Mornings

We Need To Talk

We need to talk

And you probably don’t want to hear what I'm going to say

And you'll probably take it as me pushing you away

It feels like I'm suffocating

On anything other than him, concentrating

I think you need to be so near,

To combat your unnecessary fear

But if you don’t want me to go

What you should know,

Is that you need to give me a galaxy so I can fall

I don’t want to appall,

You, my case,

Is that, I need space…

That is, if you want me to fall stupidly

And hit a bullseye with me, cupidly

You need to give me a cliff

Unless you want me to go all limp and stiff

However, it is your choice if you want to catch a fallen me

But don’t make me do a lame trust fall; do we agree?

Man, I like to go all the way

So just listen to what I gotta say

Give me all of it or don’t bother with me

Can’t you see,

That lately I've been finding other things to occupy my hands and hours with

Since I am a giver, if you don’t give me space, I’ll leave you amidst,

My present of coldness that you can not return

Maybe you'll learn

And I don’t like being doted on 24/7

I guess what I'm saying is, be a little more like hell rather than heaven

“Come ‘ere”

You could move yo ass instead of pulling me near

I don’t chase boys

So if you want me you're gonna have to follow me for your joy

We need to talk

But without me, please don’t go for a walk

I want to go too

End Of A Line

When you come to the end of a line

I suggest you walk it carefully

Walk it as fearfully as you would a plank of a ship

It’s like an edge of a cliff

Walk to the edge of the unknown and take a leap

There could be words at the bottom to catch you

Let the words draw the line there

Or let the words take you out on a tightrope

In the end it just comes down to the wire

Are you daring enough to cross the line?

Situation Impossible

Just wishing and hoping ain't gonna do nothing

It’ll just make it worse

But I do it anyway because I'm cursed

  Desire equals suffering

So don’t wait and hope

Before you open your big mouth you might as well fill it with soap

  If I desire not to desire anything that’s a desire

I love you but I can't fully have you

What am I supposed to do?

  I can't win with fire

The things I wish I could tell

I want you to just know why I may not be so well

  When should I stop having just a spark of hope?

It's 1 in the morning

And I'm mourning

  I'm beginning to realize that enough is enough, no more of this nope!

I think about you a bunch

I probably never even cross your mind from time to time ever much

  You are only somewhat removed

Now it's 1:08

And you are what I now hate

  Out of my life my safe person always moves

I need someone like you

I can't really tell you but I wish and hope that you knew

  I feel like puking I don’t want to be seen

Needing you so much I'm sick

This sickness cannot be fixed with vicks

  1:13

By the minute I'm getting older

You are warm and I don’t think I can get much colder

  Wishing waiting and hoping

In this situation it is impossible

I'm so sick I need the hospital

  I don’t know what I'm thinking, I have to find a new way of coping

1:21

Thinking about you I should be done

Solitary Confinement

It felt like solitary confinement

They have my finger print

All the windows had a tint

It was hard to see

Anything but all the problems wrong with me

Drowning in the unknowing sea

Been here so long I’ve got belly button lint

Can they take the silence as a hint?

May I have a breath mint?

Outside I can hear them talking

The secrets are shocking

That door I’m locking

The things I hide

Behind some deceptive lies

My heart dies

Inside here I have no control

Maybe he is secretly the troll

Trapped is my soul

My body is so tense

Just hop the fence

It sounds like I don’t make sense

Inside I’m dead

Heavy as lead

I don’t look fed

I wonder what they are saying

In here I’m slowly but surely decaying

The video cameras revealing everything, replaying

Somehow they forgot me

I long to be free

The new, changed world, I want to see

When is the last time I saw the bright shooting stars?

As I try to imagine mars,

Through the cold, rusty, thick, medal bars

At somebody getting in their car

I wonder what their life is like

Strike, strike,

Strike

I’ll get though this

No one has ever truly been here for me, there is no one I miss

No one is one the list

My only friend in here is a flickering light

I’m not done with this fight!

Will I be forced to stay another scary, rough night?

