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hmmmmmmm...! temple kisses + xiao if thats okay?
pairing: xiao x gn!reader cw: major character death (AGAIN)! xiao is injured this time. mentions of blood n death and stuff idk
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every time xiao leaves, he presses a kiss to your temple beforehand. the featherlight touch of his hand can be felt on the other side of your head as he gently holds you in place while his lips brush against the intimate area. when you had asked him why he always did, xiao had flushed and looked away. a gesture of good luck. a promise to return.
which is why, as you run in the rain beside the ex-archon who arrived to your doorstep already drenched by the water, you curse yourself for not demanding a kiss before xiao left earlier this morning. you knew his duties to protect liyue were dangerous, yet he had survived thousands of years. never once had you thought that you would outlive him.
zhongli guides you to xiao's location, immediately asking if there's anything he can do to help. yet, you simply fall to your knees in the mud besides xiao. there's too much blood. golden ichor drains from his body. you had never stopped to consider that xiao consisted of anything but the red concoction that circles throughout the human body, yet here you are, finding out that your lover bleeds the same color as his eyes. it is a horrendous sight. gold stains the whites and greens of his uniform, sullying the mud and grass below with watered-down cor lapis hues.
gold, you realize in this very moment, is the worst color to have ever been invented.
"hello, crystalfly," xiao croaks as you kneel down next to him. you're unsure if you're crying as water pours over your face from above. "you shouldn't see me like this."
even in his battered state, xiao can still find it in himself to lecture you. you want to laugh. you want to scream. you want to lay down next to him and rot away in this putrid weather with him.
for all of his years of undying duty, of managing his karmic debt, of suffering, xiao deserved no less than to die under a beautiful blue sky, surrounded by those he loves. yet, now he will only die in the presence of a single mortal and the former god who forsook him only a few years prior under a treacherous sky that shows no forgiveness. no forgiveness for a sinner like xiao, even if he's spent hundreds of years in an attempt to repent. the universe is cruel. the only time he was able to experience heaven was by your side and now, you can't even provide him with the sustenance to carry onwards.
you can't find it in yourself to beg him to stay. to plead for him to be by your side is a desire crafted purely of selfishness. the nightmares that plague him, the fatigue that never seems to leave his bones, and the eternal loneliness in his eyes all seem to scream about how xiao's time on this earth has long since expired. you? you are only a distraction from the pain.
xiao's hand gently cups your face as he looks up at you. he looks at you as if you are celestia itself, as if you are the weaver of the night sky who crafted all of the beautiful, far away galaxies and stars that he's memorized over his lonesome nights, and as if you are salvation. you provide no salvation. you can only provide him with company as he departs this world. so, you swallow your sadness and manage a shaky smile.
"hi, sweetheart," you greet, lifting his hand and placing a weak kiss to his knuckles. "you look beautiful, even in the rain."
xiao smiles. his eyelids are heavy.
"i am tired," he confesses.
you both understand what this means.
"are you nervous?" you blurt and xiao shakes his head.
"my duty has been fulfilled. it is time to reunite with old friends," xiao states solemnly. "i love you."
the three little words the yaksha scarcely says. over the roar of thunder, you do your best to memorize the intonation of his words as they fall from his lips. you want to beg for him to repeat them, yet you know that you should not taint your final moments with him.
"i love you too," you murmur, before leaning down and placing a kiss to his temple. you swallow a sob that threatens to erupt from your throat. xiao glances at you with lazy eyes as you move to brush his hair out of his face. "safe travels, my love."
xiao's smile returns to his face as he feels your lips on his wet skin. he closes his eyes.
they do not reopen.