Think About All The Times You Looked At Someone Without Them Noticing. Now Think About How Many Times

People who make advertisements for girls’ toys don’t seem to have any idea how girls play with them. Barbies don’t have nice civilised tea parties and talk about boys, it’s more like Game of Thrones except everyone is a lesbian

“How are you?”

101 Dalmatians (1961) dir. Wolfgang Reitherman, Hamilton Luske & Clyde Geronimi

When people start trash talking my favourite series

endless list of pixar characters → harris, hubert and hamish (brave)

toast annoys me so much cos like it’s bread that’s been toasted so we call it “toast” but if you fry a potato it’s not called a “fry”

If you’ve slept with less than 12 people, then sleeping with you is a more exclusive club than walking on the moon.

By using smartphones to tell time, we’ve essentially gone back to the pocket watch

Hug your parents when they want one because some parents are just big kids who can’t hug their parents anymore