Children Crusade 9

THE LAST JEDI Broom Boy

Got to love RJ we meet three orphans being exploited in Canto Bight with similar backstories to Finn want to guess who RJ decides to give the Force out of a White Girl, A White Boy and A Black Boy? The white boy of course as one last fuck you to Finn Fans. Good Old Broom Boy gets the Force but not a fucking lead nah Finn doesn't get shit. Some minor insignificant character is gets to move a broom with no training so really RJ gives Finn fans absolutely nothing of they want and rubs their faces in the dirt about it.

RJ: KEEP THE FORCE WHITE

NO RJ TRILOGY 

KK REIGNED IN OR OUT

No More Shitting on the OT, No More Reylo and no more shitting on Finn and Poe with bs character arcs. 

But sure its all Alt-Right Bots and Trolls.

Christmas Miracle even I didn't think it fall so short. Even with Christmas it cant hit a 100 million.

'Star Wars: The Last Jedi' ruling holiday box office, 'Jumanji' No. 2

Plus: 'Pitch Perfect 3' and 'The Greatest Showman'

The money quote:

Of that figure, $68.5 million comes from this weekend’s Friday-Sunday frame, which represents a steep (but bearable) drop-off of 69 percent from last week.

Really. Steep but bearable? Uh huh.

There was no way it wasn’t going to be Luke’s Fault. However, my problem is Luke failed twice. It his fault that Kylo goes dark to some extent which I can accept to a degree but I cannot accept that on top of that Luke does nothing to clean up the mess. He goes off to a random planet and sits around doing zilch while Kylo and Snoke rekt face. The same Snoke that goes down to Kylo fresh off a loss to an untrained Rey and Rey who has lets be generous? How much time do you think Rey has known she has the Force, 3 weeks assuming some time skips? 

So an Akira style ending doesn't do shit for me to redeem Luke because really Luke should have been more then powerful to mop up Snoke and Kylo himself. He is only 50 or so Mace was about the same age when he threw down with Palpatine so don't give me he was too old like Kenobi and Yoda. Yoda also at least tried against Palpatine before running for the hills and Kenobi thought he had finished Anakin. Instead, we have zero indication that Luke tried to stop Kyo and Snoke at all until he goes godlike at the end. Which doesnt make up for what 5 plus years of not doing shit...

And thus there is no hope the Last Skywalker has killed not just 2/3rds of his family but the entire dream of a New Republic and New Jedi Order as well. And you know what is worse? A large swath of the fandom will still want him to get redeemed (Not Vader), a full on happy ending making super force babies with Rey.

I feel bad for George Lucas quite frankly. They are even retconning the Chosen One Prophecy and making fundamental changes to the Force. Who the fuck do KK a supposed friend of George and RJ think they are?

So basically: The Force Awakens was "Han's movie" and he died. The Last Jedi is Luke's movie and apparently he dies. Episode IX would be Leia's movie and she would be die?

Hi Anon,

Well, it certainly looks that way, doesn’t it?

George’s original idea, as I have read, was that Luke, Han and Leia would be supporting the main players, who were their kids. (or at least Han and Leia’s - I’m not sure I’ve read what Luke was doing in all this but….)

Then JJ arrived, threw out pretty much everything, and decided that Luke, Han and Leia should get a “fitting sendoff.”

Now, if you can explain to me how breaking up Han and Leia’s marriage, making their only child a Dark Sider, destroying Luke’s school and sending him off to be a hermit, then killing Han for nothing is a “fitting sendoff” then I think you should write Episode 9.

Because, yes, it looks now that Han dies in 8 for no damn good reason at all other than it’s the third act of a New Hope reboot and he’s oldest male lead so he goes down (or he’s “sexy luggage” according to JJ.). Because, and I stg I read this from some fan review, “Han and Leia should be crucified because of Kylo.” 

Yeah, so, there’s that.

