When You Forget One Of Your Brothers Is Legally Dead

Bruce once said, half-jokingly, that anyone who wanted to marry any of his kids had to beat hik in single combat first. Unfortunately, joking on the Bat looks dead serious to everyone not in his circle, so now Wally is busy learning Muay Thai, Roy is brushing up on Krav Maga, and Conner has resigned himself to living in sin. Steph just figures she'd ask Cass to fight her battles for her.

Conner: I’m sorry. I love you, but we can never marry.

Tim, thinking about who he might need to politely go ask Jason to take care of:

Conner, entirely serious: I’m never going to be able to beat your dad.

Tim, hearing “beat UP” because he was thinking about Jason punching Luthor:

Tim: I feel like further explanation might be necessary here.

Wally: Okay. I think I’m ready to fight Batman.

Dick, only half paying attention: *nods* I understand completely. I have the same urge all the time.

Jason: What do you MEAN you can’t marry me because Batman will beat you?

Roy: But Bruce said-

Jason: I don’t care what Bruce said. Actually, no. I do care. How DARE he-

*cut to Jason fighting Batman*

Roy: So does this count, or…

Bruce, at six am in a bathrobe and slippers: Steph, what are you doing here?

Steph: Outsourcing.

Cass: *comes flying at Batman from two stories above*

When tony found out that Peter can hear heartbeats, he immediately made an upgrade to all of the Iron Man suits:

If FRIDAY senses critical vitals or a massive injury, a deep tone will play from within the suit, deep enough it’s not really audible to anyone else.

Peter can hear it though. Peter can hear it loudly enough that he can’t hear the wearers slowing heartbeat.

Peter didn’t have to listen to Tony’s heart stop.

Fanfiction Club: The Rules

This idea came to me when I woke up first thing this morning.

I’m sorry, if you are an anti-choicer and you call a fetus a “pre-born child” I am just straight up going to laugh at you

Today I saw certain (I hope younger) fandom members doing a thing on twitter where they called out fandom-famous fics and saying how bad they are.

And, no. We don't do that. We aren't rude to each other like that. If we don't like a fic we move on and find one we do like. We do not go slagging it off on twitter to make ourselves look cool.

Authors, artists, video editors, gif makers: all of these people give huge amounts of their time to provide you with content for free. They don't owe anyone anything, and being cruel about what anyone makes is below us as a fandom.

Blind Tumblr users: don’t get the latest iOS app update!

I just updated my tablet to the newest version of the tumblr app for iOS and it completely broke screen reader access for both VoiceOver and Spoken Content. This has happened in the past already, so I will file a support ticket and copy-paste my text from last time, but this really sucks. I sincerely hope this doesn’t affect all screen reader users, but I’m unsure how they could program this bug in a way it only affects me. If you rely on a screen reader to use the tumblr app, I’d advice to not get the latest update to be on the safe side.

When I say “completely broke access”, what I mean is that no posts on my dash or on individual blogs get read or recognized at all. No plain text, alt text, tags, etc. Note count and buttons still work though.

If you also run into this bug, here’s my advice. If anyone has something more useful, please tell me

File a support ticket and report this bug

Use the browser web version, which still works for me

Interestingly, if you save a post to your drafts and click on “edit” the post text seems to get read correctly. This might be a work-around for some people.

If you have the latest version but your screen reader didn’t break, also please tell me! I would be fascinated to know if this bug is only affecting some people

TL;DR: The latest tumblr app update for iOS made it so screen readers no longer work in the app

Please boost!

shoutout to bruce wayne bc despite him having two very clear rules for his kids, “1) don’t kill, 2) don’t die” his kids are incredibly skilled at breaking both of those rules

Eddie *gets set up with vanessa*

Buck: ghost her

Buck: *meets natalia*

Eddie: "dating someone you rescue always ends bad"

These guys have literally never been supportive of each others relationships.

Eddie hated Abby and Taylor, and Buck literally talked Eddie into breaking up with Ana.

That's not normal friend behavior