Ilovebirthdayspartis - Untitled

the women of america were once promised that butch dykes would be lurking in all corners of society, ready to corrupt our minds and turn us all gay. what ever happened to that. where are the butches uncle sam.

How I be looking like in 3dblrr

i have finally perfected my twitter feed

i want someone who will be my boyfriend in the butch dyke sort of way, not in the embarrassingly mediocre cis man way. i want to grab onto my butch lesbian boyfriend’s bicep when we’re walking and leave hickeys on their neck and take their strap like the princess i am

ariana grande wearing schiaparelli at the 2025 oscars ♪‧₊˚

Wish there was more loser, slightly unwell, maybe even insane reader...

No pressure or anything... but like...

“I’m not sleeping over prank”

Ellie Williams x fem reader (established relationship)

AN: my first proper fic let me know if you guys like it :)

Friday night.

Otherwise known as: the weekly ritual where you and Ellie pretend to hate each other while sharing garlic knots and aggressively cuddling like codependent raccoons.

She was currently starfished across her bed, one sock on, flipping through your sketchbook like she had an arts degree instead of mild commitment issues.

She paused on a page. “You gave this frog a six-pack?”

You didn’t even look up. “He goes to the gym.”

Ellie blinked at it. “Okay, but like. Why is he hot.”

“Don’t sexualize the frog.”

“I’m not trying to. He’s just… objectively shredded.”

You rolled your eyes. “I fear you.”

She tossed the sketchbook onto your lap like it was cursed. “Anyway. What movie are we watching tonight? I want trauma.”

You shrugged. “Actually… I think I’m heading home tonight.”

Silence.

Not dramatic silence. Not slow build.

Immediate, soul-leaving-the-body silence.

Ellie sat up. “Wait. What.”

“I’m just gonna sleep in my bed tonight.”

More silence.

“…Why.”

You pretended to check your phone. “Dunno. Just feel like it.”

She blinked at you. “Are you breaking up with me.”

“Oh my god.”

“No, be honest. Is this, like, a soft-launch breakup??”

You bit your lip to stop yourself from laughing. “I just want a solo night. Do a face mask. Read. Maybe trauma dump into my Notes app.”

Ellie looked personally attacked. “You can trauma dump here. That’s what I’m for. That’s literally half my personality.”

You shrugged. “I want to romanticize loneliness for a sec.”

She squinted. “Is this about the mac and cheese?”

“…What mac and cheese.”

She avoided eye contact. “Nothing.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Ellie.”

“I may have microwaved the foil one. It sparked. I panicked and threw it in the sink.”

“You tried to drown it?”

“It felt right in the moment.”

You stared. “You owe me five packs of Mac and cheese and a new microwave.”

She scoffed. “This is deflection. You’re leaving me.”

You sighed dramatically. “I’m not—”

“No, you don’t get to gaslight me. It’s Friday. You sleep over on Fridays. It’s the law. You signed a girlfriend contract and everything.”

You were full-on grinning now. “There was no contract.”

“There was. It was verbal. And sealed with garlic knots and kisses.”

You finally let yourself laugh.

Ellie’s eyes narrowed. “Wait.”

You said nothing. Just smiled harder.

“Oh my god,” she groaned, flopping back onto the bed like you’d shot her. “You’re messing with me.”

“I was curious to see how unwell you’d get.”

“I spiraled,” she said, voice muffled into her hoodie. “I had a whole monologue ready. It was gonna be Oscar-worthy. I was about to sit dramatically on the floor and look out the window like a Victorian child.”

You leaned over and kissed her cheek. “You’re so dramatic for someone who acts like she doesn’t care about anything.”

“Shut up,” she muttered, but she turned her face toward yours like she wanted another kiss.

You gave her one. Just to be nice.

And also because you were wildly in love with her. But whatever. Not the point.

Ellie sighed. “You know this means war.”

You smiled against her skin. “Do your worst.”

“Oh, I will,” she said. “You’ll wake up one day and all your playlists will be replaced with Joe Rogan podcasts.”

You gasped. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“I’m petty and I have access to your Spotify.”

You pushed her off the bed. She dragged you down with her.

You both lay there, limbs tangled, absolutely not moving to go watch a movie.

“Can we still get pizza?” she asked, voice soft now.

“Obviously.”

“And you’ll stay the night?”

You nudged her side. “I was always staying the night.”

She exhaled. “Cool. Good. I’d pretend I didn’t care but I’d probably go sit in the dark and stare at the wall like I’m in an A24 film.”

You snorted.

