invidere
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56 posts
Latest Posts by invidere
I am aching for a life where I haven’t already failed at the ripe age of 20
Being a stupid impractical moron means never understanding how and why others think of you as stupid and childish. What’s your Problem why must I think like you Why must I worry myself with the materialistic affairs and ambitions you concern yourself with? Sometimes I think This is simply who I am and feel conviction in my desires and outlook on things but then I feel as though I should cower before others. Practical minded people are so Bad and Mean to me You’re all judgemental and hurtful I hope you feel sad for hurting a sweet creature like me. Shame on you!
Need to be healthy need to take care of my body Need to tend to this vessel need to maintain it need to eat healthy no junk food I need to exercise
My first love will always be physics
I’ve been really sad and scared so I’ll fantasize about living in the castle with my sweet Lover prince and when he sees I’m sad he’ll take me on a horse ride and we will go sit and watch the sunset and he’ll buy me my favorite food and we’ll eat supper and then he’ll kiss my forehead and I’ll feel better and then we’ll go back to the castle and he will hold me and I will fall asleep in his arms and when I wake I won’t be plagued with sadness and fear . He will have pat me to sleep.
Assumptions on me
Brain : smooth
Activity: negligible
There is no desire without fear.
The opposite of anxiety is not calmness, it is desire. Anxiety and desire are two, often conflicting, orientations to the unknown. Both are tilted toward the future. Desire implies a willingness, or a need, to engage this unknown, while anxiety suggests a fear of it. Desire takes one out of oneself, into the possibility of relationship, but it also takes one deeper into oneself. Anxiety turns one back on oneself, but only onto the self that is already known. There is nothing mysterious about the anxious state; it leaves one teetering in an untenable and all too familiar isolation. There is rarely desire without some associated anxiety: We seem to be wired to have apprehension about that which we cannot control, so in this way, the two are not really complete opposites. But desire gives one a reason to tolerate anxiety and a willingness to push through it.
Open to Desire
Mark Epstein
Pet peeve:
someone makes a statement on how society socializes women to focus on their appearance and dress up in ways men never have to in order to look good/feel good/and feel valued but now comes another woman [choice feminist] saying: ‘But if you want to wear makeup it’s your choice! Remember it’s always okay to do what’s best for you!”
The mere idea that it is women alone who are expected to perform beauty rituals to simply be comfortable enough to exist in many places makes you uncomfortable. You jump to defend make-up despite no one condemning make-up in totality… look at our feminists!
I need people to stop interpreting my fear as regret. Let me feel afraid. Let me have the courage to do what I want and if I become afraid in the process, don’t interpret that as regret and argue I was better off doing something else! I feel afraid very often and if this fear is indeed regret maybe I should kill myself
Ordered a linear algebra text book. Came today. Very pleased. Flipped through it and frowned. What is this! I plan to read through it a bit before classes start this fall because I’m taking diff eq and linear algebra and I am quite unfamiliar with linear algebra
Read a paper whose research was of the theoretical nature! It appears thermal physics is Very interesting and I must learn about the generalized uncertainty principle and instantons.
Reading papers and making a document with links to my favorite ones. “Favorite” here means papers that I read through and gathered some insight from. To be fair it’s a matter of readability. Did I read through it? Can I read through it? Then it’s my Favorite paper just for that. I want to learn more and read more papers and eventually I’ll have Favorite Papers that aren’t based on the mere fact I read through them. Next: reading a paper that outlines the thermal developments of the universe
I am currently very afraid of being stupid and dumb. It’s the worst thing one can be. I’m afraid I’ll dumb down even more I can’t imagine living a life where I’m stupid and dumb and I continue to get more stupid and dumb. It’s my nightmare I need to exercise my brain
I tried deriving the Lorentz factor for the second time last Night and well the geometry was quite straight forward but the algebra :-< Have I. Become the people who get to calculus and begin struggling with basic math… Help! I didn’t finish it but I’ll try it again but to bypass that algebraic manipulation I might do the derivation with the parallel wires which is arguably more rigorous
Your Will shall decide your Destiny
Neeed to derive centripetal force. and derive the Lorentz factor Again
I have an intuition the chain rule was used here but I don’t have sufficient knowledge of differential equations to understand fully how it works
Seeking to understand how drift velocity is quite low and slow while there’s an almost instantaneous feedback of circuit information once the connection is closed and the voltage is established. I see that drift speed is different from the speed at which the particles collide with one another within the wire too, that collision (or thermal?) speed is notably higher than drift velocity . But how is this almost instantaneous feedback of information possible ?
