I Am Sitting On The Couch, I Hear Tapping On The Door Behind Me, I Turn Around And See This

Sitting while another person is in the room with me is so awkward, like what do I do? Do I stand up? Do I get something to drink? Do I drink? Do I walk somewhere? Do I look at that picture? Do I start a conversation? Am I awkward? Literally all I do and wanna do is sit there

Peter: Hi

[Everyone’s ready to attack him]

Peter: Whoa, whoa, guys I’m a hero too!

Quill: What kind of hero are you?

Thor: Do you have a magic hammer?

Peter: No

Strange: Magic hands?

Peter: No

Captain America: Are you a world war 2 veteran that got genetic modified?

Peter: No

Bucky: Do you have a metal arm?

Peter: No

Loki: a god?

Peter: No

Tony: Kidnapped or enslaved?

Peter: No! Are you guys okay? Should I call the police?

Just because the show is over doesn't mean I'm over it

Tony: I am, what the kids call, full of anxiety.

Peter: Are you alright Mr. Stark, Sir?

*My mom stressing because she made a mistake once*

Me: It's fine. Shit happens. You'll do better next time. Everyone makes mistakes.

*Me stressing out because I made a mistake*

My mom: You little shit.

Steve, post IW: *climbing into dryer* I am disgusted? I’m revolted? I dedicate my entire life to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and this is the thanks I get?

fucks sake

Me: *has phone phobia*

My parents: You're on phone duty.

Me:

Lance:*acts like he just woke up* Oh sorry, I probably fell asleep while I was waiting for you to make me a sandwich.

Keith: Go back to sleep, and starve.