That night, you stayed—of course you did—and she didn’t even try to steal the blanket. Which was her love language, really.

You didn’t say it out loud, but you kind of hoped every Friday stayed like this.

Weird. Warm. Dumb. Yours.

I’M JUST A TEENAGE DIRTBAG, BABY!

LOSER! abby anderson, ellie williams, dina, vi

contains: fluff and suggestive content. about 4-5 headcanons for each character.

ABBY ANDERSON

: ̗̀➛ loser!abby has horrific handwriting, some may even call it the ‘doctor’s handwriting. the majority of her notes look like she fell asleep while writing them, yet she manages to keep them so organized. she doesn’t care about her penmanship, until you’re squinting and asking, “what does this say?” then, she has to admit she doesn’t really know either. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!abby who talks to herself when she’s searching for something. pacing around the apartment repeating, “if i were my car keys… where would i be?” she’d even pause to rest her chin between her pointer and thumb, looking up to ceiling as if it’ll give her clues. she’ll also say “aha! gotcha!” when she finally finds it. i don’t make the rules. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!abby is not as subtle as she thinks she is. the two of you are headed to the movies for a date, and as much as she liked to ball out on snacks for you, these prices are no joke. so, she decides to stuff 3 family-sized bags of chips in her jacket, and about 4 bags of candy in her pockets. the ticket attendant scoffs at abby’s weirdly shaped body, and the obvious crinkle of her snacks. nonetheless, she lets you both in with an eye roll. abby’ll look over at you with a smirk claiming, “see, they never even knew.” 

: ̗̀➛ she’s horrible at small talk. at first, it’d start off strong, asking something like, “how’s it going?” then, she’ll forget to follow up, so she’ll start saying her thoughts out loud. “man, it’s hot outside today.” or “i wonder what the dogs are up to today.” 

: ̗̀➛ loser!abby can be overly competitive about the dumbest stuff. it could be rock-paper-scissors, who could fit the most marshmallows in their mouth, or even who can get the most high fives in a day.

ELLIE WILLIAMS

: ̗̀➛ loser!ellie who still uses her fingers to count. it was something she never grew out of, and in her defense, she was always correct when she used it. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!ellie who tries way too hard to be cool. she’ll wear those same scribbled on, beat up converse because she thinks it’ll give her a punk edge. never mind the soles flopping off with every step she takes, it doesn’t bother her one bit. she’ll also quote niche movies or lines in a game, and when you don’t get it, she’ll act like you’re the dumb one. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!ellie who gets way too emotional when it comes to games. she could be flat out cheating during uno, but if she doesn’t woman, her whole world turns upside down. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!ellie who talks big, but can’t own up to it. she’ll boasts about the way nothing bothers her, and how things are never that serious. but the moment someone looks at for a minute too long, her mind starts racing with ‘what ifs.’

: ̗̀➛ loser!ellie who will dedicate her entire day to doing trick shots. she’ll spend about 10 minutes trying to perfect a bottle flip, and when she does, she’s cheering so loud it causes a disturbance to everyone outside. 

DINA

: ̗̀➛ loser!dina who can’t go a day without quoting a vine. she’ll look you dead in the eye when saying one, and when nobody laughs, she’s still doubling over with laughter. oh, and don’t let her see a potato with a ceiling fan in the same room. you’ll completely forget what silence sounds like.

: ̗̀➛ loser!dina who sings everything instead of saying it. she refuses to say anything normally singing, “i’m hungryyy,” with a jingle, and it’ll intensify if you tell her to stop. especially, if ellie is around to badly harmonize with her. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!dina who starts fake arguments over things people deem as pointless, but mean the most to her. she’ll absolutely flip out if you bring up the pineapple on pizza debate, and you best believe she’s got statistics to back her up. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!dina who’ll start doing a really bad impression of you if you piss her off. she’s so quick to mimic your mannerisms, and anything you say she’ll immediately parrot it. 

VI

: ̗̀➛ loser!vi who fake boxes you whenever she see you, or she’ll throw light punches on your shoulder. it’s never hard enough to hurt you though, and it’s only for ‘practice.’

: ̗̀➛ loser!vi who refuses to pronounce words properly. even if you correct her, she’ll still say it the way she wants to. there’s been numerous occasions where she’ll say shark-coochery instead of charcuterie. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!vi who gets extremely flustered when complimented. she’ll try to brush it off with an eye roll, but she can’t hide the blush creeping upon her neck. 

: ̗̀➛ loser!vi who fights a vending machine instead of asking for help. the poor thing has to deal with vi’s hard punches instead of a little shaking. shouldn’t have ate her quarters.