and on some random thursday afternoon i realised that life isn't so bad after all. there are so many beautiful things i haven't experienced yet, so many places i've never visited, so many people i haven't met. i realised life is too short to hate myself.
quick study tips now that I've almost finished my masters: follow study with me videos on youtube. download cold turkey website blocker on your laptop and liberate website blocker on your phone. chew gum while studying. play an instrument, knit/crochet, or move while on study breaks instead of going on your phone. always keep your study space clean. wear noise cancelling headphones with no music playing (that's my cue to focus). eat plenty always and bring snacks. know when to stop. learn when you focus best, and only plan to be able to work during those times- schedule errands / meetings / hobbies / rest during times when you know you won't be focused. schedule at least one full day per week where you have no responsibilities. if you're too tired to work, take a nap instead of sitting there numb and exhausted with dry eyes. you can skip class sometimes (trust me). know when "good enough" is enough (and when it's not).
Midnights is for the girls who worked hard to get a life of their own, but now feel empty, it's the album you listen to when you're alone in the kitchen with no partner to cook with, no friends to go out with, no parents to comfort you. It's for the jo march girls, who gave up everything and everyone and pretend like it's alright but cry themselves to sleep every night, it's for the girls who stare at the ceiling for hours after coming home, it's for the masterminds, the people pleasers, for the girls who think they're unlovable, it's for the autumn/winter girls, it's for the girls who love rain and gloom, it's for the girls who read the most gut wrenching books to feel emotions, it's the ultimate sad girl album.
I have decided I want to start reading more again. I don't wanna just default to video games the moment I have free time. I have a few books I still haven't read and it's time I do. Once I'm home I'll pick out a book and just....start reading. Feeling weirdly excited for it
I'm in my manic pixie dream girl villain era
shoutout to the people that like learning, who love learning, who want to learn and understand and create things on their own terms, but can’t go to college/university. not for lack of money or access (although those are obviously valid and understandable), but because their disabilities prevent them from doing it. who don’t have enough spoons to take a university course and complete the amount of mental and physical work it entails. who are too anxious to leave home and don’t have the resources to combat that anxiety. who get burned out quickly and easily and can’t handle the amount of effort university takes. it’s not your fault and does not determine your worth - you are allowed to do what makes you comfortable. for those that mourn the loss of their college experience, i understand and your feelings are valid. whatever the reason may be, i see you.