ two ft jungkook — you got a special fee after the last time

⇒ manhandled you | smut

+ he wanted to manhandle you from behind fuck you hard as he shove his fingers deep in your mouth, making you whimpers as you drool all over his fingers.

⇒ let me teach you | smut, fluff

+ you and yoongi has been in a relationship for two years but you are still a virgin because of how innocent you are, however, yoongi always having a hard time when you wear cute sexy outfits just for him plus whenever you wear his shirt.

𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐧

𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐧

⇒ take it | smut, angst

+ you humiliated your boyfriend in front of his friends and told him your ex can fuck you better— when the truth was you boyfriend always fucked you good and hard.

boyfriend-jungkook things.

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader genre: fluff rating: g word count: - tags/warnings: a list compiled of all the fluffy things i’ve made up about jk and forced upon my bestie while she was out here visiting me (and more…)

a/n: for @btsroyalwilds​, thanks for spending the last three weeks with me. i’m going to pretend i’m not sad about you leaving. can’t wait ‘til we can sing our lungs out at a bts concert together one day~

- he would have a folder on his phone named, ‘pics my baby took,’ & they would be candid pics you’ve taken of jungkook when he was either sleeping or not paying attention that you sent to him later

- make a highlights reel on ig just for you and it would have a ♥︎ for its title

- he would pull you by the strings of your hoodie to bring you to him just so he can kiss you or hug you (giggling while he was doing it)

Keep reading

<<<<3333

I Want You to Stay (08) | JJK

Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader

Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut

Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, attempted assault; use of the term slut in a derogatory way, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; eventual explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)

Chapter Word count: 17.4k

Series Masterlist

Status: Ongoing

Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You’ve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.

Playlist 🎶: on the way home

A/N: Hiii thank you again for all your love and appreciation for this story. Srsly, I'm perpetually blown away 🥰 But like I've mentioned, updates will take longer after this as I return to uni, so I hope for your patience as we get closer to the end.

This chapter also contains triggering topics such as sexual harassment and attempted assault. There's a discussion on what happens after something traumatizing like that, so pls be cautious and know that what's depicted here is just another way of dealing with such experience.

On another note, I hope you enjoy this!

And as always, my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight  🥰

PS. If I can’t tag you, pls fix your settings!

The end-of-autumn chilly air pierces through your skin, lingering even as you settle inside the plant store that gives the warmth that you need. You sigh in relief, and Soomin and Jimin giggle at you because they know how you are. It’s why during moments like this, their affection shows, hugging you from each side as you look up at the shelf for another rubber tree you want to add to your collection.

“What are you two on about?” You ask, nonchalantly releasing your arm to get your chosen glossy plant. 

“Nothing, just showing our love,” Soomin says, resting her chin on your shoulder. “We know you love the cold even if you easily get cold. You don’t like hugs either but you can’t do anything about us.”

“It’s true that I can’t do anything about the both of you,” you hum. “But you also know it’s not that I don’t like hugs. It’s just not my preferred form of affection.”

“Even after all the years that we’ve been giving it to you?” Jimin asks, as he pulls away from you to place the plant in your cart.

“Yeah. I mean, if I only give or receive it every few weeks, then it wouldn’t be,” you respond. “But I also wouldn’t really know. Other than you guys, there’s not much affection I feel towards other people.”

It’s a reality you’ve long accepted. You’re away from your family and friends, and the only other form of affection you receive is through sex with the few men you’ve been interested in - pleasurable at best, shallow at worst. Perhaps it’s the reason why you do, you think now. They’re still good substitutes. Being alone doesn’t feel so lonely when you’re intimate with people you don’t exactly share moments of intimacy with. You’ve learned these last few years that there’s a difference. 

Your friends just hum in agreement, choosing now to point out that your home is transforming into some zen garden with the amount of plants you’ve bought just this last month. 

“Should I just be a gardener or a plant store worker?” You look at them. “Or study to become a landscape designer?”

“Honey, tending to low-maintenance plants is a different thing,” Soomin chuckles. “That’s a start, though. But kidding aside, so a career change is what you’re going for?”

“Hmm, just a thought,” you shrug. “What if moving companies isn’t just what I need? What if it’s doing something completely different? Like being out of an office or answering to someone or something?”

“That’s true. Sometimes we find what we’re looking for in unfamiliar environments,” Jimin chimes in. “Are you thinking about doing it soon?”

“Maybe not,” you say. “I’ve become quite invested in the Arts Center and I really wanna see it through. Maybe after it’s opened, then that’s when I’ll finally step away.”

“Well, you have been doing a lot of work for it,” Soomin agrees. “But… are you sure it’s the only thing holding you back? And not someone specific? A boss, maybe?”

“The Arts Center isn’t holding me back, Soo. And neither is Jungkook,” you state. “After all the years I spent in the company, I don’t wanna let anything or anyone keep me from doing what’s best for me. I don’t… I don’t wanna get stuck there. I don’t wanna keep feeling indebted. That’s what’s held me back this whole time.”

“Oh, hun,” Soomin sighs. “You don’t owe anyone anything. And if you did, you’ve paid your dues, all eight years of them.”

As Jimin heads out to get his car, she entangles her arm around yours and asks again if your decision to wait to resign has something to do with Jungkook.

“Why are you so insistent?” You frown at her. 

“Just… wondering. You haven’t expressed disdain for him in so long. Even the weekly ugh work drives me nuts messages have stopped, and that says a lot. I was just thinking that maybe he’s gone soft on you, and that you’ve gone soft on him, too. I just wanna make sure I’m ready when you drop the bomb on us or something. I mean, you two have so much tension, who knows what’ll happen?”

“Okay, what if I’ve just developed better coping mechanisms now and can manage without complaining about it? That’s a possibility. And, even if I’ve been busy with organizing events and stuff, I actually enjoy that,” you explain. 

“Okay. So what about Jungkook?”

You look away, knowing that any acknowledgment of the comfort you’ve started to feel around him may start to mean something else once you say it. Admitting even the tiniest bit of attraction is even more of a no-no, so you just play it off, the same way you did when you got home from the gala and you dodged all questions about him, choosing instead to talk about the delicious food and the weird people you met. 

“We’ve found a way to move on from how we started and learned that we actually work really well together. We have to be professional and all that.”

Right, you scoff to yourself. Thinking about your boss’ smile as you fall asleep is anything but professional.

“Fine, whatever you say,” she gives in as the car comes into view. “Just know that I’m here, okay? Jimin’s a bit protective and still hasn’t gotten over how that man treated you so you can talk to me in case anything else changes.” 

“I will,” you say, giving her hand a squeeze. 

You spend the rest of that weekend watching movies and singing your hearts out at a karaoke and stuffing your faces with good food. Before you know it, you’re back in your bed on a Sunday, all alone, but you don’t feel so lonely, nor do you feel so terrible at having to start another week. If anything, you’re wondering how Jungkook spent these last two days. At a club, maybe. He did say there’s always a party he’s invited to. 

You stop yourself from thinking of what happens after that. He’s got women at his beck and call after all, even when he’s in Singapore, as Lucas had told you during your call two months ago. But it doesn’t really matter - Jungkook is Jungkook and you’re you. And that’s not yet even considering the glaring reality of him being your boss. 

Ever since the gala, you can say that there’s been a change in how you’ve been with him. There’s a lot more attention, you’d say. There’s more admiration, too, when it comes to him doing his work, making decisions, and drawing up plans and designs. 

You understand the distance and the detachment somehow. You suppose that whatever he experienced made him that way, so you’d make an effort into making him smile, teasing him a little more than usual so there’s a bit more joy in his day. You can say he’s gotten used to it. Even Mr. Ri would laugh and join in. 

And that’s the thing - you anticipate it. You look forward to the curl of his lips and the dip on his lower cheek and the softness in his eyes and the way he turns away or bows his head to hide it. Even the way he’d play it off is quite endearing, a term you never thought you’d use to describe him. It makes you wonder if people had tried to get to know him, maybe knock on the door and wait around to see if he’d come out and let them in. 

But all that has brought you to right now - Sunday night as you think about seeing him the next morning. You think back to all the times that you’d entered his penthouse and saw him in his gym attire post-workout, the seconds you’d spent so close to him as you adjusted his necktie, and the breakfasts and car rides you’d shared. You recall the nods of acknowledgement after serving him his coffee, the times he’d agreed with your recommendations, and the instances he’d turned to you for support and his look of thanks after you’ve given it. 

Then there’s the grazing of your fingertips, the brushing of arms, the interlocking of eyes.

And your heart, beating a little too fast then.

You groan to yourself. You really have to find a way for this to stop.

You try to keep your distance from Jungkook for the next few days. 

You do your usual - fix his outfit, eat with him the breakfast you prepared, go through schedules, and join him in meetings. You do away with the eye contact, you skip the teasing, and you don’t share about your evening like you’ve been doing. And that’s only because doing so just gives you moments to remember, like his gazes lingering or the sound of his laughter. Even more, it messes with your mind thinking that just like you, he spends most of his weeknights alone. 

You act unbothered, although him catching you looking at him from your office seat and then you, quickly looking away doesn’t really help your case. 

It’s on Wednesday when he passes by your desk to put back some files and you return to your task after giving him a small smile when he asks if you’re okay.

“Yes, Mr. Jeon. Just a little tired but aren’t we all?” You respond, your eyes flitting from him to your desktop screen. 

“Yes, but most of us take breaks. You don’t,” he counters.

“Neither do you,” you turn to him with an arched brow. 

It’s become a habit of yours to remind him to rest but just like you, he’s pretty stubborn. 

“Ah, there you are,” he chuckles. “I was almost convinced you’re not really my assistant if you didn’t point that out but alas, it’s you.”

“Are you testing me, sir?” You frown at him. 

A mistake, really, since he gives you that teasing smirk of his that you’re learning is your weakness. 

“Maybe,” he shrugs. “You just haven’t seemed like yourself all week and I just wanted to make sure that you’re okay. You can take a leave tomorrow, if that’s what you need.”

“It’s okay, sir. And I’m fine,” you assure him, realizing that there’s not much that could keep you away from him. “Plus, we have that dinner with the media festival organizers tomorrow evening and it’s the only time they’re free.”

“I know,” he sighs. “As long as you’re sure. It’s selfish but I do need you there.”

Of course he does, you think to yourself. You’re there to make his life easier, after all. It’s the only reason why he’d ever need you or want you around. 

You confirm that you’ll go to work tomorrow and sigh in relief when he doesn’t say anything more. You decide to go home, wanting to get to the weekend so you can find some distraction, in whatever way that may be. 

Thursday comes and you spend your day divided between working with the support team for the upcoming VP events and coordinating with the Arts Center marketing team for the deliverables they need signed off. 

It’s busy enough that you don’t see much of Jungkook but that only really lasts until you have to accompany him to that welcome dinner with the organizers of the international media festival that Jungkook wanted to collaborate with for the Arts Center promotions. It’s happening in August of next year and while the partnership has been established,  he wants to work on his relationship with them so that the plans could firm up quickly. 

You head to Jungkook’s restaurant of choice in Itaewon, a fancy place that serves Korean dishes in a modern, artistic way. You’ve heard about it before; the food looks like something you could put at an art gallery. Korea’s exceptional ability to merge traditional and modern elements is reflected in this restaurant’s menu. It’s why he wanted to bring them here, he tells you. 

You settle in your seat, excited for the dishes that are about to come out, and that’s when you see him, the man you dated before Hajoon, and someone you haven’t heard from in a while. Of course, that wasn’t always the case. He continued to reach out months after you ended things with him. It seemed harmless then, and it was only two years ago when he finally stopped. 

Chi-won recognizes you first, having come in to serve the first set of dishes. He stares as he sets the plate in front of you, his gaze lingering even as he moves on to one of the organizers to your right. He looks different, which is why it took you another look for his face to register. He’s lost weight and cut his hair; his features look somehow harder, too. 

There’s an intensity in his eyes that you’ve never seen before. He was pretty laid-back, a reason why you both clicked that first time. He’d have his moments of frustration, letting them out in his own ways like in the bedroom, but he always seemed to get over them quickly.

Things were always casual and you made sure he knew that. He didn’t seem to mind at first but he started to want more and with your new role with Hoseok then, you were always tired and busy. The nights with Chi-won stopped being your relief, and when you told him you couldn’t see him anymore, he seemed to accept it. The messages shortly after were just about asking how you were doing and after answering twice, you stopped replying and then changed your number. You haven’t heard from him since, and you assumed he’d just accepted things and moved on.

But tonight you feel the tension, and so when he stands close to you when he serves the succeeding plates and when he waits around your table to watch you eat, you start to feel uncomfortable. 

You try to be present in the conversation happening around you, as the organizers seem to be enjoying the meal while also pitching in some ideas for the launch. You try to focus on Jungkook’s voice this time to distract you. But the pair of eyes that seems to watch your every move starts to become too much, and the anxiety builds as each second ticks by.

It’s while you wait for the dessert when you take the opportunity to step out. Jungkook mentions the invitation drafts so you say that they’re saved in your iPad that you’ll retrieve from the car parked on the other street. He agrees that it would be good to show them, so you excuse yourself and get some much needed fresh air, feeling like a weight has been lifted off your shoulder just by not being in the same space as Chi-won. 

That is, until you hear a familiar voice call your name. 

You stiffen for only a moment then continue to walk, fumbling for your phone as you try to dial Mr. Ri’s number. But you don’t get to, as the man following you pulls your wrist to get you to face him. You jerk in response, dropping your phone on the ground, and the fear fills you immediately.

“Don’t touch me,” you seeth, cradling your arm as you pick up your phone. 

You try to stay calm, even as his smug face gives you chills, and you try to remember the man who liked to laugh and joke around those years ago, seeing now that he’s nothing like him.

“Funny you say that when that’s all you wanted me to do before,” he mocks, inching closer to you. “I know you remember, ___. Those nights were amazing, weren’t they? Your body and your moans told me so, so I don’t know why you wanted them to stop.”

You want to stay silent and not give him anything, but there’s desperation in his eyes, and you’re afraid of what he’ll do if you don’t even acknowledge him, so you give the same explanation you did before.

“I told you. I didn’t want anything serious,” you say, making sure you keep your distance from him. 

“That’s not what you’d say whenever you’re drunk,” he counters. “You’d go on about not wanting to be alone, about wanting to be taken care of and being with someone who made you feel loved.”

“I never said I wanted it to be you,” you respond, too quickly for his liking it seems, as you see his look turn into anger. 

“So what was I for?” He demands. “Just the guy you fucked for the sake of it?”

“I was stressed with work and you hated yours,” you remind him. “That’s all we needed each other for.”

“But things changed for me,” he says, his voice softening again, the fluctuation of his tone scaring you even more. “I wanted to be with you. And seeing you now, I know I still do.”

“But I don’t,” you state. “I didn’t then and I don’t even now.”

“But you wanted that restaurant owner, didn’t you?” He demands, worrying you that he knows about Hajoon. 

“No, that didn’t mean anything. We were never together.”

“Bullshit, ___. I’d see you at the clubs around here with his arm on your waist, just like I used to do. That clearly meant something.”

The thought that Chi-won kept tabs on you even after you ended things makes you angry. Perhaps it’s because he works around the area you frequented during those times but even then, the fact that he even knows what Hajoon does for a living is crossing the line, and in your frustration, you hit Chi-won where it hurts the most.

“Clearly it didn’t mean enough because I’m not seeing him anymore. And I was never serious with him, just like I wasn’t with you.”

He visibly groans. He walks closer to you again, prompting you to walk backwards. With you turned back and walking on your heels on the uneven pavement, you’re worried you’ll hurt yourself. Even more, a part of you is scared that he’ll hurt you. It’s still early on a Thursday night and you’re in the quieter part of town so there aren’t many people walking on the streets; those who are are too far for you to catch their attention. So you continue your steps until you’re backed up against the wall and with nowhere to go, you start to panic, feeling the fear slowly overtake you. 

“You know, I came out here because I wanted to talk to you just to see how you were doing since you know, I actually cared about you like you wanted,” he rolls his eyes. “But seeing you act like none of what we shared mattered just makes me so angry. Why do you get to go on and treat me like shit? I’m just gonna have to do the same, then.”

At this, he cages you, his face too close to yours that you freeze in fear. The smirk makes you nauseous, but somehow you find the strength to push him away but he comes back right after, closer each time.

“I said, don’t touch me!” You yell, giving him another shove. “Just stay away from me!”

Chi-won grabs your wrist once more, holding you tightly so he can show you that he has control and that he can do whatever he wants.

“Let me go!” You plead, but he doesn’t budge. 

“I don’t want to, not when I get to have you all alone after so long,” he hums, licking his lips and dragging his eyes all over your body. “I always liked it when you came over wearing that skirt of yours.”

You know this is what he wants. He wants you to be scared, he wants to haunt your dreams and not make you forget him because he knows that you obviously already had. You’re terrified but you try to gather whatever courage you have within you to fight back.

But it’s then that you hear footsteps, and a shadow appears behind Chi-won.

“She said to let her go.”

Jungkook’s voice is hard, tense, angry. But there’s control, and you can tell that he’s trying to hold himself back. He comes into view, the mix of worry and anger on his face helping to relieve your fear. 

But it doesn’t affect Chi-won, as he continues to hold onto your wrist. Your strained face lets Jungkook know that you’re still in the man’s hold, prompting him to walk closer and repeat his words.

“I said to let her go,” he demands. “Do it. Because we both know there are so many things I can do to you and smashing your face is just one of them.”

Jungkook rolls up his sleeves and clenches his fists. He doesn’t think it’s enough to scare the man who’s holding you hostage but he thinks it’s enough to show that he’s indeed willing to throw a punch if he has to. He’d pull the man away but he doesn’t want you to get hurt. He’d beat the daylights out of this asshole but he doesn’t want you to witness that. You’re terrified already as it is; anything more might just break you further. 

So Jungkook keeps his gaze on the man, hoping the threat would work somehow.

It does, as the man lets you go then raises his arms mockingly, as if to surrender. You step away immediately, finding your way towards Jungkook. Chi-won looks at the man next to you from head-to-toe, his attempt at intimidation. 

“The boss, I assume?” Chi-won scoffs. “That’s cheap, even for you.”

“Don’t fucking talk to her like that,” Jungkook fumes, trying his hardest to keep himself together and not make this worse. 

“Women who are that lonely and that desperate for sex would do anything and use anyone to get what they want and feel better about themselves,” Chi-won shrugs. “I’m just saying I’m not surprised.”

The insult is unfounded. You know at this point, he’s just trying to say anything to provoke Jungkook and put you down in the process. Somehow you’ve learned how to deal with men like this.

“Yeah, I was so desperate that I ended up settling for a low-life like you,” you scoff, hoping the brave facade holds up. “You weren’t even that good. I could only fake it for so long.”

And this is what does it for him, as Chi-won’s face distorts in anger, and while you know your words provoked him, you wanted to show that you could regain your control, and he’s the one who now breaks because of it.

“Fucking slut,” he yells, charging towards you.

But Jungkook charges back, pushing Chi-won towards the wall and making sure he stays there. The anger on Jungkook’s face is unlike anything you’ve ever seen before, yet despite this side of him that you’re now witnessing, you can’t help but feel emotional at his presence. If it wasn’t for him, you don’t know what would’ve happened; you don’t know where you’d pull the strength to stand up for yourself.

“You say anything else and I swear, getting fired is gonna be the least of your worries,” Jungkook huffs. “Because this boss knows your manager. This boss knows the police chief at the station not far away. You hurt her and you’re gonna pay for this. I’m gonna make sure of it.”

Chi-won slowly realizes that those aren’t empty words, as he visibly starts to look worried. There’s not much he can do now. You doubt he can overpower Jungkook despite his size. You also know Chi-won doesn’t have much, and losing his job could make him lose everything. And that scares you, too.

“Jungkook, it’s okay. Just let him go,” you plead, tugging his arm to pull him away. You know how much worse it could get if anything else happens. You know that Jungkook is very much capable of inflicting physical pain, and you don’t want blood on his hands because of you. “Let’s just go back inside.”

Jungkook looks at you, the fear clearly still evident - your eyes are glassy and empty, your hand on his arm is shaking, and your voice is cracking. Whatever courage you had at answering back earlier is slowly dissipating, and all Jungkook wants is to get you away from all this. 

“I’m fine, Jungkook. He’s just angry and I don’t blame him,” you insist. 

All lies, really. You wish the worst for Chi-won, but you know it won’t do you nor Jungkook any good if you both go down this path. 

Your eyes plead for him to take your lead this time and he sees it, he sees you, and you see his tiniest of nods before turning to Chi-won.

“Get out of here and call it a night before I do anything else to you.”

Chi-won, who’s clearly still furious, starts walking away. But in his effort to regain the control you took from him, he turns to you before heading back inside. 

“You’re really fucking good at that, you know?” He says to you. “Fuck the man you know wants you and then just drop him when you get bored or when you find the next guy who can pleasure you without the commitment you obviously desperately want. You’ll always be miserable whatever you do.”

You will the tears not to fall as the words hit you where it hurts. They’re things you’ve heard not long ago, just in a different variation, and by another man who had the same fate as Chi-won - left by you because you couldn’t give them what they wanted. Maybe you’re too honest when you’re drunk, maybe that’s when the yearning for something meaningful and more permanent comes out, and maybe that’s when they thought they could be what you wanted. 

But you’ve always known from the beginning that they couldn’t give you what you desired, and you always hoped you’d cut the cord before they started to want more. Turns out your timing is just as bad as your judgment. 

You let them have the final say, though. And then you let them walk away. You feel like it’s climactic for them, liberating even, to be able to tell the person who hurt them that she’s selfish and she doesn’t deserve happiness. You suppose it just proves that they didn’t really feel much; perhaps your read on people isn’t that terrible after all. 

You manage to rein all the emotions in and look at Jungkook who remains standing next to you. His fist is still clenched and you see the anger in his eyes. You’ve never seen him like this, not even when Hajoon threatened him. This is the first time you thought he could really hurt someone, and he would’ve done it on your defense. 

“We should go back to dinner,” you finally say. “They’re probably wondering where we are.”

Jungkook turns to you, the fear still evident in your eyes but he can see you trying, he can see you try to be brave and bury all that pain in for his sake. 

“I’m not letting you go back in there,” he responds, his tone hard and firm. “I’m not letting you anywhere near that man again.”

You don’t insist this time. You don’t want to be anywhere near Chi-won, either. So you just nod and wait for Mr. Ri to arrive after he was called to come to you with the car. Jungkook is about to instruct the older man to go inside and send his apologies to the organizers but you tell Jungkook it should be him. You manage to convince him to properly send them off and pay the bill and while initially unwilling, he finally goes, giving Mr. Ri strict orders not to leave you alone.

Mr. Ri breaks at the pained look on your face - an uncommon sight for him, and one that hurts him. It’s not the first time though,  and that just makes it worse. 

“Stay strong, okay?” He says, despite not knowing what happened. “You have people around to protect you, to keep you safe. You know that.”

You nod in acknowledgement, as you’re unable to get any word out. But you see the pain in his eyes, too, and for all the years that you’ve known him, the comfort in them always comes. 

Jungkook returns and informs you that the organizers will be leaving soon. He asks you if it’s okay if he drives you home and you say that it is. Even if he’s just seen you be humiliated, somehow it’s him you want to be with you as you try to process what happened. You know it’ll ease his mind as well, and you don’t want him to worry any more than he already is. 

You both say goodbye to Mr. Ri and then enter the car, with you feeling a little odd to be sitting in the passenger seat with Jungkook next to you. But you settle in, your body moving on its own; it feels quite foreign to you, with your mind in a haze and your nails engraving their marks on your palms, as if by some miracle it could erase what happened tonight from your memory. 

But you doubt anything would.

“His shift ends soon and I don’t want to take you home right away, just in case he follows,” Jungkook says. 

You look at him questioningly and he immediately knows what you’re thinking. 

“I know the manager and I asked him,” he explains as he starts driving away. “But don’t worry, I didn’t say anything. And that bastard didn’t see me. He avoided me and stayed in the kitchen the whole time I was there, as if he wasn’t serving our table the whole evening. I should’ve picked up that he was trying to get near you. I… I’m sorry I didn’t get to you in time.”

You still came for me, you want to say. It’s the thought that keeps swimming in your mind. You don’t know how long you were gone for but he could’ve called; he chose to go out and look for you instead. 

It’s as if he knows what you’re thinking, as he says that he noticed you were away longer than he expected. 

“It just felt odd. You would’ve messaged me if something was up,” he reasons. “I guess I noticed earlier that he kept coming to our table for no reason but I didn’t pay it any mind. But then another server brought the dessert. I asked where he was and the guy said he went outside without any explanation, and I just had a weird feeling. I should’ve come sooner, ___.”

You want to say that he doesn’t have to apologize, that things could’ve been worse if he hadn’t come, that you owe him your life that he did but you’re feeling too much to even manage a word out. 

At the stoplight, he turns to you and sees the half-moons embedded on your skin. He sees the glassy eyes and the trembling lips. He wants nothing more than to shield you from all this, to take you somewhere where you’re safe and where no one can hurt you. He didn’t think that seeing you like this would make him feel so powerless, because much as he can make that man’s life miserable if you let him, what he can’t do is take your pain away. What he doesn’t know how to do is comfort you.

“I’ll drive you around first, is that okay?” 

You nod, turning to your right to watch the city pass you by. It’s a breeze driving down the bridge as lights illuminate the Han River. The moon’s reflected on it, too, but you don’t feel any joy nor calmness. All you feel is this heavy burden of disgust and fear and shame and loneliness and anger. 

You quickly wipe the tear that falls, hoping that Jungkook doesn’t see. Your eyes remain glued outside, and you watch the buildings slowly disappear, replaced by little cafes and stores closing shop. It’s a familiar street, one you’ve passed by on some mornings, and you appreciate the familiarity. 

The car stops but you don’t look away from the window, afraid that seeing the worry on Jungkook’s face will make you break down. 

“We’re at a neighborhood park near your place,” he says. “I’ll just be outside, just in case you need time alone. You can put the radio on blast. You can honk if you need me, or you can come out if you want to. I’m just here.”

He doesn’t wait for you to respond. He just exits the car and walks towards the bench that overlooks the playground. You put the music on loudly, and perhaps just as he expected you to do, you cry. And you cry hard. 

You shut your eyes from the pain. It forces you to relive that moment but you do your best to crumple it like paper and then burn it from your memory. You know the burned pieces and the smoke will stay - an alley will trigger you, the scent of cooking oil and cheap cologne will make you gag. It’s how it is with painful memories - they burn you but there’s not much you can do to put out the fire. And when it’s gone, it’s not over. The scars remind you it happened. And then they urge you to make sure it doesn’t happen again. 

You don’t know how long it takes for you to cry out all the tears. It feels like they won’t end - they’re the words you couldn’t say earlier, and the words that would haunt you for longer. But they eventually stop falling, and you’re exhausted by the time they do. You have new crescents on your palms, too, and those may go away but you know they’re the only things that will. Everything else will be invisible, and that makes it a harder burden to carry.

Outside, Jungkook glances at the car to make sure you’re still there. He doesn’t think there’s any danger now; he doubts that man got to follow you here, too. But with what happened earlier, there’s this perpetual worry about anything that harms you, and he doesn’t want for there to be even a single second where you’re afraid, where you’re looking over your shoulder in fear, and where you think you’re everything that man said you are. 

He can try to keep you safe. He can try to lift you up. But when it’s about trying to forget, trying to move on, he knows there’s not much he can do. He knows a bit about painful experiences and memories that won't leave him. He’s done his best to hide those away, kept in the deepest nooks of his being that’s caused him to conceal parts of himself as well. It’s not easy to do but he does it; all these years later, he doesn’t know how not to.

But then there’s you and somehow, those parts of him that he’s kept hidden come out. Maybe it’s those pieces that will help comfort you, that will help protect you, that will help keep you safe. He’s not sure but if they are, maybe it’s not such a bad thing for them to resurface, if it means you won’t be scared or hurt or alone. 

His gaze flits back to the playground. He glances at your direction every few minutes. He wants to respect your privacy, at least as much as what his car and the radio on blast could give. He hopes that all the crying could help ease your pain somehow. He also hopes he’s one person who could. 

Jungkook hears the door open and he turns to see you slowly get out. He remains in his seat and waits to see where you go. A minute later, you’re sitting on the bench next to him, your breathing slowed down now, and your hands are less shaky than earlier. Your eyes are still glassy, and he wishes he could wipe the tears away should they fall, but he knows it’s not something he can do.

Both of you sit in silence as you watch the moon dance over the field of grass. It’s peaceful here at this time of the night. It’s not a place you expected him to take you but you’re glad that he did. 

You didn’t grow up going to parks because your mother rarely had time to take you; no one could accompany you either. When you moved to Busan during your pre-teen years, you felt you’d outgrown it even if Jimin and Soomin would invite you. There were always so many kids around and you didn’t know how to talk to them or to play with them so you always stayed in your own spot, near the tree where you could watch them run about. 

“I didn’t know where to take you but, uh, I loved playing in the playground when I was a kid,” Jungkook bursts through your thoughts. “It somehow always made me feel safe.”

“Did you like going to parks, too?” You ask, finally finding your voice, visibly surprising him.

“Not really. I wasn’t exactly fond of people even as a child,” he softly chuckles, earning him a small smile. “And well, my older brother liked to tease me in front of his friends when we’d play so I would ask to go late in the afternoon once the kids have left. My father picked up on it so he built a playground just for me in our backyard. It was really nice. I’d spend all day there when I was younger.”

A little Jungkook coming down the slide, climbing up the rock wall, and playing in the seesaw looks so wholesome. You wonder if he squealed while on the swing like kids usually do. Maybe. It’s nice to imagine a version of him that’s joyful and free. You wonder when the last time he felt that way was.

You also wonder what has made him share something that feels so personal to him with you. You’re thinking maybe it’s to make you feel comfortable or to ease your nerves; maybe it’s to tell you that unlike Chi-won, he’s not there to threaten you. Maybe Jungkook wants to tell you that he’s someone you can trust, that despite what you are to each other, at this moment, he can be a friend.

