Okay I’ve Done 24-30 Hours Without Eating But Most Of That Was While Sleeping, This Is My First Time

DAY FOUR OF LOCKING TF IN

I did pretty solid today, I managed to eat a small cookie without it triggering a binge. Continued with OMAD, hopefully will OMAD tomorrow as well. I’m going to a movie with my friend so I’ll bring some gum so I don’t eat the popcorn.

Consumed: 650 ish? Kinda hard to tell

Burnt: 60 (not as much as usual but blehhhh)

Total: 590 ish

Not much to say. I’ve definitely noticed my bloating going down but idk if I’ve actually lost anything. My parents are super onto me. Lowkey I’m at the point where stomach bloating is a pain but mostly easy to work off(?) but my arms/legs are HUGE and I hate it. My calves are actually pretty muscular and my lower arms are super skinny but my upper arms are HUGE

Okay literally no one is going to see this but I need to vent. TW for an @na related vent ig

Okay my last account got t-worded and like two weeks later my parents confronted me about my ED and have been making me eat a lot more. I got caught in a binge cycle for about two weeks where I’d fast for two days, binge, OMAD, then binge for three days. It was disgusting and easily one of my lowest points with this shit. I’ve just barely been able to break that and been going back to my regular workouts/fasting. Today I managed to sneak away from my parents to weigh myself on a public scale (no scale in house bc my parents are super fucking onto me about this) and I gained FOUR POUNDS. WTF. I’ve never gained more than like two pounds since developing an 3d, I feel so gross. Great motivation but I’m also SO scared for summer break when I’m around my family all the time. Just going to eat as little as possible, give me all your motivation PLEASEEE. Currently 107 lb or 48 KG, feel free to f@t sh@m3 me and shit like that.

@na is making me touch starved, I fear. I jerk away every time someone touches me because I don’t want them to feel how f@t I am. Even though literally no one gives a fuck except me.

Please Reblog is Your Blog is Safe for Non-Binary People.

If my mutuals can’t rb this then we can’t be mutuals

Ughhhggggg my parents definitely know I saw stuff about “signs of 3Ds in my kid” and stuff like that in their search bars. Plus they’ve been on my ass lately I’d be shocked if I’ve gained less than five pounds.

DAY TWO of locking the fuck in again bc I have to lose at least seven pounds by summer 🗣️🗣️

Okay OMAD is still going well, I just wish my family didn’t pay so much attention. Also all the calories today are a little iffy bc a lot of this I couldn’t properly measure.

I ate three bits of pound cake bc I was forced to socially (about 40 cal) and Pad Kra Pao. TBH I have no clue how many calories that was. According to google it could be anything from 200-700+ cals. I’m thinking it’s on the smaller side bc my family uses NO spices but idk.

I was exhausted today (testing while starving is NOT for the weak aka me) so I only walked one mile and did a couple dance workouts. That should have burnt around 150-200 calories. Overall no matter how much the Pad Kra Pao was it was still a deficit, and I’m proud to have kept up these workouts/drinking more water. Tomorrow I have the day off school and I probably won’t be able to walk bc my mom started questioning me about it. She pretty much knows I have an ED so “overworking” myself via exercise will freak her out. Unless I could find a way to sneak around her but we’ll see. Here’s to not binging on my day off ✊

Lmao this post was actually the one that got my last blog t-worded, nothing else I ever posted blew up like this. Weird to see it in the wild.

The results I expect after one good day:

Logging back onto Tumblr after a completely avoidable binge

I hate binging

it makes me feel sick and gross and ugly

when I eat too much I want the feeling to go away as fast as possible

Dear future me, please don’t ever binge