"In A Small Cafe At A Location So Remote It Stands In The Middle Of The Middle Of Nowhere, John - A Man

I'll use the poems I wrote about you to fuel the bonfire I'm having with my friends and watch the ashes go up and fall back down on them like gray snow

The ashes of the words I wanted to say to you get caught in their hair and makes the smell linger even after the night has died down and the fire is out

I'll cut apart the braclets I made you and use them to make matching necklaces and earrings for my friends and get happy everytime they wear them

The beads I wanted to see on your wrists will shimmer on theirs like a little reminder

I'll play your favorite song for my friends the one you were always humming in class next to me and add it to our shared playlist

The song I'll now associate with my friends

And I'll cut out every part of you from my life and you'll never had existed

Everything that was yours is theirs because there is no more you

I yearn for a way to go back and redo, I yearn to have my foot in doors of timelines I'll never see. Times when we are together, where we love freely, loudly, we hold hands, and you aren't afraid to admit what we once had.

You were always interested in humans. Ever since you were a little girl, they've fascinated you. Even though the others had always warned you about how dangerous they were, how much your kind had infatuated them with ideas of catching and capturing.... It didn't matter. All you dreamed about was to be human, to see one, to talk to one. You often rebelled, rather that be swimming too far out to shore or stealing left behind treasures, it drove your parents mad.

One day, you were swimming about, looking for some new trinket or jewelry, something lost in the ocean by a human. However, there didn't seem to be anything worth taking today. It was sunny and bright, and you decided to check it out, to get some fresh air. Obviously, you were cautious, but curiosity still overcame you. When you popped your head out of the water, you saw a ship. This intrigued you. You lived in a rather desolate and rather dangerous spot of the ocean that people - let alone pirates - ever crossed through.

The ship was large, wooden, and it had huge sails with an odd sort of emblem on it that you could only describe as some sort of...bug? With wings. You've learned about humans and the things on the land. This one was new, though, a long-ish bug, wings poking out of the sides. It was pretty.

But the ship wasn't the only thing that caught your eyes. There was a woman. Her hair, aburn, glistening in the scorching sun, her hat placed high on her head, a captain? Must be.

You swam closer, your purple iridescent scales simmered under the sunlight, your long dark hair flowing behind you. When you popped your head back up, you hid behind a large rock. Getting a closer look at her face, it was littered with freckles, her flowy blouse swaying with every wind that passed...

You've seen humans before. But this, this was different. You couldn't exactly explain it.. but something about this woman, this... captain, made you more intrigued. You wanted to swim closer, to risk it all. And in the midst of your observing... she saw you, eyes met. No, eyes locked. You snapped out of it, dipping beneath the surface. Had you really just let a human see you! You should turn away, swim home, and avoid the surface for a while. But you don't, you don't turn away. Infact you look again, rising to the surface once more.

She's still looking, but she doesn't say anything. She doesn't call out to a crew member. She isn't even suprised, she just grins. Her eyes shimmer. They're like emeralds, beckoning you closer, calling your name.

So you swim closer.

"Sometimes, I wish I could lend you my voice

Lend you my heart

And lend you my choice"

No I don't care to please you

I'll dye my hair

And peirce my face

And dress weird

And wear big glasses

Because why would I care

If you care

I'll say what I want

And write what I want

And listen to what I want

And believe in what I want

She placebo on my effect til I feel like something happened

I'm not a poet I'm a girl with a lot on my mind and a girl who thinks about someone who doesn't think about me

I'm not a ninja I'm a girl who practices the art of kyukido and loves it but will never be better than her

I'm not a parent I'm a girl with a younger brother who's parents don't seem to know the difference between right and wrong anymore

I'm not smart I'm a girl who reads sometimes and does research for fun but I only have so much surface level knowledge to keep you curious for a little

I'm not funny I steal my jokes from kids in class and tv shows and YouTube videos and old cartoons

Hell yea

you never remembered much about your early youth. most of your "memories" were jumbled fragments of random places and events that never even happened; yet you always seemed to dream about them. it was as if your whole existence from ages 1-4 was a never-ending, senseless dream that you continued to have flashbacks of even as you got older.

it all started with this one specific place. a place you felt like you remembered so well, but knew deep down it never could've existed; a place so close, yet so far. it was a giant waterpark that you swore you frequented as a young kid. it gave you such a euphoric feeling that you'd never felt before. such a nostalgia for a place that never even existed. it had 5 main watersides that now looked disheveled and abandoned, unnaturally large fake play houses used as swimming pools and bars, multiple pools, and an underground youth swim area with seemingly endless winding halls of tiles that enveloped every area from top to bottom.

you remember the time of day; twilight. the sky gleaming a beautiful neon pink and deep blue as the rest of the world was engulfed in darkness. you were there all alone after closing with only a flashlight to help guide the way. you came prepared to swim in your swimsuit, yet all the pools lacked any water. this didn't make sense though, the last time you checked, it was the middle of the summer, and you had just been there just a week prior. nonetheless, you still slowly inch your way around the park despite your gut telling you to just go home as you really had nothing to do.

as you're wondering what to do or where to go next, you suddenly notice the signs. so. many. signs. all claiming the same thing: "Waterpark now closed for good due to multiple reports of children going missing." you're taken aback; since when was this an issue? after pondering these signs for a bit, you realize that you aren't supposed to be there. you don't know what made you think going to a waterpark at this time was reasonable in the first place, but now, due to the endless array of alarming signs, you know that you are not welcome in the slightest. however, as soon as you make up your mind in the midst of this chaos, the continuous sounds of cars completely disappear; the little amount of streetlight that was helping illuminate your journey was gone, and the noise of the forest surrounding you was nonexistent. you freeze in fear, knowing that what you got yourself into was not safe and likely otherworldly.