“Thank you, Jungkook,” you manage to say. “Thank you for coming to find me and keeping him away from me. He… he was someone I used to see and I ended things and I thought we were okay. I hadn’t seen him in a while and—”

“You don’t have to explain it to me,” he says softly. “I understand that it’s difficult and reliving it might just make you more scared and upset.“

“But I… I need to say it, at least just this once,” you stammer. “Just so it won’t stay in my head like some made-up reality until I’m convinced it didn’t really happen. Because it did.”

He turns to you, his eyes the most sympathetic you’ve seen them, and he nods.

So you tell him - how Chi-won kept staring at you as you ate, how he pulled you towards him and then caged you against the wall.

“He was too close and I could… smell him, as if he wanted me to remember his scent, and that he didn’t want me to ever forget it,” you say.

Your tears fall slowly this time. Your voice cracks and your nails dig into your skin again. It feels so heavy, that even as you try to expend the negative energy, it’s still there. As if the memory itself is tangible, like a sack of sand filling you from inside and it makes you unable to breathe. 

But the sight of Jungkook’s trembling hands catches your attention, and you turn to him - his jaws tight and his eyes, tense and deep.

“I’m so angry for you,” he heaves, his fists clenching now. He still wants to wipe your tears but he also wants to go back to the restaurant and finally punch that man’s face. “You should file a case. You have all the grounds for that. I can get him fired and he can lose everything.”

“The law and society in general don’t favor us, Jungkook. I don’t have bruises or anything; that’s what they look for. They think that all harm done only leaves visible marks,” you sigh, knowing that there’s not much you can do. “There’s no other witness but you and that itself… might not look good. If I do file a case, he’ll just bring up our past, my past, and taint my reputation. That’ll just ruin me and everything I worked hard for will be for nothing.”

“But you can’t just let him get away with this, ___,” he insists, feeling unusually emotional now. “He hurt you. And what if he does it again? Telling the police can keep him away. I’ll make sure of that.”

The urgency in his voice is something new to you. But you also know he’s right. Jungkook’s family has connections that run deep. He can very well seek revenge for you for all he wants but he wants your permission, he wants to know it’s what you want.

“I… I can’t risk it,” you say. “If by some miracle the case is successful, he’ll just spend a few months in jail or do community service then he’ll be out. He would lose more and I would be the cause of all that. And what if he tries to get revenge? How do I win?”

At his silence, you continue. “That’s right, I can’t.”

“But… don’t you want to fight?” He asks, almost desperately. His tone is low, as if he’s trying to convince himself that fighting back is the answer. “Don’t you want to make sure that he won’t do it again to you?”

“I do, but what if I lose everything in the process, what then?” You counter. “I… I’m not strong enough for that, Jungkook. That’s not a battle I can fight, not when I’m alone here. Not when I’m also just trying to get by.”

You look back at his eyes, helpless and apologetic now, and at this time, this companionship is what you need. It’s as if he’s telling you with them that you may think you’re on your own but you aren’t. Even as you shiver from within, you don’t feel so alone with him next to you.

“I… I was seeing him for a year but things weren’t serious. He probably just wanted to scare me, to assert control because he lacks it in other aspects of his life. Cowards do that, I guess,” you shrug, trying to reason to yourself how someone you knew fairly well could do something like that to you. 

People change, you suppose. Or maybe he’s always been like that; it takes a while sometimes for the demons to come out. 

“But cowards don’t have a right to do that,” Jungkook reasons. “They don’t deserve to just walk away and not deal with the consequences.”

“They don’t. But I don’t deserve to suffer more,” you point out. “The things he said… that’s probably enough revenge on his end, I guess. If he wanted to hurt me, well then, he did.”

There’s an emptiness in your eyes that Jungkook sees. There’s a tinge of submission, as if you accept the pain even if you don’t think you deserve it. And maybe that’s why you’re choosing to fight this battle this way. We can’t do anything about how people hurt us, but we choose how much more we let them do it. 

“Prove him wrong, then,” Jungkook says. “He doesn’t get to tell you that you’ll be miserable your whole life. So chase what makes you happy. And let yourself be loved.”

It’s permission that he doesn’t have a right to grant, but he supposes that if there’s any way you can defeat that man’s voice in your head, it’s by searching for the things you want and fighting to keep them. 

“One day,” you manage to smile at him. “I’ll do those one day.”

It’s like a promise you’re making to him just as you make it to yourself. Jungkook can’t think right now what that would mean. Finding your happiness could lead you anywhere; it sure could lead you away from him. 

“So what happens now?” He asks, hoping there’s a way he could help you get through this.

“I continue living my life and not let this define me,” you shrug, half believing in the power of just pushing through it. “I’ll probably be anxious and paranoid for a while but this is what I can do for now. I’ll just be careful and… learn how to deal with all this one day at a time, I guess.”

“And I’ll have Mr. Ri drive you home every night, at least for these next few weeks. Do you need to move houses?”

“Chi-won doesn’t actually know where I live. I never let him come over. I don’t really like having people in my house.”

Jungkook hums to himself. He isn’t that different from you, it seems. But he takes your word for it, not wanting to impose. There are so many things he wants to do, like ruin that man’s life because things like that can’t go unpunished but he trusts you. At the end of the day, it’s your call, and he respects whatever you decide. He’ll just do what he can to protect you, even if he’ll be worried like hell from here on out, an emotion he’s slowly accepting, knowing what that implies. 

“I’m sorry you had to witness all that,” you say amidst the silence. “And that you have to deal with this now. I don’t… I don’t want you to think that I’m weak and that I don’t stand up for myself.”

“You know you have nothing to apologize for,” he shakes his head. “And not fighting back doesn’t make you weak. I guess staying right where you are is a way of fighting, too.”

“I have people around… somehow,” you comfort yourself. “I’m gonna be fine. I have to believe I will.”

Jungkook nods and manages a smile. At this point, he thinks all he can give you is support and encouragement. He’ll continue to do what he can to keep you safe without disregarding your requests, but staying right where he is with you might just be another way to do that.

“Do you want to pass by somewhere before heading home?” He asks, knowing it’s getting quite late. “A restaurant to grab a drink or something? You didn’t get to have dessert so maybe a cafe?”

“A convenience store is fine,” you smile, knowing the treats that would make you feel better. 

Jungkook chuckles, as it’s a place he didn’t really expect you’d want to go to after an experience like the one you just had. But it’s you and he should be used to you surprising him, so he nods and gestures towards the car. 

It takes five minutes for you to get there and he looks around and asks what you want to have. 

“A cup noodle,” you answer, walking towards the aisle where they’re shelved. “Do you want some? I mean, you eat these things, right?”

“Of course I do,” he scowls at you, picking up one himself. “I just… don’t eat it at a convenience store.”

“Because you don’t go to one?”

“I do. I’m not a spoiled brat who doesn’t know how to do ordinary people things.”

“You mean commoner things,” you raise an eyebrow. “Or plebeian activities. Or non-heir stuff.”

“Whatever. I won’t even defend myself to you,” he huffs, giving in because seeing you amused is a welcome sight. 

“It’s okay. I’m not judging you,” you teasingly smile. “I’m just… laughing at you in my mind.”

You walk towards another aisle and leave him with a smile he’s glad to be making now. He follows and watches you pick up a few more things before you head to the counter where he manages to bring out his card first and pay.

“That's all I can do,” he shrugs after you thank him. 

“You’re doing so much for me already,” you assure him. “Taking me somewhere so I could cry, making sure I get home safe… staying with me.”

“That’s not even enough to—” 

“You don’t know how to accept gratitude, do you?” You ask as you blow on your noodles. “I notice how you brush it off when someone thanks you.”

“Not used to hearing it, I guess,” he shrugs, not thinking it was something you’d pick up, although there’s no lie. 

It’s always been hard for him to say things - that he’s sorry, that he’s thankful, that it’s okay. You, of all people, are the one pointing that out.

“You should be. Because I’ll say it again.” You turn to him and meet his eyes. “Thank you, Jungkook. I thought I’d just go through this alone but I’m not. And that’s… that’s something I’m not used to.”

“You should be,” he repeats your words. “There are some things you shouldn’t be going through on your own. So if there’s anything else you need, you let me know, okay?”

There’s sincerity in his voice as he speaks. You’re used to the low or stern or commanding tone, not this soft and worried one. But it’s the comfort you didn’t know you needed. After spending all that time earlier crying and feeling afraid, being with Jungkook in this bright-lit convenience store is the unexpected warmth that you’re glad you let him give you.

“I will,” you smile. “You know, this is the longest I’ve spoken informally to you. It feels a little weird.”

He laughs as he gets to the same realization. But for him, it almost feels natural.

“It would be weirder if you spoke formally after all that,” he says. “Like I said, if it isn’t about work then I don’t mind.”

You hum in response, not wanting to dwell on the implication. You’re with him after-hours, at a convenience store - that he personally drove you to - where you’re both having cup noodles and soda. This ironically feels more intimate than being in bed with some guy.

You decide to have your dessert, which is really just chocopie, and you mentally curse Chi-won for making you miss the sweet dishes from dinner. But still, you know this one could easily cheer you up. You give one to Jungkook, and his amused tone catches your attention.

“Oh wow, I haven’t had one of these in years,” he says, eating it one bite. “Mother used to give this to me all the time when I was a kid because her best friend owned the company that makes them. There was a time I’d have it as dessert after every meal.”

“Seriously?” You giggle. “That is so weird. This is my favorite. My mom would always buy this for me. When she worked at a school in Busan, she would give it as a treat while I waited for her at the library. That would just always make my day.”

“Hmm, it’s a good snack,” he says, smiling as he takes another piece that you offer and recalls how he used to have this everyday. “So she’d pick you up at the library? Was that your favorite place at school?”

“Hmm, not really, but it reminded me of the one I used to go to,” you reply. “When we lived in Seoul when I was young, there was this family-run library for children in the neighborhood. It was very cozy, with lots of soft chairs and reading nooks on the walls. There were these huge stuffed toys that you could lie on while reading so it felt like someone was hugging you. It had warm lights, not like those usual bright ones. There was this mural of the characters from the books they had,” you narrate, smiling as you remember the days you spent there. 

“Mom would pick me up from school during her lunch break then drop me off at the library where her friend volunteered at and I’d wait until she got off work. When we moved to Busan, I kept looking for it. The one at the school wasn’t the same so I didn’t enjoy it as much, but there was nowhere else to go. Eventually I just got used to it, but the chocopie always made the wait worth it.”

It’s the most you’ve ever told him about yourself and you’re surprised at how easy it was for you to do that. He did tell you a little bit about his childhood earlier though, and you’d like to think it’s your way of returning that kind of vulnerability; a story for a story, a piece of your childhood for a snapshot of his.

You look at him and the small smile on his face. Perhaps he’s thinking the same.

“So you like reading books, then?”

“Not really, actually,” you say, earning you a confused look. “I read all the picture books they had. Those are what I liked. And they had these coloring books and paper dolls and I’d spend hours just working on those. Being there made me feel safe, too; it was like my playground, you know?”

“It’s good you had that, then. Do you still visit that place? The one in your old neighborhood?”

“It shut down years ago, sometime before I returned to Seoul to work,” you sigh. “I didn’t even get to say goodbye to it. The couple who ran it passed away and no one was interested in continuing it because it wasn’t profitable. But the community center nearby has a small library and I go there sometimes, when I’m really upset.”

“And read picture books?” He chuckles.

“Yes, actually,” you smile. “Memories are powerful and we need to let the good ones win. My childhood wasn’t the greatest but I felt like I was in a different world whenever I was in a library so being in one, even as a grown up, reminds me that there are still places where I’m welcome, where I can feel safe, you know? It reminds me that the world hasn’t completely turned dark. I’ve got to hold onto those to not lose myself.”

“That’s one way of putting it. I… I don’t think I’ve been to a playground in years before today. Other than the one that father built in the backyard at least. And I rarely even see it because I’m rarely there. I guess I just…. Let myself get lost.”

“Well, I hope going to one earlier somehow made you find yourself. Or at least reminded you of those good old days, the days when you felt free and safe and happy.”

Jungkook thinks about what he’d felt earlier, that much as being in a playground again brought him back in time, all he kept thinking about was you - alone in that car while you let all your emotions out. He wanted to comfort you but he didn’t know how, and he thinks that maybe it isn’t about finding himself but learning what he’s capable of, and that after all these years, maybe he’s still capable of caring for another person, and maybe that person is you.

“It did,” he hums, meeting your eyes. 

There’s more light in them this time and he wishes it would stay this way. He’d seen you cry months ago and it wasn’t a good feeling, especially because you’d done so because of him. This time, he feels powerless, and he doesn’t know which is worse.

He gets to be with you now though. Perhaps that’s the difference. 

You start cleaning up and it’s his signal for both of you to head out. 

It takes him ten minutes to drive to your place and a small part of you doesn’t want to leave. Even in the silence, you felt calm, something that you hadn’t expected to feel around him, considering his default tense disposition and usual detachment. But there’s something about his presence, about him just being there - he’s not trying too hard to comfort you, he’s not imposing, he’s also not invalidating your feelings. What matters is you’re not alone, and other than him making that effort, it’s also about you, allowing him to do that, something you don’t always do as well.

“Thank you again,” you say once the car has stopped. 

He nods in acknowledgment then turns to you. “It might be best if you take a leave tomorrow, and by that I mean staying home for safety reasons.”

A day to just process everything isn’t such a bad idea, so you agree. 

“If it’s not too much for your friends, maybe they could drive up here so they can be with you. Having people around you that you trust might help in making you feel better.”

“I’ll ask them. I don’t want them to worry but I do need them. So thanks, Jungkook. I appreciate it.”

You exit the car and turn around to wave him goodbye. He smiles as you do, and it’s a sight that helps you sleep later that night - after the long bath and another crying session, after the phone call with your friends who promised to be here in the morning, after the time you spend just hugging your pillow, hoping that you’d stop being scared.

But thinking of Jungkook now makes you feel better and you realize the change again - thinking about him now makes you a little braver. 

You spend that weekend wrapped up in your best friends’ arms. They arrived on Friday morning with some pork bone soup and seafood that they cooked for lunch and dinner. In the middle of the day, Jungkook texted you and asked how you were doing, and you couldn’t hide the smile on your face, which prompted a conversation about your little crush that you didn’t expect to get tense, with Jimin stating that while Jungkook did help you, being attracted to your boss is complicated and would lead to heartbreak. 

You insisted that it was harmless - a half lie, as you hadn’t thought much about it in that sense - and that it’s not something you plan on nurturing. You’re gonna leave the company one day anyway, and you won’t have to deal with him after.

The succeeding days were spent just at home, with you feeling lighter, until Sunday evening when they had to leave, and you felt a little lonely again. 

You try to let that feeling go once you enter Jungkook’s penthouse on Monday morning, knowing that with a day off, you’ll have a lot to make up for and you can’t let anything distract you from your tasks.

That includes the man himself, as he exits his home gym in sweatpants and a dri-fit shirt, the sweat sticking to his body that’s got his chest accentuated. His hair is damp and he’s panting; it’s not exactly the sight you wanted to be greeted with, considering all the thoughts in your head these past few days. You’re reminded that just last week, you’d tried to keep your distance and now, he’s making it incredibly hard for you to do that.

“Hey, how do you feel?” He asks as he takes the glass of water you set for him. “Did you get proper rest?”

“Yes, I did, Mr. Jeon,” you reply. 

“Hmm, we’re back to that again, huh?”

It takes you a while but you pick up that he’s referring to the formalities.

“I’m back on the clock, sir,” you point out. “You are my boss and I need to address you accordingly.”

It’s not a reminder he wanted, given how he’s been worried sick about you since Thursday night. Even an hour of boxing after he got home that evening couldn’t rid him of his anger. He wished he’d noticed how uncomfortable you were at the restaurant; he’s been paying attention to you anyway but he just got so caught up with impressing the festival organizers that he missed out on the signs. If he’d noticed, he would’ve gotten to you earlier and things wouldn’t have escalated. 

He had to control himself from punching that man’s face the moment he saw how close he was to you. Your plea of letting him go was the only thing that kept Jungkook from ruining that man’s life because he really could. He doesn’t think he’ll ever understand it - people like that need to be punished, but it’s people like you who remind him that fighting takes different forms, and you’re the only one who can define what that means. 

But it also doesn’t mean that he can’t get angry for you and he’ll probably feel that for a while. Knowing how you are, he knows you wouldn’t want him to pity you either, so he’ll be what he can be, and that’s someone whom you feel safe around. Regardless, maybe the reminder of your roles in each other’s lives is necessary; it’s what he needs to keep himself from doing more, or wanting to be more.

Jungkook finally acknowledges your statement with a nod and then heads to the bathroom for his shower. Shortly after, you walk towards his closet and prepare his outfits for the week. He meets you in the dining room once he’s dressed, and like clockwork, you fix his tie and his suit.

The effect is minimal but somehow, you’ve found comfort in the routine. What once was a tense and nerve-wracking act is now something automatic and essential for you. In a way, it reinforces your place in his life, but the short distance reminds you that he may be faraway or detached in some aspects but physically, he’s so close. It’s a double-edged sword, really. Some days it’s good, some days it isn’t. Today, it’s the former, and as you look up and meet his eyes, the softness in them says he thinks the same.

You go over your usual with him while munching on some pastries that Mr. Ri was ordered to buy and bring up. The ride to the office is filled with discussions on the upcoming year-end events. When you arrive, you attend two straight meetings before having another one over lunch. You accompany Jungkook to a store opening located in one of their properties after that and it’s 4PM by the time you’re able to sit on your desk for more than 30 seconds. You’ve got two hours to finish what you can today but you find yourself spacing out every few minutes.

Perhaps it’s because it’s the first time since Friday that you’re on your own. Your best friends made sure not to leave you by yourself for those three days - Soomin held you while you slept and silently cried in her arms, and Jimin hugged you for much of the day. Their affection was what you badly needed, and now that you’re without it, somehow you feel incomplete and anxious and somewhat unstable. 

Scenes are hazy in your mind. You’re at least thankful they’re not vivid anymore unlike a few nights ago, but the dim lights and the stench of the alley come to you without warning, and you suddenly freeze in panic. Your fingers tremble as you try to type away, your eyes unblinking as the tears coat them, and you feel sick to your stomach that you want to just be buried in the covers at this moment.

The door opening causes you to jerk in your seat and Jungkook stops mid-sentence to walk over to you. 

“Hey, ___. You can go home,” he says. “It’s been a long day.”

“I… I don’t know if that’ll help,” you admit. “I don’t know if being alone is what I need.”

You go home to an empty apartment just like he does, he reminds himself. He knows what that’s like. It’s why he spends most weekends in the clubs where it’s loud and crowded; those somehow mask the emptiness that can get tiring when all he has is himself. Being on your own is good sometimes; sometimes it also isn’t.

But Jungkook doesn’t know what he can offer you. His presence isn’t something exactly enticing nor comforting; he wouldn’t wanna be with him, too, if he was in a similar position.  

“Is there a way that your friends can spend another few days with you? What about your mother?” He asks. 

“They have lives back home,” you sigh. “I… I’m okay.”

“You don’t have to force it if you aren’t,” he insists. “I may not know much but I know enough that these things take time. I…”

I wish I could do more for you, he wants to say.

“I don’t have anything urgent for today,” he says instead. “You can clock off now and Mr. Ri and I can take you home.”

“That’s not necessary,” you say immediately. 

“I insist,” he replies. “At least for the next few days until we’re sure that you’re not in danger.”

You nod, not having the energy to reason with him. At least you don’t have to think about how to commute home without risking being too close to strangers. 

You pack your things and get in the car, with Jungkook letting you bask in the mellow sounds of the radio while he doodles on his leather notebook. You’re tempted to ask him what he’s drawing just to add some more noise but you decide against it, choosing instead to close your eyes and force unpleasant images away from your mind so you can train yourself to do it this time.

It works. Except, it’s the smile of the man next to you that you see, and when you open your eyes, it’s the same thing that greets you. 

He chuckles when you look around and realize that you’re home.

“I was trying to wake you but you wouldn’t budge,” he explains. “Are you just tired or you haven’t been sleeping well?”

“Oh, I just kept waking up last night. I guess that’s why. I’m sorry for making you wait.”

“It’s okay,” he says softly. “Just try to get some rest and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

You nod and exit the car, feeling out of sorts even as you enter your apartment and know you’re safe inside. You nibble on some leftover pizza and try to entertain yourself with the variety shows on TV but you end up spacing out. You curl in bed, trying as much to feel comfort from your pillow that lays stiff next to you. 

You’re not big on physical affection, and most days you’re glad you aren’t because you don’t get any of it anyway, but tonight, it’s what you need. Tonight, you just want that warmth, you want a body to curl into and arms to pull you close. You want hands to caress you and soft lips to plant kisses on the places that hurt. You want to hear soft laughter and random musings and plans for the next day.

The vision ends when you realize that you haven’t experienced much of that before. There were moments during the months you spent with the men you’ve dated, but the feeling of safety was lacking, the warmth wasn’t warm enough, and the desire wasn’t overwhelming. You realize that it wasn’t intimacy you feared; losing it or finding out it wasn’t enough is what you were afraid of, and it’s why you always pulled away. No one ever seemed worth it to try or to stay a little longer for. 

You sigh to yourself as you will the tears not to fall. The loneliness can get to you sometimes, especially on days when there’s a kind of pain that’s hard to talk about and all you need is comfortable silence and understanding without words. But you try to push through. You’ve been on your own for so long anyway. Even when you had someone, you still came home to an empty apartment and you still felt like it was enough when it was just you around. 

You’re unsure if the desire for something more is just because of what you experienced, if the forced closeness and Chi-won’s burning touch hurt you too much or if you’ve been wanting that intimacy all along. Or if someone’s made you realize that you’re ready for it, that it’s actually worth it. 

You manage to fall asleep and drag yourself off the bed to head to Jungkook’s apartment the next day. You drop him off at a restaurant for a breakfast meeting before going to the office where you get to work. It’s a busy day that has you meeting with different departments and coordinating with the organizing teams for the upcoming end-of-year events. 

It’s mid-afternoon when you decide to go to the outdoor garden just right off the elevators, surprised to find Jungkook standing by the railings. Dressed in a dark gray suit, he’s got his hands in his pockets while he looks out at the busy streets, and you wonder what goes on in his mind when he looks at views like this.

The sound of the door closing catches his attention, and he turns around, surprised as well to see you here.

“Everything okay?” He asks.

“Yes, I just needed a breather.”

“Am I giving you too much work again?” He shakes his head, finding humor in it now after you pointed out one time how he once gave you so many things to do.

“It’s part of the job, Mr. Jeon. I’ve accepted that now,” you giggle, walking towards where he is then standing some feet away. “But it’s been a busy day and I just needed some air.”

“You can also take a longer break if that’s what you need.”

“I’m okay,” you assure him. “The busyness helps. I’ll get tired and hopefully fall asleep easily and then do it all again tomorrow and the next day.”

It’s a strategy Jungkook knows well because it’s something he does. Being a perfectionist helps because then, he can work himself to the bone without realizing it until he’s entered his apartment. One glass of whiskey and then he’s falling asleep on the couch. 

Weekends are tough, which is why partying and hooking up is his go-to. His best friends have asked him a few times what he’s striving towards, what he’s looking forward to and he couldn’t answer. At one point he stopped wondering, but now he wonders about you.

“What do you look forward to, then?” He asks. 

“Vacation, I guess,” you shrug. “I get to be with my friends and family but then that flies too quickly then I’m back to this routine. So maybe… I look forward to the day when I start savoring the moment, when I start enjoying what’s in front of me, when I start… feeling less alone.”

The last words come out subconsciously, prompting you to turn away out of shame. It’s not an easy thing to admit. You wanted this anyway. You chose to leave home to pay back a debt and then decided to stay because you wanted to prove yourself. You chose to not commit to anyone because the pain of loneliness is much easier to bear than the pain of losing someone. This is on you, and you deal with the consequences everyday. 

Jungkook doesn’t look confused nor curious. There’s a look in his eyes that you catch before his gaze returns to the streets below. It’s understanding; you realize he knows exactly what you’re talking about. And perhaps he’s on the same boat - letting life just pass him by despite the craziness of it all, perhaps wondering when he’ll stop to smell the roses or watch the sunset or listen to the birds. Maybe like you, he’s wondering when he’ll get to do those with a hand to hold and a body to curl into.

The silence is cut short when you’re alerted that Jungkook’s meeting with the Arts Center project teams starts in 15 minutes. You remind him about it then you both head out and go to your desks to prepare. You’re seated on your chair when you look inside his room, meeting his eyes as he looks outside towards you. There’s a small smile on his face that gives you comfort. It’s soft and assuring, and it’s definitely what you need. 

Maybe you can start with this, you think, as he nods at you then meets you at your desk to walk towards the conference room. Maybe these are the things you can start savoring before the day comes that you have to leave this place - these moments of quiet assurance, of understanding, of subtle comfort that tells you that despite the walls between you, he’ll be looking out for you even from afar.

The weeks fly by like a blur. 

The Thursday after the incident, Jungkook informed you that he got word from the restaurant manager that Chi-won returned to his home in Mokpo to stay with his parents. The next day, you took the train home to Daegu to be with your mom. She hugged you that night as you cried to her, feeling the strength that she’s had all these years, knowing that you have to be just like her and that this time, you have to be strong for her and for yourself. 

Spending time with her, Min-woo, and the girls was rejuvenating, and they promised to visit you in Seoul more regularly. They were in your apartment two weekends after, and it truly felt like you’ve become the family you’ve always wanted to have.

Work continued to be hectic as the year-end activities approached. The busyness definitely helped in moving past what you experienced, allowing you to detach from the memories. You gained the strength to keep fighting the way you wanted, and the people around you continued to be supportive and respectful.

Despite all that went on, you managed in organizing the events while also attending to some that Jungkook was invited to. 

The first one was organized by the VP’s Office for the partners of projects that it managed, with the other departments attending as well. It was well-organized, and CEO Jeon himself expressed his satisfaction with how the event came together. Jungkook’s speech was impressive. He ran it with you multiple times and he was able to shake off the anxiety by the time he got to the stage. His eloquence enraptured you; so did the way he looked in another Kim Taehyung-customized textured black suit that had you constantly internally smacking yourself because of all the times that Yoongi caught you staring. You were in full denial about your little crush but knowing your friend, he probably had you figured out, and he’d been kind enough not to push it.

The next event was a big one, as the company hosts an annual fellowship dinner for all its partners, which you had a big role in organizing. A few of you were housed in the serviced apartment building near the office leading up to it, as per Jungkook’s instructions, given that he didn’t want any of you commuting or driving home late at night. You remember how he’d said that he couldn’t risk any of his staff’s safety so casually, and you didn’t think he could be more attractive than that moment. Until, of course, when he showed up in his charcoal suit and parted hair, confidently entertaining the guests and delivering another impressive message. You snuck in a few looks later in the evening as he intently watched a ballad performer on stage, his legs crossed as he drank the flute of champagne and licked the remnants of it on his lips, causing your throat to dry up and promise yourself that you’ll get rid of this crush soon enough.

It doesn’t happen, as the final event of the year rolls around. The fellowship dinner this time is with all the staff, including some from the Southeast Asian office. Jungkook goes for a cream-colored suit this time, a light and clean look that makes him look fresh yet sophisticated. You managed to be professional every time he called for you, and you suppose it’s all the stress getting to you, but being near him made you a little anxious - there was a bit of giddiness that you didn’t want to show, but he somehow also calmed you down. The fact that he kept offering you water and making sure you had something to eat didn’t help. You blurted out that you didn’t expect him to be as thoughtful as he was, and when he said that neither did he but that you brought out that side of him after the incident at the restaurant, you had to keep your cool and act unbothered. He looked shy after, and you suppose that he didn’t mean to say it. But he did, and the words kept you up for the nights after.

You know you’re entering prohibited territory at this point and you wish there’s a way out before you get deep into the woods. You let Soomin and Jimin remind you everyday that you can’t nurture the crush, that the attraction can’t be anything more, that there are serious implications if you did, and that you’re gonna have to get over this as soon as possible. It’s Yoongi who tells you to not overthink it, that the more you force yourself out, the harder it actually becomes. 

“There are things you just let happen,” he’d said. “That’s how they eventually fall away.”

“That’s how they get worse, too,” you responded. 

“They could go either way, but resisting often ends up hurting more.”

You decide to just let the wave take you along while you train yourself to savor the moments for what they are without giving meaning to them. A smile is just a smile, a look is just a look. You know you’ll be without them one day. Just a few more months until you leave the company, and you won’t have a reason to be around Jungkook anymore. At least before then, you can hold onto whatever memories you retain, and you can learn to look back at them with gratitude that during your hardest moments, he made you feel safe.

It’s now towards the end of December and it’s the Tuesday before Jungkook is set to leave for his three-week vacation tomorrow. He called for an early dinner with the team at his new favorite Italian restaurant, wanting to properly say goodbye before you’ll all be without him for a while.

“Savor it, it won't last long,” he teases. “The holidays will be over soon and then I’ll be back before you know it. So enjoy this time that I’m not around.”

“What do you mean, sir? We’ll obviously miss you!” Do-hyun exclaims. “Mostly the once-in-a-blue-moon lunch and dinner treats and the occasional funny remarks but yeah, we’ll definitely feel your absence around.”

Her exaggerated smile lets everyone know she’s teasing, even if you know deep down, she’s telling the truth. Jungkook’s come around these past months, spending a bit of time with each team member and learning their strengths and weaknesses, mentoring the young ones, and sending pastries or dessert during the most hectic days. He’s still serious most of the time and doesn’t join the occasional post-work dinner that Do-hyun guilt trips you into going. There’s always so much to do and his perfectionism has rubbed off on everyone else, but he has his moments. And you know the team appreciates his efforts, too. 

“We’ll see. Maybe when I come back you guys will want another boss or something,” he baits.

“That was like, the first two months of you in your role, Mr. Jeon, but we’re over it,” Do-hyun admits, causing Manager Lee to panic.

