Questions

White Memorial

I don't like to be

Distracted by the hand held

Devices of now

I just like the quiet

I'd rather just be silent

And just listen to...

Boardwalk bridges that

Sound like a xylophone that

Lead to spiderweb,

Facial masks, that lead to

Nature's cotton candy, that

Are cattail trails, yet

With all these great things

It seems like people don't like,

To listen and watch

Send It

I disappeared for awhile

So if you don’t recognize my name that’s why

Coming and going is sort of my style

(sigh)

If you can’t remember me you once called me deep

I’m basically your mini me, who refuses to go down without a fight

Aka internet creep (kidding)

Poetry is what I like to write

All this time I hope you didn’t have a strange hunch

I see another moon

Then there goes another month

I hope I’ll be able to put words on paper to you soon

You probably think that I fell off the face of the earth

I’m not done existing yet!

Two days we both hate but everyone else loves is the date of our birth

I hate pity so, over me don’t fret

I realize that even gut girl,

Doesn’t have real magic

And can’t save me from my world

I’m slowly breaking free of the chains that have had me trapped, full of rage I have had it

On my team

It’s just you and me

That’s not entirely true to this whole befuddling scheme

I’m not the only one with a forever scraped knee

Will I write back to you before I get old and grey?

For some reason I’m scared

Then before I know it there goes another day

Should I even care?

Writing I have forgotten how

Where is my “brave” voice?

Maybe you could understand this, Meow!

I’m starting to think that braveness is a crazy choice

I haven’t written to you in so long

Will writing to you be my fate?

Too good to be true, someday I bet you’ll be gone

I remind you of your younger self so at least you can strongly relate

For now I don’t think I’m brave enough

To reach you again

My feelings seem to be in cuffs

But even though I haven’t talked to you, I hope that we’re still good friends

You were my fog horn

While my strength was dwindled

Kept me from getting more torn

No more will I get swindled

You understand the weird problems with anxiety

And all of the faking

Sorry you saw me,

When I was breaking

I don’t like rooms with big unspoken elephants

After all there might be a goodish brain in my head

To win the war of hurtful words I must be more intelligent

Moons ago this is what should have been said!

Don't Ever

Too good to be true

In the back of my head I knew

Do you really have a freshman crush?

You're still keeping hush

You're a chicken

You're heart is too alive and kick’n

You fall in love to easy

In my world it’s cold and breezy

You loved me

Please

Just tell me how come you don’t want me anymore?

I thought you wouldn't walk out the door

I see how you're just going to leave me like this

Without my first kiss

I was so ready

I won’t believe you if you ever ask me to go steady

Don’t you even dream about coming back!

Intelligence is what you lack

You're kissing a golden one goodbye!

I can’t wait for you to move in four months, I'm not going to lie

Broke my heart without even touching it

You need to teach yours how to heel and sit

I remember when I was still…

I was chewing the idea of you and I over and over like a sweet jolly rancher in my mouth

You're such a hot head you have to move south

Why don’t you just tell me?

Don’t break me slowly while you get to flee

That rumor I heard

It hurt, I now see you as a wimpy little turd

Do you want to change that?

Or are you just going to keep on hiding under your uninterested mat?

The weather is angry

I'm all strangely

Come near me at your own risk

Permanently scratched your video game disk

Oh I can be bitch!

I'm that annoying out of your league back itch

So you don’t want to love this blue eyed mess?

Boy, I'll make you confess

Straight to my face

I'll beat you at the end of the race

You'll want be back after

When that happens I'll be the one making all of the laughter

Working The Night Shift

People think I'm lazy

But I'm awake for the same amount of time they are

I am just awake and asleep at a different time

They see me sleeping all day

But that’s because I'm awake all night

They say the early bird gets the worm

But what if I happen to consider myself the worm?

Not only that but…

The second mouse gets the cheese

I'm nocturnal

Either that or I was meant for the other side of the planet

But I do like seeing the stars

Street lights and few cars

It’s nice to be unbothered

By anyone really

Daytime people

Won’t understand the mood

Of Ziggy Stardust or the Dark Side of the Moon

Only Spacetime Oddities

Know about the secret societies

That only meet in the night,

Only to mess with the forces

Of the good, the bad, and the gravity

Along with pronking springboks  

What Will Happen?

What will happen when this bird gets out of the cage

Will it sing and fly

Or just sit there and die?

A face full of tears

Yet none of them want to fall

An infant full of years,

Slamming doors

To close off the past

Of the hidden wars

Might as well recreate my kindergarten picture

Of a small person with the world’s tiniest smile

What a mixture

A probable mistake

A theory

Of sour birthday cake

The same will of wanting a way out

Few know what it’s like to be born into the wrong world

I'm an alien trying to find a realistic route

Hands in little fists

Ready to punch a hole in your inflexible plan for me to follow

So many things wrong with that I could make paper flowing lists

I can see my blonde hair back in my face

That I once cut into uneven bangs

Those pictures you try to erase

Like the pictures of my big toothless grin

When I had a badass black eye

My wild heart you can’t win,

With dance recital dresses

This Rockette will not dance anymore

The reason is just as good as your guesses

I'm not your special girl

I'm not anyone’s except my own

And you thinking otherwise makes me want to hurl

What will happen with this girl

When she is free of the nest

Despite her fears and guilty love, will she fly like the rest?