Is it just me or is E&M simply not as intuitive as mechanics? Help
It struck me as odd to see men act as though women are coddled for their emotions while men are told to man up. No one has coddled my emotions and it’s a very few times they’ve been validated. Women have been seen as overly emotional creatures who can’t form rational judgements— hysterical, crazy, and insane.
the biggest bullshit everrrrr is when people say "men and boys are punished for crying whereas women and girls are validated and comforted" it's such bullshit people will literally see a woman crying and call her an evil manipulative bitch
Repetition is pushed in math and physics but there’s an intuition you (ought to) develop as time passes. Physics is intuitive but it might be possible to do well in beginner level classes without having a strong conceptual or intuitive understanding of what systems you’re looking at (it might even be possible to go through undergrad without a strong intuitive understanding as stated by some physics grad students who didn’t have this until after their undergraduate years). As an engineering student I see my engineering peers move through introductory physics but when they try to explain things or solve a problem they haven’t seen before, they have no clue. This is because they trained themselves to do problems. They didn’t train themselves to think. They also rely on equations but don’t have any regard for the derivation. Memorizing equations can get you places but not very far, after a while.
I wish I could think like a physicist. I want to make the right assumptions. I want a grasp on the system without needing numbers. I want to make solid predictions on what will happen in a system even if I’m not familiar with it. I’m not equipped with it now but this is something I hope will be developed as time passes. It’s not a one day development, of course.
I notice mathematical intuition is also something that’s lacking in students because it’s not taught to be a priority. I’m not sure if this intuition can even be directly taught, I don’t think it can be.
I see what you mean when you say practice is encouraged in order to do better at problems and how this idea of developing an intuition, which will be your greatest asset in physics or mathematics, isn’t prioritized.
I think something that was underemphasized in my education was the framing of learning as a process that occurs over time.
I mean, to some extent and more so in certain subjects, you are just looking to accumulate some static information in your brain*. but I think most professors would say they are ideally looking to impart a more nebulous sort of skill in "how to think". like, if you are studying mathematics, you need to know the content, and be able to prove theorems, but you also want to be developing a sort of intuition for thinking mathematically.
[*I said this originally in the draft, but in fact even static information seems to be best acquired through spaced repetition!]
they will tell you to practice problems, of course. but it is framed as a way of getting better at doing the problems, not as a generalisable skill. not like in: you have to move the material through your brain repeatedly in different ways to get its value. not like in: you are trying to forge adaptations, not much differently to building muscle. often like: "it might take some time to understand this [because it is hard and you will struggle with it]" (read: if I'm clever enough I could totally pull it off quickly, skill issue), but not like: time is an actual ingredient in this recipe.
I enjoy mocking certain Dostoevsky readers due to how much of a loser they are. These readers can also be pretentious and arrogant about their self proclaimed intellectual identity but as I said: they’re losers. I like dostoevsky’s writing though. I’ve read Crime and Punishment and White Nights. I enjoyed Crime and Punishment more but I resonate very deeply with the narrator in White Nights and soon hope to have a copy of the work
Never kill yourself sometimes you have to have a conversation with someone and learn something and share your thoughts life is worth living There is more for us in the world of ideas Run keep running go
Perpetually discontent because I long for intimacy but I also don’t want others to impose themselves in my space. Don’t act as though we’re close, don’t insert yourself in everything I think or do, don’t take what’s mine. What I like is mine and you’re not allowed to waltz in and treat it as if it’s your own. I feel this about the things I like learning about. It’s mine, find another subject.
My neuroscience and philosophy professor abused mt paper I got an 80 and his starting line was “There is much to be desired…” in regards to the to the introduction
Oh sweet grumpy man Please have mercy
I hope I one day have the courage to speak up and not be so afraid of being judged poorly by others. It’s so hard to speak in front of people I’m so socially incompetent
My cute large hadron collider in my pockets Tiny and cute