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I remember when I could run my fingers through my hair
And end up with a concerning amount of hair in my hand
Luckily I have thick hair so it wasn’t noticeable
I didn’t have much control
Over my body and what it was doing
And I felt frustrated over my hair
It turns out that when your body is worried about survival
It will neglect your hair and fingernails
I find it ironic that those two things will appear to grow after you’re dead
Anyways, I remember getting chubby cheeks
From steroids
And I felt ugly for not knowing who I was at 13
Then I grew my hair out really long
Since it seemed like the longer your hair was,
The cooler you were when it came to the strange rules of the popularity of high school girls
I grew my hair and started to feel as if I could hide behind it
As if I could hide my depression behind it and act like it didn’t exist
But I also remember how heavy with water it would get when I showered
So I had the idea of cutting it
Short
And decided to write my own rules for the popularity of misfits
And now my hair is getting longer
In a way I like it and in another I hate it
But what does a girl’s hair mean anyway?