However this room is also bliss

As I reminisce

At least I’m finally away from the battles, the silence is a gentle kiss

Observing

I sit here observing

Observing other people's lives

Observing my life Observing how the canoe

Hugs the dock

As if it knows it will be dark soon Observing the smell of the pines

And a pontoon boat going by

Observing a kid learning to scuba dive Observing the twilight sky reflected picassoed

On the fairly smooth

Glimmering water Observing a summer romance

Taking place on a tall rock

Observing my sunburnt skin peeling when I get the feeling... Observing how the mood of the water can change

So fast

So shifty The ducks already passed

Knowing this night is my last,

Probably for a while

Of this lake girl style

We Have Each Other

Depressed and weak, united we stand

Hand in hand

We hang on by a strand

We silently have each other’s backs

Someone else has what I lack

Sometimes we fall apart and crack

Some draw on their sides

Some hide

Behind a blind

When we are choking

We all have our ways of coping

But we still take each other under our wing

Sometimes dominoes that stand tall

Uncontrollably we fall

But we always get back up like a bouncy ball

But one thing that we’ve got

We understand a lot

We hope that if we draw that we'll never get caught

Between us we must

Share a secret trust

We know the feeling of having heavy hearts full of rust

We hide the pain in our eyes

Terrified of anymore goodbyes

We start faking smiles at sunrise

Most people don’t “get it”

But we do and that’s why we are close knit

Some of us have grit

We don’t use it when we need it most

Like when you're thinking about trying to overdose

Some of us like to hide in the shadows like ghosts

It’s hard to watch the change of a season

When you can’t find any real reasons

To keep fighting your vicious demons

Some of us can feel pain all the way to our bones

We think we are alone

But we’re not, together we have grown

We can do this

Our mission we won’t diss

Togetherness is almost bliss

White Memorial

I don't like to be

Distracted by the hand held

Devices of now

I just like the quiet

I'd rather just be silent

And just listen to...

Boardwalk bridges that

Sound like a xylophone that

Lead to spiderweb,

Facial masks, that lead to

Nature's cotton candy, that

Are cattail trails, yet

With all these great things

It seems like people don't like,

To listen and watch

Are You On My Team?

I'm not great at playing offense

Let's get that out of the way

But it's nice to meet you

I don't hit home runs

But I know how to throw

Like an underdog

I am defensive when I'm not talking

It's the thing I can do

It's really just the illusion of control

Being offensive

Is a thing that I can't really seem to be able to do

I'm too nice

So I don't set boundaries

Or go around punching people in the face

Because some people probably deserve it

I'm more of a pitcher

Of complaints

Rather than a batter

So

Before you go I must ask,

Are you on my team?

Your Insults Are Shitty

Your insults are shitty

But I'm wittier. Why?

Because I belong to the comeback committee

You’ve changed your way

You were kidding before but now you mean what you say

And for reasons, I stay

I'm a willing fool

Just to be somewhat cool

In my uncool way of being uncruel

The volume on my thoughts is too loud

It's like a big obnoxious crowd

But I like it loud and I'll wear my thoughts like a stereo system, proud

You keep trying to put me in my spot

But you're not

Because I don’t have one, so you might want to change that thought

Rubbing yourself like an eraser in my face

Wont erase,

Me and my bigger, better chase

You make sure that I know that I'm annoying and gross

Maybe you need to up your none existent dose

Or have your fire put out with a fire hose

Because you aren’t doing it for my own good

You're not being a friend how a friend should

In this type of hood

I thought you knew that we have to stick together

Just like how I made your essay better

I try to give you all but you choose to wear her sweater

Summer

Summer will not make me dumber

With no stress, I'm more depressed

Biased people with remainders of my past, in my brain it will never last

I can't breath; It's debilitating but I'm not suffocating

Give me a car and I'll take it far

Wishing things were different, kissing your black shoe

Waiting for that day, knowing you'll be hesitating

Waking up without a mission, then going fish'n

Feeling like you're not going to get there, life is only so fair

Dreamers with their silly fantasy dreams, fighting for them but not getting ice creams

They became depressed, while they were back in their nest

They stopped fighting, and tried rewriting

Their progress plateaued, and started the downhill flow

Then out of nowhere their flame relit, and found the way out of the pit

They wrote of sugar coated endings, to deal with the god sendings

Of summer never being a bummer