He glares at her the way Chin-sun does, but you sit there giggling. Jungkook’s chuckling, too, unable to hide his amusement at the young one’s bluntness. 

She apologizes but Jungkook brushes it off, saying those first months weren’t his best. You don’t miss the way he looks at you, though, and you’ve trained yourself to not think too much about it, the way you’ve trained yourself these past weeks to just accept his smiles and glances as they are. 

“I also took you all here to thank you for this past half-year,” Jungkook continues. “It was tough. I was tough. And it was a big adjustment for everyone but you all showed how good you are as individuals and as a team and I… I needed that.”

“You led us very well, Mr. Jeon,” Manager Lee assures him. “And tough love works sometimes.”

“I suppose it does, and it goes both ways,” Jungkook replies. “And so to thank you, I got you all a little Christmas gift, something you can enjoy when you go on your respective breaks.”

At his words, you distribute the letter envelopes to the team and they open them up, gasping in surprise and in obvious delight. 

Jungkook instructed you last week to purchase two vouchers at a luxurious spa for each staff member, hoping that a bit of relaxation can help you all. You were speechless when he said which specific package he wanted, and even if you know the price is just change for him, it was still more than you expected.

“A body scrub, massage, facial, and high tea, on top of the use of their super fancy amenities?” Do-hyun enumerates, her eyes widening in awe. “That’s a full day of being luxurious and feeling rich! Mr. Jeon, this is amazing! I’m totally going by myself and going twice!”

You laugh at her antics, not surprised she’d go that route.

“This is so timely, sir,” Manager Lee says. “My wife and I are celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary next month. This is gonna be a good date.”

“And it’s my birthday in a few weeks,” Chin-sun adds. “This would be so lovely to do with my husband.”

“My girlfriend and I fought so I think she’ll forgive me after I take her with me,” Yohan says, earning him a few laughs.

“What about you, ___? Inviting anyone special?” Do-hyun asks.

“Yes, my mom,” you answer. “She’s visiting next week, then we’ll go home to Daegu for the holidays. I’m sure she’d love this.”

“Ugh, of course. Parents come first,” she sighs.

You laugh her comment and turn to Jungkook, thanking him again for the gift. He thanks you for organizing them, too, and the dinner proceeds with candid spa stories and what you’re all doing for the holidays. 

Everyone heads home from the restaurant except for you and Jungkook who return to the office to run through last minute instructions and reminders before he flies in the morning. 

You’ve got over a week before your own vacation starts  where you’ll spend a few days in Wando, Min-woo’s hometown, but that also means needing to get a lot done before that, and then returning to backlogs after but you’ll worry about that next year. Right now, you’ve got documents that need Jungkook’s signatures and some memos you need him to approve. 

It’s another hour until you finish, even if a big part of you doesn’t want him to go just yet. Three weeks feels so long when seeing him five times a week for 12 hours was your everyday these past six months. It’s gonna feel a little odd not having your morning routines and car rides. You remind yourself that you’re gonna have to start getting used to that, given that you’re gonna be letting it all go soon enough. Still, it doesn’t mean you won’t miss it. It doesn’t mean you won’t miss him. 

“Have you packed everything, Mr. Jeon? Do you have enough coats? You can get pretty cold. What about all your documents? Did you—”

“Yes, I have,” he chuckles, finding it endearing how you’re speaking too fast and making sure he’s got everything ready. 

It’s not your job since this is a personal trip but he supposes that lines have blurred a while back, and he won’t deny that he’s enjoying this bit, especially seeing you worry. He wonders if you’ll miss him, too, but he won’t risk asking you even just to tease.

“I’ve gone on trips before, ___. I think I’ll be fine.”

“Just making sure that things are okay. Because I’m definitely gonna be the one you’ll call if they aren’t.”

“Fair point,” he laughs. “But everything’s good. Hoseok has been bugging me and making sure as well. He doesn’t want anything to mess up this trip.”

“It’s really sweet that he insisted you join him and A-yeong,” you gush. “They love their winter trips and I love seeing all their photos afterwards. I can just imagine how beautiful these ones are gonna be.”

“Well, he says he misses me,” Jungkook shrugs. “I was away for a long time and frankly, we’re more colleagues here than family, so he insisted I go with them. But I also think they just want a photographer because the sights are obviously gonna be gorgeous and I happen to take pretty good photos, you know?”

“I wouldn’t argue against that,” you laugh. “Surely being the third-wheel photographer has its perks?”

“We’ll see. I’ll definitely take advantage.”

“I’m sure they’ll spoil you somehow,” you say. “And you get to enjoy the landscape and the fresh air and the northern lights. Those are definitely gonna look good in pictures.”

“I’ll make sure to take them, then. And show you,” he smiles. “But yeah, I’m looking forward to a different scenery.”

“Where would you have gone if they didn’t ask you to come?”

“Not sure. Maybe to Brazil with Tae and Seokjin. Or somewhere like Hong Kong; I went there last year on my own. This time is gonna be different.”

“And you’ll have companions. That would be nice.”

“It would. That’s different, too, but I’m sure it will be good.”

You think about Jungkook spending his break on his own in a foreign country, navigating it by himself, meeting people, being left alone in his own thoughts. Maybe an occasional companion for the night. Or every night. Perhaps drinking on a rooftop bar to welcome the new year. But just him and no one else. You wonder how lonely that might feel, and you’re glad that at least this time, he can be around people who truly care about him. 

Jungkook thinks of how else he can keep you longer, knowing he’ll be without you for three weeks which for him, is an extremely long time. 

“Remember to enjoy your time there, okay? Don’t think too much about work,” you pout, knowing he still will.

“___, I’ll be on vacation but I won’t be on a break. You know I’ll still expect updates until next week. I’m gonna go crazy if I don’t know what’s going on.”

“Of course you will,” you tease. “I’ll make sure to keep you posted. I’ll send emails for approvals, maybe call if something urgent comes up.”

“You’re the only one allowed to bother me, about anything. Remember that.”

He says the words with such finality, as if there’s no way for you to resist. You wouldn’t anyway. Other than knowing that you’ll definitely be bugging him for approvals and such, you also would want to know how he’s doing, if he’s enjoying his time away and if he’s getting enough rest. 

“I will,” you assure him. “So, uh. You should head out and get some sleep. It’s gonna be a long flight.”

He nods, knowing that he needs to let you go this time. He decides against offering to take you home - you’ve been insisting that it’s not necessary, and that you’ve been fine with your bus rides to your neighborhood in the evening. He doesn’t want to sound desperate so he finally says goodbye.

He lingers, as he doesn’t move for a good half minute and just stands there by your desk, giving you a look to express things that he can’t ever say. 

“Goodbye, Jungkook. Take care of yourself out there,” you finally say. 

“Goodbye, ___. You do the same. I’ll see you when I get back.”

It’s another few seconds before he manages to start walking away. One last glance then he leaves. And he convinces himself that the sullen look in your eyes means that you’ll be thinking about him while he’s away, the same way he’ll be thinking about you, perhaps while he looks at the sky, knowing it’s the same one you’ll be looking at, and then you wouldn’t feel so far away. 

The time on your watch reads 11:10. The plane should be leaving anytime soon, and you wonder how Jungkook is doing, if he was able to sleep well and eat at the airport lounge. You at least know he got there on time. Mr. Ri arrived some time ago to say that he’s dropped Jungkook off and that he was instructed to take you to work and bring you home until your boss comes back from his vacation. You didn’t argue, knowing that it’s Jungkook’s way of making things convenient for you, given all the responsibilities you have to carry while he’s away. 

But other than that, you don’t know how he’s doing without any update from him. Which is silly for you to even expect. This is a personal trip, after all, and even if the line has somehow blurred after everything that’s happened between you two, you shouldn’t be waiting for some message about him having boarded or something. You’ll maybe just wait for his email asking for updates about his father’s comments on the policies that Jungkook drafted for approval. Or once A-yeong has posted on social media that they’ve landed. 

You shake your head, knowing that liquidating expenses is more important right now than your boss. But then your phone beeps and the smile on your face is immediate.

[From: VP Jeon] The plane arrived late so we just boarded. I’ll get some work done during the flight but I just emailed you an end-of-year message for staff. Can you check if it sounds good? 

[To: VP Jeon] I will, sir. Have a safe flight. 

[From: VP Jeon] Thanks. I’ll let you know when we’ve landed.

Simple and professional, you think, but somehow the thought of him messaging you before takeoff - even if it’s work-related - has you feeling giddy. There’s no desire for more. Just knowing he’s okay and also still thinking of you has you satisfied.

You don’t get to wipe off the smile quick enough for Yoongi not to see, as you hear him clearing his throat, prompting you to look up and see his amused face.  

“I was just checking in to see how you’re coping with your boss away but it seems you’re doing fine,” he starts. “Unless… he’s the reason why you’re smiling.”

Your silence confirms his suspicion, and he merely laughs in response. 

“Yah! You’re supposed to reprimand me,” you pout at him.

“And what would that do?” He challenges. “You’re an adult. ___. You feel what you feel, you do what you do. It’s up to you how you want this to play out.”

“Well, I’ll tell you how it will play out,” you say. “I will continue doing what I’m supposed to do, wait for the Arts Center to open, resign, then never have to see or think about him again. And I’ll be content with that.”

Yoongi doesn’t press or counter you, choosing instead to just agree with your plan and be the supportive friend you need him to be, even if your eventual resignation will make him incredibly sad. 

You’re very particular with the people you let in, with the people you allow to become an important part of your life. He’s lucky he didn’t scare you away for you to distance yourself from him, and though you didn’t return his feelings, he supposes that’s better. He gets to be someone you feel comfortable enough to be with, to be honest with, and that’s more than he can ask for. However you choose to approach whatever it is you’re feeling for Jungkook, his friend who’s just as cautious when it comes to people, Yoongi will just be there like he has all these years. 

“Anyway, is that all you came here for? To know how I was doing?” You ask.

“I sent you the designs and proposals I need Jungkook to go through,” Yoongi responds. “He said to submit them and he’ll review those while he’s there. I wasn’t going to since I want him to actually rest and enjoy his vacation but he’ll be on my ass about it.”

He explains his vision, which you note down so you can articulate it when Jungkook asks. Yoongi leaves you to work on all your tasks, making sure to send you a teasing smile on his way out.

You continue with your day, ending it with an email to your boss about what transpired and the documents he needs to approve. He responds past 1AM the next day during his layover in Amsterdam. Two hours after that, he messages you that they’ve arrived in Denmark and will have dinner before going to bed. 

It’s the day after, on a Friday, when he schedules a video call with you that has you fixing your hair and retouching your lipstick before picking up. He shows up on the screen donned in a white jumper, his unstyled hair making him look cozy and much more boyish than you’re used to. You let yourself be familiarized with the scene, with him seated by a desk with the large window behind him showing clear blue skies and colorful structures. He seems to do the same, as the silence lingers for the next half a minute or so. 

He speaks up first, greeting you and asking how you’ve been. 

“I’m okay, Mr. Jeon. Getting a lot done on the post-event admin work,” you reply. “How about you? You  look refreshed and relaxed. That’s a new sight to see.”

“It’s probably the Copenhagen air,” he says. “It’s gorgeous out here. And the buildings are beautiful. We’re staying at this nice boutique hotel that Hoseok and I explored yesterday. It’s giving us ideas for a serviced apartment with this kind of design. Or maybe villas by the mountains.”

“Oh, talking about work while on vacation, I see,” you shake your head. “I bet A-yeong regrets inviting you to join them.”

“Maybe another day of Hoseok and I just going to hotels and random buildings and she already will,” he laughs. “It’s work but also not. It’s nice to feel inspired by the surroundings. I realized that doesn’t really happen when I’m there.”

“Oh I’m sure. You’re VP Jeon when you’re here and there, you’re just a regular person, a traveler, an architect. As long as you’re getting the rest that you deserve,” you smile. 

“That’s true,” he nods, taking your words in. 

He’s just him while he walks past the canal, while he explores the city and its vibrant structures; he’s just a man in a foreign country who doesn’t have to connect with people, he just has to connect with what’s around him. 

“So, let’s go over your email and the things I need to review and approve,” he continues.

Your hour-long meeting proceeds with approvals and instructions, and he impresses you with how much he’s done despite being on vacation. You suppose he’s still jet lagged and is just taking advantage, but you remind him again that the weekend is coming and you won’t be working, so neither should he. 

“I know, don’t worry,” he assures you. “We’re heading to other towns these next few days before taking the train to Sweden. I’ll have time to work but also to enjoy the scenery.”

“That’s good. I’m glad you’re able to take a break from all the craziness back here,” you say, meaning it. 

He works so hard and you always wonder if he allows himself to breathe, to take a pause so he can look forward to something, and then savor it when it comes.

“Me, too. So when you take your vacation, I expect the same from you, alright?” 

“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that, sir,” you laugh. “I am gonna completely shut out once I clock off next Friday. You won’t hear from me until I’m back here.”

“Of course,” he says after a beat of silence. “You deserve a longer break, actually. You know you can always request for an extension.”

“It’s okay. I don’t want to deal with so much backlog,” you respond. “I don’t really have anywhere else to go and people to drag with me. Plus, I’ll have a few days off for my birthday next month so I’ll definitely have more chances for rest.”

Jungkook nods, knowing that time will be bittersweet for him because you’ll get to have your break while he’ll be without you. Just like how it is now, as he’s on this vacation while you’re left to do so much work thousands of miles away from him. It also means he doesn’t get to do his routine with you, something that’s given him comfort and a sense of stability these past months. Seeing you through this call is his only way to remain connected with you, a chance to know how you’re doing, a moment to hear your voice and see the smile he’s been without. It’s just been two days but he already feels it’s much longer.

He finally lets you go, knowing you’ll be clocking out soon. Even if he doesn’t want to yet, he says goodbye. 

As you asked, he savors their second day in the city, but he sees you everywhere - in all the greenery that he passes, in the library down the street, in the cafe with all the pastries that they eat at, and in the sky as he falls asleep at night. There’s comfort in knowing it’s the same one you wake up to every morning.

Not having Jungkook this long is a little disorienting. Sure, he’s been away a few times, but he’d still call or message to ask something or to give you instructions. It’s become your habit to bring him coffee every few hours, and you find yourself making one only to realize that he isn’t around. 

Seeing him in A-yeong’s social media feels quite intrusive, but you couldn’t help but watch her Instagram stories, with him in a green fleece jumper as he walked down charming streets last Saturday, and then a black coat over a blue sweatshirt as he strolled the beachside on Sunday. He called the day before, on Tuesday afternoon, for your regular check-in, another hour of talking about work, even if all you wanna hear about is how his days have been. You’ve never thought about it as much before, but somehow seeing him in this way makes you care, it makes you want to know what he’s feeling, what he’s thinking.

You shake away the thoughts as Wednesday ends. It’s been a week since he left and there’s over two more weeks until he’s back. You’ll have another call on Friday and there won’t be another one until you return from your own vacation, and the thought saddens you, knowing there won’t be a reason for either of you to reach out.

But you take it as a challenge, as a way for you to slowly get him out of your system. Hopefully being without him for a while will help.

Friday comes and the call with Jungkook goes a little longer than usual. It’s towards the end when Hoseok and A-yeong make an appearance, as they’re all staying at a rental by the lake in a town in Sweden, and are about to have their breakfast.

“___!” Hoseok chirps. “Is my cousin still working you to the bone?”

“Asks the man who has hours-long meetings with his assistant every other day. If I may say, Hoseok, you’re driving Bitna crazy. I think I just saw her earlier pulling her hair out,” you tease.

“Ah, I don’t blame her. There’s just too much going on,” he sighs. “But at least I’m off her back now. It’s your last day before your break, you shouldn’t even be working right now! You should just be hanging out with the team before you all go out for dinner!”

“Like you said, there’s just too much going on,” you counter. 

“These men never stop working, do they?” A-yeong huffs from next to her husband, prompting you to nod in agreement. She turns to Jungkook with her arms on her waist. “I’m telling you now, Kook, how are you gonna find a girlfriend when all you do is work, work, party, work, party, and work? Hmm?”

Jungkook chuckles, his hand behind his neck as he tries to give an answer. You can imagine A-yeong hampering him about this, given that she’s quite the proponent when it comes to companionship. It’s why she’s always patient with Hoseok, and why they love each other as much as they do. There’s understanding and respect, there’s trust and honesty. She’s not afraid to tell him when she feels neglected, and he makes up for it immediately.

“I’ll find her when I’m meant to,” Jungkook responds. “But anyway, I was just about to let ___ go.”

“Finally,” Hoseok says. Turning to you, he gives you that warm smile that you adore. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure he doesn’t bug you during your break.”

“Good,” you respond, even if the thought saddens you a little. “Anyway, it looks so pretty out there. I’m so glad you’re all enjoying it.”

“It is! And the sights are spectacular, ___. It’s definitely a must-visit,” Hoseok replies. 

“One day,” you say, knowing it’ll probably never happen. Still, you indulge him. “I’ll settle with pictures for now, so you better take lots of them for me to see.”

“Ah, Kook is the resident photographer! He’s been taking a lot so he’ll show you.”

“That would be nice,” you smile. “Anyway, I don’t want to keep you from enjoying your day. So I’ll go ahead. I’ll see you all when you get back!”

They bid you goodbye, and there’s that nod again, that smile, that softness that you’ve started getting used to seeing on Jungkook. It’s what you think about during the team dinner an hour later, while in the car going home as soft music plays, and as you fall asleep.

You hold onto that last image of him, until the next day when A-yeong posts on her socials again. It’s those snippets of his life that make you pause during the day and keep you up at night. There’s so much about him that you’re drawn to, that you want to get to know, that you want to protect. 

He’s like a movie that plays in the local theater - captivating, intriguing, yet you remain a spectator and then it ends, moving on and you’ve only got the memory of it etched in your mind. It’s not yours to watch whenever you want and no matter how much you try to analyze it, it’ll always just be your interpretation, not his. He’ll remain as a moving image that you want so much to capture but seems too big, too overwhelming, too far. 

But there are instances when you think you’ve got him for a second, that you understand him a little. There are moments like arriving at his penthouse the morning after he gets back from his trip with his mussed hair and oversized jumper that he feels more human, more flawed, more tangible. 

It’s when he smiles at you and says that it’s nice to see you again that he feels within reach. It’s also the moment you realize that him being away didn’t really help. If anything, it intensified that feeling that you know you can’t have. You’re gonna lose him one day, and when you do, you hope for only the good memories to stay. 

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miles from home — snippet

“Holy shit” The water graces your hands, each stroke through it bringing about bluish light that reflects on your face.

Jungkook watches you from afar, hands in the pockets of his shorts hanging loosely around his torso.

“This is so much better than having a house full of lights.” You nod at the passerby, maybe a couple of tourists exploring the sea at night, catching Jungkook’s eyes in the process.

“Doesn’t mean you should leave it open and go walk your dog.” He moves towards you, just enough for the waves to pass through his feet, catching each brush of your fingers against the water.

“You’re just so impossible to talk to.” 

“You hungry?” Your head tilts in confusion at the sudden question.

“Matty, stay.” He warns the excited golden retriever almost disappearing under the sand, rolling around at the mention of food.

“Bet you haven’t had authentic hwae yet, I know a place.” He says in between wrestling Matilda and trying to convince you for an impulsive market trip at almost 12 am.

Yoongi would take at least an hour to fix the electricity up, and you’ll have Matty under control with Jungkook around.

And free food? Count you fucking in.

writing miles from home and.. i think i wanna make it into a series..?

food for thought.

NO ONE, BUT YOU ⋆ 전정국

. . . . KISS ME, dangerous. been so lost without you all around me . . .

pairing, jungkook x model f!reader tags/warnings, little suggestive/allusion to smut, fwb2l, not too plot heavy js vibes lol note, slightly edited version of one of my drafts while i work on other longer wips <3 taglist, @ggukivrse @bangatanily | click here to join taglist! love diaries music rec, "Shirt"— SZA

feedback is appreciated! xx

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

"Hold my hand in secret and kiss me when no one's looking."

Eyes skimming around the sky now felt like a burden, you just wanted to give up and collapse, finally, onto the couch or the ground would even do— for how you felt like a human wrapped in a cyclone, world feeling dizzy as fuck.

There behind, as the only source of light apart from the moon ablaze —an otherwise fluttering sight to drink in, if it weren't for the current scenario— lay your phone, chats blowing up like gushing water following a drought.

Him, Jungkook, is your best friend but with benefits. A mutual help was what you agreed upon but eventually it became really hard for your heart to continue to bottle up the feelings growing in, with each touch, each caress and each contact. Skin to skin.

Walking up towards the little table across the balcony, you pick up your phone, scanning the texts you just received from Jungkook. How he portrayed all the words, you couldn't believe he was feeling so. 

Reciprocated. 

Your love was bound back in all means from his fucking heart. Jeon Jungkook's heart. 

Days ago, you were shattered by what he asked for, after you had your timbers shivering and knees clamping in all seriousness of the confession he presented before you.

Everything seemed to wash into your mind all at once, making things twice as hard. Tossing the gadget away, landing safe on the couch, his chat was still open. You took yourself into your well-kept bedroom, for a cup of water so that every piece of information, each adversity and ecstasy would sink in thoroughly.

"Hold my hand in secret and kiss me when no one's looking."

These couple of words echoed to and fro inside your tight heart, remembering when this was part of the "contract" / help you were lending to each other. He needed you, but was scared of society. A shit ton of insecurities ate him up alive each time, when he thought about how he'll be judged to be "using" you, the daughter of a revered model in South Korea. 

But all you know is, you love him for good. You'd never regret being his friend and now, someone he loves. Society has clamped a huge pressuring weight on each one’s shoulder. Sometimes it is the constant nagging to remain perfect. Sometimes it's how you're not perfect / likable. 

You don't give two hoots about the media, your "famous" family and your friends who go blind at shiny things. You'd gave no fucks about big and bold in the community. If you got the chance now, like right now, it'll be you on one knee with an imperfectly perfect paper ring, proposing to someone who already has your heart wrapped around in his strong fists. 

"Oh, Jeon. You make me fucking crazy." You whisper, now, admiring the sky feels less a burden, that heart of yours somehow eased into peace.

She flipped, landed and spun in circles every time he touched you. Everytime his fingers came in contact with the one tiny tattoo resting on top of the skin right next to your sternum. Everytime he kissed you there and traced it with his tongue.

Funny how you address your heart as if it was a person, right? It is. Now, she has safely landed upon something, hilarious much, again how she found peace, her world in the chaos.

"Can I take her for a ride then?" You jumped at the sudden cameo of a familiar raspy voice. Yes. That's it. It's the very voice you longed to hear, even after all the confusion and frustration. 

"Jungkook.." Oh. So you've been thinking out loud. Not embarrassing at all.

"Are you gonna let me in or should I stay hanging on your balcony?" He tightens the grip around the railing, trying to stay intact.

"Shit, sorry." You finally move, grabbing his wrists, surely not helping much as he pulls up and jumps over, hands landing taut around your waist as soon as he's on ground-level.

His eyes roam around yours, spewing a thousand words through its gaze.

And her. Your heart.

She was absolutely down. Damn much.

Toppling over and crash landing in the walls trying to break out and finally run into his heart.

"Calm down you stupid little organ. I'm not affected. No, not one bit." 

You ironically smiled at him, as he raised a brow at you. Amusement written across his annoyingly good looking face.

"Stop."

"You're making me feel, Han." He spat, fierce and quiet.

"Stop this, or I might lose myself. And I'm fucking not taking myself back. Ever."

You exhaled, the anxiety slowly waving goodbye. He's playing.

"Is that so? Then hold my hand and make me yours as the world witnesses us, Jungkook. I know for a fact that nothing can change now. It’s now, or never." Both of you were deprived. It's been days since you saw him after the controversy that arose along with a few pictures of you spending time with him, all around social media.

It immediately sent your mind to overdrive, already seeing an end to the 6 month long arrangement.

But more than that, the years long friendship you shared with this man standing in front of you.

However, his eyes swam over yours, alerting you that he doesn't give a fuck. None about the media, none about your background.

He scoffs, leaning in. "The problem is,," 

He does that, for the first time in ages. He holds your chin to face him, like he used to do, back then. Now there's different emotions mixed in, with all the lust.

Love. 

"If I kissed you, now and here, I'd not be able to stop. Don't fucking expect me to."

And there, his lips fall on yours, like a missing puzzle, skin hot against each other as he eventually picks you up in the process, and puts you down, towering over once again.

The gates of hell opened once more, as he pressed open mouthed kisses next to the v-line of your body-con, on the tattoo.

He wanted your body, pressed up against his heart.  Your hands, spreading his thoughts. Gripping your love, hope and desires, cupping them with nothing but passion. Fire. You felt his soul breathing heavily against your collarbones. You felt him nibble all the un uttered thoughts onto your ears. His hopes, naked on your skin. You needed each other. In a way unexplainable for eternities to come.

𓂁 ☼♒︎ moodboard 𓇼 MILES FROM HOME 𓇼 lıllılı.ıllı.ılılıı tides— blacktop ver.

images, pinterest teaser, here note, this is how i visualize the entire setting, you could picture it in any way though— also couldn't find much of the 'Jeju' vibes i wanted to. love diaries music rec,

add yourself to my taglist with the link below !

[the ones who have already responded through the comments in this post need not fill out this form again! y'all have been added <3]

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. . . . 'Cause people believe that they're gonna get away for the summer . . . .

𓇼 ˚𓆝 ⋆｡𓆟 ⋆｡𓆞˚ 𓇼

⎙ He was the still wave among the chaotic ripping tides— one that anchored youduring that unforgettable visit to your grandma's beach house— now on the verge of being sold.

Loaded with the responsibilities and emotions of spending the last week in Jeju, — will the new relationships and memories turn into something more, or will they just turn into bittersweet echoes of that one summer miles away from home.

𓇼 ˚𓆝 ⋆｡𓆟 ⋆｡𓆞˚ 𓇼

pairing, surfer!jungkook x f!reader tags/warnings, reader has had strict parents and this is her first time experiencing something alone— fully under her control, he is a surfer and owns a little shop for tourists who wants to explore the beach, a whole summer-beach house-fling kind of setting, fluff, smut, angst— the unavoidable trifecta, the characters do have some base-level lore too, longfic [series] note, this is the ultimate result of me listening to like a set of 4 songs ON REPEAT like it was a necessity, linking a playlist soon below, this is going to come out only on may but i couldn't wait to share a snippet of this scene i was working on literally at 2 am in the morning because i couldn't sleep. yeah call me productive. moodboard

love diaries music rec,

𓇼 ˚𓆝 ⋆｡𓆟 ⋆｡𓆞˚ 𓇼

teaser wc: 482

The waves ripple, gently caressing your bare feet, like a timid reminder about what you’re about to get yourself into on a random Saturday morning.

It does not feel all that haphazard though— seeing Jungkook knelt down in front, waxing the surfboard— the coconutty whiff of its scent soothes your senses for at least a moment before going full-on panic mode again.

“I don’t think today’s weather’s the best one for surfing, Matty you agree right?” you caress Matilda’s velvety muzzle as she barked in glee, jumping around the sand.

“She fully disagrees, c’mere” He looks up from the board, patting his upper thigh as you tilt your head in confusion.

“You need some feet gear, I’ll help.” He casually offers as if this happened on a daily— the way it rolled off his tongue so easily as he ran a hand behind his suit to dust it off of extra sand.

Nothing about this situation was routinely.

It was astounding how, in this very beach your grandma once adored so much, you were about to take leaps of faith and courage, experiencing completely new things way out of your comfort zone.

Jungkook crouches down, palms holding your bare feet now about to be clad in literal surfing gear, as he helps you into them with practiced ease.

“All set?” He comes up, a light smile spread across his face, taking a double look at your figure wrapped in the wetsuit rented from his own small beachside shop.

“Yeah, I’m literally about to set records— just me and my little surfboard.” Even the tiniest attempts to lighten the knot in your stomach and breath caught too hard in the middle of your throat, were in vain.

“Sure, set as many as you want, but I’ll deserve partial credit.” He catches a hold of your shoulder, maneuvering towards the board.

“What if I say you get full credit? Can I go back home? Matty might be hungry.” You fret in his arms, but he holds you still.

“Woah what happened to the bravery from minutes ago?” Jungkook’s hands come round your waist and all that you feel are the points of contact between your skin even through the thick material of the suits. He anchors you forth, steadying the surfboard under your feet.

“I’ve given you enough dryland training and you said you swim? You’re fine, __.” 

“But Matty-”

“She’s with Tae, I’m here with you. Let’s go?” Those words did calm you down more than you’d admit.

The humidity gets to your face quickly, gathering up a bright sheen on your skin.

No, you’re not sweating, obviously not.

It definitely has nothing to do with the vast expanse of waters laying free, welcoming you in with a warning. Fear. 

The initial inhibition was gnawing at your insides.

However, you feel his secure stance behind, and that was finally convincing enough for you to take the next step.

“I’m ready, Jungkook.”

𓇼 ˚𓆝 ⋆｡𓆟 ⋆｡𓆞˚ 𓇼

please visit this post to be a part of my taglist! lots of love <33

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thank youuu !!! muah 🍬

NIN's NUANCES 🍪 FIC : BACK TO YOU

spoilers ahead ! read here before scrolling further !

“Says the one who’s owning that little wooden chair with his name on it like a throne.” — OC

“Too bad, I do own my name. My own name. It’s my only throne.” — Jungkook

note : here, i wanted to bring in an imagery of how Jungkook build his life set on a stone of pure passion, while he sort of hints at how OC is solely living based off of the name her family has upheld since generations.

____

Forget the back and forth and fall face first into the waters from a height to test your limits, when all you loved and have ever experienced was a cozy, elevating and classy cold plunge. — OC's inner monologue

note: i tried to bring in her conflicting feelings about the encounter with Jungkook and the normal (sort of monotonous) experiences she's used to.

