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This morning, my therapist shared this really useful hack and I feel like it could be useful to share: it is the pie chart method.
Essentially, it is a great tool to identify the behaviours, situations and events that caused a certain effect, in order for you to truly understand what really happened.
You simply draw a circle, identify the circumstances that caused the outcome and give each situation a percentage of its influence on the outcome.
For example: you bake a cake but it turns out horribly. It could be that 45% of the fault could be given to the oven that has malfunctioned, 30% to the wrongly calculated measurements of the ingredients, and 25% of your inexperience baking a cake. In the end, you will realise that it may not be your fault, and therefore you should stop being so angry at yourself.
Disclaimer: sometimes the fault could be given to you. This is a useful method for those of you who may constantly be harsh to yourselves.