I guess Luke will be blamed for Kylo - Mark is quoted in this week’s print Entertainment Weekly that there will be flashbacks and that the movie deals with the fallout of Luke thinking Kylo is the Chosen One. Which why tf Luke would even know the prophecy or care or NOT THINK IT’S HIS DAD when I’m sure Obi Wan would have told him is beyond me.

I would hope that Leia would have gotten a kinder fate in 9, but considering murder by your own child after your life is destroyed is called a “fitting sendoff” then I doubt it.

I don’t know, Anon. I mean, okay, they could have killed Luke, Han and Leia. I would not have been surprised.

But they could have left them together. Have them go out together, taking on the First Order so that Rey and Finn and Poe could win the day. 

What if Luke does live till 9? What’s he got? Han’s dead, Leia’s dead, his whole life in ruins…yeah. 

Thanks, Anon

Basically it just feels because RJ was willing to dickride Kylo Ren and Adam Driver so hard who we know KK loves since Adam didn't even have to audition. RJ got himself Carte Blanche to do whatever he want. I mean JJ is the one who wanted John (and his execution was poor), KK never wanted John at all. So I am not all surprised and what is going down for FInn. Although I should note this is the fucking opposite of how they sold us Finn and Rose in the lead up. Where Rose was a big Fan  of Finn. Instead it seems will get another does of a Female Partner outshining Finn until Phasma. 

What does surprise me though is KK letting RJ making massive lore changes and retcons to the Force that override fucking George Lucas in the Luke Skywalker part of the plot. That is what surprises me. I knew it was bad sign when RJ got along with KK so well unlike all the other directors and got a new trilogy.

But apparently RJ is genius for Woobyifying another “Bad Boy“ White Male while marginalizing the POC to forgettable plot line and comic relief. Its not like we never seen this shit before. I get enough of the kid glove treatment for white monsters in the news thank you very much.

This doesn’t even make any sense story wise. Every Resistance member knows that Finn risked his life to stop Starkiller Base. Rose suddenly being “what, a traitor” makes zero fucking sense. If Finn wanted to betray the Resistance he would have done nothing and just let the FO blow them out of the sky.

Rian Johnson is willfully stupid when it comes to any of the characters of color but especially to Finn. Of course it makes no sense! But of course he doesn’t care because he’s too busy using his 2 brain cells on creating a fascist-loving white story for his lily white actors! It makes no sense because he doesn’t give a fuck about Finn.

TLJ SPOILERS

Oh god if the latest spoilers are true. I am beyond disgusted. I simply do not see how RJ got a trilogy off this shit. Well I do KK only ever gave a fuck about Kylo Ren and Adam Driver. So Fuck Feminism and Fuck Diversity.

The Latest and Greatest Hits

1) Luke sees the Darkness in Kylo caused by Snoke and tries to kill him with a lightsaber. Luke Skywalker the man who tried to save his father. Who threw down his own lightsaber to try to save his Evil Father from the Dark Side rather then strike him down. Decides to attempt to murder a defenseless child to save the Galaxy. How the fuck is this not character assassination of the highest order? No wonder Mark hated shit. George Lucas should sue.

2) Shirtless Kylo scene where Rey blushes and tells Kylo to put his shirt on you heard that right the supposed main lead and heroine getting wet over then man who killed her supposed Mentor/his father, maimed her best friend, tried to break into her mind and tossed her into a tree along with being a high ranking fascist regime member who aided genocide and civilian slaughter....this is truly a nightmare and a Reylo and Alt Righters wet dream.

Beyond Disgusting if True.

You say that but its not like the Magic Story-line didn't involve killing characters during major conflicts to raise stakes. Heck I argue it was more Game of Thrones in the past after all even Urza died. So I think blaming it on Game of Thrones, is disingenuous to the extreme. I mean the end game against Yawgmoth resulted in all but 2 of the Nine Titans dying and most of the Weatherlight crew as well. Sealing the Time Rifts? Again more dead characters. More recently Venser Dead. Elspeth Dead. So MtG never had a problem killing major characters in the past but now the Gatewatch has unlimited plot armor.