____

the strawberry shortcake

note: it's a kind of inner joke (?) not a joke cuz poor kook gets offended on how she had picked on that ONE part of their earlier conversation and how she understood his weakness aka SEOM (and bandmates) and played accordingly. i wanted to portray her selfishness there.

but, he still finds a way to use it on her.

and that, is Jungkook here. he knows how to bring a situation to his own advantage and stand up for himself.

____

“You played it for me, Jungkook.”

“What?”

“Thank you.”

note: as mentioned, Jungkook is just PURELY absolutely proud of his band, UNTIL he understands that OC knows about the deal with her dad, after which he just succumbs basically lmao.

however, i wanted to highlight that's not the ONLY reason he agreed.

he has never been thanked. it was always relentless work, and as much as it's a simple word, i personally think it goes a long way for someone who has worked AS hard as him in this story.

____

the one month deal

js a mask for these idiots who are down bad.

____

the man-bun

lemme js say, i found it hot. periodt.

apart from that, i wanted to show how she kind of domesticated (?) the whole situation (accidentally) which kinda made his soft strings snap (which he regrets as quickly too.)

Jungkook plops down on the couch, hands slowly untying the man bun that knotted his hair tightly, ruffling the now free curls, raking his palms slowly through them.

this is where Jungkook realises he mistook her actions.

____

end note : ik most of these things are quite obvious and could be picked up, but i was bored and you can also consider this as my favorite parts of back to you hehehe

if there's anything else you'd like to ask feel free to do so, or comment ! mwah

<3

if anyone’s wondering what post of oc’s made him get so riled up(?)

fic : back to you

timeline : post before she left for the trip that made things messier between them

idk why i'm aching to post back to you, but the amount of times i revisit and edit it is insane.

tell me why it went from 6.4k -> 6.7k???????

'back to you' coming on Wednesday 16/04 — 10 pm EST !

ONCE AGAIN UNDER THE MISTLETOE ⋆ 전정국

𓂃˖ ࣪⊹ in which . . prince!jk and princess!oc are gifted with a deluge of adversities. in what was expected to be a day of joy, will they find happiness again? the one that was lost in a mirage a year ago?

words, 2.3k filter, @ lovelogs on polarr,, thank you! love diaries, music rec for once again under the mistletoe — "happiness is a butterfly" — lana del ray [specifically for the last part], "i love you" — billie eilish

────୨ৎ────

Winter came anew, snow spread all over like a soft white blanket, a few pellets here and there. You walked out of the palace, draped in layers of clothing which wrapped warmth around, as you walked  down the imperial staircase decorated royally with different kinds of fairy lighting and small baubles stuck onto the handrail.  Elegant and festive air engulfed the palace atmosphere. As you waltz  to the extravagant Jeonju palace hall, you see workers hurrying, walking hither-thither in order to get the big Christmas tree decorated. Like the friendly woman you are, you greet each one of them as they serve a bow to you. A slow smile lines on your lips while you make your way to the door and out into the palace garden covered in layers of snow. 

The kingdom of Jeonju preparing for Christmas is arduous. 

They say, all princesses are happy, for they have everything they want. No struggles and zero distress. But a princess, beyond the shimmery crown, harbors a soul.. Breathes the same air as everyone irrespectively.

Your life was complete, in the eyes of a commoner. Jewelry, innumerable dresses, people to cater to basic needs, everything. 

You were surely grateful, but a constant void colored in the outlines of your mind, enhancing its emptiness.

The scent of winter was apparent, air turned more frigid as you clutched the clothes draped around you, pressing them more onto your skin as a shield, before sitting down on the bench amidst the green and white expanse of the palace garden.

Numerous thoughts smoothly slide into your mind watching the snow decorate the bushes and trees. Sparing a soft glance at your left hand, your other hand slightly caresses the shining diamond ring encircling the ring finger. 

A promise ring. Defining your love for one another, signifying that your heart belongs to him and only him. Jeon Jungkook. He is the only man you have in your heart and secure your love for. 

Jeonju’s deemed enemy, the prince of Busan.

[ Previous Christmas : A year ago ]

Tip-toeing through the silent hallway of your palace at night with only minutes left for the clock to strike twelve was— peculiar. Especially for a Princess who was forbidden to step foot out of the palace without umpteen bodyguards clearing her way. 

You were always kept away even  from normal experiences. No public interactions, no relationships to cherish, nothing.

Just because your dad, the King of Jeonju, feared his rivals, he kept you indoors shut out from all danger. 

Standing to a side, finding space behind the statue of some revered ancestor, your breaths fogged up the smoothly maintained bronze surface of the rigid man’s metal torso— the cold air dominating.

You look around, silently scrambling to the nearest exit in a flash.

Save?

The jolly air of the palace backyard facing the town hit so vividly, the Christmas cheer already highlighting each of the houses— which were only miniature structures visible from your current position.

The previous day, you heard the maidens in the palace talking about a Christmas ball that was being held in the kingdom of Busan. Yes, you knew they were cut-throat enemies of Jeonju. But, you cared less, and decided to take part in it. 

Discreetly.

It was a task, really, but convincing Soojin— your personal handmaiden— to lend you one of her unused dresses and accessories was quite easy. 

Step 1, check.

Now you stand near the stables, whistling to Ira, your best friend, partner in crime.

Ira gallops in glee, however you could sense the tired whine she lets out the moment you feed her— boosting up energy for the adventurous night ahead— the way to Busan, now your red carpet to freedom.

___

Slowly walking through the wide hall— where several people were huddled up enjoying their time with their dance partners as a melodious Christmas tune was being enunciated by the royal band—you smiled heartily after a long time seeing everyone forget war and crime, just dancing to their heart’s content.

Soon, you were pulled further into the crowd softly, and looking up, you found a pair of very familiar doe eyes boring into yours. 

“I knew you'd come.” He whispered, leaning towards your ear, hearing his voice after the longest time sent shivers down your spine. You’ve been close to only one person in your whole life, and he is the one who stood before you, hands circling around your waist, holding you against him.

Before the Kingdoms got into war, you both were best friends. He was a necessity like morning coffee, unwavering partner in most childhood shenanigans— and maybe just maybe, yours.

Both of you knew, for lifetime, that you're meant to be eachothers'. It wasn't required to be put in long words,

You just knew.

In fact, Busan and Jeonju weren’t enemies until the war that wreaked havoc all around the place. From then, you never got to meet him.

The kingdoms separated, cutting all ties, and even imposing regulations on citizens. 

Never did you think that he’ll remember you after all that happened.

You took the biggest risk, now standing in a ballroom where thousands of people could see and recognize your presence.

However, his hold on you only tightened.

“I thought you wouldn’t remember me.” You let out shakily, overwhelmed with all the emotions striking through your being. 

He swayed your bodies side to side rhythmically, his mouth still near your ear. 

“I can’t afford to forget my princess.” Still dancing to the music, a tear rolled down your eye, head rested upon his shoulder ever so gently. And that small action showed how you missed and longed for him, the only person that gave you love.

“Loving your dress choice for the night, angel.” He chuckles, looking down at the faded material of your clothing. Running a hand through the lace that graced the neckline, his hands rest back on your waist, never ceasing to follow the mellow slow dance.

“You’re making fun of me, when I came such a long way to meet you. Talk about being a man.” Your eyes almost meet the back of your head, rolling them in mock anger, as he connects your foreheads with a breathy laughter rumbling through his chest.

You feel it.

Your hands on his chest, you feel the happiness.

The warmth you were never sure of, until now.

He carefully lets you step on his long pointed shoes— finely polished into shiny black— as your gloved palms find home on his shoulders.

And what you were unaware of, was his sneaky intention.

You looked up, to see the both of you standing near the grand Christmas tree, small branches of mistletoe hanging above your heads. Gaze fixed on Jungkook’s doe eyes, he whispered “I’ve been waiting for this moment for years, princess. Let me-“

“PRINCE JUNGKOOK !!” A deep yell echoed throughout the hall as everyone flinched and gasped, Jungkook detached himself from your figure, knowing the source of that authoritative voice. The music halted midway and now, all eyes were on the both of you.

The King of Busan, threw a sharp glare at you, as you bowed to him, eyes darting around the empty ground. “What are you doing with her? She’s our enemy’s daughter, the Princess of Jeonju. And you, who let you step into our palace?”

“I told her to come” Jungkook stood in front of you defensively. 

“May you enlighten me on who gave you the right to decide, when I’m well and alive?” He asked Jungkook, tension crackling between their gaze.

“I love her, dad. I want her to be my Princess.”

You were absolutely stunned at his confession. He did not say “Princess of Busan”. No titles. Just his.

“JUNGKOOK, HOW DARE YOU TALK BACK TO ME?” The King raised his voice, outraged at his son’s audacity.

“I want to make my own decisions,-” He was about to go on, but you noticed The King was at his absolute limit of tolerance. You had to intervene. 

“Jungkook please. You can’t talk back to your father.” 

“YOU, you are the reason he talked back to me, his father. I will not spare you and your kingdom. Guards ! I want her out. This instant.” The King ordered as your eyes widened in terror. This news will surely reach your Kingdom and much worse— your father.

And that shouldn’t happen no matter what. 

Like he read your thoughts, Jungkook held his hand up, gesturing the guards to stop moving further.

“I’ll leave.” He simply stated, your whole body shook in terror, slowly holding his shoulder with your right hand.

“Why” A small shaky whisper left your lips. He turned towards you, smiling. 

“Princess, I promise to come back to you. If I don’t leave now, you will be in great trouble, I don’t want that to happen. You deserve a lot more in life.” 

“Out. Now.” His dad said nonchalantly, as you watched Jungkook slip through the swarm of people, their mouths agape in stupefaction as murmurs filled the air.

Who never thought this Christmas night would be so eventful. 

Breaking down into heavy sobs, tears glistened in a cascade through your skin.

He sacrificed everything he had for you.

Not wasting any more time, you bolted out of palace and from the Kingdom of Busan. 

Ira was in no state to carry you any further, her growing neighs filled with complaint reaching your ears.

What did that poor animal do anyways.

You sigh and hop down, patting her soft body, calming her down and perching on a bench in the outskirts of the Kingdom, the dim streetlights casting a glow over.

Almost instantly, a piece of parchment slipped out of Ira’s side pocket, and caught your attention.

Opening it, you found a few words scribbled on it :

Would I ever be able to visit you in that dream Where you and I are eternal  Not a goodbye, but a faint quest I leave, for answers I promise to come back  With my healing wounds, I had left in my heart for eternity  I’m still with you Darkness of the waves in me will be long gone by then You're my everything, words can't describe your soul Our Heart strings  still embracing each other  I’m never letting go  Never in a million years  기대해줘 (wait for me) ~ yours, jeongguk.

A ring slips out of the envelope, and onto the ground, clattering in the loud silence of the surroundings, as Ira stirs from the sides, alerting your attention.

quietly taking it from the sandy pathway, you dust it and put it on.

You don’t cry.

Just longingly stare at the ragged piece of paper.

[ Present Time : 25th December ]

'Tis the season to be jolly', they say.

Not for the Princess of Busan.

The title felt heavy on your shoulders, each time your entire family brings up the happenings of a year ago.

You never celebrated Christmas with joy after the incident.

Instead, you simply used to walk around Jeonju and watch everyone spend their time with loved ones just to put your heart at ease. 

And that’s exactly what you were doing right now. 

Walking around the street, disguised in Soojin’s dress (yet again), watching people shop for gifts, some out in front of their houses decorating the trees, the endearing giggles of  the children who laughed and played around filling up in the air. 

As you continued the stroll, you stumbled upon a small hall from which low chattering erupted. 

Stopping near its door you peered in, careful not to get noticed by anyone inside. But suddenly a group of girls pushed their way in, taking you along with them, accidentally inwards. 

The whole place was decorated minimally but it looked pretty.

Christmas cheer everywhere, it’s the first time you felt festive. The whole aura of the place just fit the season. 

A medium sized tree perched on the floor and vines of mistletoe on and around the tree. 

Busy admiring the place, you felt a small tug at the hem of Soojin’s hand away dress that adorned your body— one that aided you in this disguise.

Looking down, a tiny girl smiled widely at you.

Gently crouching down to meet her eyes, you asked her ;

“Hey baby, what’s your name?” 

“I’m Mina ! You look like a princess ! I want you to dance with my Koo!” She exclaimed as your eyebrows crashed in confusion.

“Who is Koo, Mina?” In response to your query, she pointed towards a tall man, back turned to the both of you as he talked away with other men around him.

“He’s my Prince ! And I want a Princess to love him, a princess who’s as kind and caring just like the one in the story Koo tells me everyday!” She sounded so excited to introduce you to him, and pulled you towards the man.

“Koo ! Mina found a Princess for you, now dance with the others, it’s Christmas, come on.” She nudged his arm and the moment your eyes met with his, the world seemed to stop.

The same doe eyes that carried your galaxy.

“Princess?” He was surprised to see you there.

Mina immediately put your hands into his, the comfort of them which you felt after an eternity, had a lasting effect. 

She pushed you towards the crowd, déjà vu rushing in at the whole setting— Christmas day and the dance— taking you back to the last one almost instantly.

A million questions in your mind, he pulled you closer once again, but this time the hold was more firm and confident. 

Like he’ll never doubt it. 

Like he never did.

You couldn’t help but let out tears, drowning into his eyes as the music played in the background, the mistletoe above your heads once again.

“Princess, look up” You followed his words and looked up only to find the mistletoe right above your heads again. 

“Seems like they're determined to make us kiss.” You joked and he shook his head, resting his forehead on yours, you couldn’t get enough of his eyes, wanting to look at them forever.

“Aren’t you looking into my eyes a little too much? Makes me flustered, princess.”

“I don’t want to stay away from you anymore. Let me look at you, what if you’d disappear again? How did you end up here?” You asked, bodies still swaying slightly in accordance to the music.

Unsaid words, but you knew your hearts were situated tightly in eachother's iron grips.

“I wanted to see you all the time, didn’t want to give up, so I came here, worked many hours in this small shop to be independent, I don’t want a kingdom that banished me, anymore, when I have my world with me,”

He looks at you with adoration.

"Knowing you're somewhere around, here in Jeonju, that was all that I needed to keep moving forth. Remember my promise?"

You nod, fingers finding its way into the fabric of his ragged, grey overalls, gripping lightly. He notices the ring wrapped on your finger and caresses it, face splashed with surprise.

Intertwining his hand with your ring-clad ones, your bodies sway further under the mistletoe hanging above.

"Do you live here?" Your simple question makes him smile, hands pushing a few wispy strands of your hair to the side.

"Yes, this is my humble abode, Mina's parents own the shop I work in. I live alone, in their outhouse."

He looks at Mina, excitedly playing around with a few of her friends, running around the tree all ready to open the gifts— dancing in tiny moves, occasionally, to the joyous music.

Your eyes follow, and realize— watching his calm face shine brightly under the yellow lights reflecting through the room.

You're not ready to let go.

"I'm so proud of you, never thought I'd see you again." You feel his calloused hands caress you cheeks, thumb rubbing over the unnoticed beads of tears.

He pauses, turning to look at you in deep contemplation.

“I used to see you when you walked around the palace gardens. From afar.” 

“You could’ve approached me, oh, you don’t know how much I missed you, Jungkook.” You replied, slowly bringing your palm around his nape, bringing his face closer to rest your cherry lips on his.

Surprised by your bold move, he smiles into the kiss, sharing all the passion that he had through it, hands encircling your waist, arching you into him.

A feeling you both yearned for, lips on each other for the first time under the mistletoe, anew.

Once again under the mistletoe, this time it’s forever.

────୨ৎ────

uarmygguk. 2025.

je ne sais pas qui est ici

thinking of starting a series of little posts where i talk about certain details in my fics that i intended to add— wanna call it ‘nin’s nuances’ or something— food for thought 💭

shades of you ★ jjk

gguk's ficbook

brief: helping you from getting caught by the cops starring: roommate!jk x f!reader tags/warnings: mentions of graffiti art, reader is sort of a rebel (she's got reasons), jungkook is lowk sus note: clearing my drafts and blurbs before i venture further! tbh it's been long, tiring and exhausting in here— but i love writing too much to let go <3

A dark brown leather, but worn out jacket hung over your shoulders, slumping due to the weight of the bag full of potential tools you had in them, the night washed over the sky, a few dimly lit, flickering street lights were the only form of brightness in your life.

literally. 

Kicking and rolling the few stones that lay unattended on the floors of the walkway, your eyes slowly lift up from gazing at the rocks, and fix them on the few clean and ready to be done walls sprawled out, as if it is welcoming you.

Stopping on your tracks, the sound of the bag being practically thrown on the ground stinged your ears because of the metal bottles of spray paint in them. 

Yes, those were your tools of comfort, the very ones that help you decorate the walls with talent. Your uni didn’t necessarily invite you in for the innumerable art competitions, even if you wanted to, let’s just say because you weren’t very reputable around.

To unpack the happenings from the timeline of your transfer to the new uni from your hometown — from where you were terminated during a collective campaign you launched with a couple of friends against the corrupted management system— the natural looks of loathe you got in the new school wasn’t exactly unfathomable. 

It was inevitable, you knew you wouldn’t be accepted in the right way anymore.

Exactly why now, you stood here in the utmost dingiest part of the alley with the shadiest surroundings— it was the typical place that screamed “unsafe”, but you still felt nothing but pure bliss when you shook the spray can, the light tapping sound reverberating through the atmosphere which was devoid of noise except the occasional chirp of crickets, as your hands moved freely with the strokes that accentuated liberty through art.

Ironically enough, it was something you were deprived of, all your life while fighting for it. 

Getting yourself enrolled in college again was the last thing on your mind, resorting to certain small jobs, but you had the will to live and fight your way along, against injustice. That landed you where you currently pursued studies at, and with a few connections, you managed to find housing right next to college.

It wasn’t anything big— but could call it home. It soon became one for two, as your hunt for a roommate rested when ultimately, Jeon Jungkook, a timid freshman started lodging with you.

You’d usually walk into the house after college and see him sprawled on the sofa, reading. Then you’d get out for some fresh air into the balcony, and there he’d be being an ever know avid reader, again.

And like that, you just decided to keep yourself away from him, so that you wouldn’t become a scar to his peace; a blemish.

Occasional greetings and fleeting moments in the kitchen whenever the two of you grabbed morning cereal or late night snacks were common, but apart from that he was just a regular compsci major.

The one who you were intrigued by.

Your thoughts are occupied with him, while you brush on the wall with the spray paint. Mindlessly, your hands, merged with the rhythm of your mind, stroked “田柾國”  onto the surface of the wall.

You were a Korean culture enthusiast, and thus mastered Hanja, a traditional writing system that consists of Chinese characters. A small chuckle escaped and melted into the air, as you suddenly snapped out of the daze.

Painting was your only escape, but you weren’t one who frequently zoned out while working.

“Shit- Did I just write his name in Hanja..” You mumbled those words contradicting the look of pure amusement in your face.

As you were about to paint more graffiti onto the wall, a faint noise of a siren, possibly of the cop vans, echoed vividly, around the empty alley like an alarm, a warning.

Your ears perked and the thought of getting into trouble electrified your spine like it usually doesn't and pieces of fear pricked into your head wounding your previously soft thoughts.

If you get caught, you will definitely be expelled again. Been through it once, but this time it’s different with Jungkook involved.

You somehow grew attached, and don't want to cease being his one and only roommate.

A warm fuzzy feeling coursed through you.

Beep. Wrong timing.

You were in the middle of fucking running away from cops.

Get your shit together, ___.

Hurriedly, you carelessly stuffed the supplies into the backpack and rushed with folding up the ladder you stood in, putting it aside to clear off any traces of your presence. T

he sirens grew closer and closer as your breath hitched seeing the vans pull up, the headlights illuminating the streets.

This was it. You were about to get caught.

But just as the cops were surrounding the place where you beautifully painted the graffiti on, a pair of hands swiftly scooped you into the nothingness of the small walkway behind the walls and in no time, the person, whoever it was, connected their foreheads with yours, in an attempt to look like you both were just mere couples minding their own business.

A torch light glimmered through the alley and into the small pathway behind and immediately retracted.

Cops were out of sight, but still the man had himself attached to you, his hands tenderly gripping your waist in a ring, his breath fanning over your face.

You were slow to notice the flavor of mint Jungkook timidly asks you to buy whenever you go out—the one smell that makes your heart tumble in an approximately infinite number of somersaults—filling your senses.

“Jungkook?” You cautiously whispered, his face too close to yours to let you breathe. 

“You’re one little troublesome thing aren’t you?” Now that’s not the Jungkook you know. His voice seemed deeper than the galaxies his eyes held. 

“I was just doing what I like.” You shrugged off, just like you weren’t standing wide eyed with a racing heart.

“Same.” He whispered before holding your jaw and diving in, bringing back your lips in his as you were utterly shocked, but your senses kissed him back, with the same passion. He walked backwards, out into the street where the wall stood, his name in Hanja shone brighter than ever, in the moonlight.

Pulling out, he rested his forehead on yours again, but you walked off towards the broken switches that controlled the flimsy bulb that hung over on the most dark alleyway and turned them up, the lights going out as the both of you were illuminated with just the dim moonlight, which seemed to disappear into the clouds, as if they were sucked in its vortex.

“Who are you?”

A question for a question.

As the night entangles its beauty into the walls that lay bare in front of your vision, you watch the letters in hanja, your art piece slowly disappearing from sight.

drummer!jk is doing things to me as i write him (going feral) 😊

we need more drummer!jk as a society.

BACK TO YOU ⋆ JJK

TEASER ; brief.

˖ ࿐ two souls, one storm to weather—need.

the yearning to turn on the tip of pointed heels, with much urgency, and go back into the same cycle that once made the both of your timbers shiver. resolve crackle.

he, who never wished to serve whatever you craved on a platter.

you, who knew how to bring him back every single time.

back to you.

OUT NOW.

category : ONESHOT/ TWO-SHOT word count : 5k+ [edits yet to be made] starring : drummer!jk, trust fund baby!oc tags/warnings : smut. dry humping [more will be specified in the fic], reader and jungkook are emotionally very wrecked individuals— oc more [lmao she's kind of an ass, but he's not any better], not quite friends with benefits (basically js benefits), oc is a rich spoilt brat who thinks she has the world at her feet. kook's in a band— jimin and hyunjin cameo. it's my drummer!jk fantasies that led to this. so he's a walking warning.

snippet wc : 164

You briefly look around the dingy room with dim lights and concrete walls, unpainted— fit to be a green room.

Fairly enough, it was an embarrassing accident you wouldn’t admit. The yacht was genuinely too sophisticated and you lost your way to the ladies’ room.

Coincidentally enough, you hear your favorite song being played live on the drums from a nearby room titled “Staff Only.” No one could stop you from entering anywhere around on the yacht your dad booked for the big day. 21st birthday bash. And you knew you had everyone wrapped around a pinky.

With him, though? You don’t know.

Don’t know why a look at his face, seconds ago screamed “Not today.” 

His smirk yelling at your senses to keep your power to yourself.

And his unfiltered comment at the beginning? Perfect starter. 

You, nonetheless, took pride in your ability to bring what you craved for, at your fucking feet. Only, this one would take a lot more solo effort.

Consider it done because— goddamn was he a man. Sleeveless tank-top hugging his miniature waist ever so tightly, projecting whatever toned muscle that hid beneath, tattoos twirling around his left arm.

Main course coming right up.

way back home ★ jjk

brief, cuddling on a rainy night starring, CEO!jungkook (baby daddy!jk 😓) x f!reader tags/warnings, none! just some corny lines cuz even though he's a CEO kook's cheesy like that, also korean euphemism reference (iykyk ;)

love diaries music rec, still with you— jungkook

A cold Tuesday night, the streetlights highlighting the sheets of rain sweeping sideways, the slow breeze along with the soft downpour overall — a perfect night to recollect, relax and reflect. You stood in the kitchen of the penthouse, stirring up and preparing hot shin ramen, simultaneously warming up some milk, as the rain continued to go “pitter-patter” outside. Your glance occasionally shifted to the glass window where the raindrops were sticking on, enjoying every bit of the night, as the sound of rain reverberated through the kitchen, Seoul city spanning out right in front of your eyes with new doors to happiness opening everyday.

A small fist grabbed the hem of your tee and tugged on it to grab your attention, making you look down, only to find your toddler, Mia looking up at you with her doe eyes that held a questioning look—  one that she purely inherited from her father, Jungkook. Her cherubic smile melted your senses as you scooped her up,  along with the cookie plushie she tightly clutched onto.

“Mia, didn’t mommy tell you to play with cookie while she brings milk for you?” You lightly tap the plushy clad in her tiny fists, as she defensively brings cookie closer to her little face, eyes slightly curved and lips already in a small pout, soon parted to form words.

“Dada, me wanna see” She barely made a sentence, but the longing in her sweet voice was enough for you to realize that she had been missing her best friend,  her dad. Jungkook was the best dad to Mia, you love the way his eyes turn into goo when he holds her close, the way the both of them bond. He was off to work for a week now, in another town. He’d never miss a chance to come on FaceTime with you, and Mia pops in, giggling and her attempts to speak were just too cute to resist. She'd host a full fledged puppet show with cookie and her other plushies, occasionally jumping on the couches and chairs, making you sprint along as Jungkook watches the shenanigans a screen away.

But those wouldn't compensate for the feeling of having him close, feeling his warmth around you, and the rainy night caused these feelings to grow rapidly. 

Definitely missing him.

“Dada will come tomorrow, okay? Now my baby can have her milk !” You lit her mood up as she lightly clapped her tender hands. Putting her down gently, you started filling her small bottle with milk, but just then, the doorbell rang as Mia ran towards it hoping that it’d be her dad with you following behind.

Clicking the door open, the familiar scent of forment cologne caught you off-guard, only to meet your beloved husband’s heart eyes that bored into yours.

“Jungkook ! You’re back !” Forgetting everything else, your arms flung around his well-built body, his hands encircling your waist in return. Mia started jumping in tiny, wanting to be in her father’s embrace too. Noticing her little movements, he immediately picked her up and peppered her face with small kisses, making you look at them in awe.

“I missed you both, couldn’t wait to finish everything and come back to my lovely wife and dada’s girl.” He pecked your lips and collected his baggage before going inside with you and Mia.

“Why aren’t you saying anything, love?” He set aside his suitcase and you helped him remove his coat.

“I’m just too stunned to speak honestly- You didn’t tell me that you were coming today ! I could’ve prepared something special for you.” You made a not-so-satisfied face as Jungkook laughed  it away, easing your frown with his free hand.

“It wouldn’t be a surprise if I told you.” He winked, making you roll your eyes in mock annoyance. That’s when Mia started tapping Jungkook’s cheeks, still in his arms.

“Yes yes baby? What happened?” His attention shifted completely to her, as she yawned, her doe eyes getting droopy.

“Mia wants to sleep, I see. C’mon, let’s rest together.” Patting her back, he was about to walk away with her when you stopped him.

“Koo, you can go and freshen up. I’ll put her to bed.” 

However, he stood still, Mia now fast asleep in her dad’s arms.

“Jungkook? Go take a shower.”

“No fun in showering alone. I’m too lazy. Someone up to help me?” He raised a brow in mischief.

You knew where this was going.

“I’d much rather help my baby sleep.”  You laughed at his shocked expression as you took Mia from him and walked towards the bedroom, him giving up and retreating to the restroom to indulge in a relaxing hot shower, as the rain showed no sign of ceasing for the night, much to his delight..

time skip;

Jungkook eased his muscles, a hot shower on a cold rainy night was pure bliss. He walked out of the washroom drying his soft locks when his eyes landed upon Mia’s sleeping figure. She laid down on the soft mattress, legs tangled together cuddling the very plushie he once gifted her on her first birthday.

You rushed into the room scrubbing your lightly wet hands against the apron wrapped around your figure, looking like you just came from work to check on Mia.

“Hey, cherry” Jungkook walked to you and wrapped you in his hold as you tried to wiggle out to check on the dish cooking up back in the kitchen so that it wouldn’t burn.

“Koo, I gotta make something for you, not now.”

However the “cherry” did something to you, as remnants of your times back in school where it all started, came back in a cascade of memories. A friendship that planted its seed back when the both of you were literal children, morphed into something even more beautiful, but nothing changes no matter the distance or time. He’ll always be your best friend, your partner in every step of life.

“I’d love anything you make, even if it’s just some ramen.” His grip tightened, making you stop your attempts to get away.

“That’s cap, now don’t be stubborn, Jeon.” You scolded but he lifted you up in his hold, your feet now on top of his, moving  behind the divider curtains so that your baby wouldn’t be disturbed amidst the somewhat get-together her parents are having.

“You smell so good, baby” He whispers into your neck, eyes closed.

“I think I smell like ramen and milk powder, for sure.” You swat his shoulder, bringing him close as he hums into your chest, now, placing featherlight kisses all over it and right at the centre of the J necklace that wrapped around your neck.

“Nope, you smell like what’s mine.”

You were about to snort at his corny reply, but his following  response tightens your heart strings.

“You’re doing great. Thank you for holding our family together.”

He leans down, placing his tender lips on yours, foreheads resting against each other as his hands rub your waist over the apron, drawing you even closer, as if it’s possible. 

Just then, you heard a soft sniffle, realizing that Mia woke up, you went over, and took her in your motherly embrace, cooing sweet nothings to calm her down. Meanwhile, Jungkook walked up to your duo and placed himself on the bed, resting his back on the headboard, and gestured to you to go to him.

You had Mia in your arms, his embrace immediately wrapping around the both of you as the rain continued outside, the clock ticked to the time, 9.30 pm. Mia was already fed, since you prefer to put her to bed early. Feeling soft pecks landing on your forehead time to time, you asked Jungkook 

"How was work there? Are you good?" Your eyes went to Mia’s peaceful face as she succumbed to sleep yet again.

He hummed with a sweet smile before opening his relaxed eyes. 

"I did well, but couldn't wait to come back home. But I've left off all the work for a week from today." He said, looking at your confused self.

"But weren't you the one who wouldn't spend time with us until all your work is complete? What's up now?" You whispered making sure not to wake Mia up.

