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k. ayato x gn!reader.
genre: angst.
Tw: reader’s death, regret, swearing, just Ayato being mean :(
my first time making a fanfic and write stuff so, enjoy!
also my grammar is a bit off.. so sorry about that.
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you loved him. you really do. But be as it may, it doesn’t change the fact that he doesn’t have time for you. Today is the 3rd time this week you had asking him to atleast spends some time with you, but ofcourse, you had been back at this damned room, your shared room. “Ayato… please, honey you shouldn’t do this to yourself.. you’re hurting.” said you, so full of concern for his well-being. “I’ve said this countless time [name]. STOP BOTHERING ME.” woah, this is new, he has NEVER raise his voice at you, shocked at his reply, you get out of his office, broken hearted. “[name]…? i’ve heard everything.. im sorry..” Thoma says while pats your head, comfortingly. You could only stare at your hands, dumbfounded at your ‘soon to be husband’. You only wanted Ayato to talk about your recent sickness, you got cancer. “It’s alright, Thoma, really thank you for always being there for me” Thoma smiles down at you, “anytime.”.
your sickness got worse on these pass couple of weeks. you couldn’t walk anymore. Ayaka stood beside you, feeding you while her brother still doesn’t know about any of this, “[name], we should really tell about your condition to Ayato” face full of concern while fidgeting her dress. “Really, it’s okay Ayaka, he wanted some alone time” You reply to her statements half-heartedly. You can’t stand him anymore, all of his bullshits, you’re so tired of his childish silly actions. Tears threaten to fall from your eyes, all you wanted was him to finally lay beside you, sharing your sweet-nothings to eachothers, and maybe even go out on some little harmless dates, actually, when was the last time he had taken you to dates? you couldn’t remember. You felt as your body began to ache- so bad that you almost screamed. It hurts, physically and mentally, you’re not ready to leave this world, you haven’t fulfill your wishes yet. “[NAME]!!! WHATS WRONG?!?!” Ayaka, your best friend, your fiancè’s beloved sister. “Aya… please, don’t tell him about this.. AGH… it.. hurts..” Tears started to fall on her crystal blue eyes, it hits your face like a rock falling to the ground. “Shhh… don’t cry, its all going to be alright.., i want you to tell him how much i loved him..” you smiled at her, for the last time.
A week has passed after that incident, the estate has a depressing aura surrounding it, even the fatui near the estate are concerned about what happened. Fortunately(or rather… unfortunately), Ayato has begin to notice this, how when you hadn’t come up to his office to “bother him”, how everytime when Thoma sees him his face falls into a saddened one, and how..how he has suddenly felt… troubled..? why does his heart picked up when he’s near your shared room..? everyone in the estate is so.. depressed, as if someone has passed. He connected all the dots and… no. There’s no way. He refused to believe that. And there he came searching around the estate, looking, searching, YEARNING, for any traces you left behind. Hell, he even goes out to Inazuma city to ask about everyone if they have seen you, but all of that comes to a waste. No traces was found, he’s stressed. Had you gone to another island? or even region? why doesn’t you tell him anything? do you… hate him..? He grips his Sumi(a japannese calligraphy pen or some sorts), it almost break because of how much power he used. “Godammit [name]. Where could have you been..?” all of the regrets, its all coming to him, it feels like a burden behind his back, guilty. He hated the fact that he had yelled at you, when he swore on his life he would never yell at you. He asked one of the guards regarding your presence, but all of the guards said that they cannot tell him, its not that they want to, but its an order. From a certain someone, someone he cherishes, he loved, he worships. He’s getting enough of this, “Ayaka!” his smooth voice rangs around the estate, Ayaka, who was practicing her swordmanship rushes to her brothers office, “Yes brother?” she asks him while also being nervous. “Where is [name]?”
Tears streaming down his face. How could.. how could you..?!?! you left him. In this world behind, alone, well not really but he doesn’t care. Why hasn’t anyone told him about your passing?? once he opened the letter that you write from him before you’re gone, he’s so, so heart brokened.
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To my dearest, Ayato.
Hello, dear. It seems that Ayaka has given you this letter i wrote days, weeks, or even months prior. Yes, i’ve probably am already gone from this beautiful world, im sure you’ve probably felt guilty about it. Don’t worry, i’ve forgiven you, so don’t think about it that much… just.. be happy for me alright..? I love you.
Full of love, yours only.
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thanks for reading, this is so shit, im so sorry