Flit Flirt

A Night With Friends

I don’t mind where life takes me, as long as,

I can be free and freeze in the dark

Sounds horrible but you wouldn’t understand

That’s because you'd rather it be light, and warm

But the light can leave a bad mark

And the warmth keeps you on land

Flying is more fun

There are many unknown,

Mysteries that hide,

That you can find only when you're on the run

Freezing reminds you that this is probably real

It keeps you there with possible illusion of your friends

My imagination knows that I need to be the teenager I am

The idiot that loves to be goofy and loves to have a good laugh

The kind of laugh that makes you addicted all over again

The one that makes you forget about the study guide you must cram,

Painfully into your head that doesn’t deserve to be broken in half

The kind of laugh that makes you forget about everything that doesn’t matter to the tip of this pen

To laugh so hard that I’ll forget the definition of depression and anxiety and just take flight,

Away from the lies

And freeze my scars and the oncoming wrinkles so they can’t leave a mark

Run to gain some height

To get out of earshot of their cries

And just know that together we are a single spark

It hailed

It was a storm trooper halestorm

I tried to count the raindrops

And failed

Because I can only count to four in correct form

Then we jaywalked in front of the cops

I want to go all night,

With you guys

Go all the way and see the sun come and break the dark

And then go to bed and not have me, myself and I fight

Go to bed content with who I really was today and take to the skies

And fall asleep on the blue side in the park

Reality

Filthy skin

I'm itching

To be an orphan

I'm waiting for lives to be gone

By then I'll be old

I'll be too late

I'm a failure either way

I need it badly

It's stuck on me

It has ruined me many times before

So I must go off to battle

See you long

Hidden secrecy

Private

Not stolen

My head is free unlike any words trapped on paper Memories run wild,

Fading

Should I let them slip,

Away?

I'm stuck in a lazy jail cell

I can't dig my way out in rhythm

If I could I'd still be stuck,

In an unfortunate life

I keep telling myself it's not going to happen

I already had my hopes set on fire

They're ashes of reality now

Oh reality...

Misfit

I am tired of being a misfit

Fitting in everywhere

But wandering from group to group

From the orchestra cult

To the theater people and the bookworms

To other misfits

Once one group or relationship ends

I move on to the next

Always crashing into new souls

I’m tired of it being this way

I am a nomad

But I’d like for some people to stick with me

I can never find a tribe

That I can call my life

Because part of my heart often belongs in multiple places at once

I sometimes get bored of people,

Outgrow them

No one seems to care enough to hold on as hard as I try

So I simply let them go and I carry on soul surfing

I should trying crashing hard into another one

Then maybe we’d get stuck like shards of glass you can’t live without

It's Working

Head spinning

Head winning

Heart cruising

Heart losing

Brain barely working

Brain thoughts lurking

Feet walking

Feet stalking

Knees yell

Knees swell

Shoulders weak

Shoulders seek

Forehead sweat

Better yet

Befuddled

Everything is muddled

Hands shake

Fingers break

I'm so dependent

I sure am happy I sent it

You make me loose

I am a really silly goose!

When you disappear I miss you

I don't have a clue

I trust this one

Half the battle with you has been won

How and why is what I ask

What if you are wearing a mask?

