Footage Of My Brain (2025, Colorised):

The feeling after fasting for 16 to 24 hours >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I avoided binging this evening, I'm so happy w myself.

Turns out that having a bigger lunch (trust, it was big.) that makes you full really helps.

I wanna vomit, I hate my lower stomach.

For those of you who use tiktok, do y'all know those videos of 'what I eat in a day'? Yeah, abt that. While I'm not a hater towards anyone in particular, I have a general thing where I'm wondering why ppl eat so much. Not necessarily their main meals (who can honestly look amazing and nutritious), but why do they need to eat every 2-3 hours? Why do ppl need to have breakfast at f.e. 8, have a snack at 9, another one at 11, then lunch at 12, another snack at like 3, dinner, and another snack before bed?

You don't rlly need all that in a day.

I have a friend whose mom has been struggling with a4a all her life. She believes ppl shouldn't weigh above 50kg and would often make remarks on her friend's weight/look.

For those of you who don't know me, I'm objectively overweight. It's something I'm dealing with and working on, and joked once or twice that I was scared to go to her house, because of what her mom would say (true thing though, I just didn't want to make a big deal out of it or make her feel bad). She said it didn't really matter and not to listen to her mom, esp since it wouldn't be to my face.

Yesterday, we were talking about how my grandma wanted to see a pic of her and said she's pretty, and my friend said she hasn't showed any pic of me to her mom because she's scared of what her mom would say.

Cooked.

REAL, I randomly stop studying just to scroll on tumblr and look through the tags. I also had a phase at some pointwhere I'd be like "it's ok to neglect my studies for a bit. I can't be stupid AND ugly."

does anyone else’s ED severely impact their academics? and not just in an “@na brain” way?

i mean instead of studying or doing online assignments i’m obsessively consuming media related to weight loss/food/dieting.

i feel guilty when i sit down to study or do schoolwork because “i could be burning calories exercising right now.”

I want to be able to hang out with my friends and not feel self concious abt my rolls

Can't wait to be skinny enough to not feel like I'm embarassing my friends while I'm hanging out with them, or when they introduce me to their parents.

Stop trying to cheat your way out of a fast. The weight won't come off by itself

tb to my teen years when i had a b.e.d. and was so stubborn to not let my mom see that her words regarding my body/weight affected me that I didn't try to lose weight