"I thought about it, love.. I'll never have this best version of me if I'm away from the both of you. Now I'm gonna slow everything down and build our family, putting you first before anything." Tears welled up in your hazel eyes, how committed he was about your family. Definitely lucky to have him as your husband. 

"Hey, love, don't cry. I don't like to see you like this." Contradictory to those words, his tummy rumbled making him gasp and smile bashfully, elevating the emotionally charged surroundings.

“Oh god, see you’re hungry. I told you to eat before anything else, didn’t I? C’mon, I’ll make you some ramen.” You put Mia on the mattress, placing a few pillows near her just in case she tosses and turns. 

Taking out two cups of ramen, you fetched the already boiled water, mixed it with the noodles, and added the contents of the flavor packet that came with it into the paper cup. Jungkook wrapped his arms around you warmly, watching you cook up his meal.

“There you go. Eat well, I made it with love, you know.” You joked making him chuckle and dig into it scrunching his face at how good it tasted.

You couldn’t help but boop his nose, as he continued to slurp on the spicy goodness.

“You not eatin’?” He asked with a full mouth, barely making a coherent sentence.

“It’s 10pm. I already ate, baby.”

He seemed satisfied with your reply, immediately asking you for a side of kimchi to go with the last bits of noodles left.

___

[After dinner; 11:01 pm]

Intertwining his hands with yours, he walked you to the balcony, facing the rain which never seemed to end. Standing behind you, his arms around your figure, watching the rain was his little happiness. He yearned almost everyday to just feel you with him when he was away, but since the moment is here, he wanted to cherish every second.

“Lord, why’s the weather so moody? You know, I love the way the rain makes the brown soil seem richer and earthier than they are otherwise. It’s like it makes the things around us more pronounced and seen.” You muse into his ears, hands now resting on his tatted ones around your waist.

“Just like how I feel when I’m with you.” He added to your description, a crimson shade splashing on your bashful visage.

“You’re too cheesy today, what’s in the air huh?” You tapped his cheeks lightly.

“Hmm, I wanted to ask you something, though.” His eyes half closed, lax, almost as if he’s feeling the surroundings.

“Yes?” You waited for a response as he turned you around to face him directly in the eyes.

“Wanna have more ramen with me before bed?”

💐 EXBF!JUNGKOOK HEADCANNONS

REQUEST: “i was thinking like you guys are still somewhat friends after the breakup (maybe in the same friend group or smt) and he’s still very much in love with you type thing ykk 🤭”

warnings: exboyfriend!jungkook x exgirlfriend!reader. clingy ex. he’s still MADLY in love. he’s kinda annoying but we love him. slightly fwb (?). same friend group. friends post-breakup.

lulu speaks: hi i LOVE this trope so im very happy u (beautiful anon) requested this. hope this makes u happy 😚

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who still calls you ‘baby.’ doesn’t even blink when someone goes, “didn’t you guys break up like 6 months ago?” “so what? she’s still my baby.”

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who sits next to you in every setting imaginable. restaurants, movies, bars, car rides, booths at dinner. he will physically move people to be able to sit next to you. “scoot” has single-handedly become the most used word in his vocabulary.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who replies to ALL of your texts in your groupchat. replies with hearts, texts of his own (that no one asked for), or by saying something like “this was funny hahaha take me back pls🙏🏼”

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who is a hugger. OH, HE’S A HUGGER, ALRIGHT. everytime you meet up, everytime you leave, he clings on like he’s a koala with trust issues. full-on arms around your waist, chin on your shoulder type of hug. he sighs and smiles like he belongs there.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who will turn to you, casual stare, lips puckered at you like he’s just expecting a kiss. you shove him off, rolling your eyes and hiding the beginnings of a smile.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who brings you flowers every time he comes over. even if it’s a group hangout at your place, if he showed up unannounced, or if you called him because you were crying or lonely. wax paper-wrapped bouquet hand-picked by some florist who was under the impression that he was picking that up for his girlfriend.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who remembers everything about you. everything. the cologne he wore that you always complimented, your favorite movie, color, food, songs, all of it.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who will drop everything if you ask. he’ll literally leave work early if you text him you’re not having a good day. you call him at 2AM? he’s out of bed and starting his ignition right then and there.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who is so annoying when your friend group goes out to eat. he plops himself down in the seat next to you without asking. he slides his drink towards you to try first. tells the waiter when they got something wrong with your order before you even have the chance to do it first.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who still has you saved in his contacts as “wifey 🤍”. you broke up 6 months ago.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook whose friends go “give it a rest, bro.” to which he replies, “what? we’re friends 😊” while literally staring at you like you harnessed the moon from the sky.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who shows off when you’re around. he flexes his arms with his tongue poking at his cheek, wiggling his eyebrows like he knows you’re secretly ogling.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who texts you the literal minute after you leave the hangout. “you get home safe?” “miss you” “had fun. u looked beautiful as always”

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who still drinks out of your cup, borrows your lip balm, offering you a bite of his food and taking one right where you just bit.

ᰔ exboyfriend!jungkook who steals and wears your hair ties around his wrist everytime he comes over.

lulu speaks pt2: thank u anon!! he’s soo annoyinggggg omggggg 😘🥰😛 stawp he’s weirddd☺️😘🥰🥰ughhh you just can’t shake him offff🤪🤪😝🥰🤪😍😜😘😛

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🫟 SCENEKID!JUNGKOOK HEADCANNONS

warnings: himbo energy. likely a very innacurate depiction of scene kids. set somewhere between 2007-2012. he’s kind of a loser. in a hot good way.

lulu speaks: I LOVE HIM SO BAD YOU DONT UNDERSTAND.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who walks into class late everyday, blasting asking alexandria loud enough that you can hear it clearly through his headphones.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who hangs out in the back of spencer’s with his friends and points out every inappropriate item like he’s so brave.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who doesn’t flirt. he just zones out and stares at you with his chin propped up in his hand like an actual idiot.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who uses corny typing quirks like mixing capital letters with lowercase letters in a sentence that ABSOLUTELY does not need to be as dramatic as he makes sound.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who buys EXCLUSIVELY fruit flavored vapes. no exceptions. except maybe a cotton candy one if he’s feeling expiremental.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who is probably the biggest gyopo you’ll ever encounter in your life.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who sits at the back of the cafeteria with his friends, eating some red 40-filled bullshit while trying (and failing) to gawk at you without garnering their attention.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who has a gif of zim and gir kissing in the corner of his myspace page.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who posts grainy, horrible quality pictures of himself baring his teeth and captioning it with soemthing corny like, “TEEF >:3”

✶ scenekid!jungkook who wears his green-striped zip up hoodie and tight black skinny jeans to the mall, sipping on a coke while giggling like a 10 year old about the “i ♥︎ boobies” bracelet in zumiez. he then buys it and does a shit job at hiding it from his mom.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who gets detention for blowing a suspicious, sweetly scented white cloud from his mouth behind his textbook, which was propped up to conveniently hide his whole face from his teacher. yes, it was his watermelon pen. he calls it “a free air freshener”. the school calls it a safety hazard.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who has a real lip ring, but says it’s fake around his mom (she still has no clue he got it done).

✶ scenekid!jungkook who poses for pictures by pouting and mimicking a fake tear by dragging his finger down his face.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who has NO type. scene girl? he’s down bad. emo girl? would die for her. goth girl? oh, he’s barking. popular girl? foaming at the mouth. he just loves women. period.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who gives the jocks and preppy guys death stares when he’s walking down the hallway. he’s silent with his hatred, but NOT subtle. not in the slightest.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who always keeps his ipod clipped on his hoodie pocket.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who sharpie tattoos himself all over. any skin that’s not clothed is getting covered in tiny, senseless doodles. his mom tells him he’ll get ink poisoning. he rolls his eyes when he scrubs it off.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who once got called “kinda hot in a weird way” by a popular girl. he got hard.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who would go on a multiple hour-long tangent about monster flavors if you’d let him. and BOY does he want to.

✶ scenekid!jungkook who accidentally walks into walls, doors, and windows because he’s too busy flipping through the songs on his playlist to find one that matches his exact mood.

lulu speaks pt2: SAW THIS BOY AT THE MALL LAST WEEK, GOT THE KIND OF LOOK TO MAKE ME FREAK . THAT LONG ASS HAIR WITH THE TIGHTEST JEANS, MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE ON HIS TEE. HE LOOKED SO SICK LIKE HE WAS DYING, IF I SAID HE WASN’T HOT THEN I’D BE LYING. PLEASE, HANDSOME, DONT BE COY, COME ON, FUCK ME, EMO BOY 🗣️🗣️🗣️

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habits of a clandestine nature | jjk

pairing: collegejk x female oc (angst, smut)

warnings: college!jk, rich!jk, he's a college nepo baby!!!, waitress!oc, flashbacks to summer, (mild) enemies to lovers, oc lives with tae (they're besties), jk is besties with jimin, mentions of parents infidelity, mentions of oc's virginity (lost prior to the story starting), a little angsty, jk is nawt a fuckboi, but he is stewpid, unprotected sex, bathroom escapades, multiple positions, oral (f), mentions of blowjobs, house parties, jackson wang!!!!!!!, yoongi has no lines but is also one of my fave characters lmao

wordcount: 16k

note from holly: this was written as a commission over on ko-fi!! it went through soooo many changes and edits - at one point it was over 24k lmao. i have so much lore and backstory for this couple, but I'll save it for a rainy day!! one of the main prompts was the 2004 classic a cinderella story, and there are little nods to it throughout the story, including the diner name!! a commenter on wattpad said the pairing reminded them of danny and sandy from grease and like... i see it lmao. anywaysss enjoy!! <33

minors dni // cross posted to wattpad

It's a well-trained habit, your fleeting glance towards the door of Montgomery's Diner when the bell rings.

Though the clatter of cheap porcelain being stacked on a tray almost manages to drown out the chiming metal, it's never quite enough. Softening your hardened expression, you continue on with your work, careful to not let your contempt show too much.

You already know who it is—or at least, who it could be. Only saw the girl leading the pack, but know that where Claudia goes, the rest of The Untouchables will surely follow.

Gorgeous in a way that money can't buy, and careless in a way that money makes up for, she's never taken personal issue with you. Barely even registers your existence.

From your quick look, you know that it's not just the girls today. It's the guys, too.

All with parents on the college board, they're regarded as campus royalty. Are aptly known as The Untouchables, 'cause the rules that apply to you don't apply to them. They'll likely continue with their lives in a similar manner for years to come, and will pass these attributes off to their offspring, whom they'll name after countries or distant relatives who were once regarded to be regal.

Gathering up the last of the discarded napkins on the table, you take one final, fleeting look just to see if a familiar face is with them.

It's not that you actively want to see him.

You just haven't seen him in the best part of a fortnight, which is odd.

He's been in your section of the Diner near enough every single night of the past three months—but school is starting up again, and he's got appearances to keep.

God-forbid Jeon Jungkook—son of the Admissions Director and heir-apparent to an unholy amount of real estate tied to the university—ever associates with the lowly scholarship kids like you.

The only reason The Untouchables ever come to this Diner is because it's the last remaining place close to the university that hasn't been snapped up and integrated into the campus. You guess it must feel like freedom to them, in a way.

In fact, you know this is the case. Jungkook has told you himself.

Has told you a lot.

Told you far too much.

Such candid honesty from him, shared during the lonely heat of a sweltering summer, is what makes it so jarring when he looks away as soon as his dark eyes meet yours.

Tall, broad, handsome; he's everything the gossip magazines you read during your downtime swoon over, but also everything they warn against. Too pretty for his own good, the resident agony aunt would call him if she were ever to see him. Would assume his ego is far larger than his shoe size; superiority complex embedded into his skin like the ink of his tattoos.

And while you think that perhaps those assumptions could be true, you also know the reality of him; how gentle his hands can be. Helpful, too. Delicate. Ornate, almost, when they fold bills into five petal flowers. Strong, when they grip the back of your neck. Commanding, when they're wrapped around his leather steering wheel.

You shouldn't know the way his car smells. Shouldn't know how he presses the heel of his palm against the wheel when he's reversing, or just how easy it is to clamber into the backseats over the centre console.

But you do, and it rests on your tongue like a dirty little secret desperate to escape: I know you.

You're not sure if you know him better than The Untouchables, but you know him independent of them. Not many people do.

It's rare to find him without Jimin cracking a joke by his side, or Claudia making a slightly mean remark masked as innocent ignorance as she leads him astray.

But summer happened, and so did Jungkook. With his friends away at their holiday homes, and his father's infidelity ripping his family apart at the seams, he'd needed something to stitch himself back together. Let you thread yourself through his very being, and once you'd tied yourself in a pretty little bow around his heart, he'd cut you off.

Is that not what all craftsmen do, though? Discard what no longer serves a purpose?

Memories of him, in all the places you never should have let him in, ravage your thoughts.

The scent of his aftershave lingers on the childhood plushie he used to tease you for having on your bed, but would also automatically hug into his chest every single time he entered your room.

The things he did—and the things he didn't do—corrupt your dreams and leave you restless when you wake.

The smudged mascara under your eyes hides the bags from your lack of sleep, and your only respite is that the little puffs beneath his eyes are extra prominent today. He's tried, too.

For a minute, you feel vindicated.

It doesn't last.

For the past few months, if he's been sleeping badly, you've known about it. Kept him company in this very Diner, or in the basement of a party house he was dumb enough to take you to, forgetting he'd have to return there after summer finished, too.

The walls might not talk, but Jackson Wang certainly does. Jungkook knows it's only a matter of time until his dirty little secrets—no matter how pure they actually are—become the talk of the town.

He always slept well in your bedroom, though.

Funny, that.

He's dressed simply, today: white t-shirt, black jeans, chunky black boots on his feet. It's still warm out, even if the sun does begin to set a little earlier than it had been during the hotter months. He's got no need for a jacket, and you despise how undeniably gorgeous his arms are in the dewy humidity. Tattoos trailing up and down his skin, you'd be forgiven for thinking he was a man of complexities.

Turns out he's just like every other good-for-nothing fuck boy who wasn't worth your time.

The Untouchables sit towards the front of the Diner. Your section is at the back, and there's no way in hell you're deviating from your set section. Not today. Not when he's with them.

"I thought we were free," your colleague, Maria, grumbles as you bring your tray to the counter.

Like you, she's a scholarship kid. Is the one who got you the job at the Diner after you both moved into the shared house you live in off-campus. Three of you live there—you, Maria, and Taehyung—and you all share the same disdain for The Untouchables.

"It never ends," you tease in reply. Glance over your shoulder, back at the table.

They're laughing and joking about something you can't quite decipher. All of them, except Jungkook.

There's a sternness to him. One of which you'd forgotten about. With one hand on the table, the other in his lap, his thumb fidgets over his tense knuckles. Sunglasses rest on the crown of his head, pushed up into his hair to hold it back off his face. Staring at nothing much, he's chewing up his bottom lip until he feels the familiar burn of your eyes on him. Looks your way.

It's curious, how looking at you halts his body from its self-soothing actions. He no longer nibbles on his lip. His tightly balled first eases.

"What do you think, Kookie?" Claudia drawls, drawing his attention back to the group. "You coming tonight?"

"Hm?" He questions, eyes pulling away from you. He begins to rub his thumb over his knuckles again. "Sorry, was just looking at the menu board. What are we talking about?"

"Party at the Conservatory," Jimin says from across the table. Though he's the one sitting beside Claudia, everyone knows Jungkook is the one that she's really interested in. Has been since their first day of college. "First of the semester. It's one of their birthdays. Reckon it'll be a big one."

On campus, but close enough to the boundaries that it's never infringed upon by security or university officials, the Conservatory isn't what it seems. A boarding house for the creme-de-la-creme of the Botany and Conservation PhD students, it's surrounded by land. Has rows upon rows of greenhouses for their projects.

Of the few times you've been there, you've always thought it was like a maze. The perfect place to get lost. The perfect place to get found, too.

Unfortunately for the PhD students, the house custodian took on the role for one thing and one thing only: to throw the biggest ragers on campus. Knows fuck all about growing anything that isn't illegal. Only managed to get the role, 'cause like the rest of The Untouchables, his dad works high up in the college. He's a few years older than them. Belongs to a different generation of campus royalty, but is keen on making sure his legacy remains.

After all, there ain't no party like a Jackson Wang party.

Namjoon—one of the Botanists and the birthday boy himself—has started padlocking the greenhouses.

Another one of them—Yoongi—minored in mechanical engineering. Has a coin-operated lock on his bathroom door. Makes enough money from a single Jackson Wang party to sustain himself for an entire month.

Hoseok and Jin, the remaining two, are just as messy as Jackson. Have only started PhDs because they don't know what else to do and don't want their youth to abruptly end. Live for the parties; survive for the studying.

"Now, who's told you that?" Jungkook smiles, as if the prospect of showing up at the Conservatory doesn't make him feel a little bit sick. "Jackson?"

"Obviously."

"Well, of course he's gonna tell you it'll be big," Jungkook laughs. "Wants to rope as many of you fuckers in as he can."

"And it works every time," Jimin smirks back. "If everyone thinks it'll be a rager, everyone will want to go. He's a marketing genius, if you ask me."

Jungkook rolls his eyes. Is fond in how he interacts with his friends. Has grown up with most of them. Whether or not they're everyones cup of tea is debatable, but they're his people.

And yet he finds himself glancing back over to the counter. You're not there anymore. Are out back, he assumes. Knows the layout, now. Where the walk-in freezer is. The little nook that you sit in during your break. He doubts any of his friends have ever been in a commercial kitchen, let alone one at a place like this.

While yes, his friends have only ever been good to him, he knows that it isn't the case for everyone they interact with. Is well aware that his friends would be confused beyond belief if they ever found out he knows how to click through the Diner's cash register and find the discount section. Would be even more perplexed if they were to see his initials hidden in one of the codes.

But summer was lonely.

Or at least it was.

Lonely, until it wasn't. Isolating, until he sought solace in someone he can't even bring himself to speak to in front of his friends.

Casting his eyes back down to the table, well aware that he's got no reason to feel as cut up as he does, he fakes a laugh. Looks up again at his friends with a grin so sincere that they'd never guess the way it feels like his heart is in his throat. "Alright. You're on. What time?"

The conversation dissolves into plans—what to wear, what drink to take.

After a summer apart, Jungkook thought it would be nice to be with his friends again. Thought he'd be excited; that he'd welcome them all back with open arms. Ask them about their summers, and lament his time spent here.

When Jimin asks him why he didn't go to the Italian villa his parents normally insist they spend the summer at, Jungkook shrugs.

"Dad has some stuff to sort out, so it was better to stay here," he says, minimising the reality of what really happened. Even you don't know for certain. All you know is that his father did something incredibly immoral, to the point where Jungkook can't even stand to look at him.

Is why he spent all those nights in the diner.

Was confusing at first. He was always angry. Always frowning. Always ordering black coffees and nothing else, huddled up in the corner booth, away from the world.

But with summer comes monsoons, and with monsoons come terrible conditions for walking home.

He expected you to say no when he offered you a ride. You expected to say no, too—but then a please and thank you had escaped your lips.

A routine grew. Habits formed.

Curious little thing, habits are. 21 days. That's all the time they take to develop.

Jungkook spent 63 days of summer with you in varying capacities. Enough time to learn a habit three times over.

The one that haunts him most is how it felt to have your hand beneath his on his gear stick. Finds the absence of you when he drives unbearable. Knows he's got no one to blame but himself; not just for creating distance, but also for minimising it in the first place.

He's the one who offered you a lift. He's the one who messaged you on your days off to see if you fancied going for a drive. He's the one who didn't turn the AC on just to get you shaking your jacket off your shoulders.

And he's the one that drove you out to the coast one evening for no other reason than wanting to hear the waves. He's the one who opened up to you about his family. He's the one that made things more than what they were.

Had walked along the shore with you, too scared to hold your hand beneath the lunar light. Opted for playful banter instead, nudging you into the lapping waves.

But the waves got bigger, and Jungkook's unbridled desire to have you close did just the same. Like always, he took things too far. Drenched in sea water, you'd laughed with him for the entire ride home.

Invited him in. Said, "The salt will ruin your clothes. We should wash them."

"Hand wash only," he'd said, pinging his damp t-shirt against his chest. It stuck to him in such a way you learned all of his edges before you ever saw him naked—not like there was much time between these two instances. Ended up in your shower with him, clothes beneath your feet, the excuse of hand washing disregarded the second he had you naked.

You learned three things about Jungkook in that shower.

The first is that he giggles. Lips on yours, hands clutching your jaw, whenever the water was a little too intrusive, he'd separate with a laugh. Would kiss you again, a smile still on his face. Would pretend as if he wasn't giggling.

But he was, and it was lovely.

The second was that he's the type to lean his head forward, not tip it back. With his hands pressed to the shower tiles behind you as your fingers wrapped around his thick shaft, he let his head dip to his chest. Gave him ample opportunity to press kisses to the top of your head—or at least it did until you got to your knees and started taking his hard cock in your mouth.

"Shit," he had husked. Whined. Praised. "Fuck. You're so fuckin' good at that."

It was around then that you became aware he was a head pusher, too.

Almost as if he was saving the best until last, the third thing you learned was how he likes to cum; in your sheets, cock buried in your pussy, your hands clasped above your head. Missionary, 'cause he likes to kiss you through it. In your bed, 'cause he likes losing himself in everything you are. Prefers finishing inside you, but you refuse to fuck him without a condom so he never gets exactly what he wants. It's close enough, though.

Spent weeks—months—laying unfair claim to your body, and now he can't bring himself to look in your direction. It infuriates you.

But more than anything else, it embarrasses you.

Even your reflection laughs at you. Cackles 'told you so' every time you look in the mirror.

You always wondered why you never heard much about Jungkook's hook ups around campus. Everyone knows about Jimin and how his cock has been perpetually wet since the first day of freshers week, but there's always been a secrecy when it comes to Jungkook.

It's something you've teased him about; in your sheets, bodies clammy, his heart beating so fast in his chest you'd been forgiven for thinking he'd just run a marathon.

"When do I have to sign it?" You had giggled.

"Sign what?" He'd husked, voice all wispy and fucked out.

"The NDA," you'd replied as if it was obvious. "It's been, like, what? A month? Surely it's about time you made sure I kept my mouth shut like all your other girls do?"

On your front, your arms were folded over his chest, and he was gently rearranging the pretty little updo he'd made a mess of. Though he was looking at his hands as he replied, you kept your eyes on his. Studied his sincerity.

"Reason you don't hear about other girls is 'cause there aren't any."

A smile twitched at the corner of your lips, but you didn't let it shine for him.

"Sure."

There was a small jerk to his torso as a breathy smirk formed on his face.

"You think I can't be trusted?"

"I think it's foolish to trust any man."

His deep, dark eyes sank down to focus on yours. Offered you all the sincerity you'd be searching for, and more.

"That's all I am, huh?" He'd challenged you. "Just another one of your men?"

"One of the many," you'd teased just to rile him up a little.

"Ah," he'd played along. "So that's why I always have to wear a condom?"

With a saccharine smirk on your lips, you'd gotten back in position, legs straddled over his hips. Had kissed him. Whispered, "No. That's just because I know it annoys you."

"You annoy me all the time," he'd mumbled into your lips, hands gripping your waist to get you grinding against his still sensitive cock. Barely fifteen minutes since he'd last finished, there was no way he was ready to go again.

"Hm?" You'd hummed against his kisses, then began to work your way down his neck in a way that always got him a little moany. "If I'm so annoying, why are you getting hard again, baby?"

"You can be annoying and hot," he told you as he desperately tried to not let his insatiable need for you show.

"Is that how you like your girls?" You'd ribbed once more, just to piss him off a little. It was never serious. Never something you would actually fret over.

Perhaps you should have done, but then he told you with a little too much candour, "No. It's how I like my girl. Singular."

Loose lips sink ships, and Jungkook was one iceberg away from greeting the ocean floor. Closing his lips back down on yours, he was making sure you were just as insatiable for him as he was for you. He didn't cum again that evening, even if you did more times than you cared to count.

A greedy lover, is Jeon Jungkook. Edacious.

And so you understand, now, why the girls he gets entangled with stay silent; how the hoaxes he plays leave them utterly hysterical. They're subject to silence, because who would possibly believe all those sweet little lies he tells? How mad would they be considered if they tried to convince anyone he has a heart?

His brazen lack of humanity is proven when he comes to pay for the table. Any of them could have done it. Yet he elects to stand in front of your till and wait for you to serve him.

Have you not served him enough?

You refuse to utter a single word in his direction. Don't look at him, don't give him any satisfaction. He can read it for himself, he can pay, and he can fuck off.

"Keep the change," he mumbles tossing down the bills—but like fuck are you gonna keep anything he gives you.

He begins to walk away, a little shrunken in his stature.

"Excuse me, sir."

Stopping dead in his tracks, Jungkook is perplexed to hear you address him so coldly.

"Your change," you say, holding a closed hand out for him to hold his own hand beneath. He doesn't want to cause a scene. Obliges. Is surprised when notes, not coins, fall into his palm.

More specifically, notes folded into the shape of flowers. His handiwork, he's certain. Was something he used to do in the early hours of your late night diner shifts. If he said something a little mean, or bickered with you a little too hard, he'd fold his notes up like posies and give them to you as a remedy.

Never used those notes to buy you real flowers, mind you.

Back when things were still easy, you pulled him up on it. Told him that you'd be far easier to seduce with a little wooing. He'd told you that you were easy to seduce regardless.

You didn't speak to him for the rest of your shift.

Ended it with fourteen folded bills in the shape of a bouquet, and when the backseat windows of his car had a thick veil of condensation coating them that same evening, he'd drawn you flowers on them.

"No point in flowers," he'd told you. "They just wither up and die."

Which is funny, 'cause it kinda looks like Jungkook is doing that very same thing right in this moment. He goes to speak, but nothing comes out.

Disappointing, you think, then realise of course he is. Has done nothing but disappoint you.

You smile. Jungkook looks like he wants to cry. Good.

"Don't let the door hit you on the way out."

21 repetitions. That's how many times it takes to form a habit. You know this.

You also know that 90 days of this repetition will form a habit to last a lifetime.

As you hook up your apron, and free your hair of the ribbon that had been tightly wrapped around your ponytail, you know these are 'lifetime' habits. Apron, then ponytail. Always.

But when you say goodbye to Maria, and ask if she'll be at home this evening, you find yourself leaning into a recently formed habit. It's not anything particularly noteworthy. Not something anyone would notice.

Well, not anyone who matters. You don't think Jungkook counts as someone who matters, anymore.

But he'd noticed; how you'd started glancing across to his parking spot whenever you clocked out. Had teased you for it. Asked you if it was the highlight of your day, seeing him there, as if it wasn't the highlight of his.

You should have known the playful banter when he told you not to get used to it wasn't really banter at all.

Yet here you are, glancing across to his parking spot only to see it empty.

It's not even like it's his spot. Whenever he's with his friends, they walk. Live right on campus, so don't need to drive, and if they do, they'll park right by the doors.

In the height of summer, when the lot was empty and Jungkook wasn't driving for his sake but for yours, he liked to park in the far corner. Said dumb shit about not wanting any weirdos scratching it. Whined and moaned whenever someone performed the very human act of parking next to the only other car in an empty parking lot.

"So many spaces!" He'd blather on. Would speak with his hands. Get deliberately more animated, 'cause it always made you laugh. "And they choose here?!"

The memories make you smile, until the yellow headlights of another car flood into the parking lot. They reveal what's right in front of you; a crowd of cars and not a single one of them you care for.

It's not like you cared for Jungkook, either. Was just something to pass the time when the streets were quiet and his head was loud. 

In turn, you gave him quiet, and he made your summer feel loud.

But the leaves are turning brown and the water in the roadside puddles is becoming stale. The seasons have changed and so has the nature of your interactions. It's fine. You don't care. Really. Couldn't think of anyone you'd want to hang around less. Would rather die than associate with The Untouchables.

You never needed a lift, not really. Especially not when it always took you an hour to get home 'cause Jungkook just wanted to keep on driving.

Grumbling to yourself just to try and divert your mind from thoughts of him, your heart almost skips a beat when your phone vibrates in your pocket. For a second, you wonder if it could be him.

Where you at? It could read. I'm here.

Or maybe, I miss you.

I can't sleep without you.

This is so stupid. Can I come over?

It won't say of those things and you damn well know it.

Your text thread is dormant. The last message is from you, two weeks prior.

You: you not coming in tonight?

You: you'll be pleased to know my fairy godmother turned a pumpkin into a carriage to make sure i got home safe x

You: ... at least let me know if ur alive?

Rolling your eyes at how mortifying your desperation feels, the scowl that settles into your expression is comical. It's like you're fighting with the wind that's threading itself through your hair.

Pulling your phone out, the scowl only intensifies.

Jackass Wang: party tonight

You: so????

One thing about Jackson is that he's not gonna leave anyone on read, especially when he's trying to drum up attendees for his parties.

Jackass Wang: so i haven't seen you around for a while, montgomery

"Fuckin' Montgomery," you mutter at the nickname.

It's the one that all of Jungkook's friends seem to refer to you as, as if you don't have a personality outside of your job.

Still, at least Jackson is a little bit inventive with it. Calls you Monts. Monty, Monstera Plant, Monte Carlo, and god knows what else. If it starts with 'Mon,' he's found a way to end it with a cheeky smirk and smug anticipatory look in your direction, as he awaits your reaction.

You: i like it better when i don't see you x

Jackass Wang: you know that isn't true. loverboy will be there. come with him. or don't. i don't care. you can bring your little friends with you.

You: they'd rather die :) x

Jackass Wang: y'know, you're replying an awful lot for a girl who's not interested ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You: you just can't take no for an answer

Jackass Wang: yes i can - but you haven't said no yet. c'mon. loverboy has been moping around all week. i can't be arsed with his mardy ass energy all evening.

You: so don't invite him???? i don't see why it's my problem?????

The fact that you don't need clarification of who Jackson means is proof enough that perhaps Jackson's onto something.

Jackass Wang: conservatory any time after 9. be there or be square montgomery. or don't be. i'm sure loverboy can get his dick wet without you, but it's easier for everyone if he doesn't.

