I Can Accept That Being Lovable Doesn’t Mean Everyone Will Love Me. It Hurts. That Is A Normal Human

I’m so normal to the point I wanna get drugged up and have my brains fucked out <3<3<3

Why can’t you just fucking suffer for once in your stupid fucking life why do I have to suffer what you’ve done to me why can’t you understand how fucked up you are

Despite it all, I still find you beautiful.

I have acceptance and love for you. I don’t want you in my life again, but I cannot erase the memories we shared. There were plenty of pleasant ones, and plenty of terrible ones. I appreciate both, because I was taught a lesson to respect myself more.

I don’t know why I fell so hard for you, but im not complaining. Despite everything, the pain you put me through, every single awful thing I’ve experienced, I still hold you dear in my heart.

I’m not trying to be delusional and wish for you back, or want you to come back and we can be together again. I am not saying I miss your romantically or sexually or anything else. I am saying that our time together was special to me, and I don’t think that’ll be something that ever goes away, and that’s okay. I am lucky to have been the one to go through all of that instead of someone else who couldn’t have handled it.

I’m glad that I have helped you. I am glad that we had time together. I’m sorry it ended the way it did, but im glad it’s over. Thank you, and im sorry

Have you ever thought that the reason those people you thought were “ride-or dies” or “day 1s” fall out with you because you’re the problem? Have you ever fucking taken accountability in your stupid fucking life ever? Absolutely not, you’re just an innocent esoteric victim who just has so much love for the world right. Fucking lol.

Maybe you deserve to lose those friends. You Definitely lost me. I enjoy leading You on though because I think you deserve a false sense of security and maybe one day I could just crush you. I don’t Know about that either honestly, if you were caught on fire I wouldn’t even piss on you. I’d enjoy the show.

It really is all your fault. If anyone is the weird one it’s you. Maybe get a personality besides a poor esoteric mysterious shithead and maybe people could actually tolerate you instead of pretending to tolerate you. I’m glad you know I’ve distanced away, but don’t you dare blame it on me. Maybe if you were actually likable and not an annoying cunt people would genuinely like you instead of pretending to care about you. Let’s face it: nobody ACTUALLY likes you. But I don’t know what people would want out of someone as worthless as you, either.

Do the world a favor.

Somebody please fucking help me I can’t take this anymore

Why can’t I reverse time why did I turn out this way

I hate this so much I just wish I was fucking normal I feel guilt and shame and embarrassment. And fucking stupid. I’m so fucking stupid. I am so goddamn dumb im a fucking home im so paranoid and feel so fucking awful

I’m going to account to nothing my prime is up now I’m the ugliest fucking tranny in the entire world not even my own family or boyfriend or best friends see me as a male they’re just pretending Lol I can’t even blame them who fucking looks at me and says I’m a male I’m actually a fucking traumatized raped girl who’s sexual assault made them Fucking trans Oh my fod Lol I’m such a fucking stupid retard I Actually need to kill myself no wonder I was a fucking accident if I wasn’t an accident then my life wouldn’t be going this way but if fucking course God needed a FUCKINGN Jester Clown to laugh at and mock I am worse than fucking Lucifer I am Lucifer I am the fallen Angel from Heaven and that’s why God is being so fucking cruel to me I am Satan and I am getting ounishedplease god rip him out of me I don’t want to be the Devil anymore I want to be okay again and happy butiruin everything I swear Please God Jesus Or whoever If you’re listening please fucking kill me Please kill me I will pray I will worship I will go to church Wednesday and Sunday and Every OTHER FUCKING DAY oh my fod I’ll give up everything if it means Lucifer can get out of my body or if you just fucking Kill me Olease god I’m directly talking to you please listen to me please stop doing this I’m not strong I’m not a soldier I am a fucking weakling Human please stop doing this to me please it hurtsosb ad I will literally give up everything if it means that I can not be this way anymore please just fucking stop or kill me please Fucking Kill me or stop . Imso fucking sick of being like this please kill me. Please fucking kill me please just find a way to kill me I don’t want to do it myself I don’t want to hurt other people but since I already fucking do I might as well have everyone in this fucking house hear the gun go off and hear my bloodpainthee walls oh my god Olease just stop this I can’t be like this anymore I just want to be fucking Normal I want to be Hapoy I want to be aokay again I don’t want to be a fucking depressed worthless sack of shit oh my god please fucking kill me god kill me god fucking kill me god please god please Jesus fucking Kill me

Please fucking Kill memplease fucking Kill me I can’t take living like this anymore I’m shaky my heart hurts my ear is fucked up im sweating I feel nauseous fucking Kill me please make me have a fucking heart attack right now and kill me please fucking Kill me I want to scream it from my lungs oleasefucking kill me please god F stop fucking soiingthis go me please kill me

“I’m sorry, my baby, for letting you down on so many occasions”

“I only wished I had more time with you, and that I not wasted so much of the time I did have”

“I hope and pray I see you soon, my baby, like I always do”

I am so fucking worthless when will this end