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Light Pollution

Staring at the dark ceiling

I have it memorized

If only the glow in the dark stars were real constellations

I’d know my way around them by now

I’m a night owl; a nocturnal creature dealing

A toilet flushing down the hall

Brings me back to my punishment of being under aged

Being owned by your parents

They call it custody

I call it a prison of musty walls

I'm allergic to the stuffy skeleton of this house

Keeping the keys quiet so I don’t get in trouble

Deep trouble

For something so little

In comparison of the big picture and the hole in my blouse

I need to get away from the light pollution

So I can shine brighter than my cousins

Two stars, and I get compared to them

It’s inevitable because I'm trapped being related

Because I must be part of the salty solution

I must get away from the people asking me why I'm not shining,

While my surface is burning hotter than magma

Waiting to explode

Letting the pressure you put in me develop,

Into diamonds I will wear while going out with a special one dining

Letting some steam off in a perfect sun storm

I'm fast and burn hard

But I wait like a cat about to pounce

You won’t see it coming before you're in a ring of flames

You can’t freeze my flames out, with your heart so cold you still can’t even make the temperature go from hot to warm

What Sweet Luck

Hair like black lace

A beautiful kind of tangled

I'm happy that I was once her case

Sophisticated

Yet humble

I'm intoxicated

On you

You hate chunky orange juice

I hate being away from you

So for now, you are my muse

You are becoming abstract thought

I find this interesting

My eyes searching but not

Getting caught

I'm high

On you and your missing presence

And yet you feel nearby

I'm reaching

For her extra crazy hope

That she’s superb at teaching

With her bad analogies

Her and her flawed

Perfectness

She was just the right kind of odd,

I'm like a spider with a web and she’s like a bug that’s stuck

She has no idea that she has been caught in my poetry

What sweet luck,

Because I miss you so

A Chip In The Dip

Just another chip lost in the dip

The second half of the broken chip

No one’s favorite

Always picked last

Salty tears I cry                   (cuz I'm a chip lol)

I want to get out of the thick ocean

But I'm stuck

No going back now

Everyone sees me

But they won’t help me

I'm oh so blue

Slowly sinking more and more under

The thunder of the storm grows louder

It surrounds me

I hate the coolness but start to like it

It gives me a false comfort that I like

I like taking a risk in it

Now it has me all the way under

I'm drowning

It hurts less than I expected

I see it getting darker as I sink

But it hypnotizes me

I like sinking

I see everyone else swimming

I like being under it’s like I know a secret that they don’t

They can’t see you because you’re under so far

I have lost most of my salt so I sink yet further

The ocean makes it feel like I'm on top of the world flying

But I'm just the opposite but I don’t care

No one can save me now

But I like that, it makes you feel free of everyone

I wish that one certain person could save me

They think they did one other time but they didn’t

You think I’ll be perfectly fine again, but what if I never was?

I screamed for help once but you didn’t listen as I walked away

I need them

How dare you leave me like this?

I think you owe me an apology yet the world still owes me nothing

You think you cleaned my slate for me but you didn’t

Instead you scratched it up

You think nothing of it

But you don’t know half of it

I just want you to hold me, with your gentle fingers and warm me with the kindhearted words you speak

Sorry I just get scared and lonely just like you

Please heal my stone turned heart

It’s been broken from a young age

Living day to........day, broken

I've almost hit the bottom of the almost infinite ocean

I want to be in the sky

The sky is infinite

I hope you realize that what goes up doesn’t always come back down

Angles started from the ground and they stay in the sky

I want to be there

Save me if you care

I hope you’ll be there forever

Forever not never

Rachel

Those damn ex’s

Leave your brain perplexed

Walks lightly

Thinks brightly

Favorite color is green

Just like a spleen

Understands your weird, random metaphors

Doesn’t waste her time and energy knocking down unnecessary doors

The grand piano player

Has many layers

Some that I’ll probably never get to see

Gave away her key

Seems pretty sophisticated

Good fated

Always saying that everyone has their own fight

Not afraid to spend the night

Looking out for me

Lets my thoughts be

She’s courageous

She’s contagious

You’ll always want her around

Leaves you thinking new thoughts like why don’t you just push off the ground

What are you hiding under there?

Doesn’t take a stupid dare

Goes beyond

Knows about that dirty mucky messed up pond

Promises you that you can fly

Look at those blue eyes

Deep

Proves the secrets that she keeps

Fell and scraped her knee

Got stung by the swarm of stinging bees

But stood

To show life that she could

So smart

She’s off the chart

So much more to learn

In life there are so many places to turn...

No Control

No control

So lay me down to rest

I'm done trying my best

IBD is a troll

My head is a now a mess

It wants you to get depressed

So I fill myself with happiness

I can’t let it win

So instead I grin

It makes you feel loneliness

Put on your mockingjay pin

Life’s not so bad, lift up your chin

Pick up your head

You try to ignore the anger

Pain and I are no stranger

Or lie back down to bed

Be a tanker

Keep going, even if you have to be a faker

Come on

Don’t let it

Get to you bit by bit

Stop singing that sad song

Don’t throw that fit

You have grit

Knocked me down

IBD

Is a bully, he pushed me

All the way to the dirty, cold, hard, ground

And I scraped my knee

But I still try to fill myself with glee

Dear, IBD get lost!

Take a hike!