You: charming x

Jackass Wang: it's why the ladies love me.

You: all of them except this one, apparently. have a nice party. stay away from the drugs.

Jackass Wang: can't be tamed, monte carlo. nor can loverboy. come keep him company.

The block button towards the top of your message thread looks incredibly tempting. Just a single click and you'll never have to deal with Jackson Wang and his dumb parties ever again.

Part of you can't believe you've ever been associated with them, as it is.

Summer defied the conventions of the life you've built for yourself. You weren't the person you thought you were.

Kicking off your shoes when you arrive home, the door slams shut behind you. A gentle voice calls through to check if it's you.

"Maria's still working," you say as you walk into the kitchen, tossing your bag down on the floor and your phone on the counter.

Taehyung, your best friend since your first week at college, is cooking himself dinner, but offers you a spoon of the tomato sauce he's making. Humming as you taste it, you're amazed by how he manages to make even the simplest thing delicious.

"S'good. What is that? Cumin?"

Nodding, he smiles. "A little paprika, too. You want some?"

His hair is dishevelled, blonde and sunkissed from the sweltering summer skies. He always looks great with a tan; radiant and full of youth.

Shaking your head, you really don't have an appetite. "Think I'm gonna have an early night."

He's about to reply when your phone buzzes. Both of you glance down. Your skin feels red hot, and when Taehyung almost chokes on the spoonful of sauce he's just tried, he's all sorts of confused.

"Why the fuck is Jackson Wang messaging you?"

"Hmm?" You hum as if you have no idea what he's talking about. Realise from the look on his face that he doesn't buy it for a second. "Oh! That Jackson Wang. Think he sent a text to his entire contact list. Something about a party."

"No," Taehyung asserts. "Absolutely not. You cannot bullshit out of this one."

"It's not bullshit," you whine as you pretend to look in the fridge for something to drink. Settle on a beer left by one of Taehyung's friends at a party held last semester. It wasn't quite a Jackson Wang level party, but nothing ever is. "He's just trying to drum up numbers for his stupid party tonight."

Taehyung is many things, but stupid he is not. Though he's blonde (thanks to a bottle of bleach and a few too many jack and cokes), he bends all the stereotypes. His tuition is covered by a scholarship for academic excellence.

"Don't give me that bull."

"It's not bull!"

"So you're telling me, out of everyone at our college, the Jackson Wang is texting you to make up numbers for his party?"

"Yes!" you exclaim, partially a little offended at it being such an unfathomable idea. "And he said you can come too, so maybe you're the one he's really after!"

His expression is flat. You are paper thin.

He's known you long enough to know when you're giving him half-truths.

He also knows you spent the summer alone in this house, and that there's a new toothbrush in the bathroom next to yours.

"You're hooking up with him, aren't you?"

"No!"

Out of everyone to be accused of sleeping with, Jackson Wang is, like, the worst of the worst. He's handsome, sure, but he's also slept with pretty much every girl on campus. Is a teenage boy in a grown adult's body. You'd rather not fornicate with a guy who still finds 'your mum' jokes funny.

Taehyung gasps at your immediate denial. "You are!"

"I'm not!"

"All that talk about saving it for someone special, and you mean to tell me you went and lost it to Jackson fuckin' Wang?!"

Everything about this conversation is making you want to punch yourself in the face. The topic of sex, and just why you've never gotten around to it, has dominated many conversations around this dining table. If you have to discuss it again, you might move out.

"Oh my God," you whine, throwing your head back. "We are not having this conversation."

"Yes, we are."

"No, we're not, because I didn't lose my virginity to Jackson Wang!" You stress. The more you think about it, the more offended you are.

"To Jackson Wang," Taehyung echoes, as he begins to join invisible dots. "But you did lose it to someone."

"No," you insist, but Taehyung refuses to buy it. Knows you too damn well.

He always thought he'd know when you lost it. That it'd be a boy you'd been dating. Committed to. Someone good. Someone worthy. Not someone you keep in the shadows.

"There's something you're not telling me," he frowns. "What the fuck happened this summer?"

With a sigh so deep it's a miracle you're still breathing, you relent. Never signed one of those NDA's you're convinced Jungkook must hand out like candy, as if he's some sort of celebrity and not just some college reprobate.

"Jungkook," you feebly admit. Take a sip on your beer. Don't look at Taheyung, 'cause you're afraid to see his reaction. "Wasn't Jackson. Was Jungkook."

You tell Taehyung everything. How Jungkook never knew you were a virgin. How he still doesn't. How you blame yourself for your hurt, but him for not getting you any band aids to help deal with it; for not kissing you better when he was the one to cause you such hurt in the first place.

As you recite you memories, you play a game against yourself: take a sip every time you want to cry.

By the time you've told Taehyung the nitty-gritty truth, the bottle of wine that had been in the fridge is finished, as well as your beer.

"I can't believe this," Taehyung says for what feels like the billionth time.

There's a certain shame that comes with Taehyung's confusion.

Embarrassment, like the way Jungkook would cringe at himself whenever he stumbled on his words, or the way you'd covered your reddening cheeks with your hands when he teased you for looking at him in the way you did.

Remorse of time wasted before him, and time wasted with him.

Regret of the things you did and the things he didn't.

It's all very confusing. Exhausting. If you were to really think about it, you'd spend a week in bed with a box of tissues. Would ask Taehyung why he didn't warn you that a heart could feel this horrid.

But he did, and you damn well know it.

Shrugging, you reach for the bottle and split the final few glugs between your glasses.

"We were just bored," you play it off. "Had nothing better to do. No one better to do."

But Taehyung shakes his head. "You don't have to do that, yanno. Pretend like it didn't matter. It's okay that it did. Even if he is a prick, and even if he's no better than the rest of them. It's okay that it hurts."

You're silent when he says this.

Despite your teasing, you never really thought Jungkook was much of a player.

But his friends are back now, and you've been relegated to the sidelines. Doesn't matter if he spent weeks—months—playing in no field but yours. Greener pastures have presumably sprouted. Your turf is wrecked from his carelessness, and he's left you to heal yourself while he goes and wrecks another.

Whoever he was pretending to be in the summer isn't who he is now that his friends are back—but when they're laughing and joking in the basement of the Conservatory that evening, Jungkook knows which version of himself he prefers.

"You need to get laid," Jimin tells Jungkook with a laugh. "Never seen a man look so bloody miserable at a party."

Of all the things Jungkook needs, getting laid is not one of them. In fact, he thinks it would be a very sensible idea if he never got laid again. Sex is messy. People get all emotional over it.

Or more so, he gets all emotional over it.

Had never been the type to, before. Always thought it was something that just happened to other people. Not to him.

He pushes the thoughts aside. Feels a little sick. Shrugs off Jimin's remark.

"If I wanted to get laid, I would get laid."

"So why don't you? Will do us all a favour. Claudia's been—"

"I couldn't give a fuck," Jungkook interrupts Jimin. "I'm not interested."

He never has been. Wants nothing to do with this university, and the men that run it, and so would never date one of their daughters.

They're all corrupt. Every last one of them. All cheat on their wives. All throw their families under the bus for their own selfish exploits. His own father's affair has proven this to him.

Jungkook pities his friends. Just because their parents haven't fucked up yet, doesn't mean they won't.

"Oi, Loverboy," Jackson calls from across the room, breaking the tension only to replace it with a headache for Jungkook. "Where's your little girlfriend? I told her to come."

"Who?" Jimin chirps.

Jungkook grates his jaw. Is deadly serious when he says, "Leave it, Jackson."

"Trouble in paradise for our lovebirds, huh?"

"I said leave it."

"Who the fuck is he talking about?" Jimin continues to ask, incredibly curious about this turn of events. Leave town for a couple of months, he thinks, and everything changes.

"No one."

"That one from the diner," Jackson just continues fuckin' talking. Jungkook wants to scream. "The one with a stick up her ass—"

"Jackson, cut it out," Jungkook snaps. "She's no one. Just fuckin' leave it."

"You ashamed, huh, Loverboy?" Jackson berates him a little bit. He isn't trying to be a dick, but he thinks Jungkook is acting like a tool. Jackson is no saint, but at least he doesn't ever pretend to be something he's not. "Poor girl. Wear her like your favourite pair of shoes all summer and then throw her to the trash when your friends come back? I thought better of you. So did she, probably. Shame."

Of all the people Jungkook ever expected to receive lessons in morality from, Jackson Wang was not the one. He parades himself around the Conservatory like Hugh Hefner reincarnated, his class attributed to money and not behaviours.

"The fuck have you been doing this summer, Kook?" Jimin laughs, utterly dumbfounded by his reactions.

They've all had their fair share of less than conventional lovers. If Jungkook has been fucking around with a girl from the Diner, then so what? Who cares?

"Nothing," Jungkook snaps.

It's not that he's ashamed. 

It's that you're separate.

When he's with you, all of this—the bullshit of college life and calamity of his family falling apart—dissolves into nothingness. He doesn't have to think. Finds himself at ease.

If you were to ever become a part of his life—his real one, not the one he got so used to living in with you over the summer—then it'd all change.

He doesn't want that.

He wants you to be a safe haven.

A refuge point can't be in the midst of a fire, though. He has to keep you away. At arms length.

But god damn, he wishes you would come and put out his fire. He's struggling. Finds existing without you so fucking hard. Doesn't know at which point he became so dependent, but knows his oxygen is running low.

He's suffocating. Isn't sure how much longer he can keep this up.

"Yeah, sure seems like nothing," Jimin smirks with a shake of his head as Jungkook storms off to get some much needed air. "Oi, Jackson, what was that all about?"

With a shrug, and yet another girl on his arm, Jackson grins. Puts on a pathetic little voice to mimic Jungkook's tantrum. "Fink baby boy has a wittle cwush."

"Girl from the diner?" Jimin implores, still smirking at Jackson's dumb humour. "Which one?"

"You really have to ask?"

For all of his mystery, Jungkook has never been a man of subtleties. His eyes give him away.

They always have done.

When he was looking at the menu board earlier that day? It was obvious.

Before college broke up for summer, and how Jungkook would always cast his eyes down to his hands whenever you, specifically, came to take their order? It was obvious.

How Jungkook would always make sure he was on the side of the booth that gave him ample opportunity to steal glances of you? It was so fucking obvious.

Sometimes he'd laugh at the slightly sarcastic remarks you gave Claudia whenever she would ask irritating questions about the menu.

When they were deciding where to eat, Jungkook would suggest the Montgomery's Diner, always.

So, no, Jimin doesn't really have to ask.

"Stupid prick," he sighs, sipping on his beer. Loves Jungkook to absolute death, but will never understand him. Figures that maybe you do. Worries that Jungkook is about to wreck it all. He calls after Jackson, "She here tonight?"

"Invited her," he calls back. "But she's got an attitude problem to rival his. Fuck knows if she's around. You'll feel her ice before you see her."

Which is funny, because the lingering summer heat sticks to your skin as you nervously meander up a driveway you know all too well.

The Conservatory is decidedly not a conservatory.

It's a complex. A maze of buildings, and greenhouses, and fuck knows what else. You've no interest in gardening, but if excelling at it meant living somewhere like this, maybe you'd consider taking it up as a hobby.

The buildings are mostly redbrick, with large windows, and even larger doors. It's the kind of place you'd imagine a Duke of some far away land prancing about in. Playing croquet, or secretly courting a lowly village girl that his parents will never approve of.

The irony isn't lost on you.

"Wait, how do I look?" Taehyung asks for what feels like the hundredth time. "Not too dressy?"

"You're wearing a waistcoat," you reply, face twisted in affectionate condemnation. He looks great, but he also does look far too dressy. It's his 'look', though, and one that'll get him attention, both good and bad.

If Kim Taehyung walked around with the arrogance his handsome face warranted him with, he'd be the heartthrob of the campus. You think even Claudia would want a slice of him—and given his distaste for the elite yet pining desire to be on their level, it'd be quite the complex pairing.

All of the other men here are in t-shirts, but Taehyung has never been like other men. It's part of the reason you like him so much.

One thing, however, you don't like about Taehyung is his domineering need to 'fix' things. It comes from a place of love, and he only ever does it because he cares, but it's not always in your best interest.

When he told you to go and get changed out of your work uniform, you thought he was planning on taking you to a bar. That you'd be drowning your sorrows over wine you can't afford.

You would never agree to go to the Conservatory. Not now.

Which is why he didn't tell you of his plan.

Instead, he ordered a cab and didn't give you the chance to protest. You were already halfway there by the time you realised.

"Why don't we just go home?" You whine, tugging on his arm as you stand by the gate that leads through the gardens—the same ones you used to traipse around in with Jungkook. "We don't need to be here."

"Uh-uh," he shakes his head, firmly standing his ground. "I've avoided this place for two years, and the second my back is turned it becomes your new home. The least you could do is invite me round for dinner."

"It's not my new home—"

"MONTGOMERY!"

The voice of Jackson Wang yelling across the front lawn makes you want to shrivel up and die. Sink down into the ground. You'd make great compost for the botanists.

"Y'know, you and Loverboy really need to stop lying so much," he says with an incredibly intoxicated grin as he lumbers towards you. You'll never admit it, but part of you is pleased to see him. "First you saying you weren't coming, then him telling everyone nothing happened between you. Both as bad as one another."

Nothing happened between you.

It doesn't surprise you, but it does sting. And it also confuses you. Why on earth would you be a topic of conversation? The people here know you as Montgomery. The girl from the diner. You're nothing but a background character to them.

"What did he say?" You ask, disregarding everything else, not even bothering to introduce Taehyung. He's finding all of this incredibly bewildering.

"Oh, Jimin was grilling him," Jackson waves his hands around, disregarding it. "Kept saying you were no one. Refused to admit that he'd practically tied his laces with yours for the whole summer. Don't you worry, though, Monte Carlo. I had your back. Set the record straight."

Jackson Wang having your back isn't something you ever expected to happen.

Jeon Jungkook's absolute denial of your clandestine affaire de cœur is, disappointingly, something you expected.

It doesn't mean that it comes without hurt. If anything, it's far more visceral, for you only have yourself to blame. These wounds are self-inflicted, even if they're carved with a knife Jungkook crafted out of silly affirmations he never should have made.

"Where is he?" You ask, cold in your tone.

Jackson shrugs. "Try the basement. S'where I last saw him."

As Jackson saunters off to find another poor partygoer to mildly offend, you're left with a bad taste in your mouth. You've been irritated since you saw Jungkook earlier that day.

How he can just show up at the diner and act like he doesn't even know you, let alone knows what it's like to wake up next to you, is beyond insulting.

"C'mon," Taehyung urges you along. "I need a drink, and you could use three."

Conversely, you think you need an entire bottle.

A bottle of what, you don't care. Just something strong. Anything other than the shitty, overpriced whisky Jungkook always insisted on drinking.

"Fine. But we're not going to the basement."

It's perplexing to walk the halls of the Conservatory without Jungkook; to pass by strangers who have no idea who you are, but who know and admire him as if he's some sort of Hollywood celebrity.

They don't know him like you do. Don't know what it feels like to have his hand around their throat, or his fingers gently intertwined with theirs. They've never heard him laugh like you have.

And yet when you're a few drinks deep, and on the verge of calling a cab to go home, you hear that laugh again and wonder how he can bear to be happy right now.

Glancing up, his face is unreadable. The lights are dim, and the shadows obscure the painful furrowing of his brows. He looks just the same as he did back in the diner earlier that day. Perplexed. In pain. Somehow perfectly fine, too.

The group he's in is small. Some of them you know, some of them you don't.

Claudia sits across from him on the lap of some other guy, yet she doesn't take her eyes off Jungkook. She laughs a little harder at his jokes. Directs questions to him. Flirts with other people in front of him to no avail. 

Not even now, after summer when her skin is sunkissed and her radiance is rejuvenated, can she keep his attention.

In fact, none of them can once he spots you from across the room. The big lights are off, fairy lights strung up, and a sunset lamp pours a clementine hue over you.

Summer becomes you, he thinks—adores—from afar.

The year is a body, and you're eternally condemned to its heart. That's where he'll keep you. Where you belong.

Had it been spring—the brain of the year—when he'd been hauled up in that diner, he never would have let things get as far as they did.

Had it been winter—the cunt of the year, for lack of a better term—he would have let it get that far, and he wouldn't have felt bad about it, either.

But Autumn is drawing close. The gut. The time to trust his intuition, and he damn well knows it.

A hand wraps itself around your wrist, dragging you away from his car crash eyes. Jungkook slips into the dull shadows of the room, right where he belongs. Was foolish of you to ever think otherwise.

"Do you mind?" you snap, but let yourself be dragged away regardless. Part of you hopes it'll make Jungkook do something. You're not sure what. Just something.

The man who is leading you astray is familiar. Recognisable. Park Jimin.

Though he's not aggressive, he definitely isn't gentle as he leads you out to the gardens. Lets go of your wrist by an overgrown shrub just beyond the benches that are made for drunken DMC's. He isn't after one of them. Wants the facts.

"Cut the bullshit," he says.

"No hello?" You chirp. "Nice to see you? Or better yet, an introduction?"

"You know who I am," Jimin tells you, expression flat. You hate that the arrogant fucker is right. "But I know fuck all about you, and apparently you're the reason Jungkook is walking around like death warmed up. So cut the bull. What happened?"

Frankly it's none of Jimin's business. Even if he's done you wrong, Jungkook trusted you. You're not gonna throw that back in his face and air his dirty laundry—especially not considering that Jimin is Jungkook's friend. If Jungkook wanted him to know, he'd have told him.

"Nothing," you tell him. "Barely even know him."

Jimin sighs. Jackson was right. There's a reason why you and Jungkook got along so well. Are both insufferable.

Glancing behind you, Jimin raises his brows.

You turn to face his line of vision, and fail to hide your surprise when you see Jungkook by the back door. Like a deer in headlights, he's frozen in place, his darling bambi eyes so startled he almost looks scared.

"So if you barely know him," Jimin continues as you and Jungkook stare one another out. "Why the fuck is he looking at you like he's seen a ghost?"

It takes a second or so, but you manage to pull your gaze away. Turn back to face Jimin. Shrug. Play dumb.

"Mistaken identity."

"Oh, I get it," Jimin smirks, knowing you aren't gonna give him an easy way out. Needs to bamboozle answers out of you. "You both went to the same bullshitting classes over summer? Is that it?"

You're surprised to find yourself smiling. Surprised that you find humour in Jimin's words. Surprised that you aren't rolling your eyes.

He's always been the Untouchable that has annoyed you the most. Is too loud. Laughs at the most obnoxious things.

"Top of the class," you reply because it somehow feels okay to joke with him. Perhaps spending so much time with Jungkook has lowered you Park Jimin-related intolerance. Not cured it, by any means, but definitely made it easier to manage.

"Academic rivals," Jimin supposes, realising that maybe there's a little more to you than he's ever given you credit for. "That's pretty hot."

"He seemed to think so," you lament, knowing that you're revealing a far more truthful rendition of your time spent with Jungkook. Or at least, admitting that time was spent together.

With a sigh, you walk a little further into the garden. Cross your arms. Look back over your shoulder to the door, only to find Jungkook is gone. It shouldn't upset you like it does, but you find your lips pressing together in a small pout.

"Look," Jimin says, exhaling a breath so deep you're sure his lungs must be empty. He comes to stand beside you, looking across the vast expanse of the gardens. "I'm not asking for your life story. If you don't give a shit about Kook, then that's fine, I'll leave you alone. But he's my best friend, and I've never seen him like this."

Glancing at Jimin, there's a taut discomfort on your face. Guilt, almost—but you've not done anything wrong. It's on him. He's the one who chose for things to be this way.

"I give a shit," you quietly admit as you look back out towards the garden, then sigh out a pitiful laugh. "You know him. You know what he's like. Of course I give a shit."

Quite honestly you think it's impossible to not fall for Jungkook. He's everything you're hardwired to appreciate: hardworking, charming, incredibly funny. You lost count of how many nights dissolved into laughter with him. Had never known your cheeks to hurt so much.

He was gentle, too. Stroked his thumbs against your cheeks just as often as he made them ache.

It's your heart that's aching now, and he's not around to soothe your woes.

Back inside, Jungkook feels so viscerally unwell that he thinks he might be sick. Or maybe he's actually dying. One of the two.

This is everything he didn't want. You were supposed to be separate. Supposed to be a sanctuary away from this all.

You're in the thick of it, now. Jimin is grilling you, and Jungkook doesn't know what to do. It's too much. All of it. The party, the people, the fact that you look at him with ice in your eyes when he knows damn well they used to harbour the warmest of fires.

Beelining for the basement, he kind of hopes the ground will swallow him up. Stop him from making the bad decisions he seems to find so god damn irresistible.

As he yanks open the small fridge at the back of the basement, Jungkook doesn't care what he drinks. Just needs something to help soothe his fragile mine; to make him feel better, 'cause lord knows you won't.

Reaching for a beer, he doesn't ask around to see if it belongs to anyone. Finders keepers. He's an Untouchable. This place is basically his by birthright. No one is gonna argue against him.

But Kim Taehyung isn't just anyone.

"So, when you apologise for being a gargantuan pillock, are you planning on also trying to win her over? Or will you just clean your conscience and wipe yourself clean of her, too?"

Jungkook's jaw tenses as his teeth grit together. "Don't know what you're on about."

"Had a girl in tears at my dinner table earlier tonight," Taehyung exaggerates. Just wants Jungkook to feel as awful as he knows you do. "Your friends might not give a shit about your well-being, but I give a shit about mine."

And for some reason, this irks Jungkook. He gives a shit about you. Cares so much he's been torturing himself by staying away. Thinks it's better for you both.

If it truly was, neither of you would be feeling so gut-wrenchingly awful.

He knows you're angry. You've made that perfectly clear.

But he also knows you do cry when you're frustrated. Was a lesson learned when you were stressed over the diner roof leaking one night during the monsoons when no one else was in to help you fix it.

It was the first night he offered you a lift home. Had taken pity on you. Had also liaised with the college maintenance guy to check it out the next day, even if the diner wasn't technically part of campus.

Because Jungkook does give a shit about your well-being, and he refutes the claim that he doesn't.

"So what? You here to tell me to stay away?" Jungkook scoffs as he prizes off the cap of the bottle. Swigs down a sip. Then another, 'cause he's not wankered enough for this.

"I'm here to tell you that you're an asshole," Taehyung asserts. "She didn't deserve to be used by you for the summer and then tossed to the trash just because semesters starting up again."

The roll of Jungkook's eyes is so weighted that it almost feels as if they'll get lodged in the back of his skull. The last time they'd rolled that deep was in bed with you. Back then it was because his body was so divinely out of sync that his muscles couldn't keep up with his actions. This time, pleasure is the furthest thing away from how he's feeling.

"You want me nowhere near her, but the fact I'm staying away makes me an asshole?" Jungkook petulantly laughs. "Can't ever fuckin' win, can I?"

"This isn't about winning or losing," Taehyung argues back. "She trusted you."

Jungkook doesn't understand what that has to do with anything. He's not betrayed your trust. Has kept all your secrets. Tried his best to keep you secret, too.

"What was she to you, huh? Some project? A virginity to get under your belt? Something to pass the time—"

"I don't know who you think I am," Jungkook snaps, fed up being accused of something he's not. "But not once did I ever treat her badly, okay? I—" He cuts himself off. Doesn't know how to articulate himself. "We— Look, you just don't get it. You don't know me. I was nothing but fuckin' nice. Okay? And she was nice. And it was nice. And we..." He trails off. Realises what Taehyung said. "The fuck do you mean, 'virginity to get under your belt'?"

It's about now that Taehyung realises he's said too much.

But every cloud has a silver lining.

"Talk to her," Taehyung shrugs as he begins to walk away. "Not me."

He leaves a scowling Jungkook by the fridge. Heads to the stairs, and once he reaches the top, is yanked away by a small but mighty force.

"You," Jimin asserts. "With me. Now."

The sound of three knocks on the bathroom door serve as a signal: let me in.

A panicked text from Taehyung had practically begged you to go to the basement bathroom and wait for him there. Said there was drama that he needed to talk with you about.

And you believed him, 'cause you're a few too many drinks deep and honestly could do with the respite.

Perched up on the countertop by the sink, you reach over and unhook the latch, giving Taehyung the all clear to come on in. Your legs languidly swing and your shoulders are slumped, this party well and truly over for you.

The only reason you're still here is because you know Taehyung's secretly been revelling in his first Conservatory party. You fear he'll want to come every weekend, now.

"You better not have your cock out," a playful voice you know all too well jokes, as the door pushes open. Eyes closed as he enters, he shuts the door behind him. Asks, "Am I safe to open my eyes?"

You're gonna kill Taehyung. 

In the most loving but brutal way, you will absolutelymurder him for setting you up like this.

"Safe," you grimace.

Jungkook doesn't open his eyes. In fact, he presses them even tighter together. Frowns. "Jimin isn't in here, is he?"

"We've been bamboozled," you sigh, and as much as he doesn't want to, Jungkook smiles at your choice of words. Tips his head down, and open his eyes. Is a little too scared to look your way, for fear of being greeted with wrath.

"Their days are numbered," Jungkook assures you, quickly glancing across to try and work out how you're feeling.

"My sentiments exactly."

Jungkook goes to speak, but you both notice a grating metallic noise by the door. Immediately, Jungkook presses his hand down on the door handle, but there's absolutely no give. It won't budge

"Jimin," he calls, voice strong and domineering through the wooden panels. Hastily painted white, they're chipped and tarnished; covered in numbers and Instagram handles, rumours and declarations of love. It's not your first time locked in this bathroom with Jungkook, but the last was of your own choice. Had been you turning the lock with a smile and glint in your eyes that had promised him trouble. "Open it up."

"No can do," Jimins smugly sings from beyond the door. "Sort your shit out."

Hopping off the counter, you nudge in front of Jungkook to pound against the door with an open fist. Though he steps back, it's still the closest you've been with him since he left your bedroom a couple weeks ago. Part of you laments the fact he moved away from you. Part of him does, too.

"Tae," you try calling instead, hand banging on the door, but you're met with the exact same response.

"Figure it out," he calls back, but also adds, "And if he's still an insufferable asshole in five minutes time, I'll come let you out."

Despite everything, you laugh at this. Not so much because of Taehyung's words, but because Jungkook's face screws up like an old newspaper.

"What is it with him and calling me an asshole?" Jungkook mutters under his breath with a shake of his head.

The bathroom is small—just a toilet and sink built into a cabinet. There's a mirror covering the back wall over it, and another cabinet above it that you assume is filled with empty bottles and misplaced lipglosses. There's barely even enough room to breathe, although there is enough room to make Jeon Jungkook come undone in the least dignified of ways. You should know.

You wish you didn't.

"He calls you one because you are one," you assure him.

"Excuse me?" 

"What?" You scoff, hopping back up on the counter, your eyes on his 'cause you want to watch the way he gets nasty. Wanna remind yourself of how horrible he can be. Replace the memories of him in this bathroom, 'cause in all reality, they're actually really lovely. Nice, even. Warm. Everything you're trying to convince yourself he's not. "Gone deaf as well as turned into a massive prick?"

"Jesus Christ," he says, rolling his eyes, turning back to face the door. Shakes at the handle. "Give it a rest."

"Why?" You ask as if butter wouldn't melt on your tongue. "Would it make life easier for you if I just wasn't around?"

Jungkook knows what you're doing. Has bickered with you enough times to understand your tricks. This is how you start; put words in his mouth that he can't defend against.

And so he doesn't try.

"Yep," he declares, turning to face you. "Way easier. Can you tell your friend I'm an asshole, still? Get us out of this place?"

You recline in defiance. Perched up on the counter next to the basin, your back is against a mirror. Legs crossed, you're in the same white summer dress you wore to your first party at the Conservatory.

Nearly everyone had been away for the summer.

You had spent the evening tucked up together on an armchair meant for one, him in the seat, you perched on the armrest, feet in his lap.

"People will talk, y'know," you'd assured him, elbows on your knees, chin in your palms.

"So let them talk," he'd smirked. "What's there to say? We're just sitting?"

It was strange for him to be seen with you. Even Jackson has been confused, but let it slide 'cause another partygoer is another partygoer. He cared for numbers, not names.

"Dunno," you had teased. "Might start talking about the way you look at me."

"Yeah?" He'd husked as his long fingers wrapped around your wrist. Gently pulled you closer.

"Yeah," you'd whispered, the sound of the music keeping your conversation obscure. "How long has it been that you've been looking at me for? A minute, already? Only one more until you fall in love, according to science."

"You tryna make me fall in love with you, Montgomery?"

"No," you'd innocently chirped, then pulled back. "Why? Were you?"

He'd shrugged. Sipped on his beer. "Guess we'll never know."

Looking at him now, you find it hard to believe he's the same person as he was back then.

"Why would I do that?" You feign naivety. "You're not an asshole?"

He doesn't reply. Knows you're going somewhere with this. Leans his back against the wall opposite you and folds his arms as if to say, go on.

"Assholes fuck people over," you state. "You'd never do that. And you'd definitely never spend your summer in some poor girls sheets and then pretend like she doesn't exist in front of your friends—"

"There is it," he confirms. Knew it was coming. Didn't expect you to actually try and speak about things like adults. So fuckin' childish.

"Oh?" You chirp. "So you're well aware of the fact you're an asshole? Good. Glad we have that one sorted out."

"Yep," he confirms, mouth drawing to a thin line.

The fact he isn't engaging in the fight infuriates you. Just proves he doesn't care. That he fucked you over for sport.

"I'm an asshole," he says, voice full of snark. "You know it, I know it. There's no reason why you should want to be around me. No reason why you should waste your time."

"It's so funny," you gasp in fake surprise. "I was thinking the exact same thing! Isn't it so great that you came to this conclusion after you already wasted months of my life?"

He's silent, now. Cowardly.

"Y'know I always knew you were an obnoxious prick," you say, voice now soberly quiet. "But I didn't think you were this cruel, Kook."