The Gatewatch they go up against the Eldrazi and Bolas and lose not a single member.  I can make a case for Bolas not killing most of the Gatewatch. Vess is obvious. Jace could be played on Ravnica since he is the guildpact. Nissa has a unique ability with her leyline stuff. After that though the case for keeping Gideon and especially Chandra around seems rather nonexistant to me. Gideon maybe cause Bolas proved his ability is useless and you want an idiot steering the enemy team as the leader. But what reason does Bolas have for keeping Chandra around?

That's one thing a lot of people hate, that winning over the Eldrazi was an "easy" victory, they were built up so much and so well in the first Zendikar block only to be turned into another generic villain to be killed in the BfZ block. And Hour of Devastation was barely even a setback, I think a lot of people were expecting half of them to die and the other half to be turned into Bolas thralls or at least one of them suffering from something that couldn't be cursed in one block.

They were built up so much and so well because you never actually saw them. It’s the Boba Fett effect, the moment you have to explain them they stop being cool. So the choice was either to literally never deal with them cause they’re too OP, or to make them more manageable. We still don’t know if there’s more to the story there, as Ugin flat out states.

Did you know that people don’t have to die for there to be stakes? There’s a really toxic attitude out there from grimdark fiction like Game of Thrones that is easily proven untrue by decades of genre literature never requiring it.

This AU came back I guess...

Finn & POE MORE THOUGHTS

RJ took everything wrong with the Finn Arc from TFA and instead of fixing, he double down on it. More Comic Relief, More of Finn being less capable then a female except this time it isnt Rey the supposed lead instead he gets shown up my a new character, RJ invented just to try to kill FinnRey. Heck she even goes one step further teaches him life lessons like he is fucking child. The only positive is he gets to beat Phasma through Phasma making a mistake. Heck about the only thing Finn had going for him was plot relevance and RJ decides to say fuck that as well. Nothing Finn does matter.

RJ then decides you know fuck TFA showing Poe as a trusted competent resistance leader that Leia trust. Oh and fuck the Poe Comics as well that is not Poe you get here. Now you got Poe the gladstanding showoff carelessly risking lifes who hates taking orders from women. Leia doesnt keep him around because he is competent and trusted and she worked with his parents. No he is kept around because hey he is dumb and sexist but at least he looks hot. Also a reoccurring issue nothing he does matters.

Finn and Poe are bonded by getting fucking tasered for no reason. And being utterly irrelevant. Its like RJ got his ideas about Black People, Latinos and Asians from fucking Stormfront. Blacks are dumb only good for jokes. Latinos are also dumb only good if they are hot. Asians are smart. And they all should be plot irrelevant.

No Finn, No Poe, Only A Little Rose from what I seen on twitter....RJ is Genius though apparently for putting the focus on the White Male Mass Murderer and making the Force White Only while dumping all the POC in the irrelevant B-Plot that doesn't even deserve mention by almost all the critics. Consider me unimpressed. 

There’s been jackshit about Finn other than him killing phasma. Spoilers my ass.

I am happy Carrie Fisher is gone I shudder what they do to Leia. Cant wait for Mark to right a tell all book and no wonder George Lucas didn't grace the red carpet. Disney better have an airtight contract or George Lucas should sue.

Luke Skywalker couldn't kill his own father in duel threw down his lightsaber and was willing to let the Emperor kill him instead. Even though he knew his father was a monster. Heck it isn't restricted to family...Luke gave Jabba The Hut notorious criminal to which he had no Family ties a chance to surrender Han first. But I am suppose to believe Luke Skywalker would draw his Lightsaber to kill his nephew over some Dark Thoughts? You have to be shitting me.

TLJ spoilers (about Luke and Kylo’s backstory):

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