I'm stuck with a bad case of the what if's

Those two words leave me hanging off cliffs

I will let you slither into my shoe, you already know it's a slipper

You understand fart rippers

Head no longer twirling

Heart won, happily whirling

Walking Away

I saw my love again,

But through a loop hole in the chain

That I was behind, letting my Novocaine down a street drain I’m invisible

If she saw me, it’d be worse

Walking miles away until the next curse Hopefully there will be a next time

I’ll go through it just for the sight of her

For what I wished we were Going fast out of pain

The shackles cut deep

As I don’t make a peep… Except for the dry leaves

Keeping my poise,

Through the leafing noise I left with the lonely winter leaves

Bare trees

Unbearable, white, snow-capped knees I saw her

Thankfully her loveliness didn’t spot me

With my weakened, shaking knees

Day Dream

I day dream because I accidentally woke up today

When reality struck noon

I was soon,

Met with what other people say

Being the drama queens that they are

They made a small thing into a big deal

And now I feel

Less than par

I'm also annoyed

With Jay

Because he has a hard time seeing things my way

It seems that he likes to avoid,

Putting himself in my shoes

As I do his

Give us a quiz

And I know who would lose

During school

He was my favorite subject to study

But now he has made my shoes all muddy

He insecurely lives on gender roles like a fool

And it messes with my side

Of knowing that I don’t need a guy

To protect me from my

Nonexistent fear of getting pied

But at the same time of being annoyed

I like being together

All cuddled up in the blankets of bad weather

And a bolt of cuteness you created for me and destroyed

I crave you

And your touch

So much

That I wish I could wear you like and outfit of blue

Its hard to be in love with the earth

When there are so many things wrong with it

Sometimes it just rains shit

And I don’t feel very full of mirth

I daydream like Walter Mitty

Because it makes life way more fun

Than it actually is when you're on the run,

In the ghetto city

Brokenhearted

I left brokenhearted

I guess that’s what growing up is like

Even though I never really seem to grow up

And I guess that’s the problem

How do you grow up?

Why do you grow up?

If I can keep it from being my fault

I don’t want to become one with the boring adults

With them, time has run its course and mellowed

Time wears you smooth like sea glass

And it doesn’t stop for anyone, anything

From our minds it can go fast and slow

I don’t want to mellow

I will not fall in love with classical music, I’ll stick with 2CELLOS

Why stop rocking out?

Why stop having sharp edges?

I'm already getting jealous of young age

At the same time being jealous of an older age

But not quite jealous of death,

No, not quite

Is it better than being in pain?

Is it better being lonely?

It’s not very funny

When you run out of living money

I am jealous of how my generation gets put into stereotypes

When they say we’re all going to lose our hearing

Then you ask what type of stereo we like

And I’ll say I don’t like any!

Don’t put us in groups

You seem to like talking in stiff loops

Why should we respect you when you don’t respect us?

Do you think respect is a one way street?

Groups of stupid, lazy, unhealthy

I'm going about to turn the tables; this is actually all your fault

Thanks for handing us our high school diplomas with a nice finishing touch, debt

You could have tried to hand us a nice life

Do you think we are happy in our hellish lives?

Do you think we all fit into one singular standard?

Some of us are working hard so we might have a glimpse at a small chance,

With a lonely, painful, brokenhearted romance

Dreams

The boat left without you, you were too late

What would you do?

Just to chase your dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you jump into the water?

Would you do that even if you risked the chance of hypothermia, and just swim?

Does your dream fill you to the brim?

The bus left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase an easily broken dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you start running?

Would you do that with hurting side stitches?

Dreams can be b*tches

The train left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase your dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you try to follow the train tracks?

You’d never be able to keep up with the train

Dreams can take away your spoons, and drain

The plane left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase your already pulverized dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you drive?

You’d be late

Someone could steal your shattered fate

The team left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase you nearly impossible dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you push too hard and make yourself sick

Dreams can be d*cks

So what you missed your dream?, find a new one!

What do you think is fun?

Find one that you’re not too late for

Open your eyes there’s many doors

Protect you dream with your life, with the fire in your eyes, you’ll never get stuck

To life’s troubles you can just say f*ck!

Hair

I remember when I could run my fingers through my hair

And end up with a concerning amount of hair in my hand

Luckily I have thick hair so it wasn’t noticeable

I didn’t have much control

Over my body and what it was doing

And I felt frustrated over my hair

It turns out that when your body is worried about survival

It will neglect your hair and fingernails

I find it ironic that those two things will appear to grow after you’re dead

Anyways, I remember getting chubby cheeks

From steroids

And I felt ugly for not knowing who I was at 13

Then I grew my hair out really long

Since it seemed like the longer your hair was,

The cooler you were when it came to the strange rules of the popularity of high school girls

I grew my hair and started to feel as if I could hide behind it

As if I could hide my depression behind it and act like it didn’t exist

But I also remember how heavy with water it would get when I showered

So I had the idea of cutting it

Short

And decided to write my own rules for the popularity of misfits

And now my hair is getting longer

In a way I like it and in another I hate it

But what does a girl’s hair mean anyway?

I’ll Just Be

Do you really want to know what gets me out of bed in the morning?

Fucking lies

I tell myself that I'm okay

But I'm secretly anticipating, and bracing for your goodbyes

How's life?

When my life is good, it's a fake kind of good

But I'm alright

I miss being in the woods where I once stood

Was I really ever there?

I think I was born guilty

Yet I know I'm always fine

My skin is filthy

I can't sleep,

Because of a haunting childhood

I'm seriously okay

I'd give it all up for poetry if I could

I don't want you

It's too late

I'll survive

I'm forced to carry a heavy slate

I secretly enjoy it

This way I'm free

I'm still alive

So for now, as I always am, I'll just be