I Want to See You Again

The smell on your shirt, has left

I used to get high off it

If ever, it will be years until the next time I see you

I know you’re not who a lot of people think you are

When is the next time I can capture the bass clef?

Elegant painfully good songs

Not that I’m jealous

No luck

Neglecting my big dream

Knowing, if you work hard you can less wrongs

I’m going to try to up my game

Kangaroo it up

Knotted, and stuck tight

Knocking and banging on my dream's ragged, hard door

Cars so many, with people most of the same

Ought to be different and stand out

Right away I realized that I want it

Ringing in my ears the impact you made on me

Raging sea of bloodsweet, heartful music and people

Unfair richness, born with an endless money spout

Oh why?

Yelling and screaming for another chance

Yak club, I can’t afford the cost to see your face

For I will deny

I Stay Up At Night

I stay up at night wondering

If you like me too

I have tried to let thoughts of you go

I don’t ask because I'm not ready for the answer of, no

I remember that time

We stared into each others eyes

Between both pairs of our blue eyes blinking

Were you thinking what I was thinking?

Probably not

You're far too perfectly professional

I know I'm quite

Silly for dreaming about this turning out right

Part of me wants to leave our story off here

Rather than adding the flames to the fire

And you’ve had enough space and time to let

You forget

What being together was like…

Living what life had to offer in only fairytales

With the guidelines of never to kiss,

Only to miss

I was defenseless against

Knowing that finding another one like you will be practically impossible to do

Dancing with each other, only metaphorically, while making up our own constellations

All because of our catch-22 situation

I don’t know about you, but I remember that time

You sat so close in front of me

We touched at clothed knees

From just that I could feel the electricity

I can feel your love wearing off

As you have begun forgetting me

Wearing off like a good view

Always happens to do

I’m Diseased

I’m diseased of adults

Assuming the worst from me

When it is just me

Then they give me a hard time

For nothing

I’m diseased of being a millennial

And adults assuming

That I’m lazy

And addicted to my phone

When it’s just me who just so happens to be different

I’m tired of feeling

Like I’m worthless

And no one will ever

Truly

Fall in love with just me and I them

I’m diseased

Of teachers

Thinking they are better

Because of a degree

At the moment I’m just 1,000 degrees of rage

I don’t want to go to school

I don’t want this factory process

Of being separated

Embarrassed

And torn apart

I’m diseased of being a product

And not a person

The only thing I’ve learned from school

Is that if you don’t want to be bent around

Then keep your mouth shut

I’m diseased with adults

Smoldering my fire

My passion

My,

Will to live and carry on…

Inside

The past is the past

It may not have been the best

Let’s just leave it at that

But soon I'll be free from this wrecked nest

Right now it's not fun

It's those memories

I should hurry up, get over it and be done

Families that feel like enemies

The stares that pierce through you

They judge

But they don't have a clue

Their stubborn heads won't budge

I now look forward, so don't make me look back

I will be better someday

I won the treasure by slapping the jack

I didn't mean it like that way

No one to trust

No one to hold and clutch

Heat full of tumble weeds and dust

Not even a love touch

I was invisible

They didn't care

But anything is live-able

So I built my own lair

They didn't pay attention either

Suck it up and deal

Never got a breather

No one cares how I really feel

Say that you love me then break me like a china plate

Why did you make me sit on a towel?

Well now you're too late

Never had good bowels

Always felt out of place

I'm sorry but some things can't be forgiven

After things happened I don't feel safe

But I'm going to keep on live'n

Always felt different and weird

In a bad way

I tried to make all of it disappear

Nobody I wanted ever stayed

Tears roll'n down my cheek

They hit the floor like glass

The feelings that are deep down are antique

It can happen that fast

I've learned how to turn myself into a rock

Always picking up my own head

It causes me to have writers block

While people eat the meat, I don't whine and take the bread

No one cared if my head drooped down

I was forced to walk alone

They ignored me when one my face there was a frown

That's when my heart turned to stone

World and Politics

Why can’t we all be more like death?

Not giving a care

But taking all

Fighting those with a strong will to live, very unfair Bringing people back home to their center of magic earth

Stardust people

Why can’t we work together and fight this?

Is it because some believe it’s the end and not to mess with the steeple I guess to get a compromise they must argue themselves in circles

Two sides like an infinity sign

Adding onto ideas and holding ground back and forth

I think we the people need to rewind What are we actually trying to achieve?

Rather than spewing insults and points back and forth

We could keep the goal in mind, for us to save the world

The glaciers melting in the North We the people, never forget to shake hands at the end

That’s my favorite part

When we all come together,

We are all on this planet with similar problems; I hope we can live heart to heart