It’s the third strike

You aren’t the boss

You, nobody likes

You can’t catch me on my bike

I fell

There comes a point

Where you want to roll a joint

You stupid spell

The why bother going on point

I don’t care anymore, even if it can affect your joints

Frustrating

Every time I get back on my feet

I get hit hard on the concrete

IBD hating

After everything finally becomes neat

I get hit when I try to cross the street

This has been going on for awhile

Will it ever end?

Well that depends

Always wanting to be normal, everything in a messed up pile

I don’t want to be your friend

Again

For the world I wouldn’t miss

Could you offer me your hand?

To help me stand

I've got this

I can

As long as you can understand

Clumsy Ballerina

I'm a clumsy ballerina

Dancing from sorrow to morrow

Trying to take a twirl with happiness

But never quite succeeding

Prince charming asks if he can have this dance

I say yes, but honestly, I just want to chasse and get away

I’d much rather be exploring this castle

Instead of being stuck at this boring ball

Switching from person to person, trying and trying is tiring

As a misfit, I am tremendously tired of these triplets

Hanging heavy in the air

Making it hard to fly

I’m out of breathe

Can I just plie and stop with this ballet?

To take a rest

I do an arabesque

I do not recognize this music

But my heart is pounding out the beat to this mad song that plays on and on

I'm off time

And out of grace

I'm dipping and tripping all over the place as if I were drunk

I'm stepping on peoples toes because I don’t know how this dance goes

Too dizzy

To know that I’m in a tizzy

With my tap shoes, I'm trying to tap out

How could I question my depression

When I know that it is the most graceful and charming

While I am inept when it comes to this dance

You Seem so Real

You seem so real

And this whole relationship is a big deal

And I still can’t decide

Even though you always take my side

It seems like an easy one

But I went for it just for some fun

You're magnetic and draw me in

I can’t help but feel the pull on the sting attached to my tin

My ex was a cartoon

And you hit me with a harpoon

As I tried to do to him

But he didn’t understand he was so dim

He was fake happy, living in a world with no storms

And precipitation comes in many forms

So how’d he get the rainbows?

He hung out with too many hoes

You're talking about kissing on new years

As I thought about with Juan last year before he caused me tears

But I wouldn’t want to with you because you're not near

Oh my lovely dear

You're prince charming

But because Juan was doing the heart harming,

I can’t fall head over,

Heels; Juan is what's left of the stover

I’ve Been Wronged

A bit of white on blue isn't

A tad quite all white

All I see is white

A pure, Christian shade of white A white expanding cloud

A white page

An unknown

Anonymous An

Anxiety

Attack

And a loss of godliness Honestly it became a sharp

Hue of

Hatred

How did it come to this... "Hi" I say to my friend

He says it was a

Hit and run

However I Have to try not to

Hyperventilate through this

Hiccup. Why did this have to

Happen. Now my car has a Scarlet letter, but I am getting

Help to hammer out the dents

I only wish I could have frozen

Time

Words

People say that words can’t hurt you

But words can make you dangerously blue

They say that sticks and stones hurt more

But they don’t get that words aren’t a bore

Words have a lot of meaning

Stop the brain cleaning

Why do you think I write poems?

Poems are my home

Sticks and stones may break your bones but they can’t ever hurt your soul

Unless you let them slip through a little hole

Words have a way of sneaking around everyone’s hearts and minds

Too bad you don’t have to pay a fine

Some words hurt like knifes

Don’t let it ruin your life

Words can leave marks,

Scars and painful friction sparks

Other words are kind

Some can blind

You can’t only say I love you to me

You have to not just prove it but make me see

I now don’t trust easily at all

People who I used to trust have made me fall

Not only did they do that they made sure that I heard their laughter

After

I can still hear them in my head

When everyone else is in bed

Sleeping

While I lock myself in my room weeping

Their laughter always growing louder

Why must I cower?

I wish I was strong like everyone else

I just want to be my old self

Everyone says I'm strong but really I'm not

They don’t know I cry a lot

They say I'm strong

But they're wrong

They all think I'm fine

They say that while all they do is shine

I'm just the cloudy, dirty, run down, rusty

Musty…

No one ever wants me

I'm the third wheel all the time, you see

You always tell me someone is worse off than me

Why can’t you just flee?

The laughter is so loud that it is part of the beat of my drum

What have I become?

Why do you enjoy making me feel worthless?

You are careless

The stress

Of always trying to be the best

You’ve made me a mess

I just want to be me

You never hear my pleas

Of just let me be me

I beg you please

Just turn it off

And step off

And you wonder why I don’t tell you anything or even speak at all

I just don’t want to bawl

Stop looking at me with that stupid judging look

I gratefully have unhooked

From you

We’re not stuck like glue

I've lost faith in the human mind

You can’t even be somewhat kind

Words make up the human world

Sometimes they can be bold, twisted and curled

Words hurt more than physical pain

You have a box of permanent letters in your brain

Of all the mean,

Things ever said to you, you're fat, you should be more lean

Some of the letters are signed with your name

Yes you are that lame

You really are your worst enemy

Slowly killing yourself…

Bang Bang

My heart is made of gold

And it's oh so heavy it hurts

With every bang, bang Today

My broken is showing I don't think

I was supposed to be here It's like this isn't my life

I belong in a different one My life is at an advanced placement level

While my brain is at special education level

I'm too sensitive

And too weak They were right

About me after all Bang, Bang