Lostindifference - Why..?

workouts & stretches for posture

🤍 5 minute everyday pilates back routine by lidia mera

🤍 8 minute fix for neck hump by yuuka sagwa

🤍 8 minute upper body stretch by mizi

🤍 10 minute fix forward head & neck posture by mizi

🤍 10 minute fix your posture pilates style stretch by eleni fit

🤍 10 minute workout & stretch for round back by pamela reif

🤍 10 minute slim back & better posture by emi wong

🤍 10 minute fix posture & reduce back pain by mady morrison

🤍 20 minute posture correction by akshaya agnes

🤍 25 minute workout for better posture by growingannanas

🤍 25 minute pilates for better posture by move with nicole

🤍 30 minute pilates for upper body & posture by move with nicole

I wish my life was still mine, like when I was a kid felt so good to get home from school and have something to be passionate about doing but now it’s getting home from school and feeling like I have no privacy, no place where I can destress and be alone without someone else being there, it’s feeling like I have no life outside of what I do academically and that while I have a body, I’m not a person. I’m more of an object to fulfill the expectations of others. Someone that needs to respect everyone except myself. Someone expect to throw everything I know and believe aside to dial down myself and make me digestible for others. It hurts.

Don't sabotage your future peace because familiar chaos is comfortable.

I guess what I hate the most about myself is the fact that I will probably never be as competent or desirable or pretty or quite literally anything compared to everyone around me.

have you eaten yet? (I love you I love you) do you want a snack? (I love you I love you) what's your favorite food? (I love you I love you) can I make you a cup of tea? (I love you I love you) can you help me with dinner? (I love you I love you) I'll bring you some soup for the cold (I love you I love you) I made these and thought of you (I love you I love you) I'm sorry for your loss, take this it was my mother's recipe (I love you I love you) congratulations! let's celebrate with dessert! (I love you I love you) can I get you something to eat? (I love you I love you) no one can make it like my grandmother's (I love you I love you) I made sure it was dietary restriction friendly for you, I hope you like it (I love you I love you) love is stored in food (I love you I love you I love you I love you)

I think the goal is not to be perfect and try to change everything of us (or others too, as we project on them our "dark" sides) but to accept ourselves despite our imperfections and "flaws". No matter how much we try, we'll always end up doing or saying something that can be considered wrong or bad, even unconsciously. And that's completely okay. We interface with different people, and we cannot please everyone or we'll just go crazy. But we need to please ourselves and give us a break. Be kind with ourselves as we're just trying. Appreciate who we are, light and dark. We'll always make mistakes, we'll always make a wrong choice... Sure we can try to change what we really do not appreciate, the coping mechanisms that are hindering and making us suffer (the ones we're not even aware of), but we need to remember there's no recipe to be perfect as there's no real perfection. We can always try to be better but we cannot reach that perfection we aim to as it doesn't exist. We cannot be that to feel accepted and included, to feel seen and valued, to feel less alone: people change their mind as the wind anyway. But we can see all of who we are and welcome our darkest side and try to feel more content and... not make us feel alone by abandoning and neglecting a side of us that still exists and needs our love, even if we accuse it to not let us be accepted by others. Maybe if we accepted it, accepted our whole self, and knew us... maybe we'd feel less alone, more apt to see our light within without having to compare to others and more open to others too.

It stresses me out that I don’t know who I am, who I want to be, what I want to do with my life, or who I want to surround myself with and when I do try to think about any of those things I have a crisis of some sort or just resort to the thought that nothing matters and life isn’t worth the suffering to stick around long enough to find out.

I HAVE to stop intentionally looking at triggering content and get my shit together, a family member I live with just called me of today for not eating like I’m supposed to and mentioned taking me to the doctor over it and it’s like they can’t do anything cause there’s nothing actually physically wrong with me it’s just what’s going on in my head and eating less has reduced my appetite. She’s the last person i want to take me to the doctor though so leaving my Lana del ray girl interrupted era that lasted about 2 days 😓

Sometimes I get scared I won’t see the day my life gets better, other time I wonder if i could even stay alive long enough to see it. I’m scared for my future and I barely see myself having one anyway. Do I really want to live long enough to find out anymore?