NERD!!! *steel Pushes You Into A Locker*

Lines from the Words of Radiance chasm sequence that made me think I was reading a bodice ripper romance ahem different genre:

They range in intensity from "yeah that belongs in a romance" to "out of context that sentence would not be safe for work" to "I cannot believe Sanderson wrote that"

She looked disheveled, her blue dress scuffed and her hair a mess

He stared into her eyes. So intense. She felt a shiver meeting that expression. This was a man of passion.

She stumbled toward him in the darkness

She turned back to him, then looked down. Inadvertently, he’d grabbed her by the safehand. He let go immediately.

I doubt you’d look good in the traditional short trousers and open vest. Or, rather, you’d probably look too good. It might be a little distracting for the other bridgemen.

“Storms,” Kaladin said. “You’re not drawing a picture of you wearing one of those outfits . . .”

“Yes, of course,” she said. “I’m drawing salacious pictures of myself for you after only a few hours together in the chasm.” She scratched at a line. “You have quite the imagination, bridgeboy.”

She sat up and stretched sore limbs, checking to make sure her sleeve hadn’t come unbuttoned in the night or anything equally embarrassing.

She blushed deeply.

There was a sort of rugged handsomeness to the fellow. Like the beauty of a natural rock formation

But Kaladin’s intensity, that frightened her.

This bridgeman was proving himself different. The way he watched her, the way he thought.

Perhaps she should spend as much time wondering about this man’s motives as he apparently fretted about hers.

Why did he lose control when talking with her?

She sat back on her knees, holding up her sketch. She brushed aside an unruly lock of red hair.

Well, onward, then.” She took a deep breath. “Through soreness and exhaustion we go. You wouldn’t be willing to carry me a little ways . . .” He glared at her. She shrugged with a smile. “Think how grand it would be! I could even get a reed to whip you with.

"when we get out, everyone will cheer me for being a hero for rescuing you.” “Better,” Shallan said. “Except for the fact that I do believe that I am the one rescuing you.”

Shallan smiled, and they continued on, keeping a brisk pace. “I am glad we’re down here,” she said, “because by now, Adolin will be worried sick about me—so when we get back, he’ll be ecstatic. He might even let me kiss him in public.” Adolin. Right. That dampened his mood.

He whipped Shallan in front of him and thrust her into a fissure in the wall.

The chasm fell silent. Kaladin could hear only Shallan’s panting and his own heartbeat.

Slowly, Kaladin twisted about, putting his back to Shallan. She held him from behind, and he could feel her tremble. Stormfather. He trembled himself.

He was suddenly aware of her pressed against his back. Holding him, breath warm on his neck. She trembled, and he thought he could hear in her voice both terror and fascination at their situation.

He clung to Shallan, but their wet hands started to slip.

Kaladin pulled against the wall of the alcove, his injured leg smarting like nothing else, Shallan clinging to him. She was a warmth in his arms, and he held to her as much as she did him

He continued on, talking of his days as a slave, of his attempts to escape. Of the men he’d gotten killed for trusting him. It gushed from him, a story he’d never told.

When he finished, they both let the silence settle on them, and shared warmth. (This makes it on the list for what it sounds like, but even more importantly it comes from a place of emotional intimacy after he bared his soul to her)

Kaladin looked toward her. In a flash of light, he saw her eyes as she looked up from where her head had been resting against his chest, beads of water on her eyelashes. With his hands around her waist, hers around him, it was as close as he’d held a woman since Tarah.

“And so,” she continued, pressing her head back against his chest

For now, he wanted to think—though he was still glad for her presence. And aware of it in more ways than one, pushed against him and wearing the wet, increasingly tattered dress.

He shifted to move to climb down, but realized that Shallan, curled up against him, had fallen asleep.

This list is incomplete because at least half of the lines in the chasm sequence are open flirting and also I didn't include all of the mentions of Shallan’s dress tearing (or of her removing parts of it to make bandages). And all the blushing.

Kaladin, to Lirin: so I asked about the - yes, I'm alive, stop screaming - so I asked about the whole wisdom of the heralds thing and get this, Palah says there are these tiny invisible creatures - no they're not rotspren, they're way smaller than rotspren, but they are what attracts rotspren. I know right? Mindblowing

Was reading on the beach when I hit the big reveal; truly next level Truman Show shit, except the actors had their memories altered? Diabolical.

Am devastated, may never recover. ~60 pages left, saving them for tomorrow.

I thought Liyun was the true villain the whole time and well… I was half right.

Prediction: Painter will paint Yumi to return her to her herself and they live happily ever after. I will accept no other outcome.

@easily-spooked got to That part of Yumi today

Notable exception to this pattern - Gavilar Kholin.

The more I learn, the more I seethe with rage. Especially after RoW? How dare you speak to her that way? You would forsake your friends, you’re comrades? You think you’re hot shit? Boy you stepped in it.

Perish.

I think Sanderson’s greatest strength when writing is being able to make you initially hate a character with your whole being and then, through expanding the world and the narrative, makes those same characters fan favorites.

Rereading TWoK’s I’m reminded of how the first time I read I fucking HATED Adolin. What a dick. What an asshole. Jock. Daddy’s money ass rich boy.

Now, after reading all of Stormlight I would probably pass away if anything bad happened to him. His whimsy? Unmatched. Style? Impeccable. Aptitude for revenge? Present. He is My Little Pony (power of friendship). He’s just a horse girl that likes clubbing and making new friends.

Same thing happened for me with Susebron, TenSoon, Marsh, etc etc etc.

Marcille is so funny to me. she's such a bait and switch. when we're first introduced to her you see this cute girl who's totally distraught at everything Laios does and you think she's gonna be the tropey token girl in the party who does the healing and stays out of the fights and has to be the designated Team Mom. but that's not Marcille at all. she's only on healing duty because Falin isn't around. she's a frontline attacker and she's constantly thinking about murder and explosions.

dungeon meshi really said "so there's this incredibly powerful black mage whose signature spell is "explode your skull" and she loves necromancy and is wanted in 5 countries. she can heal in a pinch but when she does it, it hurts, because there isn't a gentle bone in her body" and then she looks like this. i love her so much

Imagine being so good at therapy that you literally teach a magic psychopath demon sword the power of friendship (inanimate object btw)

Inversely, imagine also being so good at therapy that you therapize your suicidal client so hard that he finally gets the balls to actually kill himself so that he can escape the voices (Magical mass murderer btw)

your main therapy tools are a magic flute & crawfish boil (btw)

"Kill them with kindness" wrong. 10 PLAGUES OF EGYPT!🩸🩸🩸🐸🐸🐸🪰🪰🪰🐅🐅🐅🐂🐂🐂🥵🥵🥵⛈️⛈️⛈️ 🦗🦗🦗 🌑🌑🌑🪦🪦🪦

Kept me up at night

*slams door open, covered in blood* I finished wind and truth

Valette: On my plantation I helped the skaa workers Elend: Boys I think we should let this Valette into our conversations. Isn't she the most kindhearted, wonderful, beautiful--y'know on second thought why don't I just marry her? Mr. Valette Renoux has a lovely ring to it, don't you think?