"You know that's not—"

"What?" You interrupt, voice growing louder with each question. "Not true? You woke up in my bed one morning, and then never spoke to me again. Who does that? What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"I don't know!" He shouts, and it surprises you both.

Raking his hand through his hair as he turns away from you, Jungkook wishes he had an answer. Wishes he could explain himself in a way that made sense to you both. Instead, he harshly swallows down his anger. Turns to face you again. Looks like he might cry.

Feels like it, too. 

"Why didn't you tell me, huh?" He quietly asks.

"Tell you wha—"

"That you were a virgin."

Your previous thoughts about murdering Taehyung return. Of all the things he could have divulged to Jungkook, and that's what he chose?!

Men, you internally scoff. All fuckin' idiots.

"Hardly relevant, is it?"

"Of course it is," he snaps, turning back to face you. "If I'd have known—"

"You'd have what? Ghosted me sooner? Made it into a fun little competition?"

"I didn't ghost you."

"Gaslighting, too, now are we?" You scoff. "Hold on, let me go and get my bingo card. Things Jungkook does that are absolutely fucking infuriating. Wanna cross it off the list. It's right next to how fast you drive your car, and how much I hate your stupid fucking alarm tone."

"Well good job you never have to hear it again, isn't it?"

"Why not? 'Cause you are ghosting me?"

"No, because this is fuckin' stupid," he says, yanking on the door handle, on the off chance it will finally budge. It doesn't. "You think I'm the devil reincarnated. You don't want me, so why bother with this? This is done. Us. Whatever the fuck it was. You never trusted me in the first place. Would have told me if you did. So just call your friend, tell him I'm an asshole. We're done."

"Oh, well you're two weeks too late for this conversation, don't you think?" you argue back with a cold laugh. "But has it ever occurred to you that my life doesn't revolve around you? That you aren't the reason I'm here? Jackson invited me."

"Ah, so that's what it is?" Jungkook sarcastically exclaims, your insatiable need to fight finally sinking into his skin. "You were just using me, huh? Getting those V-plates off, so you could be ready for him? Is that why you didn't tell me? Huh?"

The mere thought of hooking up with the college's very own Hugh Hefner makes you wanna gag—but if it'll piss off Jungkook, maybe you'll consider it.

"Why would you care if I let him fuck me?" You ask with such pointed anger Jungkook can't help but feel like you're driving knives into his chest. "Do that thing you like with my tongue? You think he'd like my pussy, huh? Maybe I'd let him fuck me raw."

You never let Jungkook go unprotected. Insisted on it each and every time, and he complied even if he was a little pouty about it after you'd been fucking for a while. The trust was there. You were on the pill. He knew he was clean and had told you as such, but it made no difference.

To even suggest you'd let Jackson fuck you raw is laughable.

With a smirk on his lips, Jungkook edges towards you.

Put his hands on your crossed knees. Waits for you to jerk him away—but you don't. Instead, you watch on with salacious confusion. Say nothing. Not even when he uncrosses them, nor when he spreads them apart.

With a hand either side of your head against the mirror, Jungkook stands between your legs.

Looks down at you.

Is so close you can smell his aftershave.

A month ago, in a position like this, you'd have kissed him.

"Hm?" You cock your head. Repeat your question. "You think he'd like my pussy? How long do you think he'd take to cum? Longer than you, I hope."

Jaw tense, Jungkook swallows down the way he wants to curse you out. Closes his eyes. Lets his head dip further, his forehead now resting against the top of your head.

The contact is minimal, but God, you've missed it. Trapped in position by him, you'd forgotten how lovely it was to lose yourself to Jungkook.

"You're not being fair," he whispers. Whines, even.

"Fair?" You laugh, but it's gentle. Matches his tone. "You can hardly take the high ground on fairness, Jungkook."

He nods. Takes a second, and then pathetically begs: "Don't fuck him. Please."

"Why shouldn't I?"

"You know why," he says. Stands straighter, now. Rakes a hand through his hair. Looks down on you with such pained desperation you almost feel bad. He tries to speak, but struggles with his words again. Takes him a few attempts to get anything out. "I didn't like you because I was fucking you. I fucked you because I liked you. You know that. You know it wasn't...Fuck. You know what it was."

The past tense he speaks in cuts you up inside.

Jungkook shrugs in defeat when he's met with silence. Purses his lips. Eyes on yours, they're glassy. Watery, almost.

Yours are just as bad, because what the fuck are you supposed to say to that? He's the one that cut you out. He did this.

"What did I do?" You ask, voice meagre and pathetic. Your vulnerability is mortifying, and yet you just can't help yourself as a tear streaks down your cheek. "What the fuck did I do that was so wrong, Kook?"

The heat of his hand scalds your skin as his thumb wipes away your tears. After his cold shoulder for the past two weeks, your body doesn't know how to respond. Should you be angry? Hurt? Comforted?

All you know is that you're more confused now than you ever were when you first started hooking up with him.

"Nothing," he quietly promises. Holds your cheeks in his hands. Rests his nose beside yours. Is far too close for a man who's been trying to stay away from you. Is beginning to realise that maybe his self-preservation was thinly veiled self-sabotage instead. "I thought I was doing the right thing, but it's been so fuckin' miserable, and then I didn't know how to fix things, and then it was all such a mess and—"

The words Jungkook is yet to speak are lost in the soft press of your lips against his.

Brows furrowed, Jungkook's grip on your face tightens. Keeps you close, 'cause he feels the pressure of your lips waning but doesn't want you to pull away.

And so you don't. Instead you apply more pressure. Harder. Deeper.

It's not like kissing Jungkook is a new experience. You've done it upwards of a thousand times, now. You know his lips and his tongue, and how it likes to flick against yours; his piercings, and the frequency of his moans that vibrate into your mouth.

Kissing Jungkook is just as easy as it is hard. Easy, in the way he takes not a single considered thought. Hard, in how it becomes your only tangible thought for minutes, hours, days afterwards.

An eternity and a millisecond is lost in the kiss, just like the summer that lasted an age and yet was gone with the wind.

When your lips finally part, there's silence. Forehead resting on yours, Jungkook shakes his head ever so gently. Doesn't know how to articulate his thoughts. How to say sorry, or how to fix his mess.

While his logic was flawed, and his execution careless, his intentions had been good. As much as he had a life to go back to, and friends that wouldn't get it, so did you.

He knows they hate him—isn't ignorant to the roll of Maria's eyes every time they walk into Montgomery's, and has experienced Taehyung's disdain first-hand this evening.

He'd spent his summer getting out of the house to avoid the fall-out of his father's infidelity. Knows how much his family is suffering all because of a man who just couldn't control himself. Was trying to be better. Trying not to wreck both of your lives.

As he stands in the dingy bathroom of a party house, the lingering burn of your lips on his still smouldering, he knows that he wrecked you both regardless.

And so it's up to him to put you back together again.

"I'm sorry," you say as you break the kiss, mortified at how stupid of an impulse it had been. You don't that. Not anymore. A month ago, sure, kissing Jungkook in a dingy bathroom at a party house would have been exciting. Now, it just feels embarrassing. "I shouldn't have—"

His lips are on yours again, stealing your words from you. He doesn't want to hear you apologise. Knows that you don't need to.  Also knows that he does need to.

"Don't," he quickly says between kisses. "Please, don't say sorry."

"But I—"

"Shut up," he smiles against your lips, shaking his head ever so slightly. He kisses you again, and this time it's soft. Pretty. Poetic, almost in how it makes you feel. And then he speaks, and you're reminded of just how easy it is to adore him, even when you know you shouldn't. "You know how much I've missed this? God, I've missed you so much. Please don't say sorry. I'm sorry. It's on me. I made a mistake, alright? I fucked up." 

He pulls back. Has your cheeks in his hands as he makes sure your eyes are on his. They're dark, now, in the dim light of the bathroom you're in, but they've never been warmer.

"I mean it. I'm so fucking sorry," he whispers. Brows furrowed, lips pouty, he's got the kind of face you're hardwired to trust. To adore. Or maybe, it's just him, in general, that you're inclined to feel this way about. "Okay?"

His large hard hands are still holding your cheeks, as yours wrap around his wrists. With a shake of your head, you shrug. Pout, too.

An apology is appreciated, but it's just words. It's his actions that have been upsetting you. Not his words (or lack thereof).

"We're gonna leave this bathroom and you're gonna pretend like I don't exist again," you tell him.

The frown on his face deepens. "That's not true. And that's not what I was trying to do in the first place, either. I just thought—"

"What? That it was a good idea to kiss me on my doorstep and promise you'd pick me up from work, only to never show? To ignore my texts? To—"

"No," he quietly admits, dropping his head between his shoulders. "I made the wrong calls—but I can make it up to you. I want to make it up to you." He rests his forehead against yours. Quietly begs, "Please."

Slowly, Jungkook nudges his nose up against yours. Waits for permission.

Beyond the door, loud music thuds through the room. It obscures the conversation you've been having, keeping you just as secret as you always have been.

It's not like you told any of your friends, either, and when it came to telling Taehyung, you weren't exactly forthcoming. Perhaps you would have been the one to pretend like he didn't exist, had he not done it first.

"I want you," he husks against your lips. 

"You wanna fuck me," you correct him, lips tantalisingly brushing his with every word.

"True," he admits. "But I also wanna send you dumb memes again, and go for drives after work, and wake up in your bed. I wanna go for breakfast, and I still need to cook you my world-famous makguksu. I want to have not been a dick for the past two weeks, but I can't change that. I just wanna be what I once was to you again."

"And what was that?" You encourage.

There was never any label. Realistically, there's no right answer. 

Or at least there isn't, until Jungkook just simply says, "Yours."

And what else can you do when confronted by such a pathetic, yearnful admittance from him, except to give into how you're feeling, too?

Frantic in the way your hands are on his body—his arms, his waist, around his throat—there's a neediness to you. One he's missed. One he reciprocates, as his large palms stroke up your spread thighs, then get your legs wrapped around his hips.

The movements of your bodies are so well nurtured by now that you know what comes next; how the bulge in his trousers will press against your covered pussy, and how you'll whine at the contact no matter how minimal.

"Fuck," you whine as his hands slip under the skirt of your dress. It's an old routine at this point. He knows exactly where to go, what to do. His fingers press against the wet fabric of your underwear, just gently enough to make you moan a little harder into his mouth.

"Oh?" He smirks when he realises just how needy you are, his fingers stroking against your slick panties. "Missed me, too?"

"You're an asshole," you tell him with a smile. As his fingers get firmer, you can't help but whine. "You know I have."

He pulls back to look down at your body. Pushes the fabric of your dress out of the way. Curses when he realises the underwear you're wearing. Is his favourite pair. Red and lacy, there's a suspender belt to match it. While you're not wearing it right now, he's got pictures of you in it that belong in a fuckin' museum.

"Did you wanna fuck me tonight, huh?" He mumbles into your lips.

"Not everything is about you," you say with a smile, wrapping your arms around his neck.

Except it is. They're your favourite pair too, simply for how insanely he reacted to seeing you in them. Sure you're not in the full set up, but it was enough to have you feeling ever so confident as you left the house with Taehyung.

As his lips press against yours, his finger hooks beneath your underwear. Tugs them to the side. Gets you exposed for him.

"No?" He husks, as his fingers begin to sink between your soaked folds. "So this isn't about me, huh?"

You shake your head. Lie. "Never been less turned on."

He plays into your little theatrics. Has always enjoyed them.

"So you don't want me to do this?" He asks as his middle finger sinks into your entrance.

"Can't even feel it," you pretend, as if his thick knuckles aren't stroking against you in just the right way.

"No?" He grits. Sinks a second finger inside you. Gets you whining again, nails gripping onto his arms. His fingers slowly pump into you, easing you into the way it feels for him to be inside you.

There's something electric about Jungkook. Sends shivers through your spine. Always knew exactly how to manipulate your pussy into doing whatever he wanted, and now is no different. As you clench around him, he's overcome with satisfaction.

"This is just my fingers," he reminds you. "I don't think you can handle my cock."

Scoffing, you're desperately trying to pretend you aren't melting for him. "Please, I can handle it just fine."

"Sure you can, baby," he teases with so much arrogance you kinda wanna fight him again—but it's also why you like him. He challenges you. Gets your brain in overdrive.

And when he crouches in front of the counter, eyes aligned with your exposed cunt, you think you might actually lose it entirely.

His hands are on your thighs, spreading you further, getting a good look at the mess between your legs. When he sighs, the shallow breath that escapes his lips feels like absolute sin against your wetness.

"Oh, you really haven't been fucked since me, have you?" He teases again. "Look at how fucking keen you are. Been missing my cock, huh?"

"My vibrator's been doing the job just fine," you assure him, but it has him pulling back to cock a brow in your direction. He knows many things about you that other people don't, but he was not aware you owned any sex toys. Finds that his cock only throbs even harder in his pants at this revelation.

"Maybe so," he husks, leaning closer just so he drags his flat tongue up your folds. Has to stop himself from moaning, 'cause the taste of you is somehow even better than his memories. "But it's not better than me."

With a point to prove, and a desperation to reclaim you as his own, Jungkook doesn't entertain chitchat any longer. He dives back in, tongue lapping against your lips as his fingers push back inside you. The way he curls them just right as his tongue flicks against your clit is enough to make anyone lose their head.

Hands tangling in his hair, you find your body responding to him in the way it always does; pathetically, needily, hungrily. There's no dignity to be found.

His tongue works against you like a well trained craft, until his lips latch around your swollen bud and begin to lightly suck on it. When he hums in satisfaction—which he does often—the suction only grows stronger.

Gets you whimpering, "Like that. Fuck. Like that."

The build is just as undignified as you are. Your grip on his hair gets tighter, and the shake of your legs grows stronger. Dragging his tongue up and down your folds, he settles back on your clit. Flicks his pointed tongue against you until he knows you can't take it any longer and begins to suck again. Curves his fingers just right. Strokes you so gently that orgasm pours out of you like liquid gold. Guilds him into the most gorgeous aureate glow.

He doesn't ease. Keeps his lips wrapped around your clit. Makes sure you're spent.

When he finally releases you, he's breathing just as heavily as you are. Gets to his feet, fingers still plugged in your tight pussy. Is pleased to find you're just as insatiable as he is, pulling him in for the messiest of kisses as soon as you can. There's no care given for the fact he's covered in your arousal. You just want that tongue of his in your mouth—and when it is, you find yourself moaning from the withdrawal of his fingers.

Your hands reach to the waistband of his jeans to unhook his button. Get his zipper down. Your hands down the front of his trousers, when his thick cock is restricted by his tight boxer briefs. By the tip of his cock, a small wet patch resides; his desperation for you obvious. Gently rubbing your thumb across the pre-cum, all you can think about is his slit, and how you wanna kitten lick across it.

But it's been two weeks of near-constant pining, and all Jungkook wants is to bury himself inside you.

"Let me fuck you," he begs. "Please, baby."

If the girl who had first seen Jungkook in a shared lecture hall two years ago would have known she'd end up in a shitty bathroom with him begging for her, she'd have laughed. Wouldn't have believed it for a second.

Fresh-faced and so out of your comfort zone, the first few days at university were full of potential. It was before you had wised up to your place in the pecking order; when Jungkook was just a boy in your orientation class.

Skin kissed by European sun, there had been a radiance to him that seemed to captivate just about everyone. You weren't the only girl who had been sneaking glances his way.

You'd thought about him a lot in those first few weeks. Came to learn of his family ties around the same time you befriended Taehyung. Stopped seeing him around campus so much, and rarely ever thought of him.

But on those rare occasions you crossed paths, your gaze would always linger.

As he frees himself of his boxers, trousers suspended midway down his thighs, he gently rubs the tip of his cock between your folds and husks, "Always thought you were so pretty, y'know?"

Looking up at you for just a second, he smirks. Looks back down. Continues to rub himself against you, prepping himself with your slickness.

"Freshers week," he continues. "You never came to any of the parties."

The tip of his cock kisses your entrance, but doesn't penetrate. You stay in limbo just shy of what you both want.

"Had a stupid fuckin' crush on you," he admits. Has never acknowledged it before, but has always known. Kept it hidden. Safe. Secret.

"No, you didn't," you smile. He didn't even give you a second glance. Was always you seeking him out in lecture halls.

"I did," he says with absolute certainty. "You wore that little black sundress on our first day. Had ruffles on the shoulders."

It hangs in your wardrobe, a little out of style but still sweet in the right setting. You know the exact one he's talking about, because he's right. You did wear it on that very first day.

His cock nudges a little deeper. Enough to make you gasp, but not moan. Not yet. Gripping his arms, brows furrowed, you nod. He sinks himself just a little bit further. The feeling is overwhelming; fire on ice.

"Would have fucked you in that lecture hall, if you'd have let me," he smirks.

"You didn't even know my name," you counter, but he cuts your questioning off as he edges a little deeper, still. His hand dips to gently rub languid circles on your clit. He's not pushing himself any further, not yet. Wants to ease into how this feels.

"I did," he admits. "Listened extra hard during the roll call."

"So this has all been some big elaborate scheme to get into my pants, huh?"

"Is it working?" he jokes, leaning over to yank the cabinet above the sink open. A few random bottles and packets clatter into the sink, but he doesn't care.

He's looking on the top shelf, rifling through old boxes, sending more miscellaneous objects to their untimely demise. Spotting what he's after, he's assertive as he knocks the cabinet shut. Passes you the box.

"S'all there is. They alright?"

"Sure," you say, pulling one of the foil packets from the box. You check the date stamped on the front—only to see it's a year out of date. Some protection would be better than none, regardless of the date, but fuck it. You're on the pill. "You haven't fucked anyone else? In the last couple weeks?"

"What?" His brows contort in confusion. "No."

His expression softens, but is still laced with confusion when you toss the box of condoms down into the sink.

"I don't care. I don't want them—"

You're cut off by the way Jungkook clasps your jaw, keeping your eyes locked on his. There's a seriousness to him now; the same demeanour he holds himself with when he was taking photographs. He's intentional. Assertive.

"Promise me," he says with stern certainty. "You want this?"

When he's got you like this—legs spread, body his to claim, your soul to take—it's impossible to do anything but comply. See, things with Jungkook are reciprocal. Your feelings, your tortured misunderstanding of how a relationship could ever work, and his seriousness, now, too.

"I promise," you swear.

As a chaste kiss is pressed to your lips, his hands stroke down your spread thighs, pushing you a little further open for him.

"Can't unfuck me," he softly reminds you. Is taking his time not for the anticipation, but because he's scared. "If you fuck me raw—"

"Then I fuck you raw," you simply repeat, knowing that it's up to you to ease his woes. If anyone should be scared, it's you—yet there's a safety that comes with being with Jungkook. Smirk, then say, "Trust me. I know I can't unfuck you. I've been trying to forget—"

"Ouch," he laughs, nudging his nose up against yours.

"—but you're just..." you tailed off, not wanting to compliment him too highly. He's still in the dog house. "Memorable."

With a sardonic smile that he knows only means trouble, you reach down to grip his incredibly pert ass cheeks. Squeezing, just because you can, you encourage him to push even deeper into you—and he's the one who whines, now.

"God, you're so fuckin' tight," he praises with such pained desperation it almost sounds like he'll cry. He won't. It's just that he can't quite believe that he's raw inside you right now, and that you feel just as good as he always imagined. Better, even.

"Yeah?" You question, as you pull his hips closer, gasping as he finally sinks his full length into you once more. His fingers were thick, but they've got nothing on his cock. Like he's taken all the air from your lungs, your voice is all light and airy. Makes Jungkook even more insane.

"Yeah," he mumbles as he nods into a kiss that is just as feverant as his need to pulse his hips. He doesn't dare do it yet. Is waiting for you. "Feels so fuckin' good."

"So just fuck me," you hungrily moan into his lips.

You're challenging him deliberately, and it works a fucking treat when he pulls back with a grin. He doesn't withdraw himself, but he does pulse his hips ever so slightly. Keeps you plugged. Is just nudging even deeper into you as he keeps a hold on your thighs, keeping them spread nice and wide.

"Say please," he grunts as his pulsing becomes a singular deep thrust.

Your argumentative streak wants to fight.

You'll berate yourself later for the way you whimper, "Please."

His thick cock withdraws just a little to push back into you. He groans. Curses. Builds momentum. Speed.

The sound of his skin slapping against yours as he pounds himself into you is impossible to ignore. Your moans build. Double. Treble. He's grunting too, and then his lips are on your neck. It's a mess, quite frankly.

In the sordid shadows of this bathroom, your bodies become acquainted with an intimacy not yet bridged before. You can pretend to ignore each other in the hallways of your shared lecture buildings, but you'll never be able to ignore the desperation you have for one another. Jungkook was right. You can't unfuck him. And now he's fucking you raw, it only make it even more potent.

Harshly pulling himself out of you, Jungkook almost fuckin' cums on the spot when he realises how soaked he is from your arousal. It's not like it's a new thing, but skin on skin, it's so much more intense. Gasping from the sudden loss of pressure, you're a little unsteady. Lurch forward as if your body could stop him from withdrawing.

Holding the base of his thick shaft, Jungkook spanks against your pussy with his cock. Rubs your slick wetness around with his tip. Hooks his elbows under your thighs. Pulls you closer. Instructs, "Arms around my neck."

Wrapping an arm around your back, the other one tucks under your ass as he lifts you.

He turns. Presses your back to the wall, and lines himself up.

"Legs around me," he tells you, and as soon as you do, his cock pushes up into you again. He keeps you pinned against the wall as he begins to fuck himself into you, his lips pressing wet kisses to the curve of your neck.

The sight in the mirror behind him is lethal; his broad back covered by his shirt, but it doesn't matter. You know what he looks like. Know his muscles, and the valley of his spine, like the back of your own damn hand.

You wanna see it though. Give it a tug. Send him the right message. Get him tearing his shirt off and dropping it to the floor for you. Victory is so damn sweet.

"Kook," you whine as he really begins to get deep. "You're gonna make me cum."

"All over my cock, huh?" He grunts. "Gonna cum on cock, are you?"

His taunting only makes you whimper even more. "I'm so close."

And because he just likes to get you all whiney and needy, Jungkook stops. Puts you down. Gets you facing the mirror as you protest his unfair stealing of an orgasm.

But then he's lining himself up again, getting ready to take you from behind. Spanks your ass ever so quickly.

Sinking into you again, Jungkook curses. "Tighter like this."

"Good?" You pathetically check, and Jungkook can't help but think it's sweet.

"Yeah, babe," he promises, and pretends as if it's completely usual for him to speak to you so tenderly. "Feels so fuckin' good. Missed you so much, gorgeous. You and this tight cunt."

"Romance," you joke through your needy whines. He smirks at this, and delivers a curt little spank to your ass.

"I can be romantic," he assures you, as if you aren't being soundtracked by the sound of your skin slapping together, his thick cock fucking itself into your soaked hole. 

His eyes rise from the steady gaze he'd had on your ass to your eyes. 

Slowing himself, Jungkook holds his cock inside you without thrusting. Says, "I made that photo you took of us in your room my fuckin' phone wallpaper. I listen to that asmr guy you like before bed, every single fuckin' night. I keep one of your ribbons tied around my gearstick. That romantic enough for you?"

There's an incredibly bashful smile on your pretty face, which contradicts the way in which your pussy is tightening around him in the most lewd of ways. You're giggling when you say, "Shut up and fuck me."

But then he's giggling too, just how you like him to be. Says, "I missed your body, but I missed you more. Stupid."

"You're stupid."

"You're stupider."

"Kook," you laugh, as he's completely forgotten the task at hand. The way that he looks at you, you'd be forgiven for thinking he has. Truthfully, the connection he has with you is so much more than what sex has ever been for him before. 

His hips lightly pulse, as he says, "Sorry. Where were we?"

"Think you were gonna make me cum."

"Ah, yeah. That. My bad."

His gentle thrusts begin to build pace once more. The grin on his face drops a little as he begins to concentrate on you. Watching him in the mirror, you're perplexed to be reminded of just how ethereal Jungkook looks when he fucks.

The deep ridge between his brows intensifies, as his mouth hands slack. His cheeks hollow a little, and his eyes remain entirely focused. Dark. Deep. Brooding.

As his hand dips around to gently stroke against your clit, Jungkook is just as taken away by the way you look. He isn't sure what it is that gets his heart so heavy in his chest, but he knows that he wants you to cum. Doesn't give a fuck about himself.

The walls of your cunt begin to tighten around his length as your moans deepen. You whine his name and he encourages a response, but neither of you can really talk. A numbness is washing over you, your balance unsteady.

"I'm gonna..." you begin, but find it impossible to finish.

"I know, baby," he nods all out of breath and desperately fucked out. "Give me what I want. Cum for me."

You trust and keep your eyes on him, but the nudging on his cock against your g-spot and the slow rubbing of your clit is just enough to tip you over.

"Kook," you whimper as your walls begin to tighten around him, but it's fruitless. There's a shake to your legs, and he's the only thing keeping you supported.

"Oh, fuck," he curses from the strength of your pussy around him. He's shaking just as much as you are. "Cream on this cock, baby. Oh, fuck. Yeah.Just like that. You're gonna make me cum, too. Gonna make me cum so fuckin' hard. All in your pussy. You want that, huh?"

It's as you're desperately whining, cumming all around his thick shaft that Jungkook feels his body lose control. There's a tightness to his balls, and a shudder to his sternum, that he hasn't felt since the last time he was in your bedroom. Last time he was in you, more specifically.

"Kook," you whimper his name, and that's when Jungkook really can't hold back.

"Yeah, babe," he rasps, as his hard thrusts become pathetic stutters. "I'm cumming."

The announcement isn't needed, for you swear you can almost feel it as his thick cum begins to fill you. The lack of a condom makes it all the more primal, the way his body shudders indicative of just how much cum he's filling you up with. 

His body collapses on yours a little, his clammy torso pressed to your back. The dress you're wearing is barely on properly, and the feeling of his skin against yours is catastrophic. As intimate as sex is, it's this right now, the beat of his heart thrumming against your spine that is the real disaster. How you can ever look him in the eye again is beyond you.

But then his lips are pressing chaste kisses to the curve of your neck, and his hands are squeezing at your hips. He doesn't pull out. Keeps himself warm inside you. Says, "How the fuck am I ever supposed to give you up, huh?"

That's the thing.

He isn't supposed to, and you damn well know it.

Reaching back for some tissue to help you out, Jungkook slowly withdraws. Holds his hand beneath your pussy, then replaces it with tissue. Turns you around and lets you take over.

"Here's a radical idea," you offer, not looking at him as you quickly make sure you're decent. Stay standing with your legs crossed, just in case. "Don't."

Pulling his shirt back over his head, Jungkook presses his back to the wall. There's a distance between you, yes, but you don't really feel it, 'cause it's purely physical.

And it's not like it lasts for very long either, 'cause Jungkook decides he needs to kiss you all over again.

"Alright," he whispers against your lips. "Say we don't. Say I wanna be yours. What the fuck do we do now?"

You shrug. The answers aren't yours to decide. It's up to you both.

"Well, firstly I'm gonna text Tae," you hum. "Tell him you're still an asshole and that I need to be let out immediately."

It's been half an hour.

He came to check on things about ten minutes ago.

The music might be loud, but not loud enough to drown out the way you guys fuck. 

Summer had been quiet. In his car, in your empty house, you've never had to keep it down before. Didn't even realise quite how loud you were being.

Which is why Jimin is the one who unlocks the outside bolt with a smirk a few minutes later, Taehyung watching on with a little disgusted grimace a metre or so back.

"Gross," he whisper shouts at you, but then he's smiling, too. Notices how Jungkook touches you—the hand he has on the small of your back, and the way he clasps your hand as you begin to walk ahead of him—and finds it impossible to be mad.

"C'mon," Jimin calls behind himself, leading you up and out of the basement. "We're going to the diner."

"We?" You question, incredibly confused.

"We." He simply says. Doesn't leave it up for debate. Gathers up the rest of the Untouchables (though Claudia is noticeably absent), and tells them the same thing he told you. Drags Taehyung along as well.

Jungkook was scared of integrating you into his life, but there's no other way to do it. Has to rip the band aid off.

As you walk into Montgomery's, hand in hand with the boy who had spent his summer wasting away with you in here, both of you realise that maybe it isn't such a huge deal.

Or at least, you do until Maria clocks you. Eyes darting from you, to Jungkook, and then to your gently clasped hands, she's in a state of absolute shock. Almost drops her tray.

"Sorry, what the fuck?!"

I wuv U 💜

Fandom: BTS

Pairing: Jungkook x Female Reader

💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖

I woke up in the middle of the night by the sound coming from my living room. The culprit was no other than Jungkook, who had been singing karaoke with much pleasure as I could sense from his voice. I checked my phone and found that it was 3 o'clock.

I have a habit of not being able to go back to sleep once I'm awake in the middle of the night. And I'm pretty sure Jungkook was aware of it. Thinking of giving him a good scolding, I walked to the living room only to find the mess he had created.

At least four cans of beer lay all around the floor. He was drinking from his glass very excitedly, his hair completely disheveled. Hearing me enter the room, he looked up and flashed a bunny smile.

Of course, I couldn't bring myself to say anything mean.

"Come here!" he mumbled like a baby.

I dragged myself forward and sat down beside him. Immediately, he hugged me by my neck and placed a soft kiss on my cheek. I could smell beer from his breath.

"What are you doing this late?" I asked.

Jungkook blinked at me innocently, "Did I wake you up, sweetheart?" I pouted and nodded my head sorrowfully to let him know what he did. To which, Jungkook gasped dramatically and clapped his hands to his mouth.

He spoke with remorse, "I'm so sorry, baby. I swear I didn't mean to. I only wanted to have some drinks. And suddenly I felt like singing. I forgot that you were already asleep. What time is it?"

"It's 3 in the morning!" I informed.

"Okay, baby! I'll stop now." He tried to get up but I pulled him back into the couch.

"No. Stay. And sing!" I requested, "for me."

He smiled mischievously and said, "I wuv U." He then turned on the music to sing, while I rested my head on his shoulder and ran my hand through his sexy messy hair.

💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖

Note: I had to write something down since I watched his late night live. Jungkook has no idea what he does to me...

My Masterlist

Careful What You Wish For

Fandom: BTS Pairing: Vampire!Jungkook x Human!Reader (Female) Genre: Fantasy/Angst Warning: Slight swearing, mild horror atmosphere, vampirish activities (please don’t ask me), blood, biting, fighting, wolves and a sprinkle of smut.  Word Count: 4k Words Note: Totally fictional, some parts of the plot is inspired by the classic Dracula. Some people might feel uncomfortable. Please, read at your own risk.

Summary: When you’re stuck in a deserted road surrounded by wilderness, you have no other choice but to enter the huge mansion you see before you. The man you meet inside is mysterious. But he is too alluring for you to stay away from...

*************************************************

“Oh shit!” I swore as an animal passed by in front of my car and I had to break really hard.

It was past midnight and raining heavily. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to reach the destination of my work till dawn. I still had a long way to go.

I tried to start the car again. But it wasn't responding anymore.

"No, no, please," I pleaded to my car, "this is not the right place. For God's sake..." I kept muttering.

I had to give up trying after a few attempts. The car was a second hand one and it didn't function properly. I tried calling for the recovery. But there was no phone signal either.

Being hopeless, I got down from the car and got drenched immediately.

"Yeah, no, SHIT!" I swore in exasperation. I was cursing myself for agreeing to go into this remote area in the first place. I desperately wished for a miracle.

I looked around me. It felt like the road was in the middle of nowhere. All around me, I could see only wilderness. But there was a faint glow of light ahead of me. Without any further ado, I started to walk towards it.

What I found was astonishing and terrifying at the same time. There was a huge mansion. The front gate was wide open as if it was already aware of my intrusion and was welcoming me all the same.

I went inside the boundary, and knocked on the door. Even through the heavy rain, the sound of someone pushing open the door from within was heard clearly. I took a step backward as I look at the person in front of me.

*************************************************

There stood a man in dark clothes. I couldn't see his face properly due to the lack of light.

"Welcome!" He announced without any sign of hesitation, his voice sharp yet not cold.

I tried to explain what had happened in a few sentences before he said, "Perhaps it would be better if you come inside first. I can see you're wet."

I nodded my thanks and went inside despite having some doubts within myself.

He led me through a dark corridor into what looked like a very fancy living room to me. The fire was lit on the fireplace and I was grateful for the warmth.

"If you don't mind waiting here for a moment, love, I have to take care of something." Then, the man was gone.

I found everything really weird. I mean, who talked like that nowadays. His accent and the choices of words were really out of the ordinary.

I noticed that the whole room looked really dark despite being lit up by many candles all around it. I was still sitting by the fire when he came back with a towel and some clothes.

I was about to say it wasn't necessary, that he should not trouble himself with them, when he cut me off and said, "It's not every day a guest come to stay at my place. I'm glad to do anything to make you feel at home. And I apologize early. You might not get full attention since I had sent all the servants away for a week. After all, I was not aware of your arrival."

With that being said, I couldn't argue any further. He again led me to a bedroom and asked me to get changed while he prepare the supper.

The clothes he had given me were all old fashioned. But they were still as new as if no one had ever worn them.

When I came out to the dining room, I was awestricken by the amount of food that were presented before me on the table. The fact that it was done in such a short time by a single person was more fascinating.

The man was sitting on the very corner and called me to sit opposite him. I didn't make any further inquiries as I was starving and the smell was delicious. After having a few bite, I decided to make a conversation.

I found out that the man was called Jeon Jungkook and he was the landlord of the entire mansion. All of his family members had died in a tragic accident leaving him with a huge fortune. He lived alone with some servants to take care of him and the mansion.

As we were talking, I couldn't help but notice how incredibly handsome he was. He had a fine figure. His eyes were almost pitch black and they were huge. He was wearing old fashioned clothes like mine and wore fine silver jewelry. He also had a lot of piercings in his ears, eyebrows and lip.

And Oh God, his lips. As I looked, I couldn't take my eyes off them. I was looking at him in a very devoted way throughout the whole conversation. He was indeed very handsome. In fact, he was the most beautiful person I had ever seen my entire life.

*************************************************

Jungkook had promised to call the recovery for me at dawn (I would call him by his name since he had insisted me upon calling him that). As I lied down, I realized how terribly tired I was. So, I closed my eyes.

"How old is he?" I thought before falling into a deep sleep. He never mentioned his age.

In my dream, I was in a complete different world. There was darkness all around me. The warm room started to get cold as I felt someone coming near. The stranger climbed my bed and lied beside me, his hands slowly reaching to catch both of mine. Suddenly he was on top of me.

“You’re blessed.” He softly whispered on my ear. I could feel his breath going down slowly towards my neck. His lips touched my skin. I felt a sharp pain throughout my whole body.

Then, everything changed. I couldn’t feel the reality anymore. Nothing felt solid. It was as if I was floating through the air. I could see all the colors at once. But then again, there were no colors at all. It felt like every color, matter and surrounding had merged into one. It was a terrific feeling, but a pleasant one too.

“Who are you?” I wanted to ask. But I felt like I already knew the answer. I didn’t want to acknowledge it right away. Because then, I had to come back to the reality; which I didn’t want just then.

I couldn’t tell how long the strange feeling lasted. Slowly my surrounding started to get clearer. Half consciously, I could make out a man’s silhouette raising from my bed. He walked towards the door.

I tried to call out his name. But it seemed like I couldn’t move my muscles. He glanced back at me one last time before making his exit through the door.

*************************************************

I woke up with a jolt and found myself covered with sweat. I was gasping for air as I found it hard to breathe properly. My heart was pounding in my chest. I sat down and tried to relax.

“What time is it?” I thought. It was hard to guess whether it was night or day. I looked around me and saw that my room still looked the same. But I felt like an eternity had passed already.

The windows were covered with heavy thick curtains. So, it was possible that the morning sunlight couldn’t get inside. I slowly rose from my bed and opened one side of a curtain. The scorching heat from the sun reached my face. My eyes closed shut as it couldn’t adjust with the bright light suddenly.

I closed the curtain and went towards my bed again. I was feeling a little weak. There was a dull pain on my neck. I sat down for a while, thinking about last night’s incidents.

Then, suddenly I remembered about my business. I had to be present there before 10 o’clock. I hurriedly got out of bed and sprinted to the living room. Jungkook was sitting on an armchair by the fireplace. Just like my bedroom, all the curtains had blocked out the sunlight here as well.

“Good afternoon, love.” He greeted me with a smile, “did you sleep well?”

“Afternoon?” I gasped, “Oh no!”

“Is there a problem?” he rose from his chair and walked towards me.

I explained that I had an important meeting at 10 and that it was the reason as to why I had come to this place. Now I had already missed it and I didn’t know what to do.

“I’m so sorry, love,” he said, “I didn’t want to wake you up early. I thought you must’ve been very tired since last night’s tragedy.”

I noticed a faint line of smile on his face. It didn’t appear to me that he was sorry at all. In fact, it looked like he was actually glad.

I shook my head. It sounded ridiculous. Why would this man want me to miss the meeting? What was there for him in it?

“As there is nothing you can do about it now, I would suggest you to stay here as long as it takes for your car to be repaired.” Jungkook announced. I didn’t say anything. I was still very confused about everything that was happening.

“You look so pale.” He said, “Come, sit here.” I went over to sit by the fire. He poured a glass of wine and handed it to me.

As I took the glass, our hands touched for a moment and I shivered. His hands were surprisingly cold.

*************************************************

After lunch, Jungkook took me to the library. I was going through the books on the shelves while he sat quietly in a corner. There was a book in his hand. But I could sense that he wasn't reading. He was secretly watching my every move.

I thought about my strange dream. It felt more real than any dream I ever had. But the feelings I felt were too strange to explain in reality. No matter how excited I felt the night before, at day time, I felt like there was an air of melancholy all around the house.

It started to rain again. I inquired about my car. Jungkook told me that it might take a day or two to properly fix it. I asked him if he could give me a ride to the town. He said I would rather enjoy my time in the mansion more.

He spoke with a voice of authority which made me shut up. I couldn't bring myself to argue. Even though I was strongly attracted by his appearance, there was a part of me who was frightened.

Time seemed to move at a different speed here. I tried reading something for a while but kept getting distracted by my own thoughts. It was mostly the memories of last night and those strange feelings.

Casting my fear aside, I thought it would be better to talk to my companion. So, I asked, "It rains an awful lot here, doesn't it?"

Jungkook shut down his book and smiled at me, "Yes, love. It does."

There was something in the way he called me 'love'. It made me blush almost every time. I was swept off for a whole minute by his answer.

He then chuckled to himself and said, "They say, the woods belong to the nine tailed fox that resides in here. After all, he controls the weather."

"He?" I asked, "Isn’t a Gumiho always a woman?"

"Is it, though?" He asked as if he had met a real Gumiho who was a man.

I shrugged my shoulders and added, "He must've been really sad for him to make it rain most of the time."

"Yes, love." Jungkook whispered under his breath, "He’s lonely. Just like I am."

*************************************************

Jungkook apologized and said he couldn’t join me for the dinner as he had some important works to be done. He then left me alone to have mine.

As I was eating alone, all kinds of doubts kept revolting around my head. I never saw him eat. He didn’t even joined me for lunch. But why? And how did he prepared the foods all alone in such a short time? I remembered how cold he was when our hands had touched.

But there was something that bothered me much more. He sounded very sad while telling me about the Gumiho. He sounded as if it were true. Or at least he believed it to be.

“He is lonely.” I thought, “Maybe that’s why he doesn’t want me to leave.”

The feeling of loneliness was something I was very much used to. I had never received any love from my family. They had never admired me or appreciated me for anything. In fact I was always considered a disappointment in my family.

All my life, I had searched desperately for a friend who would understand me and love me for who I was. It was the only wish I had cherished since childhood. So, I decided I would not mention about leaving unless Jungkook, himself, asked me to.

I waited for Jungkook for a while to bid him goodnight. But he didn’t come. I thought he might have already been to bed. So, I made my way towards my bedroom.

As soon as I fell asleep, my dream returned. He was on top of me, whispering in my ear, “I don’t want you to leave.”

But this time, I replied, “I don’t want to leave either.”

“Stay with me, will you?”

“Don’t let me go.” I mumbled as I felt his lips on my neck. Something sharp was pushed through my skin and I felt that quick pain all over my body again.

All the strange feelings of the previous night returned. But this time, everything felt more pleasant as I didn’t resist. I let myself loose.

When I came back to my senses, I could see his face clearly. It was indeed Jungkook. I knew it all along. But instead of shying away or being frightened, I was relieved.

He placed a soft kiss on my lips and whispered, “Sweet dreams, love.”

*************************************************

I woke up next day with the same feeling like the day before. I was sweating and it was hard to breathe. As soon as I tried to stand up, my head felt dizzy.

“Was it a dream too?” I pondered over last night. Whatever it was, the feelings I felt were a little too strong for me to avoid. I wanted to find out the truth. And the only way to do that was meeting Jungkook.

He was sitting by the fire as usual and looked up with a warm smile on his lips, “You’re awake.”

I slowly nodded and sat down on the armchair opposite him. “What time is it?” I asked.

“The same time you woke up yesterday, I believe.” He said casually. His expression turned serious as he looked at me closely, “Are you feeling well, love?”

I didn’t know whether to tell him the truth. What if it was really a dream? He would think I was mentally unstable. At that point, I was questioning my own sanity as well.

“I feel…” I hesitated before saying, “I’m fine.” Jungkook nodded. But he looked like he didn’t believe it.

“I’m glad that it’s not raining today.” I said, “Maybe, we can go out? Take a walk?”

“No.” Jungkook said sharply, a sudden terror reflected in his eyes. Then, he turned to me and his expression turned soft, “I don’t think you’re quite fit for the job presently, love.”

Then, he left to prepare my lunch. Just like the day before, I had to have lunch alone. But this time, he sat beside me while I eat, looking at me with somewhat fondness.

“Aren’t you going to eat?” I asked.

“I already had mine.” He said.

I was still questioning his behaviors. He was being such a gentleman, taking care of me all alone without any help. Giving me a place to stay when I needed it the most. But there was still a little bit of suspicion I couldn’t get rid of.

I felt weaker than I did the day before. I kept sitting most of the time. Jungkook offered to read me a poetry. I found his voice much more soothing than the poem itself. He could be reading the worst poem ever written in history. But I would still enjoy it as much.

When Jungkook left me to prepare the dinner table, I was walking around to explore some more territory by myself. But the more I walked, the dizzier my head got. At a point, my knees gave up and I started to fall.

But before I could actually touch the ground, Jungkook was already by my side, holding me firmly on his arms. I could see his face from up close. He was genuinely worried about me.

“Love,” he called softly.

I nodded to let him know that I was still conscious. He lifted me up in a bridal style and carried me towards my bedroom. I looked at him earnestly. I needed to ask it or I wouldn’t be able to rest.

“Was it you?” I whispered, “Or was it a dream?”

Jungkook put me to bed slowly. Then, he looked me in the eyes and said, “It was me, alright. But so was your dream.”

*************************************************

I woke up in the middle of the night. I felt better than before. I looked around searching for Jungkook. But there was no one in my bedroom.

“Why wouldn’t he come tonight?” I thought, “Was he worried about my health?” Whatever he was doing to me, I could feel it was making me weak. But I still wouldn’t want it to stop.

I walked out of my room. He was nowhere to be seen, not in the living room nor in the library. I walked towards the direction I believed was his bedroom. He wasn’t there either. At that time, I heard the sound of the front gate opening.

I thought he might have went out. So, I followed the previous route I took to get inside and was already in front of the main door. It was wide open. This time I was sure he had gone out.

“But why at this time?” I thought. Hesitantly I went out to check the matter myself. It was a moonlit night. So, there was enough light to see through the woods. I walked around for a while when the howling of the wolves started.

I got scared. But I had already walked a long way from the mansion. I sped up and started to head back. The noises kept coming nearer. I started to run. But the wolves seemed to be just beside me. As I glanced sideways, I saw a wolf jumping right at me.

I fell down, eyes closed and heart beating up to my throat. But the wolf hadn’t touch me. As I looked up, I saw Jungkook. He was standing in between me and the pack of wolves. I couldn’t see his face properly since his back was towards me.

Then, with a hissing sound, he leapt towards the wolves. All the wolves were jumping at him one at a time. But he was invincible. He was dodging almost every attack from the wolves.

I couldn’t make out most of the fight. There was chaos all around. I couldn’t even move a muscle in fear. One of the wolves bit Jungkook on his neck and he screamed in pain. I got up to go near him. But at that moment, what I saw scared me to death.

I looked at Jungkook in disbelief. His face bore the expression of a wild beast. His eyes were scarlet and glowing in the moonlight. Blood was dripping from his mouth.

Our eyes met for a moment. He seemed to have seen the fear in my eyes. I took a step back. His face softened. He tried to walk towards me, mouthing the word, ‘love’.

I turned back and ran.

*************************************************

I ran until I couldn’t anymore. I didn’t know where I was going. As I ran, all the memories from the mansion kept replaying in my head.

I never saw Jungkook eat or rest. He was terrified at the idea of going out. All of his room had thick curtains and they blocked the sunlight. His red eyes, his wild expression, the blood in his mouth…

I eventually lost consciousness and fell down on the ground. When I woke up again I was back at the mansion. I was lying on my bed while Jungkook sat at the very corner, looking at me.

I sat up quickly. His face was back to normal again. But I still couldn’t shake off the fear.

“Welcome back, love.” he said. “Are you okay?”

I didn’t answer. I looked out of the window where the curtains were drawn back. The moon was huge tonight.

Jungkook’s voice sounded very serious when he said, “You don’t have to be scared. The wolves won’t bother you anymore.”

I slowly nodded. I didn’t know whom I was more scared of, the wolves or my savior himself.

“Your car had been repaired.” He announced.

Then, he did something quite unexpected. He came to sit closer to me and took both of my hands in his. He looked me in the eyes and said, “You are free to go, love.”

“What have you done to me?” I was in tears.

“I know I have hurt you.” He whispered, “But trust me, I did it because I had no other choice.”

I started to sob. In between all of this mess, there was a kind of comfort I thought I had found. But my hope of an eternity together with this stranger I started to care about, was hanging by a thread.

“I’m so sorry that at some point, I started to care for you. It could have ended easily if I didn’t.” he said. I looked at his eyes. They were full of sorrow and regret.

“What are you?” I asked finally.

“I think you already know that, love.”

*************************************************

I stayed awake in my bed. It had been a while since Jungkook left. I couldn’t sleep. The thought of leaving this mansion for good had surrounded me. I was in despair.

I didn’t know for sure how Jungkook was feeling. But he had said he started to care about me even if it was not supposed to have happened. I didn’t know about my own feeling as well. All I knew was that even if it wasn’t love, I was madly craving for him. What could it be? Desire, lust or infatuation?

Love was a complete foreign idea to me. All my life, I had only needs and wants. And I did everything to have them. Now I felt I needed Jungkook. I needed him to care for me. I needed him to make me feel at home. I needed him to do whatever it was that he did.

I had made up my mind. I went to his room. He was sitting up with a book in his hand. He looked at me in confusion.

“I thought I made it clear.” Jungkook said, “You can leave tomorrow.”

“What if I refuse?” I asked. Jungkook’s eyes opened wide. He looked as if he never expected that answer.

“You told me earlier that I was free to go. Does that also mean that I’m free to stay as well?” I asked again.

He shook his head, “I don’t think you understand, love. It’s dangerous. We are two very different things. You can’t live with me.”

“I know,” I said and climbed on to his bed, “Make me just like you.”

“Love!” he whispered, looking hurt by my words.

“I understand how you’re feeling about it. But let me tell you something honestly about me.” I moved closer and took his hands on mine like he had done earlier.

Then, I said all the things I had always wanted to tell a friend, someone who would understand me, someone who would care. Jungkook was the closest I ever had to a friend.

“I don’t have anyone or anything to return to.” I finished by asking him, “Will you accept me to be a part of your world?”

Jungkook chuckled, “I think I should be the one asking you that.” Then, his eyes lit up. It turned bright red as he came closer to whisper in my ear, “So, will you be my bride for an eternity, love?”

*************************************************

Special 8 Photo-folio Masterlist

My Personal Masterlist

Almost

Fandom: BTS Pairing: Jungkook x OC (Jessie) Genre: Angst and a little bit of fluff Warning: Possessive behavior, underage drinking, heartbreak etc. Word Count: 1.8k words

‘Almost’, the most depressing word in my dictionary. If you want to know the reason behind it, we’ll have to go back in time.

Our grade 1 teacher had suggested to fix our seats alphabetically. That didn’t sound bad to me. Because Jungkook and I were the only students with the initial J for our names. Or at least that was what I thought.

“Jessie” my teacher called me to seat at the very back of the first row. I smiled at Jungkook and went over to take my seat.

“John” the teacher called next.

“Who the hell is John?” I thought while the new boy in our class came to sit beside me.

“Now Jungkook would sit at the very front of the second row” the teacher announced.

Jungkook went to his assigned seat and looked back for a moment to catch my eyes. It was a signal for me to persuade the teacher to let us sit together.

I knew I had to do it. Because Jungkook would rather die than argue with the teacher on any matter. I, on the other hand, searched for every single chance to contradict my teachers. It was something I found really amusing.

As soon as I put forward my request, our teacher replied with, “Who would complain on such a peaceful organization of the seats other than you?”

The other students started to laugh. As much as I can recall, we had some minutes of argument when finally the teacher said, “Alright! Let’s ask Jungkook on what he has to say about it.”

Then he turned to Jungkook and asked, “Do you want to go over to the back to sit with her? Or are you happy with my decision?”

Jungkook nodded his head and said, “I’m fine, here” like a complete idiot.

I remembered how his reply had hurt my pride and since then I had never sat beside him in any class, not even when we had gone to the high school. We were almost going to sit together for a whole year and more to come. But no!

None of us would introduce the other as the best friend. Nonetheless we had the closest bond than any best friends’ duo of our class. In fact, we were more than friends. We knew it and so did everyone else.

Some people couldn’t understand how we ended up together while others would say, “opposite attracts.”

We were totally opposite in terms of our personalities. I was wild, adventurous and free-spirited while Jungkook was shy, introverted and conserved. But these were merely what appeared on the outside. I believed him to be more like me spiritually. He just had been taming the animal within himself.

Perhaps I was the only one who could see that. Whatever it was, nobody would deny the fact that we were surely an unusual couple.

The next incident also happened at the farewell party of our Elementary School. I was talking with a bunch of boys and joking around.

I knew Jungkook would not join us since he didn't like the crowds. So I didn't bother calling him either.

The party was over and we were walking home together. Suddenly he said, "I didn't like seeing you there." he paused for a moment and added, "With THEM."

I laughed, "What are you talking about?"

"You know exactly what I am talking about"

"Okay, I understand." I said. "You were probably lonely in there. But hey! We are going to the same High School. But some of the boys are leaving the town. I will get to meet you anytime I want. But not them."

"Whatever!" Jungkook sighed in exasperation.

"Why are you making such a huge deal out of it?"

"Because, I don't want to share you with anyone."

"Why?" I asked, rather shocked.

"Because you're my..." Then he abruptly stopped.

I stopped walking. "What?" I urged him to continue.

Jungkook went red on the face but didn't say anything further.

"For God's sake, Jungkook, just say it." I wished to myself.

"Let's hurry!" He said, "We’re already late."

And that was it. Jungkook almost called me his girlfriend. If only he really did, I would have gladly accepted that. Perhaps then, our relationship could have gotten a tag.

We were only 13 back then. I had sneaked a bottle of whiskey from the kitchen cabinet where my father usually kept them. I was always curious about adult drinking that I wanted to try it myself. But doing something this big alone didn’t sound exciting at all.

Of course, I had told Jungkook earlier to sneak out of his house at midnight to meet me at the little junkyard. Reluctantly he had agreed. He actually showed up even though I doubted that he would.

“Guess what I have with me?” I asked him.

“Umm…” he went on to his usual loading mood.

I didn’t have any patience left so I showed him the bottle right away. Jungkook gasped as soon as he saw it. His reaction made me feel more proud of myself for accomplishing the task.

Jungkook tried to persuade me not to drink it. But it was hopeless as I was too determined. As soon as I sipped directly from the bottle I spited it out.

“Yuck!” I shouted, “How can people enjoy drinking this thing?”

Jungkook started to giggle at my reaction. I wasn’t feeling confident anymore. I had to try something else to prove that I was braver than him.

“Stop laughing!” I said boldly, “as if you’ve ever done anything fun in your life before.”

“You didn’t do anything to boast about either.” He said as a matter of fact. "You’re all talk.”

“Who said that? I’ve done quite a lot of things.”

“Like?” he was mocking me at that point.

I quickly tried to make up a lie to get away from the embarrassing situation, “Like I already had my first kiss?”

“What?”

The shock on his face was satisfying. So, I continued, “Yeah, of course, dummy.”

Jungkook frowned and asked, “Who was it?”

“Why would I tell YOU?” I started to tease him now, “I bet you have no idea about these stuffs anyway.”

“I don’t believe you.” He said.

I walked closer to him and said, “Why? Do you want me to prove it?” Jungkook took a step back and I started to laugh.

“I know about these stuffs as much as you do, okay?” he tried to argue.

“Then prove it.” I said in a very serious voice.

Jungkook remained quiet. I slowly walked toward him. He took two steps back causing him to be pinned to the nearby broken car. I rested one of my hand on the car to his left.

Through the moonlight, in the otherwise dark night, I could see Jungkook’s face clearly now. He had shut his eyes closed. I leaned to close the distance between our faces. Our chests were already touching and I could feel his heart beating fast. His trembling lips were parted a little.

I was almost within the reach to feel his breath on my lips, when I realized, he might be frightened. And I moved away. Jungkook opened his eyes and looked at me in confusion.

“I lied,” I said, “I never kissed anyone before.”

I’d had enough. I wanted to get rid of this unestablished relationship I was in with Jungkook. I finally decided I would ask him to be my boyfriend. I had even saved enough money to buy him a nice watch once we were official.

“I have something to tell you.” I said as soon as we met.

“Me too.” Jungkook replied.

“Okay, I'll let you go first.” I was shocked at his calm voice, “Mine can wait.”

Jungkook bent his head down and he said, “I've got accepted.”

“What?”

“You remember about the audition, right?”

“Oh yeah, right!” I said, remembering, “The audition. So, what now?”

“They had called me to sign the contract and go stay in Seoul.”

I didn't know what to say. I never really thought about what was going to happen if he got accepted by the company.

I asked hopefully, “But you'll come back again right?”

Jungkook was too quiet. Something felt wrong. That time, I knew it was the end. He was never coming back to me. A new life awaited him. How could I stop him now?

I smiled, "I knew you would do well."

“But I don't want to go away.”

I could see tears were forming in his eyes. My own tears threatened me to burst out at any time. I still managed to hold it back and said, “What are you talking about? It's a life changing opportunity.”

Jungkook wiped away the tear that just fell from one of his eyes. He slowly nodded his head. He understood.

“Jessie!” he called.

“Hmm?”

“Didn't you want to say something earlier?” he asked.

“Yeah.” I said, “I want to buy you a watch. Consider it as a goodbye gift.”

That’s how our story ended with yet another almost. It could have gone differently. If only I could bring myself to ask him to be mine, could he refuse? Didn't he loved me enough to leave behind everything to be with me? Apparently I never found out.

It had been ten long years. By the time, I had witnessed Jungkook growing up little by little on screen. I had been his number one fan since day one. He along with his group had gone so far now.

I was really grateful to all of his hyungs, who had been there for Jungkook all these years. They had made him who he was today. They had helped him to grow and come out of his shell. I was more than just proud of him.

My life had been different than what I had imagined it would be like. Nonetheless I was doing okay. However, one day, something really unexpected occur.

I saw Jungkook for the first time in ten years. He had come to the store I work in to buy his all-time favorite banana milkshake. He was wearing a cap to hide his face, so that no one could recognize him at a first glance. But how could I not? He was my first, if not last, love.

I was a little shocked when he put the milkshake in front of the counter. Our eyes met for a split second. Jungkook quickly looked away and handed me the cash and said, “Keep the change.” Then, he was gone.

He didn’t recognize me. I doubted he would have. I had shorter hair than him, too many piercings on my ears and nose, tattoos on my arms, neck and even face.

Life almost gave me a chance to be reunited with my Jungkook, only to snatch that hope away in the end.

My Masterlist

Take it All In

Pairing: Vampire JeonJungkook X human Fmc

Warning: mention of blood, making out, dead body.

●○●○●○●○

Eyes, I felt piercing black eyes on me the entire evening, when I entered the ball room, when I was talking to my friends, when I was dancing with other men present there.

Those eyes belonged to the mysterious man who lives in our town. His name is Jeon jungkook. He is young and unmarried, living alone, no one goes near his house because it creeps them out, even me. Still the women soon over him from afar. Its rare he comes outside but today seems to be a special occasion that he came out.

He is sitting there like a king and is sipping blood red wine, staring deep into my soul.

I dont know why he is looking at me like that so I decided to approach him. Lifting my ball gown a little to allow myself to walk I made my way towards him. As soon as I reached him chills ran down my spine, his gaze made me weak in the knees, he looks at me like he wants to devour me but I muster up my courage and question him

"You keep looking at me Sir Jeon would you perhaps like to have a dance with me?"

" I see you have a keen eye, sure why not" He responds and gets up from his chair. His appearance is no joke. He is dressed in a neat elegant black suit with black shoes, his black hair neatly styled leaving just a strand to fall on his forehead. He is lean and tall with piercing brown eyes . He looks like a King ready to reign his kingdom. He offers me his hand and leads me to the stage where people are dancing. His hands are big and envelope my small hands, they are soft but surprisingly very cold. The music starts and his one hand wraps my waist and pulls me closer to him making me bump in to his chest. I look into his brown eyes which makes my heart go crazy and my stomach filled with butterflies. As we start dancing everyone in my vicinity started to fade away and I could only look into his eyes, his face with sharp jawline and his pink lips ,he looked even more handsome and ethereal up close. I could fell the tension growing between us but chose to ignore it and started a conversation.

"So tell me Mr Jeon  what do you do for living?"

He chuckled and replied "curious now are we?"

"Well everyone in this town thinks you are mysterious"

"Do you not agree to that?" He questioned

"No, I think they are right, you are mysterious but I want to get to know you"

"hmm intresting, what do you want to know miss _____" He asked.

"For starters, answer the question I asked, what do you do for living?"

"Let's see I am a business man."

" Nice, how old are you Mr Jeon?"

He chuckled at the questions, "Too old for you miss _____" He said with sinister smile which sent chill down my spine. I decided stop and we continued dancing, we danced together for three songs and I was growing tired, Jungkook noticed it and spoke "why dont we take a break? Go somewhere secluded?"

"Oh okay sure, lets go" I replied and he led me away from there. I didnt really get what he meant by that question or maybe I did and I chose to ignore it but a bubble of unknown excitement was building in my stomach.

Soon we reached a place, it looks like a barn with all the hay inside it. He leads me inside and closed the door. I was about to speak when out of no where I felt his lips on mine. They tasted like honey, sweet and soft. I was too stunned to respond so he bit my lip which made me open my mouth and let him explore every inch of me and I couldn't resist and started kissing him back, I was no match for his pace.

Soon he started attacking my neck,  leaving pecks and nibbles on my skin. A moan left my mouth "ah jungkook" and he started leaving hickeys all over my neck and was biting me.

He kept biting and biting so hard that drew blood from my soft porcelain skin, it hurt I started shouting his name but no avail. He wouldn't listen to me and kept sucking on my blood like a monster hungry for blood. Maybe that what he is, a monster disguised as a human being hunting for blood and killing humans, A vampire

He kept drinking my blood and didnt stop until he drank every drop of it,  he dropped me on the floor and bent down amd spoke

"You were the tastiest blood I ever drank ______ , thanks for the meal, I will remember you or maybe not." He said smiling like a maniac and left me there to die.